You know...this sounds rediculous, but NO ONE goes off to college with their bottle....or in diapers...or sleeping in your bed. SOme children take onger than others, but my eleven year old had a pacifier until she was three and a half and she is a straight a student, very talente, beautiful, socially well adjusted, etc.
My three year old wouldn't give up breast feeding until she was two, and people looked at me like a I was an ax murderer. The World Health Organization actually RECOMMENDS breast feeding until two, but our country is so wierd about these things.
Sucking is comforting. She just needs time! Try phasing it out, but there's nothing wrong with letting her have it at nap and bed time until you're both ready.
By the time number two rolls around, you'll learn to politely smile at the pediatrician and go home and do the best you can for your child, who doesn't understand, or care, what some chart says she's supposed to be doing and when.
Good luck!
S.