Mom Advise for My 2 1/2 Year Old

I think you should switch her to a sippy cup. She should not need a bottle anymore at this age no mater what the circumstances are. Try to keep only water in the sippy so she does not need to wake you up to get more in the night. Don't give in. She may fuss a lot the first night but as soon as she knows that is all she is going to get she will be fine.

You could try taking the paci and bottle away at the same time. Take them away and baybe replace them with a new stuffed animal or special blanket. My daughter has a leap frog puppy that she sleeps with. It will sing to her and you can program her name into it.

TV till that late is only going to stimulate her longer. She will stay up till she is exausted because it is still on. I would shut it off at 7 and try a soothing bath and some books to get her to bed earlier. At 2 1/2 she need more sleep at night. Take the tv out of her room if you can so you can't give in the the requests.

They understand more than you give them credit for. The longer she asks and you give it to her she will still want it. It is up to you to take it away. Tell her they are all going to the other babies that need them. Put them all in a bag and get rid of them so you are not tempted to give it back. You could take them and trade them in at a store for a new toy or books for bed time.

Changes are tough but if you stay consisted even when her dad comes home you will do great!!

Dr Ferber in his Sleep training book advises that you can either address one sleep association at a time, or several, or all, it really depends on you and your daughter, and your tolerance for change and the crying that is associated with it. He advocates so alled progressive waiting. After your bedtime routine, put your daughter in bed sleepy but not yet asleep without the bottle. Say "i love you", or whatever your little thing is, then leave. She may well wail. Wait 1 minute before going in, do not offer the bottle. just comfort reassurance, another "i love you" then leave. 3, 5, 10, 15, 20, 30 minutes are the next intervals on night 1. on night two, you start at 3 minutes, and so on. the third night, you start at 5, the fourth at 10, the fifth, should it take that long 15. etc. You must absolutely stand firm in your convictions while doing this process, otherwise, all you have taught her is that if she cries and protests for long enough, she will get her crutch back.

Good luck in establishing healthy sleep habits. Good luck in welcoming back her father. Make sure you explain what you are doing and why to him so that he doesn't undermine the process. He might even help you along by doing some of the reassurance, or by helping you stand firm.

My pediatrician recommends never doing everything all at once. I would start with the TV, because it's not necessary. After that I would go bottle than paci. I think taking the TV away earlier won't be so bad as she will still get some time with it on and it's not cold turkey, especially with daddy coming back. After daddy is back for awhile and she realizes daddy's not going anywhere, than go for the bottle and then the paci.

Start with the TV. Get it out of the room and turn it off one hour before you want her to be asleep. The dad coming back could be a reasonable impetus for this change, and maybe he can help with her bedtime routine. Have a consistent bedtime routine (jammies, teeth, books, maybe a bath) to settle her down before sleep.

When she has adjusted to the TV change, get rid of the bottle. If it has milk, you can start now by slowly diluting the milk with water. Increase the amount of water every few nights. When it's all water, change to a sippy cup.

Leave the binky till last. After she has adjusted to the changes above, start by cutting off the very tip of her binky. (Make sure she has "lost" all but one binky before this.) Every couple of days, cut a little bit more off the end. Eventually, she'll barely be able to suck on it/keep it in her mouth. She may still want to hold it, but that's no big deal. And my daughter had a binky until she was past 3.5 years. The last several months she couldn't suck on it, she could only hold it. It still helped her.

Please don't try to do all of these things at once. That's a huge amount of change and stress to place on a 2.5 yr old. Start with the worst offender (the TV) and end with the least (the binky).

Good luck!

Get the TV out of her room. She's too young!

I would not do all these things all at once...

I know that when my husband isn't around, I do thinks differently. however, that being said, I feel like you are trying to clean up your act b/c he's home now. Dont' make your daughter suffer for these things! Trying to break her all at once will do just that - break her. it's not her fault for these items... please, let her adjust to a 'new' life rather than forcing it on her. it will be a lot easier for the both of you!!!!

It would be a shame if she unconsciously relates whatever loss or deprivation she feels to the return of her daddy. This would be unconscious on her part, but it could still be real, and introduce a sense of confusion or resentment, without her ever knowing why. And of course, the reason you want to accomplish all this now could be that her daddy is coming home, and you want a calm, happy, and well-run home for him to return to.

Change is hard, and I wouldn't do it all at once. Sleep is incredibly important to health and brain development, so I would start by pulling the plug on the TV by 9:00 (or earlier). The blue light emitted by TV has been shown to reduce the production of melatonin, the sleep hormone, if viewed within 2 hours of bedtime. A bedtime story has a long and happy history in the emotional health of children and families.

You could also start adding water to her nighttime and morning bottles, maybe 10% more per week. At some point she'll find the milk distasteful, and unless she's using the nipple for comfort, she will probably reject the bottles on her own in a few weeks.

Good luck. Habits are a challenge to change, but people manage it all the time. Just don't try to do too many different things at once.

Personally I would go cold turkey on the bottle and pacifier. They don't need one past a year old. Thats they way I done it with all three of my kids. The only thing I allow is a sippy of water at night time. I let my 3 & 5 yr old watch tv at bedtime. They usually watch it for 30 min to an hour and then fall asleep. My 13 month old goes to bed in his crib with a sippy of water, no tv for him yet anyway. During school nights if they are not alseep by 9 tv goes off; we might read a book or two then thats it.good luck

Bottles really should be easy by this age...just drop them..let her continue the paci until you feel she is ready for another big step then ease off during the day (if she is still using during the day) then ease off mornings and then finally nighttime.

As far as tv. I understand being a single mom but this is a huge stimulation at night adn definately not something we allow in our bedrooms. We however listen to music before bed. All of us. I would suggest a couple of soothing lullabies on CD before bed in place of television but yes you might have to wean off of it. Remember to stick to your guns and don't give in. Given in leads to harder days in the future.

I would take the bottle away asap. IMHO, cold turkey is the way to go. You could even have her help you pack them up to "mail" to someone that has just had a baby. Buy her some new cups to replace the bottles, but only put water in them after you brush her teeth. Try to get her to take one last drink before you tuck her in and tell her she can have another cup when she wakes up in the morning. It is going to be rough, but get it over with. She could end up with cavities from taking a bottle this long. Set a timer on the tv. Tell her that when the tv turns off, it is time for the tv to go to sleep too. Start backing the time up 30 minutes at a time until it turns off at 9pm. Glad that dad is coming back home. Hopefully he will come back ready to help you make these changes.
Hope this helps! Good luck!

Do the tv first. Switch off at 9:30, then move it to 9 and if you can do it earlier, move it to 8:30. She should really be asleep by 9 already, plus give you and your husband time together.

Do the bottle weening when the TV thing is done. This way she will go to bed earlier, with a full tummy and still sleep well. Cold turkey sounds good, replace with a sippy full of water, next to her bed. Tell her if she gets thirsty it will always be there, fill it every night with fresh water. Nothing else. Leave it next to her bed on the bedside table. Give her the binky if she still needs it. But even the binky needs to go.

I agree with Peg M. but you can ask your husband to spend as much time with her as he can, so she can ease him back into her life, and love him all the same. Do fun things together as a family.

Keep up the good work, and good luck! Glad your hubby is back in the picture, for you and baby's sake.

Cold turkey. Sleep is important right now. Whether her reaction to daddy's return is good or bad, she is still going to need her sleep.

Filll the bottle w/a liquid she doesn't like and she'll start refusing it.

Unplug the TV or change the setting so when you turn it on, you won't get a reception. Then turn on the TV during the day and when it doesn't work, you''ll have to tell her its broken and you have to get it fixed. That way, she won't be so unprepared at night that her TV doesn't work.

These are just suggestions. Good luck.

As you say, you have a lot of things to work on. The bottle is actually the easiest thing as you can easily switch to a sippy cup - the kind with a straw is similar to a bottle and would probably make the easiest transition. In terms of doing away with the bottle, that is fine, but don't also do away with the milk in the morning and evening. She can still have that - just do it in a sippy cup.

In regards to the tv, I agree with all of the other moms about the tv. It should not be in the bedroom. Honestly, evening time is the busiest time with your toddler. I know you are probably tired, but honestly 6-8 is my busiest time of the day. You should really start a routine with your daughter that could include a bathtime. My daughter is 3.5 and we do her bath (playing hide and seek under the towel when she gets out of the tub). Then, we sit and read several books together (we do it anywhere in the house - sometimes in my bed, sometimes in the living room, sometimes in her room). THEN, we go into her room, with the light off and sit in a rocking chair (in the dark) and rock and sings songs. She mostly sings with me, but she wants to sometimes just listen. Then, she gets into bed and I tuck her in. She is in bed at about 7:45. THEN, I go and read to/with my son and then he does to bed at about 8:15 (he's 8). 90% of the time, my daughter stays in bed and goes to sleep. Sometimes, she gets up and comes and does all the stuff that kids do...I need water, I'm scared of the monster...etc. But, I just tell her to go back to bed. Most of those times, I promise to go back into her room and retuck her in after I have tucked her brother into bed.

Anyway, my main point is - you need a routine that she can count on. YOU need to be vested in the routine. The tv is your default way of putting her to bed without you participating in it. But, tv is a known stimulate - it doesn't lure them into sleep. She needs to be sleep trained. And honestly, even at this age, sometimes they have to lie in bed and just stay there awake - even if they are not ready to go to sleep yet.

The other key point here is that you and your husband deserve quality time in the evening together. The only way you are going to get that is if you have a regular bedtime for your daughter. Also, your husband could be utilized to help put her to bed. He can have a roll in the whole process every night as well (he reads a story to her every night).

There are TONS of great books out there for toddlers that are really engaging. You will probably be really amazed at how much she will love to read with you.

Good luck!
L.

Maybe instead of turning the TV off at a certain time, give her options of 2 shows she can watch and then after her two shows are up, the TV goes off, and then goes as far as to say would you like me to turn the TV off or would you like to do it. This is what I do with my 3-year-old son. He watches one/two shows of his choice, then it's bath time and then we play and read. I've always tried to give him choices.Just a thought about the TV.

I'd start with that TV problem first. In my opinion, a child never needs a tv in their room. I would remove the tv from her room, period. If you want to let her watch a show or 2 or a movie during the day or something out in the living room or in your room, that's one thing. But letting her run the show by staying up until 10 PM - and you're not turning off the tv...you said it yourself, she's a wreck in the morning.

I can't imagine how hard single parenthood is, but no matter what, you are still the mom. Get that tv out of there today. Next change her over to a sippy cup...if there isn't a bottle around, she won't have the choice. It will only take her a day or 2 most likely to accept that she has a cup now, not a bottle. The pacifier is a harder one if she's used to having it for comfort, but that will have to be cold turkey too. Some people cut the tips off the top of the pacifier so that it doesn't "work" anymore and the child doesn't want it. I just went cold turkey with my 2 instead. 2 nights where I had to comfort them a lot and then after that, they found something else that was comforting in their beds (for my son it was his blanket, for my daughter it was her little towel she loves). Good luck with everything.

1st...WHY does a 2 1/2 year old have or NEED a television i their room? My kids NEVER had televisions in their rooms. Television was a privilege that was shared with the family in the family room. If your child is falling asleep to the television 1) she is watching way too much television 2) You are starting bad habits for her. She may very well become one of the nation's obese children that sits in front of the television all the time in stead of playing 3) I feel that television inhibits a child's imagination. It is instant gratification that does not require the brain to think.

Mother of three: 22 yrs, 21 yrs, and 8yrs

Get rid of the tv for sure and the bottle and pacifier...dental implications later!!!
Create a routine to wind her down and get to bed by 7:30 or 8:00. Pick a weekend and start the new routine. You can try to have music play on a cd for awhile to start to soothe her,but taper that off after awhile.
Your little one is sleep deprived...she will probably be much happier in the morning with more sleep!
Take Care

Hello,
First I just want to start off saying a 2 1/2 yr old should not have a pacifier or a bottle. You have to think about the long term health effects as well as the dental aspects.. You need to stop both immediately and you will probably have to do so cold turkey.. Be prepared to get little or no sleep for a couple of days. Also I don't believe a TV should be in a 2 yr olds room, 9:00 is too late a bedtime for a 2 yr old. You need to get in a routine of getting her to bed earlier around 7:30, 8:00 the absolute latest. If you get her on a earlier bed time it makes it easier for you to go cold turkey she make wake up during the hours you are still awake making it less likely for her to wake up in the wee hours of the moring. Lastly absolutely no TV after 7:00 that keeps you stimulated. As a adult I have started turning my Tv off @ 9:00 and it makes a world of difference for my sleep habits..
I hope this helps