Hello. I have a four year old daughter who for her entire life has been a very independant child. She would go with other people and even stay the night without a problem. She spends alot of time with other family members, and has never had what I guess we would call an attatchment issue with me. Within the last 2 weeks she has turned into a completly different kid. She has been getting in trouble in preschool, she doesnt want to take naps, or go to bed at night EVER anymore. When her and her father drop me off for work in the morning, she crys and crys and doesnt want me to go. Normally she barly notices when i am gone anywhere. I dont understand what is going on with her, and I am really starting to worry. She is so oversensitive about everything, especially doing with me. Has anyone ever had a problem sounding anything like this? Any advice on what to do, because it breaks my heart to see her so sad. Thank you.
Thank you all for your responses. She did recently have one of her teachers move to a different school, but that was over a month ago. She was very upset about it for about 3 days, then she got over it. I know she still misses her, but she doesnt talk about it a whole lot anymore. I dont think it is because of her baby sister (who is now 6 months) When she was born, my daughter wasnt bad, but would act out and do strange things like pee in buckets all over the house instead of the toilet. I do as best as I can to spend "alone" time with each of my girls. I asked her teacher about things at school, and she was very vauge about it. I asked my daughter what was going on with her ( we talk about her day everyday, and talk about other things all of the time) and she said she says she just misses me. She also told me she didnt want to take naps anymore. I think it is because the older kids in her school do not have to take naps anymore. She is terrible when she doenst nap or get enough sleep though, so i am not a big fan of that. I will talk to her teacher more, and get her to tell me what is going on at school ( hopefully) Thank you again for your help :)
My fisrt thoughts were the same as Andrea's. God forbid this but I wonder if she has been touched or harmed in some way. I hope this is not the case, but her behavior sounds very peculiar since you said she was very independent before. I would try to remember when she was in someone else's care and explore what happened during that time.
I have had quite a bit of experience with children birth through five since I have my BS in early childhood education and have been running an early care and education program in my home for the last 12 years. What you're describing here isn't typical. My guess is that something your daughter experienced has caused this change, something that your daughter perceives as a negative and frightening experience. And I say perceived, because at this age, it could be as simple as something she heard people talking about that she didn't understand that is provoking this fear. On the other, it could be something that would be frightening to anyone. Do you know of anything? If not, it would be worth your while to do some investigating to see what's at the bottom of this. If you live in Hanover Township, they have an excellent youth and family services program, which is on a sliding payment scale. I think it would be worth your while to talk to someone there and get their perspective on this.
K.
The first thing that popped into my head was that she might of been abused. I'm not any kind of expert or anything like that but I certainly would not take any chances with my daughter. I would seek out some kind of help, immediately and also talk to your duaghter one-on-one. I really don't think that it has anything to do with your new 5 month old daughter. If it did, I figured she would of reacted like this right after she was born, but your baby is now 5 months, so I don't think this is it. Something could of happened at school. Talk to her teachers and see if they've noticed anything. At the very least, they may be able to direct you to some kind of children counselor who may help you figure out whats going on. Good luck and I sincerely hope it is nothing serious.
Yeah, maybe a belated response to her baby sister. Were there any changes in school? new teacher or classroom? I find that my son REALLY acts out when there are big changes, like when he started preschool. It eventually gets better and he moves into a new phase.
I'm so sorry, cuz i know how heart breaking it can be when you're child is having difficulty or seems unhappy. Any chance you could spend some one on one time w/her and have some bonding time together? OR even just sit and play w/her or read to her during your babies entire nap time? That may feel therapeutic for the both of you.
Do you think it is a reaction to her new little baby sister? She had you to herself for 4 yrs before her sibling arrived so it is a very common reaction. Have there been any other changes, such as with the preschool class, teachers, etc?
