My 11 Month Old Still Waking 5-6 Times a Night

Updated on March 17, 2009
A.U. asks from Oxford, NY
4 answers

My son has started waking up many times all night since he was 4 months. He was getting up every 30 - 60 min. I have him on reflux medication. That was one problem. We have music and a night light. I've done all the usual. I've read the no cry sleep solution. He gets up now about every 2hrs. I'm just exhausted. I haven't slept 4hrs in a row in a year. I have been breastfeeding him at night because I'm so tired and it's the only thing to get him to stop crying and go to sleep. He recently started wanting to feed on my non stop at night and I don't want that. So I realized I need to cut out the night feeding. I tried this last night. I think I fed him maybe twice. I used to feed him to get him to sleep and I realized I also need to stop that. I just started that today. I guess I'm just anxious because I've come up with ideas before and they never work. I'm running out of ideas and I'm so tired. Reading the "No cry sleep solution" helped me get him to nap so I can rest during the day. I'm just so baffled. I don't know why he won't sleep. He's got to be tired. Sometimes I will wake up just before he does. I have a baby monitor with video. He will be absolutely passed out asleep. All of a sudden he jumps up and is screaming. Something must scare him or happen. Why would he just all of a sudden get up? He will not put himself back to sleep at all. He gets so upset he starts shaking. I just want something to work.

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D.S.

answers from New York on

A.,

Is it possible that he is getting a gas pain? I would check with the doctor and make sure the medicine is still working for his tummy problems or maybe he needs something else to settle his stomach. If you say he is sound asleep and jumping up it sounds like he is getting a pain. Stomach gas can be very painful. I would try to cut out the night feedings because if he does have gas feeding him all night is only going to make him worse. Does he take a pacifier? I know they can be a pain but they saved me when my daughter was colicky. She would do the same thing at night and I could just give her the pacifier and she would go right back to sleep. Is he eating three meals a day? If he is eating enough during the day then he shouldn't need to feed at night. He is probably just using you to soothe himself back to sleep because he doesn't know how to do it on his own. I am not sure if you are open to letting him learn to self soothe but I did it when my daughter was a year old because I did not know what sleep was. I was a walking zombie so I was desperate. It is extremely difficult to listen to but it does work. It took three nights and she was sleeping through the night. I would just put her in her crib say night night, put music on and leave. I would go in every 5 to ten minutes lay her back down (because she was standing by that point) tell her night night and leave the room. She would scream louder but by going in I wanted to show her I didn't abandoned her. I would go in again after 5 minutes or so and just repeat the process until she went to sleep. The first night it went on for about 45 minutes (it was very difficult). The next night maybe 30 minutes, the third night 15 and night four no crying at all. I did it at naps as well so I could be consistent with sleep and it also did speed up the process. I know you are going to get mom's who tell you it is harmful or cruel and trust me it is not. My kids are now 24 and 19 and I did it with both of them. I also own a childcare center and have helped moms with sleep training hundreds of times. I think teaching our children to rely on themselves for comfort is the best gift you can give to them and to your family. Taking care of yourself is equally important. A well rested mommy is a happy and productive mommy. This of course is a personal decision that should be made by you and your husband together and it also depends on how desperate you are for sleep. Good luck I hope you get some rest soon!!!!

1 mom found this helpful
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H.G.

answers from New York on

I highly recommend Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy child." I also think it may help to actually get rid of the night light and music!

I'm sorry, I know this is not what you want to hear. But I think it's time for him to learn to soothe himself to sleep. I truly believe it's more stressful for an older baby to NOT know how to go to sleep (and stay asleep) on his own, versus having to cry and fuss at times to figure it out. Weissbluth is a sleep expert who really understands how hard it is for us moms to do this. Nobody can listen to her baby cry without feeling guilty and sad! But he gives multiple options, including staying in the room and using various soothing methods.

You need to sleep, and so does your baby. Neither of you will be healthy without sleep, and your baby will be happier and smarter when he's well rested! I read and tried the No Cry Sleep Solution. It didn't work for my son at all. And I'm a big believer in attachment parenting! My son has been an incredible sleeper since 6 months. 12 hour nights without waking up (unless there's a tooth, illness, or major milestone), and 2-3 (now just 2) long naps a day. Learning to soothe himself to sleep was the key.

Read and try Dr. Weissbluth's method! Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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D.R.

answers from New York on

A., i was where you are, and i am so sorry for you, i understand. by the time my youngest son was 10 mos old, he never slept more than a half hour at a time, for a total of maybe 5 hours or so in a 24 hr day. it was horrible. i was taking him out when he cried, like i always had, so he fully and rightfully so expected it every time he woke up (which they do fairly often, its normal) the whole family was miserable, and of course he wasnt getting the sleep he needed for growth and brain development. now, i must tell you that he is my 3rd child. i NEVER let the first 2 cry in the crib. i always took them out, nursed them, co-slept, whatever they needed, i believed letting them cry it out was wrong and cruel. i still do, really. but in reality, i had no choice. sleeping in my bed just wasnt an option, the other 2 kids were in and out of my bed all night, the baby was rolling all over the place, and me and my husband were so exhausted that we slept like the dead when we did sleep, it was simply way too dangerous. so i let him cry. it was awful, really. a torturous 40 min. but i will tell you that it took 2 or 3 nights and now he sleeeeeeps. i am able to sleep more now than i have in 7 years. and he is happy and healthy and wonderful. he will still protest when i put him in the crib sometimes, but only for a minute or 2. i was never able to put my other 2 kids to sleep awake, thats what happens when you breastfeed, you know? but i can with him. and he is as cuddly and lovey as the other 2, if not more so, and he is also able to leave me without a problem, etc.. no attachment/fear of abandonment issues.... as long as you know your son is healthy and there are no medical issues, you might have no choice. oh, and by the way, you cant do it halfway, so dont bother if you cant stick to it. if you let him cry a while and then go rescue him, you are only teaching him to stick with it and keep crying, kwim? not to say that still, if he cries sometimes and he sounds like something is really wrong, i will go in for him. maybe he has a dirty diaper or whatever. you can tell the difference between the cries. ....he needs to sleep, and so do you,,,, real and prolonged lack of sleep can do more damage than you might think. oh, and by the way, a noise machine or something is a big help. i have noisy neighbors and i run an air purifier in the babys room and it helps for when he wakes up during the night. by the way, it is normal for them to wake up during the night, we all do, we just know how to go back to sleep and the babies dont yet... mine does now, he just woke up an hour ago, whined for a minute, and went back. ahhhhhh. and he naps! they are short, but he goes in with no problem and is much happier for it. i wish you the best of luck. it truly took me about a month or so of sleeping before one day i just said OH this is what i am supposed to feel like! you function on so little sleep, you lose sight of how you are supposed to feel. and it takes a little while for the fog to really lift, which just goes to show the damage we are doing by not sleeping, and for the babes too. take care, D.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Syracuse on

Get a white noise machine, or a humidifier that can be run even without water. The sound from that will block all the other sounds in the house, and it could help him sleep better. My little ones have a cool mist humidifier in their room, and it's turned on every night, usually with no water in it. The sound of the fan blocks out nearly every noise in the house. The walls are thin, and we have 2 older children as well, so blocking out noise is good! Try it. The humidifer I have cost less then $30 at Walmart. It's the kind that has a removable tank, and a filter with a fan. No parts that have to have water to work. Good luck getting some sleep for yourself!!

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