Lovies

Like the boy in Puff the Magic Dragon, over time he'll just stop needing them so much. I wouldn't worry about it at all :)

I don't think we ever outgrow lovies. We just begin changing what they are. It is a transition tool, such as from awake to asleep, etc. I say let him have them and he'll move on when he's ready. It will make him a kinder person.

S.
P/S He sounds like a sweet child and reminds me of my first son. He too had several lovies. He outgrew them, but kept the blanket because of sweet memories attached to it. He's now a wonderful, loving husband and father of two very sweet boys (in addition to being a black belt in Karate.) And I'm not even biased ;)

My son had "Kitty" in his bed w/ him till he was about 9 then he started hiding him when friends came over and now since he was 11 kitty sleeps in his closet on the shelf and if anyone touches kitty he gets really defensive...I think kitty will have a special home in his house as an adult LOL!

Hi S., My younger daughter is in her mid 20's, married, and is pregnant for her 2nd child. She still buys blankets that have silk bindings because it comforts her. Truly, this is not a big issue. Sometimes as parents we have to chose our battles. Good luck.

My 10 year old twin boys have their beds full of stuffed animals, I have never thought anything of it. When the time is right for them they will clear them out. I think my daughter was about 12 when she started to put most of hers in her closet. Eventually she gave me most of her stuffed animals and said she didn't want them.They grow up in their own good time.

I wouldn't worry about it. It's not like he has to have them with him 24/7 and they are inhibiting his daily functions. He'll out grow them on his own.

If he just sleeps with them at home, there is nothing wrong. It gives your son some security. My 31 yo son still collects stuffed animals, and he will not throw out his first stuffed dog Muffy who has been through a lot. My son is happily married and works full time.

I agree with some of the other ladies...keep them! How comforting is your own bed when you come home from vacay? My niece is twenty-something and still has her handmade baby quilt in her bed...or what's left of it.

I think it's perfectly healthy...maybe think of a more 'manly' name for them...LOL

no, never too old for security.

I don't think there is an ever too old. I, like another poster, still sleep holding onto an extra pillow. Your son seems to know this is a personal thing since he leaves them for sleepovers. I think as long as it is helping him sleep, he will decide when it is time to get rid of the,.

I'm 25, married with a son of my own and I still sleep with a stuffed animal at night....I wouldn't take them away until he is ready.

I don't think 8 is too old. My brother had a snoopy for a long time. Especially since your son doesn't need it at sleepovers. I would just let him enjoy it for as long as he likes. I am sure he won't bring it away to college!

Hi S.,
You are never too old for a lovie! I still have my blankie from my childhood and I'm 25 and married with two children. It's packed away now because my husband lovingly threatened to get rid of it. ;) My sisters (20 and 22) both have their blankies as well (or what's left of them). I read a study once that said children who take security objects to college with them have a better success rate with homesickness and adjusting to college. He'll know when it's time to leave the lovies behind. God bless!

Too cute...I have 2 lovey blankets that I call my goggies and they are still in my closet (I even took them to college with me!). My 2 year old calls his blanket a goggy now as well. We are just now starting to limit where he can take his blanket (restaurant no, grocery shopping yes), but I won't ever take it away from him.

Hi S.,
I had a stuffed animal in my bed until I was 18, and I still own my very first teddy!I am still very attached to all of my stuffed animals(I'm 31 now).
I would let your son decided when it is time to let go of his "lovies". It sounds to me that he is still vey emotionally attached to them. I believe that one is never to old to have a "lovie"
C. O.

I sleep with an extra pillow instead of a lovie these days. My friends ex still had what's left of his, a doll head he kept under his pillow. But thats a little strange. And I'm hope my daughter takes one of the toys I've made to collage.

:) A. H

S.; none of us like to be alone at night, in fact some of us sleep with pillows and hug it, some of us have to sleep with someone else beside us, we all have lovies, of some sort, iwould think its ok, nothing wrong with a male knowing his emotions, and caring for it, it will make a better daddy some day, my teens will have some favorite stuffed animal on their bed, and yet they dont cuddle with it, they stil have things, that get thrown and toyed with with the cat, its ok, if you want, offer to put them on a shelf, so he can have them and not sleep with them if it bothersome to you , im sure its just his way of not being alone, just find balance, and be happy, D. s

I'm 29 and I only stopped sleeping with my lovie recently as he's falling apart. :)

I slept with my Blankie until I left hope at 18! I didn't really "need" it I just liked it. I wouldn't make a big deal out of it!
Blessings, K.

I'm not even going to tell you how old my kids are...LOL and their beds are covered with all kinds of stuffed sleep friends. I wouldn't even give it a second thought.

haha i still have mine.. lol well i keep a stuffed elephant by my bed.. lol

i wouldnt worry about it.

Hi S.:

Don't worry about Lovies. My son is 10 and he still has stuffed toys that he takes to bed. I don't think there is anything wrong with that. We all sometimes just need someone or something there with us as a comfort, so I wouldn't worry about him having a special animal or toy that he takes to bed. He will grow out of it all by himself.
A.

If he were an 8yr old GIRL would you be concerned about sleeping with lovies?

He's a child. Let him be a child. If he still needs the comfort of his stuffed animals at night there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

i would say let him have it. My stepson is 7, and still carries the blanket with him in the morning, and at bedtime. he can't have stuffed animal on the bed because of allergies. I know I always had animals on my bed. and now, they sit on the headboard of my bed, instead of in my bed with me. I will say though when my husband goes out of town, one of the animals normally ends up in bed. Just to have something to curl up with.

I took mine off to college, and a lot of other kids had something as well at college. I wouldn't worry about it. When he is ready, and if he is ever ready he will give them up. but there isn't anything to say a stuffed animal at bed it bad

You're never too old......

Personally, I say don't worry about it. I have a 10 yr. old boy, who is still very attached to his night-time teddy. He, like your son, doesn't take it for sleepovers, in fact he downright refuses to do so. Also, he has nothing to do w/it at any other time of the day. He, too, is very advanced in all other ways. These are the reasons I choose not to make an issue of it or worry about it. If it's what it takes for him to feel comfy at night...then so be it. Similar to a favorite pillow or your comfy jammies. Ha, had a daughter who slept w/her blankie right up through her senior year in high school! Sooner or later, he'll choose to give it up. Until then...no worries! :-)

Hi S.,

All three of my boys still take something special to bed with them. they are 15, 13 and 8.

S.

My 10 year old boy went away to camp and all of the boys brought something for their 'bed', mostly stuffed animals. Totally age appropiate. I just wouldn't call it a lovie though.....

I have a 19 year old who still loves his very worn stuffed (that's putting it lightly) dog. He's in the Air Force. But he's home on a week's leave as we speak and that dog is up on his bed.
I have a 26 year old who still rubs the satin siding to his baby blanket, of which there are still pieces of it attached. It's hilarious to catch him rubbing his blanky.

The middle one, as far as I know, doesn't do anything remotely like it but his wife always, even on their honeymoon, had her blanky with her.

And just FYI, all 3 of my sons are 2nd degree black belts. So they aren't mama's boys. They love their mom, but they're very well adjusted.

In conclusion, there's nothing wrong with having lovies around and no age limit. I'm 55 and I still have a couple of mine around, AND my favorite blanket as a little kid.

Hi S.,
I'll probably let my kids have their blankies until they're ready to get rid of them. The older they get the less they carry them around. I don't think they'll be going to college with them....lol. I wouldn't worry about it especially if he doesn't need them all the time.
Chris

He may need the stuffed animals as a reference point, to tell him where he is in the bed.

Children with sensory processing challenges often don't know, internally, where their bodies are in space. It's called proprioception (you can google the term). When an individual's proprioception is "off" (missing), they have to rely on another sense to tell them where they are, and the eyes and vision are used to tell them where they are.

Bedtime for a child with sensory processing challenges can be a nightmare (pun intended), because they have to shut off their most relied upon sense (their vision).

Sleeping with mom and dad or a sibling helps them, because they know where they are now because they can use mom and dad as a reference point to tell them where they are even with their vision shut off with their eyes closed.

The stuffed animals may be a compensation for a poor sense of proprioception -- does he sleep with someone at sleep overs, a friend or a cousin to help him know where he is?

A GREAT book (please don't let the title scare you, okay) is "The Fabric of Autism," by Judith Bluestone -- she explains all the sensory stuff and the emotional coping and modulating, too, which we tend to always see in autism, but sometimes see in kids who are not on the autism spectrum. See if your library can get it -- it'll be an interesting read and you may get some good ideas from it, even though your boy is not autistic.

If that is his comfort don't take it away. I still sleep with my teddy bear and I am 36 :) A pillow or my husband works to cuddle too. Dont worry and don't rush him he will move on when he is ready.

Absolutely not. This is very normal and healthy.

Hi. My niece is 11 and still sleeps with lots of stuffed animals on her bed. I remember sleeping with my favorites well through grade school. I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all. It's wonderful that he has a sensitive heart.

My sons are 6 and 9..they still have their favorite stuffed animals to sleep with.

You can't ever get too old for lovies can you? I never did outgrow mine until I had my husband, and then my babies as they came. It is always so satisfying to have something (if you don't have someone) to snuggle up to as you sleep. It's comforting and comfortable, and, personally, I don't see anything wrong with it as long as he likes it.

Enjoy your baby (to their mamas they never really do grow up)!

Keep smiling...:)

My son was 17 before he finally decided he didn't need his "doggie" in bed with him anymore. Made me feel worse than it did him. It's his private time and space, don't worry about him.

S.