My Baby Got Hurt at School

Updated on September 23, 2010
K.M. asks from Frisco, TX
13 answers

Hi Mom's .....
The scariest of all things happened to me today. While my son was in school, my son got hurt. He broke his arm. It is uncertain at this point whether he will need surgery. A determination will not be made until Monday. For now he has been set in a sling...and can not be mobilized. We are besides ourselves with grief and just wondering if anyone can give me advice (should I contact an attorney, if so, can you recommend one?). Is the school liable at all? He clearly was not being watched and the teacher (its a one-to-one ratio - -meaning every child has its own teacher -- there are 12 in the class and they each have responsibility over each child) was not able to tell me what had happened; and worse, not until I observed him in circle time crying was a notified. So, he had gone 30 minutes before I finally interrupted class and asked them what had happened. We have spent all day/evening in emergency/radiology/orthopedic's office and just thought it could not hurt to ask each of you for some friendly mom advice. My son is 2 1/2 years old; and well, quite frankly, I am in shock and without the ability to even make clear conscious decisions at this point...so any advice would most certainly go a long way.

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C.P.

answers from Dallas on

As a mother of 3 almost grown boys, that worked in a day care environment for 12 years, I feel like I need to share my opinion here. Accidents happen. Even in a 1-1 environment. He could have simply tripped and fell and his teacher not thought anything about it. In a busy environment, even as a mom, sometimes you just pick them up look for blood and send them on their way. My son has a friend that was simply walking across the yard tripped and fell and that fall broke his arm. Don't get me wrong, that first broken bone can be pretty traumatic, usually more for the parents than the child. Your ortho specials should be able to give you some idea of how the bone was broken by the type of break. Good luck. I hope God heals him quickly and gives you peace about the matter.

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

K., sorry to hear about your son. It is heart breaking when your child gets hurt. I have 4 children and my oldest who is a boy in 3rd grade got hurt at school this year as well. We had no insurance at the time when I got the call from his teacher saying he was still lying on the playground with a possible broken collar bone and was also knocked uncouncious for a few moments. I did get mad, but I also had to realize that he was playing and running with other boys. A boy who he was not playing with decided to push him from behind. He went shoulder and neck first into railroad ties. Teachers were watching when it happened, but I can't be upset with them because they were fulfilling their jobs and trust me they took great care of him especially since I am on the PTO board at the school. I was upset with the boy who pushed my son and I made sure that the punishment he received was suffice to what my son had to go through. He also was a child who got into trouble many times before for this kind of misbehavior. My advice to you is that yes, someone needs to be held responsible for their actions of not watching him (an explanation and apology), but children will get hurt whether you, your husband or anyone else is watching them. This accident is one of many, and I mean MANY! How would you handle this if it was a family member? As far as I know you can't hold the school liable. You would pay more in attorney fees than you would probably care to know, besides money isn't going to make you or your son feel better. As a christian you should pray that God would give you wisdom and the words to speak when they need to be spoken. If you let yourself run on your emotions, it's you handling the problem, not God thru you. Seriously, as a mom of a 10(boy),8,5 and 2 year old, be prepared to face many of these incidents.

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P.S.

answers from Dallas on

Hello Kelly,

I am so sorry to hear your son is hurt. I would also be extremely upset. Last month my friend took my youngest son to her house to play with her boys. I told her to keep a close eye on him especially since he has developmental delays and just can't handle a "normal" kids rough play. Well, when I went up to the door I heard yelling and crying. Needless to say, my son had fallen down the stairs because he lost balance and couldn't hold on the railing because her son decided to play cops and robbers and handcuff my son's hands behind his back. I was FUMING when heard what happened and my son was still crying. Worse yet, she kept saying it's probably just a sprain he'll be fine. WHAT!! I just left her house and went immediately to the ER. He had severely sprained his foot and was unable to walk for 2 weeks. I have no family here besides and had to ask my MIL to come up and take care him becuase the Dr. didn't want him going to daycare. Well, I realized it was an accident and thought of suing a friend made my stomach turn. She did offer to help with the medical expenses but I declined. I'm still a little hesistant to go over to house again. As a matter of fact, I have yet to go anymore. However, I work with her and had to let the whole situation go. God has helped me with that. I really hate when people say, "boys will be boys and they WILL get hurt," but I have found that there is some truth to it.

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R.H.

answers from St. Louis on

my daughter is 9 and she broke her finger at school i was not notified at all should i call an attorney .

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

First of all, I hope your son is feeling better soon. It's heartbreaking when your child is hurt and there is nothing you can do for them. Also, you will probably never know the whole story because your son is too young to be able to retell what happened when the accident happened. The fact is all kids get hurt and with the way you are feeling right now, I would wait until you are calmer to make any important decisions. I hope your son will be fine without going through surgery and hope for him a speedy recovery.

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S.W.

answers from Dallas on

I also agree that kids are going to hurt themselves - it's inevitable. And most daycares (the smart ones, anyway) have liability policies. Check your school policies or handbook.

IMHO, a school with a 1-to-1 ratio is a bad idea. If there are 12 students, that means there are 12 adults (probably all women). Do you think that in a room (or playground) full of women that they are going to ignore each other and do nothing but watch your child's every move? Most likely, your child's "teacher" was chatting with a coworker and didn't see him fall. And even if she had, she probably wouldn't have been able to catch him or prevent the fall and with a broken bone, 30 minutes isn't going to make any difference in treating the injury. It's a broken bone, not a bleeding flesh wound.

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M.C.

answers from Wichita Falls on

If the teacher told you she had no idea what happened, do speak with the director. You deserve answers.

As you said, you are in a state of shock and getting an attorney at this point would not be good as you said you are "expecting" and congratulations on that. All the stress associated with an attorney would not be good for your pregnancy.

Find out what happened, and then know that 2-1/2 year olds are constantly on the run and these things do happen...quite frequently.

My own daughter broke her arm when she was 5...she was running on the bleachers at a football game and fell through them. The school ended up getting brand new bleachers that children could not fall through because of this. I believe they were afraid that I would sue them, which I never would have done. It was her fault...for running on the bleachers in the first place.

Good luck.

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

Hi K.,
My personal opinion is- yes. They ARE liable. You have him set up in a class where the ratio is 1-1! That is their job. Let me just say that I too, have worked in preschools, I was a nanny for 4 kids etc for YEARS and if ANY of them hurt themselves- I would definately notice the first 5 minutes! I'm not saying they were all accident free- sometimes they were big accidents- but I knew what happened- it didn't take an xray to tell them WHAT PART of the kids body had injury. Let's just say your son was obviously in pain for at LEAST 30 min before you even got to him. Now I could see maybe the teacher turned her back to get his snack, maybe went to use the restroom, or heck, blow her nose- but it would be obvious within the first 5 minutes that the poor kid couldn't use his ARM! I am furious about this story and I am amazed that they have no idea what caused it. I don't know if I would be able to contain myself in your position. I like to think I'm fairly laid back, but when it comes to kids, I lose all patience. I think you need to talk to an attorney- I am DEFINATELY not a sue happy person- my car has to many dents in it for that to be true lol...but sometimes things need to be done so it is not just you and your family who carry this burden- gosh at a 1-1 ratio the kid should be showered, fed, and have his haircut by the time he's home hehe.. I wish your little guy the best of luck in healing!

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S.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

I would speak to the director and let her know how dissappointed you are that with a 1-1 ratio no one could tell you how he hurt his arm or even THAT he had hurt his arm.

I would also know how much your entire medical cost for this is going to be ahead of time so that you can give her that answer when she asks. If your son goes to a center, they are required to have liability insurance to cover things like this.

I would not bring in a lawyer or even mention the s word unless you ask for help with those medical bills and she refuses, for several reasons:
Accidents happen. Unless it's a spiral break (in which case there would have been immediate surgrery), it wasn't anyone trying to hurt your baby.
You will probably still want to get daycare after this. Sue happy parents are much like sue happy patients - and daycares in your town may suddenly become fuller than beehives.
An attorney will take roughly 40% of any award you get - which means that you will still be paying medical bills.

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

Find a good attorney. Someone should be know what happened at the very least. That is completely unacceptable. My heart goes out to you and your sweet angel. I certainly hope that you find a new school soon.

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

At first, I was going to say no on the attorney, but after reading the rest, you go as far as you need to!!! There is absolutely no excuse 1) for it to happen if the teacher only has one child. . .I mean how can she not tell you what happened? That doesn't make sense. 2) How did they not realize it, and why was he sitting there for 30 minutes before they noticed? 3) Why were YOU the one who had to tell them that something was wrong with your child?

Take it to the director of the childcare first, and have the teacher come in as well. Don't mention an attorney yet. Find out everything, and get it in writing if you can (even if it says "I don't know what happened). Write down everything you saw and the time you saw it conversations, etc. THEN take it to the attorney who will make it known to the day care that he/she has been contacted.

I am so sorry, and of course these are all my own opinion, but it's your child, and someone needs to fight for him when he can't. It's not like he just had a bump or bruise to his shin. A bone was broken! I would not take him back to that place nomater what.

PS I see that he's 2 and 1/2. Have you asked him what happened? He should probably be able to tell you something to make things a little clear. Write it down too.

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J.J.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with most of the others. Yes a 2 1/2 y.o. boy is going to do things to hurt himself, and for that the school should not be held liable - however, purely because they can't give you details, I would say they may be at fault. My 2 y.o. has hurt himself at school (nothing broken, but enough to bleed and bruise badly and for me to worry), but when it happened the teacher called me immediately and told me exactly what happened and how they handled it. Talk to the director first and see how that goes and decide from there if you need to take further action. I would expect a greater level of safety and attention to detail with a 1:1 ratio!

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

OMG!! I am so sorry this has happened to you and your son! I am a former day care worker & school teacher, & here are my 2 cents:

Yes, they are liable. If they have a 1-on-1 teacher, there should not have been an accident. Yes, boys will be boys, but the fact that she could not even provide details on how he got hurt is inexcusable. Plus, add in the fact that he was crying & nothing seemed to be done about it!

I hope everything will be alright with your son.

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