My 7 Year Old

Updated on March 24, 2014
R.D. asks from Russellville, KY
8 answers

I lost my mother in june and every since my daughter complains about stomach pains i have taken her to the doctors and they say she conapaited but it only hurts when she thinks there is school but i never heard her complain untill after my mom died could it be from that?

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

I'd talk to the teacher and ask if they notice anything is going on between your daughter and her friends. At this age, sometimes those 'tummy aches' are a nervous response to dealing with social issues at school, including peer social aggression. Our school nurse cites nerves and emotional upset as one of the common reasons children wind up in her office complaining of 'tummy aches'. I also volunteer a lot of time at my son's school and see the first and second grade classes... there are a lot of social dynamics at play with the girls; this includes little cliques of three girls where one is usually the 'follower' of the other two and gets left out of certain things, depending on the temperaments of the more dominant girls. It's pretty icky to watch, but confusing for these young kids, who can feel that the kids treating them poorly are still their 'friends'. They aren't at an age to be more objective and see the reality of the dynamic.

That's where I would start first, if it were my child. It may be that your daughter is processing your mother's death. It's sometimes hard to know.

Have you modified her diet to help with the constipation? That might help. That said, since this is only happening on school days (by your account) the school is where I would look first. Good luck!

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*.*.

answers from New London on

Check w/ the teacher---See if anything is going on in school--on the playground or in the lunch room...bus. This is where teachers are not present.
I would want to rule that out first.

How was she over the summer when school was out?

Then, check w/ the doctor. If it does not clear---demand an x-ray. The pediatrician told me my child had constipation. She was wrong, wrong, wrong ! I went to another dr and demanded an x-ray.

So sorry about your Mom!

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The doc diagnosed constipation. I believe the doc.

If she's constipated it could be hurting in the morning from laying on the bulk all night. Once she's up moving around the bulk/weight shifts and the abdomen can carry the weight better. During the night it lays on the internal organs and puts a lot of pressure on them.

I hope they are having her drink Mirilax every day so she can expel it and not have to end up having surgery.

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes, it could. Give her lots of love, listen to her, and talk about your mother if she wants to.

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

Maybe. It could also relate to something going on in school. She could also have some sort of reflux or constipation problem that is aggravated by stress or by the worry of being too far from a bathroom.

I'm sorry you lost your mother. Perhaps your daughter is also having problems watching you deal with sadness and grief.

If the doctors think it's constipation, there are some pretty simple things that you can do. I work a lot with children's nutrition as well as kids with troubling thoughts, and they can be linked together.

I'd need more info than your post contains, though, to give any additional input.

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A.M.

answers from Washington DC on

Children grieve differently than adults and they may have psychosomatic symptoms. That said, treating pediatric chronic constipation is complex because many regular pediatricians assume that the child is trying to avoid school. See a pediatric gastroenterologist who will do testing and then come up with an action plan for your child. Mine sees a pediatric gastroenterologist, allergist, and a nutritionist who work together to manage her symptoms through medication and diet. She had to go gluten-free and mostly HFCS free. Daily exercise is a must. Not everyday is pain-free but in the past 2 years she has only missed a 3/4 day of school due to belly pain.

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V.D.

answers from Dallas on

I don't know if she is complaining about stomach pains because of your moms death. The doctor told me that cheese and bananas causes constipation. Apples and apple sauce causes you to go to the bathroom. If you think possible constipation. Keep her away from cheese and bananas. Pack applesauce in her lunch box. Apples during dinner. Try that for a few days! Talk with her teacher. Hope this helps! Praying for ya'll. So sorry for your loss!

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T.S.

answers from Denver on

How are you grieving? Are you showing your daughter that you are sad? Do you cry in front of her? It could be that you are not grieving fully or not grieving in front of her and therefore she is "holding it all inside" of her as well. She will naturally feel sad, scared, and angry at the loss of her grandmother. If she doesn't have a safe, accepting way to express her emotions she could very easily experience physical reactions instead.

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