My 5 Yr Old Wont Sleep in Her Bed!

Updated on March 20, 2009
L.F. asks from Melrose Park, IL
9 answers

Recently I had to spend some time at my Mom's house, while my house was being repaired, and when comming back home my 5 year old daughter refuses to sleep in her bed and screams and says that she is scared. This will go on for hours, even if I stay with her until she falls asleep she will wake up within minutes after I leave crying for me. This is all new behavior to me, since she has never had this kind of issue going to bed. This feeling is not good, any suggestions!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.W.

answers from Chicago on

My 7-year old wouldn't sleep in her bed. So we had fun "dressing up" her bed. We strung white Xmas lights over the canopy. We cleaned underneath so she could see there wasn't anything under there. I started running a fan so there was a little white noise and then added some "sleepy music."

She loves sleeping with the Christmas lights on.

Another friend of mine used her baby monitor on her 5-year old. The 5-year old knew she could call for her at any time and she could hear. The idea was fun, and after a few nights the novelty wore off and she didn't need it anymore.

It's possible if you're firm about her sleeping in her own bed it will go away just as suddenly as it arrived. Kids are strange sometimes!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.G.

answers from Chicago on

We've had different stages with my daughter not staying in bed. For a while, reward/sticker charts worked. First, short charts (3-5 stickers) for a small prize, then larger ones (10-12). However, the novelty of this started to wear off, and we thought it was leading to her only doing stuff for prizes.

After sleeping well for a while, when she was about 4-something, she started giving us more trouble at night and waking us up in the middle of the night. I have to say what worked here was a threat. During a calm time (not in the middle of the night, before bed, or in the morning) I explained that she would get two more chances to stay in bed. The next time she got out, she and I would go to the store and buy a lock (a hook lock?). The next time she got out, we would put the lock on the door and use it. She complained, talked about how she was scared, but I have to say, the problem stopped right then. We never even bought the lock, although I was already mentally prepared to go through with the whole plan. I generally don't believe in threats, but I felt desperate about this issue because I wasn't getting any sleep!

We did also talk about strategies for taking away scary things...we "pick the bad dreams out of the air" before bed, making sure they are all gone. At some point, though, I had to make the call that she was mostly avoiding sleep rather than really being scared.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.K.

answers from Chicago on

After reassuring her and doing a lot of what the other posters have said...what about a reward chart? We have them going for both our daughters. The one wants to go to Chuck E Cheese...no squrit accidents in her pants earns her a sticker..one for morning one for afternoon. The other wants to go bowling. She is trying not to while/cry, which was happening every morning. She can earn up to 4 stickers a day.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.S.

answers from Chicago on

Hi L. ~ We had the same problem w/our almost 6 year old. for six months we walked her back and forth from our bedroom to hers. It was exhausting. Nothing would work. Not even the reward chart that worked for her older sister. So instead, we would just take privilages away from her. for instance, she had a bday party of a friend a few weeks ago and we told her if she did not stay her in bed for 3 nights in a row, she would not be able to go. Then she wanted new crocks. We then told her she would have to stay in her bed 5 days. Each time something would come up that we knew she would like, we would extend the nights in bed. It worked like a charm and she has slept in her bed for a month straight w/out any problems.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Have you talked to her about what she's afraid of?

Try a few of these:

Get a nightlight or turn on her closet light.
Give her a little baseball bat to sleep with...my daughter was scared when she was three and that helped her.
Talk to her about what she is afraid of and try to reason with her.
Also talk to her about your need for sleep and how she's preventing you from sleeping...my oldest felt guilty when I was pregnant and she kept waking me up for silly things like a drink of water.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.G.

answers from Chicago on

Did anything change while you were having the house repaired? Was it something scary that needed to be repaired like a fire or storm damage? I would try addressing any valid concerns she might have. If she is just generally scared maybe you could let her pick out a night light or new blanket or pillow. Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.R.

answers from Chicago on

my 10 year old still has nightmares and comes into our bed...i am ok with it, i remember the bad dreams. for some reason your daughter needs to feel you next to her, this too shall pass and my suggestion is go with it and enjoy the cuddles, they will end someday soon.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

V.C.

answers from Chicago on

My Daughter slept in her own bed for about 6 months ,she is 4 1/2 years old. She has slept with me ever since. If you do not mind it, let her do it. I love to sleep with her, it's great to cuddle and I love to hear her dreams in the morning. However she does fall asleep on her own, I have never stayed untill she falls asleep she needs to be able to soothe herself to sleep so to speak.
She does have a nightlight.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.B.

answers from Springfield on

Hi L.,
Sleeping issues are the worst in my opinion! For whatever reason your daughter has decided she is scared so I would suggest if your room will allow it try putting her mattress on the floor next to your bed. This will help reasure her that you are still there. You could also set up a time frame with her....We will put your mattress here for X number of days and then we will move it over here (maybe foot of the bed) and finally back to your room. It could just be that all of the sudden changes have thrown her for a loop and she became uncomfortable with all the changes.
Best Wishes!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches