I would like help on a problem my two year old son is having at daycare. In the last two days my son has been bitten three times. The one on his arm was a pretty bad bite, it left a very bad bruise on his arm. The daycare center has a policy about bitting (three stirkes) they said that they normally try and work with the parents. My son has been bitten seven times now. He is not a biter himself, he has bitten a kid one time. It is not fair for my son to be these other kids chew toy. They bite him for no aparent reason, they can be playing or whatever and they bite him.
Any suggestions on what i can do? Both my husband and i have to work full time so there is no way we can take them out of daycare. Husband works nights and i work days. Please help a.s.a.p
I USE TO WORK AT A DAY CARE CENTER.YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO GET AN INCIDENT REPORT. YOU HAVE RIGHTS DON'T LET THEM GET THE BEST OF YOU.
You could remove them from this center and place them with an individual child care provider. They would be exposed to MUCH less (hopefully none) in terms of violence and/or “cannibalism” and you would have 1 person to deal with and not get the run~around about who is at fault. There is NO earthly reason that you should be forced into this situation when there are other and safer places for your children to be while you work.
There is a list of state registered providers with the Department of Family & Protective Services. at http://www.dfps.state.tx.us/Child_Care/Search_Texas_Child... and for other states as well.
There are programs that will help you find care in your area that are state registered.
“Collaborative For Children” at http://www.collabforchildren.org/ out of Houston, TX Monday-Friday 8:00a - 5:00p
Main Phone: 713/600-1100 • Resource & Referral: 713/600-1234 or 1-888-833-6805
And another one called
“Child Care Aware” at http://www.childcareaware.org/en/findcare
1-800-424-2246 Monday - Friday: 8am - 7pm EST
There are more, but this should get you started if you want individual care for your family.
Good luck S.
Hey T., I am a daycare provider. I have a home daycare and have been working with children for years. I would request that the daycare really watch what is going on. No child should be hurt at daycare continually. Biting is # one problem in most daycares. I usually remove the child biting from the room for awhile. This usually works as they miss their friend and will not bite again for fear of not playing for awhile. When they adopt this policy biting will stop altogether. Good luck!
Tell the daycare you want your son kept away from that child! It is their responsibility to deal with it!
From my own experience, and the experiences shared with me by others...toddlers are going to bite and/or be bitten. There is really nothing teachers can do to stop it & neither can the parents. I have never known a parent to truly find success in breaking their child of biting...they just had to grow out of it. And for a day care to kick out a child who does bite is a difficult thing to do to that parent, and they rarely will. Unfortunately, it really doesn't seem to be a discipline issue that can be resolved through proper training, so those kids will probably keep biting until they grow out of it. The only thing you could really do is find a new day care, but you can be sure there will be biters there too. My advice would be to stick it out, because most kids outgrow this phase quickly.
I do like a previous poster's recommendation to teach your child to respond with "No Biting!!" It might startle the biter enough to stop them quickly, preventing a more severe bite.
In all honesty, though...be glad your child is the victim, rather than the biter. My son was the victim of a biter. His little aggressor was my best friend's daughter, and we tried everything to get her to stop biting...time outs, spankings, taking things away, even putting spicy food in her mouth after she bit (from a pediatrician's recommendation.) Nothing ever helped. My friend was far more frustrated with trying to stop her child from biting than I was with having my child bitten. Rarely does a toddler do really severe damage with a bite. Kids are tough. It hurts, they cry, then it's over. I know it must be annoying, but it will pass sooner than you think.
GOOD LUCK!!!!
C.
Are the parents of the biter being informed? I worked in a daycare and each time there was a bite injury, an incident report was filled out. A copy was given to the parents of both children. For some reason, seeing it in writing really helps. For a child to be bit seven times is a bit excessive. Make sure their caregiver to child ratio is in compliance with state regulations so you know your child is being supervised properly. Sorry about the bites. Our daughter is starting preK in August, and I'm already dreading her first bite. ;o)
Hi, I am sorry to hear about this problem that you are having at your sons daycare. I would go and talk to the person over the daycare and tell them how you would feel. If you do not get the answer that you like, then I would ask them who is the person that owns the company and talk to them. There should be no reason that your son should be someones chewing toy.
C.
I would talk to the daycare workers and tell them that they need to keep the kid that keeps biting your kid away from your kid. I would stand my ground and keep hounding them about it until something is done. If nothing happens then I would check into another daycare or see if they can put him into another class. Most daycares have more then one class for the same age group.
As most of the other mothers have said biting is normal and if it happens once or twice, okay - but seven times, that is excessive. It sounds like the facility you have your child in. If you love it and the people who run it then work it out but if not then find somewhere else. My children go to Stepping Stones School and we are very happy with it. (Not Stepping Stones Daycare - they have bad reports I have heard.) The teachers there are great and it is very reasonable. Good luck to you.
Hi.
I have a 3 year old daughter. Though the biting is normal for the age, it still doesn't make anyone feel better about it. My daughter has been biten a few times at daycare too. However, in my situation it was resolved. So this is just my thoughts on your situation. Take them or leave them. I think you should talk to the daycare director about it. Let her know that you are upset and ask them how they are disciplining the child that is doing the biting. You have to be your child's advocate so don't be afraid to stand up for him. If the director does not do something to remedy the situation, I suggest you look for another daycare to move your son too. The move to another daycare may not be exactly what you want, but you do have to keep the best interest of your child in mind and if the director and/or teachers are not sticking to thier handbook and just make light of the situation you should reconsider them as being the best caretakers for your child.
I have been on both sides of this issue and understand your frustration. I had a child in daycare that was bitten repeatedly and have also worked as a toddler teacher in a daycare. We had a child who was a "biter". We tried everything and until we figured out why he was biting, we couldn't stop him. Children bite for a reason. They may look over and see your child playing with a toy they want or they may be cutting teeth. The teachers responsibility is to find out why the child is biting and discuss it with the parents. In my case we found out the biter was having problems with ear infections and was in a lot of pain. He had tubes put in and quit biting almost instantly. Getting angry only makes it harder on every one, including both children. I'm sure the parents of the biter feel horrible and would be willing to do everything they can to remedy the situation. I hope this helps!
Ok I had this problem too with my daughter who is now 2 years old. At the old daycare she was bitten around seven times within several months by 2 different biters. The daycare had a policy to shadow(watch closely) the biter and to give absolutly no attention to the biter when it happened and to consol the victim when they were bitten. All the strategies mentioned were of course text book from early education classes. The problem was that all the things they were doing weren't working so I was constantly talking to them about it. Soon I was then a victim myself.....a victim of being a "overprotective" parent who "bothered" the staff with my "endless" concerns about the safety of my child. At least that is the way the entire daycare treated me. In the long run I removed her when she was about 19 months old and it was more difficult then I can even explain. She didn't like the new daycare and she was afraid of the change...she cried when I left each morning for several weeks. (It was very emotional for both of us). She now enjoys the new daycare (we are going on 5 months) and you know what she has been bitten there once already. All and all I don't know what I would have done differently, I understand the kids between 1-3 years of age bite, daycare staff understand this too. The daycare is first and foremost there to protect and provide a safe environment for our children while we are away. If you feel you are not getting that, change daycares but know it will be hard on you and the chilren at first. One more thought, teach your child to stand up for himself by saying NO BITING loud together. practice with him.....it's helped mine. good luck
When my son was in daycare he got bit so many times by the same child once enough to make him bleed! I kept hounding them about the way my son was being cared for. He was in the 2-3 yo class because he has a disability and had to be with younger children to keep up mentally/physically. It tore my heart in two to see these bites on him almost daily for at least 2 weeks. My son doesn't feel pain as much as he probably should so it killed me to know he was being bit because half the time the daycare didn't even know. He doesn't cry! I finally got to the point where I was yelling at the daycare telling them to keep that kid away from my child or I will personally teach him to bite back. He stopped coming home with bites. I'm not sure what they did but it stopped after that fit I threw in there.
I know that's not very good advice but worked for me. I do think the yelling "no biting" idea is a very good one. At least it will get the teachers attention.
I hope it gets better!
