Mom with Baby Who Has Terrible Night Tremors

I don't have any advice but poor baby. I think it's terrible for her to have nightmares so young. I'd ask my doctor again, or get a referral to someone who knows about these things. Good luck. I hope she feels better and sleeps better soon.

My daughter also suffered from night terrors for a year straight. I went and saw a anthroposophical doctor, he prescribed remedies and I had to change my daughters diet. 3 days later she never had one again!!! It has now been 6 years of no terrors!!!

Good luck!
A.

What a frightening thing to go through for your family. I would check with a family counselor. Many are trained in specific techniques regarding trama to help release it. I know there are a few Marriage and Family Counselors on this message board, maybe then can give more specifics than I can as a lay person and never having experienced it. Other than that it sounds like you are doing what you can do, it's important for her to feel safe and comfort. This does sound so hard on all of you since it is so frequent! Your whole family must be exhausted. I feel bad for your husband since he can't help. It does seem your Mom and no one else will do when you're that terrified. Take care, T.

Dear M.......At your local health food store or Whole Foods grocer (or online, for that matter) you will find homeopathic remedies which are indicated for shock and fear. I recommend that you consider Arnica montana (for psychic and/or physical trauma) and Aconitum napellus (for post traumatic fears). Look for the 30c potency. You can also look online to learn more about homeopathy. There is a wealth of information out there.

Questions? Feel free to write back.
C. Springer
Certified Homeopath

M.,
I agree with the suggestions on trying homeopathy remedies...also there is a great technique called Neuro-Emotional Technique that helps to release these traumas on a cellular level. I myself do alot of work with children and adults on this sort of issue. You can find a practitioner in your area at www.netmindbody.com and go to "find a practitioner". If you want additonal information you can contact me directly at ____@____.com
Peace and good health to you and yours,
Dr. A.

Hi there, I'm so sorry this is happening! I would suggest meeting with a homeopath. A simple remedy could help to "reset" her system. I live in SF and have a great referral if you are interested. I just joined this list so I'm not sure if it's local or national.....good luck, S.

Hi M.,

I have to make this brief, cuz I am running out the door... so so sorry you had this happen! It happened to me twice, once with my baby 3 mos old, then again with my 5 and 2 year old, and both had night terrors in addition to other things when they were older, like immediate (the next day after the car accident) phobia to bugs and dogs. It was insane. Serious crazy, nutty fit phobia...
So, I have three words for you
Osteopathy osteopathy osteopathy!
Google it and find someone who does osteopathic work on children in your area, because it will heal every single thing you are talking about, and fast!
xoxo
E.

Hi,
I'm L., and I have a one year old myself.

My question is, when she wakes up, what is she doing? And is that the same thing that's keeping you up at night?

I'm going to assume she wakes up being upset, crying and shaking and wanting contact with you. So, from my experience with peer counseling and in helping young children heal from early hurtful experiences, I think one of the key things is to allow the feelings to show themselves. This means letting her shake and cry *in your arms* so that her healing process can keep happening. You can even ask her to keep showing you how scary the experience was and also reminder that she is safe in the present moment with you. She will eventually have showed you all the feelings she has about what happened and she won't be scared by the memory anymore.

You mentioned that she "ends up sleeping" with you and your husband. Have you tried having her sleep with the both of you from the start of bedtime? I'm not suggesting that you know convert to a family bed. I think that this might be a useful temporary solution in terms of your daughter feeling safer in her sleep, so she might not wake up as often (though I think she'll still wake up), and you'll all potentially get more sleep overall.

I hope this is helpful. Let me know if you have questions about my thoughts or if I can clarify anything.

So sorry to hear about your situation. I would try contacting a naturopatic doc. Don't know where you live but Thauna Abrin is great. She works with kids & adults.. knows craniosacral therapy & uses homeopathy. ###-###-####.

Also, Christine Ciavarella is a good homeopathic practitioner who also works with kids. ###-###-####. Both are in the east bay. good luck.

I read all the responses you received, & agree with most, especially about using natural & bodywork remedies for your child. They are so helpful! One that was not mentioned, that I think is extremely helpful, is Rescue Remedy, it is a combination of flower essences that is indicated for shock & trauma. It would be good for everyone in your family to take it, especially when your daughter has a hard night. You can find flower essences at your local co-op, or natural foods store, you might be able to find them at Nugget, too. You can look up flower essences on the web through the flower essence society (in Nevada City, CA)& they make a lot of local flower essences as well. Their version of Rescue Remedy is called Five Flower formula. Please check it out!

I also agree that one-year-olds are not really old enough to "buck it up" & if you feel she should sleep in your bed for now, then by all means do it. There is no substitute for comforting a baby while she is in her most need, and this seems an appropriate situation. It's not like she is trying to manipulate you or get in between you & your husband! I understand that the post that mentioned keeping your daughter out of your bed is essential for you & your husband, but YOU get to decide what is essential for your family, based on what situations arise.

Hope your babe feels better very soon!

I don't have any experience with auto accidents, but when my son came home after we adopted him he did similar stuff (he was 22 months). We let him sleep with us for almost a year. It was hard because babies and little ones take up a lot of space! He learned he was safe and finally was able to sleep by himself. He was used to sharing a crib with 4 - 5 other babies so being by himself scared him to pieces!

I would try cranio sacral therapy with someone specialized in infants and children. It could help free her body of the physical and emotional trauma. I have brought my baby to a great practioner in Corte Madera. Her name is Maureen O'Neil her webiste is www.wakingthewomb.com. Good luck

C.

You already have a lot of good advice, I just have a few things to ask. First of all, you of course have the final call of what you do, but I really got steamed at the person who told you to have daddy comfort her, even though she doesn't want him, and to "keep her out of your bed." If you feel it helps her to bring her to bed with you for now, then you should bring her to bed with you. Like the post immediately before her, it may be the best temporary situation for you. Sleeping with you, and letting her feel and work through her fears, may help her get over the trauma. If you MAKE her stay in her own bed, and if you MAKE her tollerate Daddy when she wants to be comforted by mommy you are only compounding the trauma- not only will she have a difficult time falling asleep, but you could potentially damage the trusting relationship that you have built. The most important thing is to do what is best for you and your family, and to keep your end result in mind- that might mean letting her sleep with you until she sleeps one entire night without waking up, then gradually (and this will NOT be easy, I'm not going to lie) transition her back to her own bed. But, if this helps, the other good post is from an experienced counselor, and I am a child development specialist. The person who "steamed" me, the one who told you not to let your daughter control you is, well, we don't know.

PS Trauma is not strenthening for a one year old. Trauma (and I'm not trying to freak you out, I'm trying to stress how important this is) could possibly damage her social and emotional development. However, so far you are doing the right things to help her get over it. Just keep it up and be patient!

Why not to try cosleeping with her for a while? cosleeping works great for us

I can imagine how upsetting the auto accident was for you. It must have been even more so with your daughter. When something traumatic happens to us, that energy affects the nervous system and stays with us till we work it out (if not worked on it becomes embedded into the system). There are cranial sacral therapist who work with children and that could take care of this problem 100% - you just need to find the right person. Also an osteopath could help. I would HIGHLY recommend one of the two to help your daughter, it will make a huge difference. There is also another techniques call EFT (Emotional Freedom technique) that difference people do, and this could be done for your daughter.

Good luck with recovering, S. S.

Dear M.,

Well, several things, but the most important is that you realize that your l year old daughter is smarter than you realize, and you need to let Dad take her and comfort her, holding her hand or hands gently so that she cannot hit him. That is a great big no no. Holding her hands and saying no you cannot hit Daddy. He should take her and walk away from the bed room soothing and comforting her all the way. Rocking or walking and being patient and loving. She doesn't need to be in control of either parent.

Second, lots of people will scream, but you need to keep her out of your bed. You and Dad need to be alone at night - lots of time for cuddling and loving - that will make your lives closer and you will need that closeness when hard times come or problems (issues as they say nowadays) appear on the landscape.

Three - please don't worry so much about this trauma. Traumas are hard and scary, but they are not life threatening and they are strengthening - I have been through so much that my sister wonders that I am sane. Well, I am sane and strong, and understand life a little and so on and so forth, it would have been nice another way, but this is what happened so we have to deal with it. She will gradually get over this and you three will be closer for going through it together.

Amen, C. N.

Hi M.,

I wish I had good news for you but I don't. My daughter has never been a good sleeper. It took her a year and a half to sleep in her crib thru the night. This was all good until she turned 3. (My husband and I are divorcing and that probably doesn't help either. We live in seperate homes...so she has two different beds also.) At around 3, when she was in her big girl bed she would get out and sleep in the hallway outside my door. I would put her back and she would pop out everytime she woke up. Now, she comes in to my room at the wee hours of the morning. I am too tired to struggle with her so many times I let her sleep with me. So, for 2 years our of her 3.5 years of life, I haven't had undisturbed sleep. I hope you find the answer. I am continually looking for one.

Good luck!

A.