Moms with 3 or More Kids (Boys & Girls).. Dilemma!!

The only advice I have is to (at this age), forget ages and genders and do what's best for each individual kid. And sometimes there is no perfect arrangement, and you just have to work with what you've got!

Could be your over analyzing this! We have 4 (9G, 6B, 3B, and 10 month G)... Attitudes pop up, behaviours pop up, things start suddenly and in full force.
My kids have a pretty drama/stress free life. But they are still kids so they try to whine, complain, blame shift, cry about nothing, etc. They are learning what is socially acceptable and they are using us parents as guinea pigs... Yeah, annoying... But we did it to our parents too...

TALK to him. Ask him about the behaviour. WHY? Ask WHO he has seen behaving this way? We always tell our kids that yes, they may see/ hear OTHER people doing something... But it is NOT acceptable in our house or with US. Its how they start to learn self control.

You do not say WHAT the behaviour is... and there is a HUGE list that can be deemed as "behavioural issues"... Main thing is BE CALM, BE CONSISTENT, BE A CORRECTOR AND COMFORTER.

I only have one BUT i come from a family 4 kids, myself and 3 younger brothers... the rule ALWAYS is boys go together and that left me with my own room. My brothers had very different personalities but my parents did the best to show that just because they are different does not mean you need to always be fighting. Need to learn respect for each other, then when moved into a bigger house my oldest brother got his own room and the two youngest boys shared, that helped a lot during the teenage years. My parents were strong in that girls and boys need own room for privacy issues.

Also ALL of us kids went to bed at the same time, and I was 8 years older then my youngest brother but still had to go to bed by 8pm just like the youngest. I think that your oldest might be jealous that the YOUNGER kids get to stay up later then him, usually the youngest go to bed first and the oldest to bed last. This is why my parents put all of us to bed at the same time, we started to get ready for bed at 7:30pm, in bed by 8pm.

Yes the changes in the past few weeks could be playing in to it BUT from my experiance growing up if one kid got to go to bed later ALL of us were upset by it (I a little less since I had my own room). So to me it seems that the oldest might feel slighted that he has to go to bed and hour before his younger brother... and for the small fact that your youngest does not know how to sleep in, that does not make sense to a 6 year old, it just seems unfair to him and that he is doing something wrong for going to bed so much earlier then the youngest.

I think you need to let it be, moving again can just create more issues for one or all the kids.

I have 3 kids -- 9yo boy, almost 6yo girl, 2yo boy. Right now the older two are still sharing a room -- they have since my daughter moved from our room into her own bed a little before turning 3. We're planning on moving my oldest (boy) out of there and into his own room soon -- over the summer at the latest -- figuring he's going to middle school next year and it's no longer appropriate for him to share a room with his sister. At that point, the little one (boy, will be about 2 1/2) will move in with her. When she enters middle school (or possibly before, depending on her development) she'll also get her own room, and we'll lose our study. I feel that as long as no one has begun to enter puberty, physically or emotionally, mixed gender rooms are fine. You do need to keep a close eye on when that begins to develop though. Just my 2c.

Sorry that I don't have a real solution for you, but we're getting ready to move and here's what we're doing (at least trying) with our four kids:

Girl-7: gets her own room with a bed on top/desk on bottom set.
Girl-4- gets her own room because she's almost three years younger than big sis. She'll have a bunk bed in her room.
Boy-2 and boy 3 months: will share a room.

Everyone starts going to bed at 8 and try to have everyone asleep by 9. $-year old is growing out of naps, so if she happens to have had one that day, she will not sleep until 11. In the morning, I make sure everyone is up by 7:45 and we leave at 8:40.

Right now the boys go bed just fine (I've got them trained), but the girls often end up coming and getting dad and sleeping in guest bed (it was his job to put them to bed and has a bad habit of reading while he's sitting with them waiting for them to go to sleep, so they attach to him when they get up at night.)This is irritating to me, but it's my husband's job and I don't complain anymore because I am not going to be the one to fix it---I'm too busy!

I wonder if your situation wouldn't be different if you put the kids to bed at the same time. It almost seems cruel that the oldest has to go to bed first - especially if his little brother gets to stay up later. Ouch. Alter that and maybe you won't have so many behavioral problems.

Sounds like you have a lot of nervous energy. You need to relax. Kids pick up on this stress and act out in different ways. Just try to enjoy your new home and your family.

I know when my kids were younger, we lived in a three bedroom house. We put the oldest in his own room and the younger two together. Then we had number 4 and we kept 3 in the bigger room and one was in a crib. We let the oldest continue to have his room. Then we moved and my daughter and the oldest had their own rooms. The two younger boys shared a room for a while until the older one went to college. (There was 10 years between Numbers 1 and 2) I think you should do whatever works for your family.

I would play it out. Otherwise, you will switch them now just to need to switch them again later.

My kids are boy - 6, girl - 4 in may, and boy 2 1/2. My boys have shared a room since the youngest came home from the hospital. It has always worked fine, we set clothes out in my room for school the morning before, when he gets up we close the bedroom door so our youngest stays asleep. On the weekends my oldest gets up and goes downstairs, turns on cartoons and plays with his matchbox cars! It has never been an issue for us, I am so glad I had the room situation settled from day 1. Just stick it out and let them settle!

Each of the five children had their own room.

Honey, you have a lot on your plate.

Try letting things go this weekend. Eat take-out. Let everyone stay in their jammies if they're not going out. Try to set everything aside. Blow bubbles in the house. Break out a new box of crayons or a new tub of Playdough. Make English muffin pizzas for dinner -- or pancakes! Laugh. Hug each other.

Allow yourself and your kids to just BE.

Breathe. This, too, shall pass.

Stick to your routine.
Your stressed, he's stressed, Dad's stressed, everyones stressed.
In a few weeks it will calm down.
Moving is a huge upheaval in a child's life. You have essentioally moved three times in 5 months. Into the new house, out of the new house into aunt's, into the new house.
Be consistent with discipline, bedtime routines etc. He will get back on trrack.
And I would keep the boys together.

I have 4 kids, the oldest a boy and 3 girls. So of course the oldest has almost always had his own room (since he was 2) The we had the girls share. When I had my youngest girl, the oldest girl moved into her own room. Now my 2 youngest share a room and always have and both of them hate being alone (which if they don't go to bed nicely I separate them until they fall asleep - By putting somebody to sleep in big brothers room and then moving them after they are asleep.) And yes sometime one keeps the other awake or wakes the other up but they are really close and are very good friends which I love to see.

Unless there is some other arrangement you can have in your house I would keep it the same. My oldest daughter is a teen and she feels much older than her little sisters but sometime I can tell she is jealous of their closeness...which I think is in part b/c they share a room.

I think your oldest needs his own room.