My 7 Month Old Is a Nonsleeper in the a.m. & p.m.

I agree with the previous poster, you can't spoil the baby with the boob and besides she really is too young to be able to "hold it" until morning. Many breastfed babies really don't start sleeping through the night until well into their second year of life or at least when whole milk begins to be offered. Mine stopped when she was 13 months, just a few weeks ago.

Poor thing is probably just hungry or wants comfort. People who are uneducated about breastfeeding often see the babies as spoiled because they only want their momma it seems. Only momma can feed them and the only chance of bonding to the baby is through play or holding her, but she'd only want you for that too so they feel left out. Don't worry about it, you know she's not spoiled and that's all that matters. Breastfed babies have a few different "needs" that people don't understand a lot of times.

I'm a breastfeeding mom too, or was, till a month ago when my 14 month old weaned completely. It's hard to see your friends seemingly perfect sleeper babies and you're up at night. The truth is that breastmilk is absorbed REALLY fast and a breastfed baby should only be expected to sleep for 3-5 hour stretches at a time. That is considered "sleeping through the night". Your friends are probably formula feeding their babies and loading the bottle up with cereal (baddddd for baby, it fills them with empty nutrients and later they require more to eat to keep full and end up overeating).

I rarely hear about a breastfeeding mom who was able to put her baby to bed that easily, especially at a time like yours is at where milestones are being achieved left and right (crawling, standing, etc). All that can keep any baby awake wanting to practice. Put teething on top of that and the parents are ready to run away haha! So, throw all ideas about when your baby should sleep through the night out and get that information from a doctor rather than observing other babies.

I'd say for the sake of your sanity and to keep baby from crying too much just take her to bed with you. You would be suprised that your body and mind will not let you roll over onto your baby. You are in resting awareness at all times. I've been known to cover my baby, adjust her, etc. all in my sleep. The only way you would probably roll on her is if you're a heavy sleeper who thrashes or you are on meds. If you're comfortable with the idea, try it, it'll get you both some shut-eye, I guarantee you. You just lie there on your side and baby has at it whenever she wants and will pop off when she's ready and she'll sleep better. She probably won't nap now because she's overtired, that can happen. With a good nights rest she should be sleeping during the day normally too.

Also, I hope that you're not letting her cry for 45 minutes and not doing anything to soothe her. At least go in every five to ten minutes, pick her up or pat her, if that doesn't work to quiet her, pick her up and check her diaper, check her clothing they could be itching her or some bug could be biting at her. She could just plain be uncomfortable in that pack n play. She could be hungry. Cry it out was never meant for leaving the baby to scream and fall asleep from sheer exhaustion. There is a right way to do it, if you're not doing it the right way I suggest you learn how by reading up on it or asking a medical professional.

Did you know that extended crying like that (45 min is extended) can cause potential brain damage to your baby? Yep, you can read about this anywhere. What happens is the baby is crying so long and so much and so hard that the oxygen is getting out but they are forgetting to calm enough to take a decent breath in. They end up blocking a lot of the oxygen from getting to the brain and causing damage. It's not good to let your baby scream that long, they pretty much tire themselves out and give up hope that you're going to answer their need so they go to sleep. Once they have enough energy again they wake, realize the need again and cry some more. This can emotionally, physically and mentally damage your baby in the long-term.

Just try to be a little more sympathetic to your baby and try to find what's wrong. Sometimes there is nothing to do but let them cry, but you have nursing on your side, you can get her to stop by allowing her that at least. If she's truly teething you can always try a little tylenol before bed, it helps. Be sure to ask a doc how much though. Not everyday or for an extended period of days, but if she's really bad about it one day and you just are out of options its ok to give it. Good luck!

Good luck!

I'm sorry about your house! When we evacuated we stayed at my aunt's house. All the children had a hard time sleeping, but especially the baby. she took no naps unless she fell asleep on the floor and woke frequently during the night. This is a scary time, she doesn't know what's going on. So don't worry about spoiling her right now. Give her lots of comfort and she may start sleeping much better. Try laying down to nurse her and then put her in bed.

I recently moved my 18 month old to a twin bed. She woke crying several times during the night for the first few days, and each time I went to her and laid down with her and she went to sleep. She's not napping yet, I want her well established to sleep in the new bed before I try the naps (since she can get out she'll just stand at her door screaming otherwise.) I'm not spoiling her, just recognizing that she is scared and needs comfort.

S., mom to 5

It never worked for me to put my child in bed and let her fall asleep. I have always had to go in and help her. I don't know if this will help, but I normally let my little girl cry for 15-20 min at a time. I would go in and try to sooth her in bed. If that didn't work, I would pick her up and soothe her then lay her back down when she was almost asleep. Eventually she learned the routine and now she sleeps fine most of the time. If she wakes up at night, I normally have to go in and pat her back for a minute or so. (She is 2 and 1/2 now.) I tried to let her cry, but she would go for hours and I didn't feel like that was helping either of us. You are doing the best you can right now. You might try to get her crib into your parents house. Maybe that would make her feel more secure.

I am sorry for your troubles. Just remember, many kids don't have nurseries even in their own homes, much less their own beds. Your baby will survive and thrive through this. Have you tried any "white" noise, like a small fan running in the room or soothing music set on very low. It might be she is hearing things and it is waking her. Make sure that she is getting enough to eat. Babies go through growth spurts and for those few days will be cranky until you catch up with the feedings. Teething will keep you awake and/or not sleep well. Orajel never worked for my babies. She also won't eat well when teething. Have you tried laying with her for a few minutes just to calm her down? If you were in your own home, I might adjust this advice. But, she might feel your insecurities and it is affecting her. Lying down with her might help her feel more secure. Sure, it might not be the best habit in a normal circumstance, but at this point, it might be what she needs. But, I'll bet it is noise, hunger, or teething. Therefore, it can be remedied and will pass in time. Don't forget, kids are extremely resilient. Let me know if I can be of any other kind of help. **Also, when trying to breastfeed her at night, you should be able to tell if she is wanting comfort or really hungry by how much she latches on, how long she eats, etc. That will help you realize if she needs to tough love or is really hungry.

This is what we do with our 9 1/2 month old son. He gets cereral twice a day at dinner we mix it with baby food. He also gets jars of baby food at lunch time. We rock him to sleep in his own chair with his last bottle. Find a quiet spot to do this. We can in our living room with the tv on but with everyone all around you might need to go some where private. We wait about ten mins before moving him to his room. Where it is dark with only enough light to see to walk. A white noise machiene. If he cries durring the night I wait about five mins. If he dosent stop it means he is hungery and we give him a bottle. I was unable to nurse. Can you give her formula too perhaps she isnt getting enough to eat. We evacuated also and were gone for about a week and our son sleept in his pack and play also. We took his noise maker and chair too. He did fine. I dont think its the environment she is in. Why cant she be in the same room with you perhaps your sister is moaning or snoring and it is waking her up. I am sorry that you house got damaged. But even more sorry your baby isnt getting sleep. I really hope this information helps.God bless. BTW my son only once fell asleep on his own in his crib he was playing and got really quiet i checked on him and he was out and laying on his toys!!! Each baby is different and some mommas can let there babys cry and not be affected by it. Go get your baby if you want too. When she is two and doing that its a different story but for now go for it.

K.,

If you used to nurse her back to sleep I would still do the same. She is in a different environment and she might just want a little comfort. Changes like this can be hard on us so imagine what a 7 month old is going through.

K., 1st I'm so sorry that you are displaced & your home is in such bad shape. That's awful, I can't imagine what you're going through! Try to make her pack & play more comfy by putting a folded blanket in the bottom for more cushion. Then try to remember, you can't spoil a 7 mo old, but you can create habits. If you nursed her to sleep in your home, maybe this isn't the best time to stop. But, if you stopped a while before Ike, then try giving it some time. My son went through phases of waking in the night. If she's awake & crying for more than 15 mins, go settle her down. If she won't go to sleep after that, give it another 15 mins, go in & settle her, give her a paci, rock her, etc. She's probably just not comfortable with her new surroundings. But if none of that works, she might really be hungry. I always tried everything else 1st & if that didn't work I knew my son was hungry, so I fed him, regardless of the time of day. Good luck!

is there any possible way to get or borrow another crib for your child.You either will be needing to buy a new one or you will be using the one you already have (bring it to your parents house) Mine was in a pack in play for a while too and he did not sleep throught the night in it either. I am sure they are uncomfortable. It took him one week to go back to sleeping through the night and he did not start sleeping throught the night till he was a year old( breastfeed baby).My Dr. gave me the ok to give him Motrin to help with pain. I would call your dr or read your dosage chart they should have given you on your babies weight and age and try out the motrin and or even the tylenol. I just use motrin cause my youngest has had the worst teething problems and it seems to do the best job, also if he wakes in the middle of the night I give him a small dose of tylenol to sooth him back to sleep.Good luck on your choices.

I completely understand. I have been out of my home since Ike. I have a 9 month old who is living in my old room in a pack and play at my parent's house.

At first, it was rough b/c she felt the stress my husband and I had and we both realized it. We finally and quickly had to come to terms that it is what it is and their is nothing we could do about the damage to our house and just wait for the insurance adjuster. Once we relaxed, she relaxed.

My daughter is one that can go down awake and fall asleep but during that time she was not sleeping all that great.

One thing, I would try is a night light. I found while staying in my parents home is that my daughter wakes up in the middle of the night and looks for her pacifier. I guess at home she could find it and put it in her mouth but if the room is too dark she cannot. I am not a big fan of the pacifier and I was planning on taking it away at 8 months but then Ike came. I figured I would go thru the transition once we are back home. She does only get her pacifier in the bed.

Another thing you can try is a sound machine. This will help drown out any noise. My daughter sleeps with hers all the time. I ordered mine from Target online.

Lastly, I would stop nursing at 4 & 5 a.m. I think this is becoming a habit and she will always wake up. I pumped for my daughter so I always knew how much she was getting. Since 4 months, she has had 4 bottles of 8 oz. Her last bottle was at 6:00 p.m. and her first bottle was at 7:30 a.m.

http://www.target.com/Marpac-Dual-Speed-Sound-Machine-980...

teething tablets are awsome or baby tylenol, could she be in pain? Don't worry about spoiling her she is still so little she might just need you right now. I nursed my son throughout the night till he was around 10 months, not the worst thing he eventually grew out of it. Could you set up her crib much more comfy, maybe that would help.

I nursed three children for 18months each. I believe in feeding them whenever they cry. Your baby could be having a growth spurt and needs more. I feed mine night and day just whenever they wanted to. I do not believe in letting them cry like that when they are that young.
Especially if you are at other people's house the crying would disturb everyone. Just meet your baby's needs and not worry about what other people do. Mine all grew up healthy and happy and very well adjusted because they had their physical and emotional needs met.

You cannot "spoil"a baby. Crying is her only way of communicating her needs and what she needs is her mommy to comfort her! If you nurse or rock her you will not spoil her....instead you will be teaching her that she is valued and loved instead of ignored and not important to you. I know it is a difficult situation but sounds like your whole family is suffering and ALL of you need a little reassurance just now. Dont worry about "what your friends do" and do what you truly feel is right and I am sure that will be to comfort your very little lovely baby.

I dont know if this will help you or not, but, my daughter is a good sleeper, has been from the get-go. However, she absolutely will not sleep in a pack-n-play. Could it possibly be that? Maybe some extra cushioning on the bottom might help? I can agree that being in a strange enviroment can be difficult, but I would imagine by now she would be used to it. Have you felt the bottoms of those things? Yikes!! Its like sleeping on an old fold out sofa with a bar in your back!!!

Good Luck!!
Margaret :)

P.S. When my bug was younger, I couldnt live without Hylands Teething Tablets...those may help you also.

Hi K.,
This too shall pass. First, your baby thinks that you and she are one person. She is experiencing seperation anxiety. You will need to acknowledge her personality. A 7 month old does not have the cognitive ability to manipulate and it not possible to spoil your baby by simply responding to her needs. Secondly, forget the pacifier at night. If it falls out, she will cry because she may not be able to find it in her crib. Third, as far as the teething, teething tablets by Hyland. They are homeopathic. I was told that teething pain can be excruciating. Some babies get fever, colds and even diarrhea. Fourth, feel the bottom of the pack n play and make sure it is comfortable. The ones we used were hard as rocks. I laid several thick baby blankets to make it more comfortable. Try massaging your baby while she is awake to reduce her stress level. Also, try putting your baby on her tummy. My first baby was the absolute worst sleeper, and I attribute it to the fact that she was a tummy sleeper. My second and third babies slept like a charm--I put them on their tummy as soon as I got home and have no regrets. Forget what your friends are telling you and just do what you know is right. It is okay to respond to your baby. In addition to teething, there could be several other reasons why she is crying--wet diaper, thirsty, bad dream, etc. Make sure your baby has a full tummy before you put her to sleep at night. One of my favorite books is Super Baby Food by Ruth Yaron. Finally, if none of the above works, your baby may be having a food reaction. I didn't discover my daughter was severly allergic to peanuts until 13 months, and I was eating peanut butter and nursing her. No wonder she cried all the time. I hope this helps. God Bless and Good Luck!

Neither of my boys could be laid in their bed and fall asleep on their own until they were over a year old. I nursed both of them to sleep until they weaned at 13-14 months (I usually walked them to the crib or handed them to hubby so they would wake just a little before laying them down where they would sigh and fall back asleep from 9 months on). I gave up nursing in the middle of the night once they started sleeping thorugh the night but a occasionally they would regress and need a nursing if they were going through a growth spurt, were in a strange place, or had a nightmare. I never let my little one "cry it out" until they were 9 months old when there was a phase of staying awake after the nursing. I would let them go 5 minutes, then check on them, then wait 10 before going back, then 15 and almost never needed a last time. At 7 months and with such a big change combined with teething I think it is perfectly appropriate to "baby" your baby. When visiting relatives on shorter trips in the night my boys sometimes even needed to come in bed with me in the middle of the night just for comfort (sometimes my 3 year old still will on a trip).

Your baby is still young and if giving her comfort helps her sleep, I say do it.

By the way, the only babies I know who go to bed peacefully after being laid in bed are the ones on TV.

I know you have been put in a hard situation being away from home for awhile, but your daughter's weird sleep schedule could be a normal growth spurt, pretty likely for 7 months. She may be hungry in the night again for a few months. Many experts have written that you cannot spoil an infant, so if you want to nurse her or hold her you should. Spoiling kids is about giving them junk they don't need for poor reasons. Holding and comforting a fussy infant is not spoiling her! She's trying to tell you something, so keep listening and trust your Mommy instincts. I've also heard about babies who go to bed awake and magically fall asleep on their own, but I've never actually met one! Certainly never had one in my house! ha ha
So she doesn't think you are there to play I'd keep it dark as possible, talk very little, but do tend to her needs to be fed or patted back to sleep (or whatever you find that works) for now and see it as just another stage in her growth and development. Just when you have it figured out, she'll start doing something else! Don't worry about being a first time mom, I have three and am perplexed almost daily about something. Keeps things interesting tho!
And although I understand you miss your house, she probably hasn't noticed her room is different since what she really cares about is still there for her: YOU! :)
7 months is a great age for looking at things and listening to your voice. I hope you are having fun talking to her and playing simple games. peek-a-boo for the hundredth time?

P. (mom with three boys ages 7,5,& 3)

Dear K.,
My heart goes out to you and your family. You certainly are making the best of a very difficult situation. Please don't be too hard on yourself and don't dwell on regrets about the home you prepared. Your baby's home is wherever you are and she is content as long as you are near.

I am a first-time mother myself and have a soon to be 14-month-old beautiful baby boy who has not slept through the night since I returned to work when he was three months old. I agree with those that have shared their feelings regarding nursing when your baby needs it. I nursed my son when he did not return to sleep soon after waking and he usually fell back asleep after just a few minutes. Only recently have we progressed to either waking only once, or not at all for periods of 6-8 hours and most of the time he does not nurse and can fall back asleep if I hold him for a minute or two. Like your little one, he is teething constantly and has a mouth full of teeth already, so I feel that those times that he wakes and needs a little comfort it is most likely from being in pain. Like you, I have tried to listen to all advice and follow what I have read in books, but I have found that following my heart has worked best. Though it may take a while, I bet that your sweet little girl will work this out all on her own with your support, just like my son has recently. I too have yet to meet the magical baby that you lie down awake and watch drift off to sleep! I read somewhere that babies sometimes wake at night to nurse to reconnect with their mothers and I think that this might be what happened in our case after I returned to work, so perhaps your little girl is just needing some time with you in the midst of all of the changes occurring in your lives recently.
I wish you and your family the best. May you and your little one find your way to a peaceful night's rest.
I wish you and your little one

***ETA I just read the other responses, and you've received lots of the same. But I have to say, I could not have said things better than Cassandra. Please reread her post. She is absolutely right. I am a bit of a breastfeeding "lactivist" so I tend to go on and on, na didn't want to do that to you in your time of struggle. But after reading hers, I just have to tell you she's absolutely right. BF babies ARE different. Heed her advice! She's a smartie! Back to original post:

You are in a tough time right now and I am sorry. But you will not be spoiling her if you help her. She is telling you, "Mommy, I need you." Don't make her CIO in a strange place. Rules on hold: nurse her, rock her, hold her when she wakes at night. This might not be what you do all the time, but for now, DO IT! She feels out of place, and she feels your anxiety as well. She needs extra care right now, not left to cry for up to 45 minutes. Your friends may be able to put their children down wide awake, but they are living in their own homes. ANd besides, ALL babies are DIFFERENT! Mine would NEVER be able to just CIO for 5 minutes and then go to sleep. It's not in their temperament to do that (nor mine).

I always rocked and nursed my son to sleep, and he eventually didn't need that anymore. He decided on his own when he was ready to stop. They do. Your daughter will not need to be rocked and nursed to sleep forever!!! Do it now while she needs you more. You'll both feel a lot better, and you are not spoiling her, unless you think love and attention are spoiling. Some do, but I do not. In any case, she needs extra of it right now while y'all are struggling.

Good luck.

You answered your own question. She is not growing up in her own room in her own house right now. You can work on her schedule then. For now nurse her, rock her, hold her whatever it takes. Her world has been turned upside down as has yours and she can feel that. I have 4 children and owned a home day care for several years and if there is one thing that I have learned it is that no sleep yields no sleep and just continues to spiral. Do your best to help that baby of yours sleep for now. When you get back to your home continue what you were doing and slowly work your way back to a schedule that you would like to see her on. Use some type of noise machine in her room when she gets home that has white noise and the sounds and the smells of happy will help her connect with that noise and it shouldn't be too hard. Good luck!

You are not in your home and everything around your baby changed, so she needs time to adjust. Changes in your regul routine are sometimes really rough on babies.

Yes, I had one of those babies you can lay down awake in bed, add a pacifier, snugglebear and blanket and turn on a lullabye, but I still got him every night to nurse for a long time until he was about 11 months. He is a big guy, so by weight he might not have needed it, but that was not reality. So instead of having him crying all the time, I nursed him and we both fell back asleep in my bed pretty fast.

Don't be so afraid of spoiling her. Teething is really hard on some babies, too, my youngest was just plain miserable.

What is different about her naps now? Is she alone in one room? Is the room dark enough during daytime naps? Does she need some white noise?

First of all I am not one of those women who thinks a baby can be "spoiled." A happy baby is one who feels secure and well-loved, not one who is left alone to cry herself to sleep. I think you are being too hard on her. She may be crying because of real pain too...If it is teething pain you think, give her some Motrin before bed...that will work for at least six hours and you can rule out pain as a problem. Also, make sure she doesn't have an ear infection. There is sometimes no other symptoms, but when the child lays down, the pressure builds up on the ear drum and causes pain. If it is just anxiety, I think you should rock her to sleep, or hold her and feed her. Wrap her snugly in a blanket so she will still have that snug feeling when you put her back in the crib. I used to play switcheroo when mine fell asleep nursing, i would swap the nipple for the pacifier. I would also stand there for a minute and put my hand on the baby's tummy for a minute until I was sure she had made the transition asleep. Anther idea is to try to burp her..she may be having some gas from gulping her bottle and holding it herself. The most impoetant thing is that she needs to know that you are a constant for her even in a strange place.

You are also stressed out and you baby will react to that stress every time. Try to get some time for yourself, get a pedicure or manicure, go out to lunch with your Mom, or take a nice hot bath with relaxing music. Do some yoga or stretching and try to get some exercise into your routine, that will help you alleviate stress too. As soon as you calm down, your baby will too! Blessings to you both.

As a mom of 5 kids, I have noticed that at that age, my babies always wanted to nurse MORE, not less. They do go thru growing pains and get hungry. (ETA: I do nurse on my side in the night b/c I will just fall back asleep and when they are finished they just unlatch and sleep until they are hungry again. There is no crying and they can just nurse until their tummy is content!)

Please don't let her cry for that long. You are teaching her not to trust you. She needs you now more than ever! She, not only is trying to adjust, but her body hasn't stopped changing/growing!! Even now I get hungry in the night and have to get a snack too!

Also, I have heard it said that teething is so painful that if adults went thru it they would need morphine!! Be the loving, compassionate mom that you are and stop worrying about spoiling her. Loving her and meeting her needs are not spoiling!! You'll see that she cries less and less and you can enjoy her more and more.

Blessings,
M.
Mom to 5 Wonderful Kids
www.4MyChildrenSake.com