Mom Needs Help with 3 1/2 Year Old Constantly Needing to Use the Bathroom

Updated on May 08, 2008
M.S. asks from Enfield, CT
14 answers

I am a mother of a 3 1/2 year old boy who has been potty trained, will be a year this August. We have not had any issues with this until recently. He is not having accidents, he just needs to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. Sometimes he goes other times he doesn't. When he is at school or outside playing he does not need to go but when outside, says, "Mom I can wait to go to the bathroom." Now I have heard that if they have to go poop, it puts pressure on their bladder but I do not think this is the case because he is pretty normal when it comes to poop, one a day. Help, is this a behavior issue or medical one.

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So What Happened?

Well it has been a few weeks since my request was placed. I spoke to the doctor, who said he does not think it is medical because of being able to make it through the night and at school. Now during all this time, my daughter had become ill and all the attention was focused on her, so the doctor seemed to think it was behaviorally. He suggested to make a special time of the day for Zack and see what happens. My daughter got better and so did the need to go to the bathroom. He definitely does not go nearly as frequently as he did before. We are still incorporating special time of the day for Zack. Thank you everyone for your response, they were greatly appreciated.

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

Hi Amy - i personally would call the pediatrician. There could be a medical issue going on.How long has he been doing this? Whenever anyone feels the need to go but cant, usually means theres possibly an infection. There may not be anything, but i would rule it out 1st. Good luck!

L. - mom from Athol, 2 girls 3 & 7 :)

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C.R.

answers from Boston on

My son had episodes of this happening. We ended up going to a urologist in Boston. He was diagnosed with bladder spasms, and given a muscle relaxer, ditropan. He has been off and on that medicine now for about 1 1/2 years. It's worth pursuing if it upsets your son, like it did mine!

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

I would take him to the Dr, he may have a UTI

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J.M.

answers from Providence on

M.,

It's probably a phase, mine went through the same thing around that age. I would call the doctor just to make sure he doesnt have a UTI, but other than that, this too shall pass.

Good luck!!

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C.H.

answers from Boston on

I would also bring him to the Pedi. Boys can get UTI's too and that is how it usually presents itself. Hope you figure it out !

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R.B.

answers from Hartford on

My son went through the same type of episode when he was about 3 1/2. I had him checked out by our Pedi. Luckily, nothing was physically wrong with him. It lasted 2-3 weeks. It's frustrating, but I always took him to the bathroom each time he said he had to go. During the time that we weren't in the bathroom, I kept him very busy with a lot of fun activities. Hang in there!

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K.W.

answers from Boston on

It could be behavioral. Anything is possible with a 3 yr. old :-) But have you talked to his ped? Is it possible it is a bladder/urinary infection, where they think they constantly have to go to the bathroom? Just a suggestion.

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L.B.

answers from Portland on

A constant need to pee is a symptom of a bladder or urinary tract infection. Go to the docs.

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A.W.

answers from Boston on

Check in with your pedi, he could have a UTI .. just a thought.

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

I would rule out an infection, although if the behavior is only occurring at home, that's probably not the case. Is he getting your attention by doing this? Does he need assistance? Maybe you could try telling him to just go, he is a big boy and knows how to do it himself, and he doesn't need to interrupt you. If he'd rather go potty that play or do an activity, that will wear off. You could try saying, "When you come back, we can continue doing X." Or just ignoring him. I wouldn't reward him for going potty - he'll continue going every 5 minutes. You might say, "If you can go potty whenever you need to today without interrupting me and telling me about it, then we will do something special. If you keep interrupting me, then I can't get my chores done and I will not have time." Or something similar in his language. Good luck!

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A.B.

answers from Boston on

I think the other moms are right in saying that it's just a phase. Boys don't typically get bladder infections unless there's an abnormality in their "plumbing". Their ureter is far longer than in a girl and it takes an awful lot for bacteria to get up that far into the bladder to cause an infection.

I would say if he can hold it when he's outside, maybe the others are right in saying he's doing it for your attention and just let him go potty on his own. Set it up so the toilet's fully accessible to him alone and tell him to use it whenever he feels like it as he's such a big boy now.

However, just to be on the safe side, you can either send a first morning urine to the pedi for a check or they sell UTI dipsticks in regular pharmacies now. You can check his first morning urine and it can tell you if there's anything to be alarmed about, although they're probably not 100% accurate (although what is?). Although bladder infections aren't common, urethritis is a little more common in boys than girls. So, it's worth getting it checked.

Good luck!

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R.B.

answers from Hartford on

Hi there...perhaps he has a bladder infection.

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K.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi Amy,

My daughter has gone thru this a couple of times also. I had checked with the doctor a number of times to see if she had a urinary tract infection but the tests all came back negative. He suggested she see a urologists but I couldn't put her thru the procedure which entailed putting her to sleep. I have summed it up as an attention thing now though. She has a younger sister and sometimes most of the attention goes to her. I think having to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes is my daughters way of getting my undivided attention. The last time she started doing this I didn't pay her very much attention I just told her okay you can go if you have to. After about a week she just stopped having to go so often. Good luck!

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M.L.

answers from Boston on

How much is he going when he goes? My nephew went though this when he was about 5-6. It turned out to be one of many changing behaviors related to tics. (not ticks).
It also could be simply him getting used to the sensation of needing to go. There was a point that I knew where every bathroom in a ten mile radius was! My son "needed" to know and try out each one (I think it was a lack of confidence issue). Try keeping a log of how often and how much so that if this continue, you can contact the doctor with important information.

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