My 3Yr Old Son Pooped in His Room Today, He Has NEVER Done This Before.

Hi Lei,
Your son is just getting familiar with his body parts and theirs functions. It is a whole new big world for him and there are so many things there to be discovered and so many limits to be checked, and so many borders to be pushed. Plus about this age the testosterone is starting to hit and than you end up not knowing who you are dealing with. But this is a different story... Now about the poop. Try to think from his perspective - if he sits down for 5 min and draws a picture, doesn't matter how bad it is, you do get excited, you are telling him "good job", you are so proud with him, you hang it on the refrigerator, you are showing it to all the family members, even the dog and the cat, and it is such a big deal and one way or another he gets rewarded for that! In short - he produced something and it looks like everybody is very happy about it! And than he knows what you are expecting him to do in the potty, and he sits down and work hard for 5 min and you probably make funny faces because of the smell and than simply flush "his production" in the toilet. This is the part he doesn't understand and he needs you to help him understand it. In his world everything he does should be a big deal and you need to acknowledge it and price him. Next time he does it somewhere else, do not make a big deal out of it, because he might learn that it could be one of the ways to get mommy's attention, even if it is negative, they love it anyway! Simply say something like: "I saw you pooped in your bag. We don't do that. We poop in the potty! May be next time you should try to do it there." And when he goes and poops in the potty make a big deal out of it. And don't be in a rush to flush it down. Talk about it, sing a "bye-bye, poo-poo" song or anything, just let him know that you know he worked hard on this "project" too and he did a good job! I hope I was helpful. Let me know if you need to know more. Good luck!

When my nephew was small, he pooped in the back of his toy "dump" truck.

L. - I don't know what it is about little boys, but I hear stories about this very often. My son did this when he was 5 years old. I could tell you several strange stories about it - it eventually stopped when he was taught how to clean up everything himself. He had the "green" bucket and a step by step procedure to clean and sanitize the situation.
After about 3-4 more events -- it stopped. Little boys just do not like to take the time to use the toilet. You are not alone in your quest to raise a little boy. My son is turning 14 this month, and he doesn't remember doing this at all --- somehow we made it through all that. You will too!
Good luck.

Every time I take the kids to the Drs. they ask if there has been any changes in the household- divorce, a move or death in the family. Any major changes like that usually have an effect on the kids.
My mom is making a move this week to another state (after living in the same place all of her life) and she actually snapped at me for the first time! Can you imagine what it would be like for a little person that has no say in where he lives feels? People deal with change and stress in different ways.
I don't know what you can do about it- I hope the other ladies can help!

Hello L.,

My first reaction when I read your letter was that something might have happened to him or in his presence that he is trying to deal with--something out of the normal activities in his life. But it could be just a coincidence about the two incidents happening at the same time, too. Sometimes kids will do something crazy when they are scared and I wonder if he was just a little scared because his poop was stuck. Maybe he just didn't want to use the toilet to fix this problem. When my daughter was about 3-4, she started peeing again in her pants and she knew better and it was all for nothing! She started using the toilet again when her sister started to use the toilet. She also pooped on the porch and thought it was funny once--and for no reason at all. But my brother when he was about 3-4 started wetting his pants, too, and we had a bad step-father during that time. I guess just make sure you continue to keep your home safe, stable and loving for him and keep your eye out for any red flags--more odd behavior. And make sure the people involved in his life are safe people for him.

Ah,ha... moving that is the key.. they get unsettled and have to test all the limits again. keep consistant and it should pass.. good luck

Yes it is normal for kids to degress or lashout when there is a change. I wouldnt worry to much about one incident, but yes he should be disaplined. I would try to give him a little bit more special time to help with the adjustment of moving, and reassure that he is loved. Kids do crazy things but as long as he knows he did wrong that is a good thing. Maybe he is trying the limits in a new surrounding. It is hard to tell with little ones.