Hello all! I was just writing to seek some advice regarding an issue we've been dealing with lately with my soon-to-be 4 yr old DS.
He's only had a handful of dry nights here and there, and lately was starting to soak through the overnight pull ups we'd been buying. I followed some suggestions mentioned on here and seem to have stopped the constant leaks (those that suggested the Huggies Overnights were a godsend, I feel silly for not having heard of them before..)
However, over the last few weeks I've noticed something that has been somewhat concerning lately, in that he isn't simply having a single accident a night in the early morning hours. Instead, I'm almost certain that he seems to be going a lot of times throughout the night while soundly asleep, albeit in small amounts.
Is this a cause for concern? He's been reliably potty trained during the day for a while, and in fact is usually able to 'hold it' for a long time when awake. I guess I'm just a bit alarmed that he seems to have so little control at night, I always assumed night accidents at his age were more of a one time a night ordeal (since their bladders have matured a bit). We discovered this during a stay at grandmas where he ended up going to bed in just undies, we've since discussed things over with my MIL.
I appreciate any help greatly! Thanks!
Edit - We did check with our pediatrician, who seemed mostly unconcerned about it as DS was negative for UTI's and diabetes (which is common on DH's side of the fam).
Edit#2 - Just to clarify, I totally understand it's not something he can help just yet. I've never once been upset with him, everyone sort of looks at it as just another minor thing, it's no big deal--and he knows this. I'm not so much concerned with the fact that he HAS been having wet nights, it's moreso a concern of HOW it's happening. Is it normal for kids with a bedwetting issue to ''dribble' (my husbands word) small amounts all night? As opposed to just one or two bigger accidents?
I appreciate all the guidance!! It's very reassuring to know we're not alone in dealing with this.
This is a question for his doctor. How do you know he dribbles throughout the night? I suggest most parents wouldn't know if this were happening so we wouldn't know if it was cause for concern. Call his doctor.
Most doctors say don't worry at all about nighttime dryness before age 6 or so. Honestly, some kids just take longer for their bodies to figure it out. Some docs even say age 7 or 8 before you should do anything. I certainly wouldn't worry at all about an almost 4 year old (actually, I have an almost 4 year old myself and she wears a pull up every night - sometimes it's dry, sometimes it's not and I don't even think about it).
I wouldn't worry too much about the fact that he's going multiple times throughout the night. Because diabetes is a family concern, I would make sure to have your doctor regularly checking for that (at least at his annual physical), but I don't think you have a problem otherwise. Nighttime bedwetting is so common that most doctors don't even remotely consider it a problem in a 4 year old.
I was a bed-wetter for a long time... I really don't know when I stopped, or how often I wet the bed.
I remember going on sleep-overs and having the M. put a rubber sheet under me... how humiliating!
I also remember feeling the need to urinate, and dreaming that I had gotten up and gone to the bathroom, except in the dream, I sat on the toilet lid and wet... and woke up to find I had wet the bed.
Unfortunately, this was before there were things such as depends, or overnight disposable briefs......
It takes some time for some kids to physically mature enough to stop wetting at night, unfortunately.
It takes some kids until they are 11 or 12 yrs old before they can stay dry through the night.
Our son was 7 when we finally finished with pullups at night but a lot of his friends took longer.
It's really common and there is nothing to do but wait until his body matures.
Getting them up to use the bathroom just makes everyone tired and miserable.
Ask your parents or you in laws about how old you (and Hubby) were when you stayed dry through the night.
Often our kids follow the same patterns we had at that age.
We just don't remember it.
This is so common. When my daughter was in 5th grade her class went on an overnight field trip. This problem is common enough that the school nurse addressed this concern during an information session. Google bed wetting....it is not uncommon for 12 year olds to have this issue and some kids even wet their bed into their teen years.
L.,
Night Time "training" is NOT like day time training. His body is NOT yet ready for night time training. I'm sorry. I know many people truly feel that if you are day time potty trained, then night time should occur at the same time. It does NOT for all.
One of my girlfriend's son - who is now 13 - stays at our home A LOT - it was JUST this year that the night time wetting stopped. And this was after medication, alarms, waking him, etc. We (yes we because he and his brother can spend as much as 2 weeks a month at our home while she is out of town working) decided to let it go - it will be when his body is ready - right before he turned 13 - his body FINALLY said "done"...and VIOLA!! No more Overnights...no more hiding his night time underwear in the linen closet.
With this personal experience - I can tell you - DO NOT get upset with him. He cannot control it. DO NOT yell. DO NOT punish. Just keep the Overnights available and press on. His body will do it when it's ready.
I'm not clear on how you know it's a bunch of small amounts in separate incidents? Are you checking him a lot at night? I'd be more worried about disrupting his sleep.
This is entirely developmental. Wait it out. My son was still doing this at 7 and 8 and so we actually saw a pediatric urologist who assured us a lot of kids (especially boys) take many years to be reliably dry at night. We actually followed his offer of medication - one pill at night and all was well. My son stopped at 10, the problem came back in a few months, so he went back on the meds until about age 12. It's not something you deal with at 4 or 5 by any means - but it's an option down the road. I'm not a big fan of overmedicating kids by any means, but this was the only way he could have a social life with sleepovers and the only way he could get a good night's sleep.
So your son sounds completely and totally normal. Ignore it and just find the best, most absorbent and leakproof nighttime products that fit his body.
How would you know he goes small amounts several times during the night? Some kids just do not have nighttime control until much older.
He's asleep NOT in control of his body. He goes to sleep and those muscles relax and urine comes out. If you wake him up to go to the bathroom guess what? He tenses up and starts holding it and doesn't need to go. Then as soon as he's back asleep urine comes out.
It's a brain thing. One day it's not there and then over a few days and he's dry 99% of the time at night.
You just have to wait it out. THERE IS NOTHING THAT MAKES THIS CHEMICAL IN THE BRAIN HAPPEN...it happens when it happens.
If it makes you feel any better, my oldest was daytime trained at 2 (the month she turned 2), and wasn't night-time trained until the month she turned 5. Worse, her little sister (also daytime trained at 2) was able to stay dry at night at the same time as she was daytime trained. So she didn't need diapers at night, but her big sister did. Big sister, who was practically born as a 40 year old (super mature, always), was so irritated by this! We kept assuring her that as soon as her body was ready, it would happen for her, too. And sure enough, it did. My girls' cousin, who is a boy, had night time accidents until he was 8. So did my husband. It is what it is, you know? It will happen when it happens. Night time potty training is not something kids have any control over whatsoever. It's frustrating for the child and for the parents, but there's truly nothing you can or should do about it at this age.
In my opinion I think you should let him wet the bed and be uncomfortable for that little period of time. It gives him the "physical" feeling of "hey, I just pee'd the bed, dam". Put a plastic cover to save the mattress, let the boy pee and wake up and have a change of pj's ready, make him change into them. Throw a towels on the wetspot or teach him to do it himself. If they learn the drill, they will learn to wake up to the response to pee. Worked for my weak blattered son back in the day.
