My 5-Year-old Son Still Wetting the Bed at Night... What Can We Do?

Updated on February 05, 2009
L.M. asks from San Jose, CA
15 answers

my 5-year-old son still wetting the bed at night sometimes... what can we do? I've heard of some kind of "night devise" that can be attached to wake him up at night... any suggestions?
Thanks in advance.

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H.O.

answers from San Francisco on

My son wet the bed until he was 8yrs old... his pediatrician told me that it can be hereditary (which it was in my case) ... basically the last organ to develop and grow with the body is the bladder... so he's eating and drinking more, but his bladder can't hold more liquids because it hasn't "stretched" yet... he said that you can buy those things but he'll grow out of it... which he did...
Good Luck!

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M.S.

answers from Sacramento on

Boys bladders take longer to "get it". Don't fret, he'll get over it. The most important thing is not to shame him because he wet the bed. Be sure he doesn't drink anything within an hour of going to bed, and make him go pee before he goes to bed.

I think gettting a device would be kind of cruel for him. My son is about to turn 6, and it took him a long time to not pee the bed. The other thing to consider is how much stress there might be in your home. For instance, my son was doing well and then I lost my job in October, and he went back to wetting the bed. It was the stress that he was internalizing that caused him to wet the bed.

The other thing we did, was tell him that his bladder would tell him when it was full and that he had to listen so he could let the pee out. I think it made him feel like he was in control of his body. For whatever reason, he seemed to get it and started getting up to pee in the middle of the night.

Just remember, no boy grows up and still wets his bed. He'll get it. Good luck!

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi L.,

I saw this on-line--the other Mama's are right.

Things that you probably don't talk about with friends:

how you cry when you watch the movie Bambi
the day you accidentally wore your underwear inside out
how you wet the bed when you sleep

Millions of kids and teenagers from every part of the world wet the bed every single night. It's so common that there are probably other kids in your class who do it. Most kids don't tell their friends, so it's easy to feel kind of alone, like you might be the only one on the whole planet who wets the bed. But you are not alone.

The fancy name for bedwetting, or sleep wetting, is nocturnal (nighttime) enuresis (say: en-yoo-ree-sus). Enuresis runs in families. This means that if you urinate, or pee, while you are asleep, there's a good chance that a close relative also did it when he or she was a kid. Just like you may have inherited your mom's blue eyes or your uncle's long legs, you probably inherited bedwetting, too.

The most important thing to remember is that no one wets the bed on purpose. It doesn't mean that you're lazy or a slob. It's something you can't help doing. For some reason, kids who wet the bed are not able to feel that their bladders are full and don't wake up to pee in the toilet. Sometimes a kid who wets the bed will have a realistic dream that he or she is in the bathroom peeing - only to wake up later and discover he or she is all wet.

Many kids who wet the bed are very deep sleepers. Do your parents complain that it's hard to wake you up? Could you sleep through a marching band parading outside your bedroom door? Or a pack of dogs howling at the moon? Trying to wake up someone who wets the bed is often like trying to wake a log - they just stay asleep.

Some kids who wet the bed do it every single night. Others wet some nights and are dry on others. A lot of kids say that they seem to be drier when they sleep at a friend's or a relative's house. That's because kids who are anxious about wetting the bed may not sleep much or only very lightly. So the brain may be thinking, "Hey, you! Don't wet someone else's bed!" This can help you stay dry even if you're not aware of it.

Good News
The good news is that almost all kids who wet the bed eventually stop. So if you wet every night, don't be discouraged. And don't worry that you're not normal, either physically or emotionally. Sleep wetting is not usually caused by a problem with your body or your feelings.

It's likely that bedwetting will go away on its own. In fact, 15 out of 100 kids who wet the bed will stop every year without any treatment at all. But if you have this problem it's still a good idea for you and your parents to talk to your doctor about it.

Your doctor will ask you some questions, and it's important to answer them truthfully and not feel embarrassed. Remember, bedwetting is so common that your doctor probably treats a lot of kids who do it. The doctor will examine you and probably ask for a urine sample to test. Some kids who have other problems, like constipation (when you aren't pooping regularly), daytime wetting, or urinary infections, may need some extra tests.

More Good News
If you wet the bed, there are some things you can do to stay dry. Try not to drink anything after dinner and remember to go to the bathroom before going to bed. If you do wet the bed, help with the cleanup by pulling off the sheets and putting them in the laundry.

A lot of doctors think that the best treatment for enuresis is a program that retrains your brain to do one of two things:

wake you up so you can go to the bathroom
stay asleep and hold it until morning
This program includes doing bladder exercises, such as waiting a little longer to pee during the day, reading about and imagining staying dry, or even using a tiny alarm. The alarm is connected to a pad placed in your underwear at night. If you start to urinate, the pad senses the moisture and sets off the alarm. Different alarms buzz, vibrate, or do both, but they're all easy to use and can help wake even the deepest sleeper.

There are medicines for kids who wet the bed. They might help you temporarily, but they don't cure bedwetting. These medicines work best when combined with the alarm or other training programs.

It may take some practice to retrain your brain, and you'll need to be patient. But eventually, you will stop wetting the bed.

Blessings.....

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C.C.

answers from Fresno on

My daughter was nearly 5 when she finally stopped wetting the bed. Before that, I took her to the doctor to be sure nothing was wrong, and he said that it is actually pretty common and there is nothing the child can really do to control it. Their bladder hasn't grown as fast as the rest of them, and/or there is some enzyme the brain is not producing sufficiently to tell the body to stop producing urine at night. He said that most kids grow out of it by the time they are 8 or so. Also, it tends to run in families (my husband remembers being a bed wetter until he was in third grade). We just kept her in pull-ups at night until she grew out of it. Incidentally, her cousin (who is now 6) is still in pull-ups at night - his doctor said the same thing.

I know it is frustrating, but hang in there. He will grow out of it. Good luck!

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C.H.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi L.,

We went thru this too and I can tell you that it's probably nothing you are doing wrong or anything your son is doing wrong. Boys have a hormone that kicks in that allows them to control the bladder overnight...only it kicks in on their schedule, not ours. Our son had issues till he was almost 7. We used pullups and just took him to the bathroom before he went to bed and then again when we went to bed a few hours later. This really helped. In time he just grew out of it and now at almost 8 he's not had a wet night in over a year. Just be patient...it takes some boys longer than others for that hormone to kick in!

C.

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R.C.

answers from Sacramento on

My son went through the same thing. We saw a pediatrician who explained to us that kids get a hormone that triggers their body to produce less urine at night and that this hormone comes between ages 2 and 8 and is different for every child. I thought my son would be in pull-ups forever it seemed, but when he turned 7 suddenly it stopped. It was hard; my son was getting really frustrated and embarassed the older he got and I kept reassuring him that his body was just working at its own pace. It just stopped so suddenly that it did seem to fit the idea that a hormone just kicked in and caused a change. Be patient; I feel like those devices are startling and it won't change the hormone factor just cause the child to be a lighter sleeper maybe. Good luck.

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G.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Magnesium deficiency. Start giving fulvic acid.(For the easily absorbed magnesium.)

To much dairy is targeted as a problem in bed wetting, most likely because magnesium and calcium compete. So a diet high in calcium will deplete magnesium.

Fulvic acid has traces of both calcium and magnesium.These minerals need to be given in balanced amounts in the body so that neither one causes a depletion of the other.

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J.L.

answers from Fresno on

www.thebedwettingstore.com

We got the night alarm/buzzer for my now 8 year old son. You can use just the buzzer, or the buzzer and alarm. The alarm is rather annoying and if you startle easy, I would not recommend using that setting! We started when he was 7 and at first we didn't see any results, other than it woke him up AFTER he pee'd! The good part, I was able to pinpoint exactly when he was peeing in his sleep. We only used it for about a month and a half. Now, every night at 10:45, I get him out of bed and sit him on the pot to pee. We have not had a wet night since.

My daughter, who is 5, has tried only a couple of times because it scared her too much! We are still working on her night time peeing. I figured this was a better way than doing medications, and eventually they will grow out of it. Both of my kids are very sound sleepers. My son never remembers me getting him out of bed and walking him to the bathroom!

Good luck, and have patience!

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T.H.

answers from San Francisco on

His bladder/nervous system are a little slower to mature than other kids. Did you or his father have this problem when you were young? It is usually a genetic problem passed on to your kids. Is he very distressed by it? If you handle it in a calm, non-emotional way, without shaming him, he won't get too upset about it. Get a rubber sheet to protect the mattress and relax.You can always use pull ups. He'll grow out of it eventually. If he is very upset about it you could get a bell/pad system that will awaken him at night when he stats to wet. Good luck.

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A.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Get the Wetstop alarm system. Affordable and effective.

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W.O.

answers from San Francisco on

My 8.5 year old is still wetting his bed. We have taken him to the the ciropractor and had months of sucess with one adjustment. But the last adjustments we tried did not have enough success for the money. Pull ups are cheeper. Plus, he loves to climb trees. When he jumps down out of the tree I think that messes up his adjustment. The first time the adjustment "wore off" he was playing soccer and falling alot. If we could afford to go regularlly, I would so take him. He really wants to have sleepovers and not feel so bad about it. I too wet my bed for a long time so I annticipate this could be an issue for a while. If he gets any bigger we might have to look into depends.

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L.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi L.,

My daughter is 6 and we have discovered when she was wetting (between 10:30 and 10:45 pm), and now every night, we take her to the potty. I trained her from the beginning to sleep through anything, and well, now it is biting me back, LOL. She sleeps so soundly, she doesnt realize she needs to go. I think it is something that she will eventually outgrow, as more nights then not, she barely goes when we take her and is dry in the morning.

We talked to the dr and she ruled out any infections, etc and told us for some kids, it is normal. We have a mattress protecter on and I just have to wash sheets more than normal.

Good luck!

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K.W.

answers from San Francisco on

He might just grow out of it, but it not and if you want more information look at nobedwetting.com. He might just be a sound sleeper that does not do the regular REM sleep like the rest of us. You might look for the symptoms they talk about. It is very expensive if you do the program, but they do use the device but you have to be the one that wakes him up when the alarm goes off because if he has this sleep problem he won't wake up, but may act awake, but still be asleep. Good luck.

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N.C.

answers from Sacramento on

My nephew who is 7, still wears night pants. He sleeps so soundly he doesn't feel that he has to go to the bathroom. If he does wet the bed, he doesn't even feel it. I would go to the Dr. and make sure it is not a physical thing, and if not he will out grow it. Put him in night pants (pull-ups) so he is comfortable and if it is occassionally, not a big deal at all. Don't worry about it and don't make a big deal of it. Getting a device may make him self-conscious. I would wait and see. Good luck

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J.E.

answers from San Francisco on

My son wet the bed until he was 9. One day, he stopped and that was the end of it. You can get coupons for pull-ups at Huggies.com and probably pampers too. Don't make a big deal about it, your son can't help it. My husband and I both remember wetting the bed as kids. My daughter was dry through the night before she was two. Go figure. Everyone is different.

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