Milk Supply Is Too Low for Child's Appetite

Updated on December 12, 2015
T.D. asks from Randolph, MA
55 answers

Help! My 2 month old son who was born premature has finally become great at latching and breastfeeding. Some feedings during the day go great and then later in the day and in the evening I'll find that he is still very hungry when my supply is depleted. He cries and cries and tries to suck more but gets nothing. I try pumping and get maybe half an ounce. I've had to start supplementing with formula and I'm feeling really guilty about it. I'm trying to pump when he gets a bottle and in the morning when I have a greater supply to try to stock more milk and hopefully get my supply up again but it all seems so inconsistent. Some days I'm engorged and others it barely comes in. I want to do what's best for him and I'm finding this to be a real emotional issue. I feel like such a failure when I don't produce enough milk and he's still hungry and rooting. He seems to like the formula but I feel like I'm giving in too soon. But spending an hour nursing so that he's still hungry for a bottle that he drinks in 10 minutes right afterwards is hard to take. Any ideas on how to improve the milk supply and keep it consistent to meet his hunger demands?

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone for your supportive advice and for sharing your breastfeeding stories. It made me realize that I really want to breastfeed but should not take it personally if I need to supplement with a bottle when he's just too hungry. I've been pumping in the mornings so that I always have some milk in the fridge during later in the day if needed. I know supply is supposed to meet demand so supplementing kind of negates that, but I just want to feed my child. He seems happier and so am I.

More Answers

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S.T.

answers from Boston on

Get a lactation consultant right away- check out lalecheleague.org (I think they even provide free LC services depending on where you live), or talk to your doctor. My friend had a similar issue and renting a hospital-grade pump also helped. Good luck!!

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J.V.

answers from Burlington on

Hi T. - I agree, get to a lactation consultant asap!! Your son is still very, very young and may not have mastered breast feeding. It took my son a good 2-3 months to get the hang of it. There were a ton of tears shed (by both of us!), but he got it down and I nursed him (& pumped when I went back to work) for 15 mos. My son also loved to suck, so the pacifier was a lifesaver. Are you sure he is hungry after a feeding or does he just want to keep sucking? I agree with what someone else here said too about getting the baby on a scale, check to see if he's gaining weight appropriately. AND, give yourself a break! Don't stress (try not to), take it easy on yourself. I am sure you are a wonderful mom, so let some of that guilt go (I know, almost impossible to do). Best thing though - lactation consultant!! I've used them with both kids - they rock! Good luck!

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V.S.

answers from Boston on

First, congratulations on breast-feeding your son under difficult circumstances! And now it's important to continue nursing. You're not a failure! He may be having a growth spurt which means he needs to suck a lot to bring in more milk. You also have to drink a lot of liquids, as well as eat regularly and well, in order to make that milk. Talk to someone at La Leche or look for a lactation consultant. Look for people who will support you in your desire to continue breast feeding. Do it soon. And don't give up!

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S.K.

answers from New London on

The best way to increase your milk supply is to keep nursing. Your breasts won't produce more milk unless they are stimulated and baby does this better than anything else. All babies go through this as they grow- for a few days it seems like they aren't getting enough and you do nothing but nurse all day long! Baby is actually trying to get your body to make more milk. You just need to hang in there and keep nursing around the clock until your body catches up. If your son doesn't seem to be getting enough- why are you pumping? You should just be breast feeding him to make sure he gets all he needs.
Just relax and enjoy your little one. He may just be fussing to fuss and not because he's hungry. Sometimes they just want to suck for comfort.
You should read the book- So That's What They're For. It's awesome and has some real helpful hints. It reads quickly and is pretty humorous too!
Good luck,
S.

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N.R.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.:

It sounds like your son might be going through a growth spurt and his needs are increasing. Your supply will catch up but sometimes there can be a delay.

First rule of breastfeeding: Don't Feel Guilty!!! I know this is easier said than done. Also as a first time mom everything seems emotionally tied to your success or failure as a mom. I went through the same thing:) Breastfeeding can be exhausting and frustrating when you have problems like these. Give yourself permission to not be perfect!

My milk came in late when my son was born. It took more than a week for it to really come in and my son seemed like he was starving-I felt awful. I had to supplament him initially but was able to wean him off the formula and sustain full time breastfeeding. I went back to work when he was 3 months and I breastfeed him until he was 9months old. Think of supplementing as a temporary thing.

I would also suggest getting a consult with the lactation specialist at your hospital. They can do these over the phone and may be able to help.

Other suggestions: make sure that you are drinking enough (and eating enough); hard to do with a new baby but it takes a lot of calories and a lot of fluids to make milk. Look for some "Mother's Milk" tea (Whole Foods will have it if your reg store doesnt). It has an herb in it that stimulates milk production. Keep up the pumping, especially when supplementing, to keep up your supply. Also, what kind of pump are you using? The battery ones don't do a thing. If you have one of these look into getting a Medela Pump-in -Style or similar type. You really need the power suction that these provide. You might also be able to rent a high end pump from your hospital.

Good luck-you are doing fine and your baby is too, promise!:)

N.

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S.S.

answers from Providence on

T.,

First things first...get the little guy on the scale. Are his diapers wet? You might not be low on production at all. Jack might just be loving nuzzling and suckling. Some babies are like that. My youngest I just could NOT get her off me until she was 15 months old. I loved it. Anyway, don't go to the crying as a sign he's not getting enough, go to the pediatrician's scale. Or see if visiting nurses or something can weigh him in your house. It is important that he be weighed on the same scale each time so that the you are not dealing with scale calibrations. The same baby on two different scales can show up with weights as far off as four ounces (that's a lot for a newborn). Good luck to you, T., hang in there!

Namaste,
S.

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C.S.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.,
My dauhter was not premature but I had a very similar issue with breastfeeding. I was totally unprepared for how guilty and how frustrated I would feel when this happened. I also had to supplement right from the beginning b/c my daugheter was not getting enough to eat and was losing a significant amount of weight. I spoke with several different lactation consultants and they all suggested to feed and then pump to try and build supply. This is great if you have all day to spend doing it but I was unable to keep it up for to long. When I did pump I would not produce much at all and it only incresed my frustration level. I did supplement with formula and my daughter began to gain weight and was happier and healthier than when I was breast feeding exclusivley. Try and cut yourself some slack if you can, once I was able to let go of some of the guilt and realize that this is what was best for my daughter (after about two months of stress and anxiety along with bi-weekly weight check at the doctor) we were both much happier and much less stressed out! I am due to have a second baby in a few weeks and I am already feeling anxiety about breastfeeding this child. I am planning to try and hopefully it will work out better this time but once again I am going to not place unreasonable expectations on myself or my child.
Take care,
C.

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A.T.

answers from Boston on

The other posters are exactly right- make sure you are drinking more fluids than you think you need! Caffeine can affect milk supply, so watch out for that. Also, when I was on the birth control pill, my supply dropped significantly, even though I was on the low hormone one and the dr. said it wouldn't affect my milk. Going off that helped immensely.
I also wanted to just let you know that I had a similar experience with my 3rd child. He was born at 26 weeks. I had to pump exclusively for about 5 weeks before I could try to feed him, and then had to continue pumping until he was 8 weeks and could come home. By the end I was getting almost nothing. I consulted with my pediatrician, and got her approval to ignore the advice everyone (visiting nurses, etc.) was giving me about supplementing with formula, because we knew that in order to reestablish my milk supply, he had to eat, eat, eat! He lost several ounces over the first few days, which is really hard to see when he only weighed 4 lbs. 11 ounces at 8 weeks of age. But within the first week of nursing very frequently, my supply kicked in and he was a happy baby!! :) It can be hard, but it was well worth it. He nursed until he was 14 months old, and has grown up to be happy and healthy and way too smart for his own good;)
Supplementing with formula when you're trying to increase your milk supply can create a vicious cycle- the baby is full longer so has less need to nurse, your body adjusts to this lack of nursing by producing less milk, etc. I'm not in any way saying not to give formula, just cautioning you, and reassuring you that your baby will not starve to death- your body will kick in and make you proud. :)
The pump can't do nearly as good a job as the baby, so if you have the time, just nurse him every second you get. I also carried my babies around in a sling so they could nurse while I was able to get stuff done.
Also, be sure he's latched on really well- it's hard to get preemies to open their mouths wide enough to get the whole area around the nipple in their mouths, but they CAN do it!
Best wishes with nursing- try not to be discouraged!

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A.K.

answers from Burlington on

T.,
Milk supply can change often, especially with a first baby and even more so with a premature baby. Depending on how premature your son was, the circumstances of his birth and your overall health all are factors that effect your milk supply (and a host of others!).

My second daughter was born at 26 weeks, and had to stay in the NICU for 4.5 mo after birth. During that time I had to pump and she was fed breastmilk through a feeding tube. Since I had to pump for so long before attempting to put her to the breast I also struggled with milk supply.

My advice would be to seek the help and encouragement of a lactation consultant. Often they are available free of charge to mothers of premature babies ~ you could find out from the hospital you gave birth at.

Some herbal remedies are fenugreek and blessed thistle. I had to take 3 of each tablet 3 times per day. For some that is enough, however, if it has been more than 3 months since birth an herbal remedy might not be sufficient. It is always best to start small with herbal remedies and help from the lactation consultant, then if supply is still an issue your Dr or pediatrician can prescribe medications that can help you have a better supply.

Also keep in mind that your body's hormones are changing often, and to help your body handle these changes you need extra fluids and rest.

I have a lot of resources from the breast feeding clinic where I went with both of my daughters. I found them so encouraging with ALL of the issues we faced (we had just about every breast feeding problem imaginable between my 2 daughters).

I hope you are able to get the help and encouragement that you need.

You are doing a great job! Please don't feel guilty ~ you are doing the best you can for your baby (and a little supplementing won't hurt ~ both of my babies have needed to have supplements and they are both doing great now). You have to weigh the options and know what is best for your baby. Any and all breast milk he gets is wonderful, and if he gets a little formula in the process it won't hurt him.

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D.M.

answers from Barnstable on

It's all about supply and demand. If you supplement with formula at all, it throws the balance off. I suppose it would be hard to suffer through some time of allowing him to be extra fussy and deny him the bottle while you're trying to build up breastmilk supply, but it sounds like you're suffering already. Have you tried going to a La Leche League meeting or talking to a LLL leader or nurse? They might be able to help.
I can't say i know what it's like with a premie, I don't; my 3 baby girls were all good size and all nursed successfully for a couple years each. I do think it's worth some work to be successful at it because, in retrospect, it's so great to have had that time with my girls. It goes by so fast (I know you can't see that now). Good luck.

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B.S.

answers from Boston on

Have you considered calling a lactation consultant? Have you consulted kellymom.com?

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R.F.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.
It's very common for your milk supply to be less at the end of the day. Stresses of the day, being tired and just the general hubbub of the end of the day all contribute to a lower milk supply. He's also probably feeling those stresses and may just need the comfort of nursing and being held close and not necessarily hungry. The dinner hour is usually a time when children are more needy and cranky. I would advise to just keep nursing as long as you can (demand increases supply) and then if he seems to need more cuddle time strap him into a sling or front pack and continue with your evening. Most of all RELAX and don't worry so much. Mother nature is a beautiful thing and if left to her own devices will make everything work just fine. Help her along by making sure you're drinking plenty of fluids (a big glass of water every time you sit down to nurse was the best advice I ever got), getting enough rest and eating healthy foods. Remember, he was born premature and has been having a hard time so you're really still technically in the first weeks of bringing home a new born who is learning all these things. Time will smooth everything out. You could also try "Mother's Milk" tea by Traditional Medicines. Make yourself a cup every time you sit down to nurse. It's blended with lots of great milk producing herbs that will help as well. Most health food stores carry it, some health sections of major super markets, and way back when I was nursing my kids I used to get it at GNC. Good luck! You're doing a wonderful thing for your son. Don't let a little bump in the road like this scare you away!!

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M.C.

answers from Bangor on

Congratulations, T.! Be gentle with yourself here, you're doing the best you can. I know it's so hard, though! When my little guy didn't seem to be getting enough milk from me, the previously mentioned Mother's Milk gave me just the boost in supply that I needed. There are other herbal tricks, as well, but I didn't have to venture beyond this. I drank 3 cups a day for a week or 2 and that was all it took.

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R.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.,
With all the responses, I hope you see you are not the only one who has this same issue. I too went through it. With the 50 responses this may be redundant but I wanted to send it along anyways. I tried all of it, the tea, pure fenugreek, the pumping, the suckle-till-your-nipples-want-to-fall-off approach, water, stress, sleep.... you name it, I tried it. Personally, I was uncomfortable with the Reglan because I read too much internet and saw some scary side effects because Reglan crosses the blood/brain barrier. I agree it is safe for the baby, but I wasn't interested in even the slightest chance of a neurological side effect. That's when my lactation consultant recommended Domperidone (or Motillium for generic) which is the same type of medication as Reglan but doesn't cross the blood/brain barrier and is safer for mom. I order it online from a Foreign Pharmacy and it comes from the Johnson & Johnson foreign manufacturer, Janssen-Cilag. I order it from this website: http://www.inhousepharmacy.com/general/motilium.html which I got from this website where I learned all about studies and risk and the like: http://www.breastfeedingonline.com/domperidone.shtml .

I was so worried that I waited to start using it until around 6 months, I wish I had started sooner. My son is now almost 11 months and is starting to eat finger food but I still nurse him 3-4 times a day and even leak when I go 3 or 4 hours between nursing. IT'S GREAT!!!! He is so much more satisfied with the nursing and I have less "wear and tear" on my poor nipples, which were suckled out, let me tell you! Please read into it as a safe and effective solution. Good luck. Remember, any amount of breastmilk is better than no breastmilk. You'll do fine. There are alot of us out there just like you.........

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K.D.

answers from Providence on

well make sure you are having something to drink yourself every time you nurse and then some. Dont; be so hard on yourelf it takes time and it sounds like you have had a tough start with the prematurity issue. your body will adjust try and relax YOu are not a failure by any means. Make sure you are getting enough rest because exhaustion can deplete your milk supply. hang in there you are loving and feeding your baby and there is no one who is judging you if you decided to bottle feed your baby..... It is all nurturing enjoy it they grow so fast and don't stress. mother of 13 11 8 and 14 mths K.

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R.S.

answers from Hartford on

Oh my Goodness! I don't even know where to start...first an "e-hug," from one mom of a premie to another. Second, a virtual raising of the white flag to signal a truce between the breastfeeders and bottle feeders in this world! Beating yourself up and feeling guilty and stressed over supplementing is pointless and a waste of your precious energy! When my second daughter came 2 months early, my milk didn't come in for almost a week. Guess what she got...formula...she was also sent home (on doc's orders no less) with instructions to supplement twice a day to up her calorie intake...initially, my supply was very low and I found that once we approached her actual due date, my supply increased...I pumped and fed on demand...cluster fed...followed all the great advice the other Mom's posted here...PLEASE....make peace with yourself this instant...I know how hard it is to work at getting your supply up after a preemie...it varies and will continue to vary which is so frustrating! I beat myself up with my first and also found that happy momma = happy baby! But keep at it, and supplement as needed. Just try to pump when you supplement. He could also just enjoy suckling, which happened with my first (who was a week overdue...go figure) We nicknamed her "the hoover," as she could have just latched on for days! Maybe try a pacifier. Again, my first took a paci and nursed just fine...my second is an avid thumb sucker. None the less, the advice from the mom's here is spot on...congratulations on your new baby and try to enjoy as much of it as you can---it goes by so fast!

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M.B.

answers from Pittsfield on

DRINK WATER!!!LOTS OF IT!! WATER MAKES MILK!
also there is nursing tea you can buy in the natural foods section of your grocery store.
make sure YOU are eating nutritious food and snacks throughout the day.

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M.B.

answers from Hartford on

T., i am so very proud of you!!!! keep up the great work!
we supplimented our first child too, he had trouble nursing. unfortunaley it made him extremely sick, since he had a dairy allergy!! i think the early exposer made it worse... :( We stuck with nursing and he nursed till he was 2 & 1/2!
i agree w/ "Some herbal remedies are fenugreek and blessed thistle". mother's milk tea & oatmeal did the trick for me! i keep oatmeal in my diet now while bf. keep up on your fluids of course, but don't forget to exercise &/or do yoga/breathing. the relaxing you get from yoga or just sitting still eyes closed and breathing is great for your body & mind. i found when i was sure to do one of these each day my supply was better!
keep pumping. good luck! you can do it!!!!!

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M.L.

answers from Burlington on

I know exactly how you feel. My son, now 28 months old, was, from almost the beginning, unable to be filled by my milk. I had to start supplementing when he was only a few weeks old, and I felt SO guilty. Looking back now, I wish I had been more relaxed about it, but everyone stresses how important breastfeeding is--it was hard to see past all that. I did my own research, though, and found that even if they are getting a small amount of your milk for the first 6 months, that's the most crucial thing. My son quickly got used to the speed with which a bottle filled him and then wanted nothing to do with the breast, but I still pumped just a little bit every day so he would get some of my milk (until he was 5.5 months old).

There are going to be so many bigger things to stress out about--really, don't let this be one of them. One day you'll look back and wonder why it was such a concern for you.

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S.W.

answers from Burlington on

Hi T.

Your milk supply is based on a supply and demand system-the more your baby demands, the more your body should make. However, this doesn't seem to be the case with you. Are you making sure you are drinking plenty of fluids and eating enough? Both are very important to building a milk supply. If you are sure you are, I would suggest talking to you pediatrician and ask about something called a Suplemental Nursing System (SNS). This is a system that allows your baby to nurse at the breast and get formula or pumped milk at the same time, thus adding to the demand which will hopefully build the supply back up.
Your baby may also be going through a growth spurt right now and that could be why he is eating more.
Hope this helps!
PS Don't feel guilty about the formula-sometimes it is necessary.

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R.D.

answers from Boston on

This is sooo difficult, I struggled with this as well and I agree it is incredibly emotionally & physically draining.

First, make sure you are really well hydrated ALL the time and getting plenty of rest (I know, easier saiad than done). Basic but very important.

Oatmeal and Brewer's Yeast are a great help to improving your breastmilk supply and there are oral supplements & nursing teas that help a lot.

Most importantly try not to give up. Maybe his feeding pattern has changed recently and your body just needs to catch up. Nursing more often will increase your supply (i know this can be inconvenient and goes against what many docs say as far as getting them on a schedule but...) Your body works on supply & demand so it should adjust eventually. Try keeping him on the breast even if you think he isn't getting anything, this should stimulate milk production and you may even find that another duct has more milk in it...massage your breast to help ensure you are emptying completely.

Good luck!!! I truly know how frustrating this can be...keep up the good work and hang in there!!!

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J.P.

answers from Hartford on

I can understand. My son was born 5 weeks early and I didn't see him for three days because he was transfered to another hospital. I pumped my milk while he was in the hospital for 10 days and did some breastfeeding with him there. He would latch and suck easily, but he seemed to tire easily too. We were supplementing with formula per doctor's order anyway. With this being my first time, it was emotional. I gave him what I could mostly through pumping and I gave him formula. Remember a little bit of breastmilk is better than none at all. I believe the breastmilk helped keep my son healthy in late winter months and spring months with my husband coming down sick twice. Try not to get too discouraged, you are doing great.

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L.C.

answers from Orlando on

Don't feel like a failure for not being able to produce enough milk:( You should look at the two months of breast milk your baby has already gotten as a great accomplishment and very loving thing you've done for your baby and don't focus on the negative. If you think positive thoughts it might help to energize your body with positive energy and help promote milk production. Your body and health respond to your attitude more than you think. Besides they say the first 6 weeks are the most important time to breast feed and you've already made it past that mark so give yourself a pat on the back cause it's not easy.

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J.V.

answers from Portland on

Hi T..

I, too, had a baby who was hungry all the time and like you, I could not produce enough breast milk to satisfy his hunger. A nurse actually secretly (?) snuck him some formula in the nursery the second night of his life because she said he was crying like he was starving, even though I'd been nursing him almost constantly!! I also felt a lot of guilt and I think that is the worst thing for mom and baby. If you are doing the best you can with breastfeeding and you have a baby who is doing well with breastfeeding and supplementing then do yourself a favor and feel like you are doing what's best for your baby.
Of course breast milk is best; everyone knows that, but there is SO much pressure on a new mother now to breast feed and ONLY breast feed, sometimes it just doesn't work out that way for everyone. You need to just be able to relax and get some sleep and take each beautiful moment with your baby as it comes; without judgement from yourself or anyone else.
That all being said, if you really want to be sure you are doing all you can to breastfeed, or want some help or suggestions, you should call the Ballard House, or Mercy Hospital, or the LaLeche League. They can help with breastfeeding suggestions and send over a nurse to help you if need-be.
Remember to do what YOU know is best for you and your baby!! You have a wonderful woman's and now mother's intuition. Trust yourself!!!
Hope that helps.

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W.W.

answers from Boston on

Drink a lot of liquids - particularly before and during nursing.You also need to be relaxed and as rested as possible. Let the household chores go for a while.
Make sure each side is emptied - it stimulates milk production. You supply will adjust to your baby's needs,
Contact a local leche group for support.
Take care of yourself.

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A.M.

answers from Boston on

The more you pump and supplement with formula the less milk your body will make. Nurse more if the baby is hungry the more he baby demands milk from the breast the more that will be made. Althoug baby needs to wait a day to catch up there will be plenty of milk for him the next day. Breast feeding is supply and demand if the demand goes away with formula then there will be no need for your breasts to make milk at a certin time of day, it is also a better indication to your breast to have your baby suckling at them to produce more then using a pump

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A.K.

answers from Providence on

Read some of my posts!! I have had this same problem, and I still got her to nurse and wean herself!!!! for a year. The best thing that worked for me, was to drink TONS of water, and this stuff called fenugreek. its an herbal supplement that makes you produce milk. And another really cheap and easy way to get that is to eat maple and brown sugar oatmeal. Fenugreek is the herb that the use in it to produce that maple flavor... so if you are weary of herbs, just eat some quaker! The herb smells and makes you smell like maple. your pee, your sweat everything! but it works, also try mother's milk tea. they have that in job lot, if you can't afford it, and the SAME product in GMC and stores like that... I am frugal because I am poor! so i know all the tricks... anyways, good luck, and I know how you felt, as far as feeling guilty... I know all too well about that. And like I said, my daughter weaned herself, so that is STILL hard on me. I still wish that she would just change her mind and latch on sometimes. She stopped nursing 5 months ago. but, good luck!

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L.S.

answers from Boston on

There are many ways to increase your milk supply. Acupuncture and herbs such as fenugreek (you can purchase at a whole foods or natural health food store), drinking lots of water, and strange, but true Guiness Beer ~ when my milk supply was down this was recommended to me~something about the yeast and it did help. you would have to pump and dump though. Good luck!

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A.M.

answers from Hartford on

Hi T.,

I have to agree with Carey. I have two beautiful, healthy, happy, and intelligent girls who I experienced the same issues with. We did not deal with them being premature, but I did have a great deal of anxiety, trouble, guilt--you name it--with breast feeding. Both of my children had their own issues which prevented them from nursing properly. I wish that I could go back and be more relaxed about it. In fact, if/when we have #3, I have vowed to be totally okay with whatever happens. You see, with #2 I had finally gotten to nursing 100% after everything that we had gone through (about 5 1/2 months). I was thrilled! Only to have contracted some illness, put in the hospital and on meds that I was not allowed to nurse with. So she was on formula until I was allowed to nurse again, and by that time, she had no interest. I tried for 2 months and she just wouldn't do it. I was sad and disappointed, but had known that it was a possibility and had prepared for it. After all of that, I decided that if we had a third I was not going to sweat it. No matter what happened. Sometimes there are things beyond our control and we have to go with the flow.

I applaud you for trying and for wanting to do this. I wish that I knew the ease other women have with nursing, but since I am not one of those lucky women, I know that I tried my best and that is all we can ever do. I hope that someone here can give you the advice that will work 100% for you and that this will be a distant memory of a slight bump in the road. I am one of the ones to offer support and encouragement from someone who has been there. I must admit, I'm glad that I am not the only one--you are not, either. Do what you can do, and forget about the rest. Most importantly, DO NOT let any of this take away precious time from you enjoying and relaxing with your baby. I did and I can't get that time back. Once I realized that, I made myself let go.

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

You've gotten a lot of advice, so I hope this is helpful and not overwhelming. I feel strongly that the most important thing is that the baby eats, not what he eats. Equally important is for you to feel good about this incredibly hard transition into being a mom. I think the worst part about these hard choices (and this is only one of a million - CIO or not, to send to daycare and where, cosleeping, etc) is that you can agonize over them endlessly, getting tons of conflicting advice, all of which is "right," but not all of which is right for you. It might be helpful for you to make a "plan" and then resolve to feel good about it and try to let the stress go. Some suggestions: a) take fenugreek, etc for 2 weeks, if things aren't better then, supplement with formula b) "drop" one feeding on purpose, make it a formula feed that either you or dad can do around the dinner hour, and really bulk Jack up then so he's not so hungry into the witching hour (a lot of people do this who aren't struggling anyway) c) rent a hospital grade pump for 2 weeks to get your supply up, then supplement with formula. These are just ideas, of course, you could come up with something else that could work for you. My main point is that the constant worry about this bad for all of you, and, although "breast is best" your son will thrive and be a happy and healthy kid if you do give him formula.

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N.B.

answers from Portland on

T..
The best advice I got was to be consistant! Try to feed him at/around the same time every day. Not only does that help him to be on a routine but it will help your milk know when the demand is there. Also.. Don't feel bad about having to supplement with formula. It will him him go to a bottle and it will help him to sleep at night and he wont be hungry! I understand wht you are going through as my daughter did the same thing. But after a routine adjustment for me and a few formula feedings for her we got through it. Keep in mind that the emotions you are feeling are normal and are heightened. ( got to love those hormones) No matter try to not stress as that will also hinder milk production. Trust your instinct as a mom.. Even as a first timer, and you'll get through it.

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A.H.

answers from Washington DC on

The emotional component is pretty hard to take. I understand the feeling of failure, but you are giving your baby everything you can. My daughter just turned a year and I had no problem with milk until later, but it was still hard to accept giving her formula. Some things that I have done to help my supply include pumping, drinking LOTS of water until I felt like I would float away and taking fenugreek as a supplement. There are a number of herbal combos that are suggested to help boost your milk. Although it is hard to accept the formula at first, but it is much better for your baby to have him full and content and he is still getting all of the milk you produce. I found a formula called Baby's Only. Check the product out online if you want. It seemed like a much healthier option of formula to me.

Good luck and try not to be hard on yourself. You are a great mom that you are so concerned.

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C.P.

answers from Hartford on

Please do NOT supplement with formula right off the bat, it sounds as tho your 2 month old is going through a growth spurt. If you supplement with formula, your body won't know that he needs more milk right now, and won't produce it. Supplementing is rarely needed - and can lead to trouble. What you can get for amounts when you pump is in NO WAY indicative of what you're actually producing, or what baby is getting. A baby's suck is MUCH more efficient at getting milk from your breasts than even the most expensive, advanced pump. Also, just because he does drink a bottle after nursing doesn't really mean anything.

You don't mention his diapers - how are they? That's one of the best methods to tell if the baby is getting "enough". Does he consistency produce wet diapers throughout the day?

Please check out this part of the excellent website, "Kellymom" about "Is my baby getting enough milk?":
http://www.kellymom.com/newman/04enough_milk.html

** I found an excellent 4-part series of videos on YouTube titled "Is my baby getting enough milk?" that you might like to check out! Here's the link to the first one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeqnas3Uf2A

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P.M.

answers from Boston on

A lot of women have supply problems so you aren't alone. First of all are you eating good, drinking plenty of water, and getting enough rest? Also if you are stressed that can affect your supply. I take fenugreek and it's suppose to help increase supply. If you go to Whole Foods there's a section of different herbs that youcan take to help increase your supply(you can get them online too just google increase milk supply). There's also nursing tea that you can take that is suppose to help. Also oatmeal helps with supply.
As far as the pumping goes it doesn't always indicate how much milk you have and sometimes a pump just isn't good at getting milk out. What type of pump do you have?
Some days when I pump I get an ounce and others I can get 5 with no problem. Also always offer the breast first and if you have to then supplement with formula. The more you give formula the less milk your body will produce. You can also talk to a lactation consultant to help you out.
Good luck

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A.H.

answers from Hartford on

Hi T.,

Just wanted you to know that no matter what happens, you are NOT a failure! I know just how you feel; I had the same thing happen with my son. He was the opposite -- a big baby, but I had a long delivery, with induction, ending in c-section, and had no milk until day 8. It took a while for him to get the hang of the breastfeeding as well. He lost weight for 3 weeks because I just didn't have enough milk for him, no matter what I did -- pumping, cluster feeding, taking fenugreek and brewer's yeast, drinking rivers of water, you name it. In the end, I did supplement with formula because we just had to for his health, and I felt like a failure too. I finally came to realize (with lots of support and encouragement from friends) that no matter what happened with the breastfeeding, I could still provide for my son. We continued doing both breastmilk and formula until I got pregnant again and my son weaned himself between 8 and 9 months. No matter what anyone might say about supplementing, my son WAS a breastfed baby. In the end, it all turned out fine -- he's perfectly healthy (only been sick twice ever with mild colds), and this time with baby #2, I'm able to breastfeed like crazy with no problems at all. There's so much to deal with emotionally and physically anyway with your first baby, that it feels like such a betrayal when your body doesn't do what it's supposed to do! You're still his mom (and I'm sure a wonderful one!) no matter how he ends up being fed.

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A.B.

answers from Boston on

T., I think the most important thing is do not feel guilty!! My first was 2mo early and hospitalized for 5 wks after birth. I was fortunate to be able to pump and freeze a lot during that time. I could only nurse for 8 weeks because of my own health issues. She got the most important immunities in the first six weeks and then she got the nourishment she needed from formula after that. It doesn't help our baby to have you stressed and guilted out or for meal time to be filled with anxiety. That said, I don't think you need to give up on nursing, do what you can, but if he needs more, no harm done!!! I don't know techniques for boosting production, although I know they are out there. I'm sure there are lots of others with that wisdom. I just know the trauma of having a preemie and I hate to see you putting unreal expectations on your self. You both have had a rough beginning, there's no reason to make it harder. If you just love your little man and give him what he needs, you'll all be fine!!

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M.O.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.,
Don't get too down on yourself. Sometimes breastfeeding can just be difficult. Great job on working so hard and being so invested in it for your son. Try to take a bit of the pressure off yourself, that's the hardest part to conquer! Supplementing should help relieve the stress on you and Jack. Give him as much breast milk as you can, and if he's still looking for more go for the formula. Do your best to keep yourself healthy and hydrated to keep your body doing what it needs to do. I had similar trouble with nursing my second and third. It was frustrating but you have to do what's best and sometimes that means reducing the stress first. Good luck to you, keep up the hard work!
M.

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E.S.

answers from Boston on

I had the same problem with my first son. I drank a pot of Mother's Milk tea every day (you can buy it at some grocery stores and places like GNC) and took an herbal supplement called Fenugreek every day (also at GNC). Both are totally safe and were recommended by a lactation consultant. I also took Reglan, a medication usually used for stomach issues, but it increases your levels of prolactin which increases your lactation. My OB was a little hesistant to prescribe it at first, because it can have some pretty bad side effects, but I didn't suffer from any of them and it worked fabulously for me! Don't worry about having to supplement with formula, we did that as well! My husband would feed him formula in the middle of the night while I pumped. It allowed him to be involved in feeding and bond with our son. Good luck with everything, but I think if you tried what I did, that should help somewhat.

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S.D.

answers from Burlington on

Hi T.,
It is really easy to feel like a failure when it comes to nursing and needing to supplement. Don't though! You are doing a great job as a first time mom and doing exactly what your son needs. I too had a hard time with my son in the first few weeks. I supplemented formula, we did Earth's Best, and it did not feel great! But, make sure you are taking care of yourself by getting as much rest as you can, drinking water and eating plenty of food. I would also pump the side that my baby was not nursing on to get more milk. I never was able to pump all that much, but your supply will increase. I also drank Mother's Milk tea by Traditional Medicines. It worked! You need to do whatever it takes to make yourself feel better and know that you are doing a great job! Take care!

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L.M.

answers from Boston on

T.,

First I would highly recommend contacting La Leche League in your area. www.llli.org - Call them and explain what is going on, they will be able to tell you what to do.

I've been told to make sure I eat protein, especially in the morning. And make sur you drink water.

I've also seen postings before of other women asking and someone wrote that they took 2 pills in the morning and at night of Fenugreek and also a liquid pill of iron that also contains vitamin B. I don't know if your prenatal vitamin has iron in it but at my 6 week check up my doctor switched me to a prenatal with iron.

Good Luck,
L. M

D.B.

answers from Boston on

You can try all the wonderful suggestions given by the other posters, and I hope you are successful. The thing I want to address is the guilt - it is normal, but it is self-inflicted. A good mom is someone who does the best thing for her baby. If that means formula, then you have nothing to feel guilty about! I had a breast infection when my son was very small (which was missed by the doctor's office staff because they kept saying I was just impatient and giving up), and I think some combination of less milk production and some blood that my son was ingesting from me cause the problem. My stress level didn't help, but I was intimidated by these people treating me like I was 17 and stupid. My regular pedi was on vaca for several weeks, so that's how the problem developed. My baby only gained 4 ounces in one month, and my regular pediatrician had a fit when she found out what the nurses and the other pedi had been advising me. All of the nutrition went into brain development, thank goodness, and his head was the only thing that grew that month, but the rest of him didn't grow at all! She put that baby right on soy formula and simple fruits and rice cereal, and we made up for lost time. I was so scared and so upset, and he was starving. Ever since, I have advised friends to do what they need to - your goal is a healthy and happy baby, and a healthy and happy you. If I were doing it today, I would use either a good soy formula like ProSoBee, or the new nutritional products developed by the same scientist who developed ProSoBee. The "new" company is 20 years old and makes a wonderful array of products -- in fact, if you don't want to try the kids' product (safe for babies) you could try the adult product, which I bet would help your milk supply. It is totally safe as a prenatal, so it's completely safe for nursing moms. It's food - no drugs, no stimulants, nothing but good solid nutrition. Let me know if you are interested. You have a lot of decisions to make and I don't want to overload you now! But friends of mine who took this product have the healthiest and most robust babies ever, and their babies have not been sick either - and some are going to kindergarten! Good luck whatever you choose! You are a great mom!

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L.P.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.! Don't lose hope you are doing great and can keep going. I can not say enough about the herb Fenugreek. I just had my third baby in April and was having supply issues as well. A friend told me about fenugreek but after I researched it I found that groups like La Leche promote it for increasing milk supply as well. One claim was that it could increase supply up to %900! That didn't happen with me but I am thrilled with what did happen. I would go to Whole Foods or another natural supplement supplier and pick up the capsules. I found an increase in about 2 days that continued to gain. Good luck and congratulations!

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T.M.

answers from Boston on

My sister went through something similar with her preemie, and although I can't provide advice about improving milk supply, it seems you should focus more on accepting yourself and the situation. First, it sounds like you are dealing with a lot just now: newly wed, new mom, premature baby, possibly just learning to stay at home as opposed to work out of the house. That is a lot in one year! It is perfectly normal and natural to have complex and possibly sad feelings about all those changes and the new responsibilty. Even if things were going swimmingly with breast feeding, it's a lot on one woman's plate. So please give yourself a break.

I think you should continue giving the breast milk you can supply and supplementing that with the formula that your son likes and tolerates (which is not so easy to find!). You have NOTHING to feel guilty about if you give your son formula in addition to breast milk. You are a good mother to give your child what he likes and the nutrition he needs - ie, your breast milk plus the formula -; you would be mistaken to put yourself under emotional and physical hardship by forcing the breast feeding issue while possibly depriving your baby of the nutrition he needs. Also, consider that feeding time is a real bonding moment for mother and child. If you are emotionally uneasy during that time (this may sound hokey but it's true) your son will perceive it and possibly take on those feelings as well. (They're little but they have feelings!!!!) I think you would do best to give the little guy the breast milk plus formula and just enjoy the moments, let the guilt and the negativity fall away knowing that you're doing the right thing for him and yourself. You count too in all of this. This time in your lives goes too fast.

About me: I am a 34-year-old mother of an 8-year-old boy who also had misgivings and conflicting feelings about breast feeding when he was newborn. Finally I decided to do what I'm now advising, which was to breast feed him for as long as I could tolerate it, and then switch to a formula he liked. It was the right decision for me.

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N.P.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.,
I so feel for you. I was in the same place. I didn't produce enough milk. I took all suggestions from tons of lactation experts like drink lots of water, take fenugreek, pump inbetween feedings, you name it I did it.
This carried on for months. She would feed every time for about an hour. I felt a prisoner to feeding her and everything revolved around her feeding schedule because it took so long to feed her. So any plans we made I had to work in the hour feeding.
My point is... don't beat yourself up about it. Even breastfeeding her for 2 weeks is extremely beneficial. Whatever you can do is great but you can only do what you can do. I used to get so sad when I would ask for advise from other woman and they would say, "Oh I was like a milking cow. I had so much milk. I would be able to pump 8oz bottles on each breast. Blah, blah." They never understood how hard it was for me as I had such a hard time doing it. You get very emotional about it as you want to do the best for your child. And you know breastfeeding is the best but you can't produce enough. I cried so much about it. And when it finally got to the point where I was breastfeeding her and then having to give a bottle afterwards(5oz) that is when I knew enough was enough. I had held out for 6 months. I loved breastfeeding her but to have 2 oz of breastmilk and then 5 oz of formula was getting ridiculous.
Anyway, I just wanted to share with you what I went through to hopefully ease your mind. It is so stressful and in the end, as long as she is getting nutrients be it through breastmilk or formula she is going to be fine. No, not just fine... GREAT! My husbands siblings (6 of them) were never breastfeed and they are all doctors and lawyers and have a great family bond. So it isn't the end to supplement with formula. It also isn't good for you or your baby to stress over it.
Keep your chin up and know that if you have to supplement both you and your baby are going to be OK. I wish you all the best. There is so much adjustment in the beginning and wondering if you are doing everything right. Asking questions means you are. You are concerned for your child and that makes you a great parent.
Big hug going your way.
N.

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E.2.

answers from Providence on

I am using healthy nursing tea by secrets of tea to increase my breast milk and getting sufficient supply. I'd suggest all moms with low milk flow to try this tea.

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C.E.

answers from Boston on

Hi T.
I am a 46 yr old mother of 3 boys, 16,13 and 10. When my oldest was born I too nursed constantly only to find he was still crying and hungry. As a first time mother I was really upset about the fact that I could not feed my son as best as possible and avoided giving him a bottle for 4 months. But finally my mother, a nurse, said "not every woman makes great breast milk." Alot depends on diet, but you need to be taking in well over the normal 2500 cal/day. I ended up weighing less at my 6 week checkup than I did before I got pregnant. Nursing burns lots of calories. I finally gave in to bottle feeding along with nursing and he became a different baby. The non-stop crying ceased and he slept 6-7 hours at a time. He was much happier and so was I.
This situation was no different for my next 2 boys. I decided not to beat myself up about it and nursed and bottle fed for almost a year with each of them.
You should not be hard on yourself about this. Not only will Jack be happier but you will feel less stressed and be a happier mom yourslef.
Good Luck
C. E.

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A.P.

answers from Providence on

Hi T. -
I'm going to paste the answer I offered to a few others not too long ago. The good news is that in her "so what happened" section, she said that the Reglan worked! Good luck.

Please ask your doctor or nurse/infant warm line about using Reglan. Reglan is a drug given to cancer patients and sometimes to pregnant women suffering from morning sickeness as an anti-nausea drug, and has the unrelated, unexplained side effect of drastically increasing milk supply.
When my kids were about 6 months old my supply dropped. With my daughter (my first) I had been exclusively pumping (we just never got the breast feeding thing down right) and so I could easily see how much I was getting. I went from pumping about 64 ounces a day to about 20 a day for no apparent reason. MY OB prescribed the Reglan and I started on a pretty high dose - a couple of pills a day (can't remember exactly). Within about 3 days I was back up to 64 ounces and more with way less effort than I had ever had.
It was such a pleasure! I was even able to actually breastfeed her some, because I guess it was so easy for her to get the milk too. After just a few days I cut back on the quantity of Reglan and got to the point where I was just taking one pill every few days. I would take a pill, it would be smooth sailing and then when I saw that I was slowing down (usually after a couple days) I would just take another pill.
I can't recommend this enough! Also, in all fairness, there is a trace amount of the drug which is detectable in the milk, but the benefits of that clearly outweighed the negatives - not to mention that the drug is safe for kids anyway. And my kids are older now and perfectly healthy!
So good luck.

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T.U.

answers from New London on

My situation was different than yours where I couldn't produce enough to feed my son from the very beginning. It caused a lot of frustration and stress in me. But some advice that my sons pediatrician mentioned at one visit might apply to your situation; it was that it was better to have a relaxed Mom who formula feeds than a stressed out Mom that breastfeeds. Those words helped me so much, b/c I was so focused on trying to get my body to do something it couldn't do that it was effecting my relationship with my son negatively. The lactation consultant also suggested I try fennugreek to help with milk supply, I would check with a lactation consultant before taking it though. I ended up just going with the formula b/c nothing worked to produce more than a trickle, but it still took a while for me to come to peace with giving him formula. I hope you find what works for you.

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P.T.

answers from Hartford on

Hi T.!

First congratulations on your baby boy!
I too had the same problem, although my daughter was a little older-around 4 months. Make you sure you drink plenty of fluids, and eat good. In addition to that, the more stimulation (sucking/pumping) the more milk will be produced. Be sure your little one is latching properly too, thats important.I learned this when I went to breastfeeding class. I was feeling very guilty and like a failure because I wasnt able to give my daughter enough, but thats the worst thing you can do. If your upset and stressed out, breast feeding will not go smoothly. I ended up having to top off with formula at about 4 1/2 months. It isnt a bad thing to do that. Better to supplement with formula than to let your little one go hungry. My daughter, now 1 1/2 years is very healthy! Also,I know plenty of babies that were just formula fed since birth, and they turned out just fine. You might want to contact a lactating consultant too. I know the one I saw was great and really helped me. Good luck!

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R.R.

answers from Burlington on

It's so hard to be in that situation, and I faced the same issue, but right from the start. I talked with lactation consultants and read a lot and here's what I learned:

1. Try not to stress out about it, that will only diminish your supply.
2. Don't feel guilty! You are doing the best you can and what else can you do?! It's not your fault. You're a great mom for caring so much about trying to give your little one breast milk despite the difficulties.
3. There is nothing evil about formula. If you end up needing to use it, your little guy will do fine, and you can continue to give him breast milk as well. He will still receive its benefits. I use Earth's Best organic formula. You can order in bulk from their website, which is the least expensive way to go.
4. I don't know how often you're feeding, but do it every two hours. Try to do it every 3 hours at night. But make sure you get your sleep too, that will help your milk production. Pump at the times you're not feeding.
5. There are a whole bunch of things to consume that are supposed to help boost milk supply: drinking lots of water, drinking "Mother's Milk" tea, taking fenugreek caplets, eating oatmeal, drinking good beer (home brew type). I tried all of these things. It's hard to know whether it helped, I think the fenugreek did at first. It helps just to try them all though, and at the least you'll know you're doing everything you can.

Finally, just keep putting him to the breast. Frequency is more important than the duration of each feeding.

And for a little perspective, should none of this work: My little guy is 7 months old, and I still give him my ~1.5 ounces of breast milk per feeding, even though he's eating a ton more formula and starting in now on solids. That would be your worst case scenario. Right now it might feel awful to think of not providing him with all of his needs, but you will get beyond that emotionally and realize that all you can do is your best (which is a good lesson for any new parent to learn!).

Good luck and ENJOY your new prize!

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C.R.

answers from Boston on

A quick note- but I echo what someone said about being consistent. I had the same issue early on, and it really takes a couple days of consistency for your body to catch up to demand- and it will. The baby nursing gives nipple stimulation that the pumping does not- so it still helps even if it seems like he's not getting enough at first.

The other most important thing I can recommend to you to increase supply is getting as much sleep as you possibly can. That sleep deprivation, and resulting stress and anxiety can also hinder your ability to produce milk. Any chance husband can take one of the night time feedings for you? Good luck- it WILL get better. :)

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M.M.

answers from Boston on

First off, a word of warning about supplementing with formula... Any time you introduce something other than breastmilk into the equasion it messes with the supply/demand balance of your body.

That said, I know your pain...but I'm told it's normal. Babies often "cluster feed" at the end of the day during the "witching hour" when they tend to be most cranky. I have a 3 month old son who does the same thing by nursing what seems like every five minutes. Actually, come to think of it, it's gotten better now that he's past the 2 mo. mark. (in fact, a lot of things have improved since then!)

If your son has been healthily gaining weight with the 1oz your breasts produce at the end of the day, don't worry about it. If he's two months, then he's probably also doing a lot of "comfort nursing" at the end of the day and doesn't neccessarily NEED the milk. If he did, your body would produce it. DON'T give him formula. If you want to up your production, drink LOTS of water, pump in the evenings, and try an herb called "fenugreek." (with permission from your doc, of course!)

Good luck!

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T.F.

answers from Portland on

Drink lots of water! 8+ glasses a day, more if you are drinking anything caffeinated, as it is dehydrating to your body, maybe more due to the heat outside.

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J.C.

answers from Boston on

First off you are NOT a failure!!!!And 2nd,you are doing a wonderful job!!Nobody said mammahood was easy so dont be so hard on yourself!!There is absoulutly nothing wrong with supplementing w/formula so please stop feeling guilty about it!!Formula is very very nutritious for your little one so keep up the good work and enjoy your baby,if you stress about it he will feel it!!(really)So please stop being so hard on you and do the best you can!He will love you calm and relaxed...breastfed or not.

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T.L.

answers from Boston on

Try More Milk Plus from Motherlove or Fenugreek both work really really well. MMP works overnight and both are all natural to.
Check out our group at www.bigtent/groups/mommies
there is a wealth of information there too!
Gimme a hollar offline if you have any q's!
____@____.com
:)
T.

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