Moving and Starting a New School

Updated on May 18, 2008
R.Y. asks from Ballwin, MO
10 answers

I have a 5 y/o, 4y/o, and an 8month old--all girls. We are hoping to move this summer (as our house has been on the market since Jan.)in time for my older daughters to start school. I am most worried about my oldest, she is already extremely apprehensive about kindergarten. She has enjoyed three years of preschool and has many friends but they will all be going to different schools. She is slow to warm up in new situations and w/ new people. She doesn't like change (like her father!) and I think the new house an new school might be too much for her since they are happening at about the same time (even though we tried to move months in advance of her starting school). My husband and I have openly discussed these changes and we are trying to prepare her as well as we can. Any advice on how to make this transition as esay as possible would be helpful. Can anyone who has been through this weigh in? Thanks!

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J.S.

answers from Springfield on

We moved about 2 weeks after my daughter started kindergarten, but were able to enroll her in the new school district so that she didn't have to change schools after only two weeks. You would be surprised how well kids can handle new things when we worry they won't do so well. The same thing happened the next year, just prior to my son starting kindergarten. I worried about changing schools for my daughter after only one year, and such a big transition for my son as well just prior to starting kindergarten, but he also did amazingly well. My best advice is, if you know the school she will be attending, go visit it a couple of times with her. She can get a feel for it before kindergarten orientation (where they will also show the kids around the school when they meet their teacher), and over the summer, you can take her to the school playground to play once in awhile. She'll may get excited to know that soon she'll be playing at that playground every day, she'll feel a bit more confident if she's got an idea of what the school is like first, and she'll be a bit more familiar with her surroundings. Also, find some things in the vicinity of where you plan to move and show her around so she'll be a bit more accostomed to her new neighborhood when you do move. It'll put your mind at ease some also not having to worry as much over your little girls going through such a big change because they will be more prepared for it and looking forward to it. Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful
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C.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Cudos to you! Girls are such a blessing.Go to the library, Daycare,neighbors,preschool, make up some posters and invite girls to a " bake a cookie day", Lets share "Hand me down's"
or even "Plant a Flower Day" Something inexpensive yet geared for children and you will find loads of people with your same interest looking for other revenues for their children also.....As a bonus new friends for both! LOL C. B.

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T.R.

answers from Joplin on

make a goodbye and hello book! take lots of pictures of her old school, house, and neighborhood, and then lots of the same pictures in her new ones. make two separate books and read them at bedtime...she can say "goodbye" to her old place and "hello" to her new one months in advance. good luck!

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K.W.

answers from St. Louis on

My poor son went to three different kindergartens, due to us moving to AZ in Jan, being in a temp living situation, then closing on our house. As if that wasn't enough we moved him to a new school for first grade, then in Aug we moved here to ST. Louis. My son is now 8 an he is extremly smart, but not very outgoing so I was really worried but he did great. Now he is excited that next year he will be in the same school, but always says "when we move.." like it could happen at any time. I would say, focus on the positive, make it all sound like a big adventure and try not to excuse any behavior that you wouldn't normally accept. She'll be ok!

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N.R.

answers from St. Louis on

My son attends a wonderful preschool program. They have a lot of children that are leaving preschool and going onto kindergarden. They sent home a flyer and said the best way to handle the change is not to make a big deal about it. Kids typically bounce back with change a lot better than us as adults give them credit for. Your daughter might start to feel a little anxious about it because she is picking it up from you. Take her for a tour of the new school, perhaps try to find another little girl in your new neighborhood that is the same age and just be calm about it. We moved from St. Charles to Warrenton last year and my daughters adapted really.
Goodluck selling your house.
N.

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S.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Do you know where you are moving to? If so could you put her in a summer program that is fun so that she can meet a few of the kids that will be going to kindergarten with her. Also check the school that they will be going to, to see if they have a kindergarten orientation so that she can meet her teacher and see the classroom. That really help our daughter when going to kindergarten.

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H.H.

answers from Kansas City on

All I can say is that we just did this and everything worked out just fine. Not only did we move 13 hours away from the only friends my kids ever had....we started school this year in one district and had to move again after Thanksgiving when we were able to move into our new home. I would just bawl everytime I talked to someone about my kids having to go through all this change. Everyone kept telling me, kids are resiliant and they will be fine and of course I didn't believe them. But, they were right. I'm not saying there weren't hard days or that everything was just smooth as silk, but kids do adapt much more easily than adults do and I was projecting my own feelings onto my kids. They have been in their newest school for about 6 months now and they are totally adjusted. My youngest is in kindergarten too, so imagine how I felt knowing his first year would be spent in two different schools. Big School is an adjustment all it's own and she will be figuring out how she fits into this new environment. I'm sure she knows how much you love and support her and she will find her way easier than you think.

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J.N.

answers from St. Louis on

My daughter is very shy and was having trouble making friends in preschool. So when kindergarten was going to start, I got a class list and called all the parents with girls and set up a playdate. I did it individually though, not as a big group. I thought if my daughter had a chance to meet them first before they met each other she might have a better chance of making a connection and having a friend before they all form other bonds. This might be a way for your daughter to not feel so apprehensive about her first day of school as well. Then she will already know someone or many someones. Good luck.

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K.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi, R.. We moved back to my hometown with my son and daughter when they were 6 and 1. I thought it would be an easy transition, but it wasn't at all. My 6 year old son had a difficult time. He has a hard time socializing also. I did think it helped that I went into the school before school started, and the secretary gave us a tour of the school and the first grade classrooms. Then, my son was at least familiar with the school building. You could go play up at the school also, just to get her used to the playground. I think putting your daughter in Girl Scouts or something other girls in her new class might be in would be good too. Let your daughter make her new room her own, so it is a fun experience for her too. I think you should take your daughters fears seriously, because I don't think I took my son's seriously enough, and that I am sure did not help. We were all excited we were going to be back with all our family, and did not realize the old city was all he ever knew. Sometimes, it is hard to look at things from their perspective. Remind her that she can send pics to her friends of her new school and email them. My prayers are with you at this difficult transition. Good Luck. K.

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C.S.

answers from Springfield on

I am a product of moving around child. My parents moved about every two years of my life. Please tell her it is a great new adventure with new ideas and mysteries. She is a very special person with a new special calling to be friends with others. If something does bather her it is ok to tell mom and dad. Because we are here on Earth to learn and grow. There are new golden adventures awaiting for us. Good luck and have a Great smile-ly day.

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