Lots of Potty Accidents, Does This Mean We Will Move Forward Soon?

J.--
She is really young to be potty training. My daughter asked at 20 months and I told her not yet I did put her in pull ups so if she wanted to use it-- she could(it was this time of year and I just wasn't going to deal with it with the holidays.) After Christmas I kept her in pull ups for a few days and worked on getting her to the potty. She wanted panties and she was trained a little before her second birthday.

Mother of 2 boys and a girl

I know you don't want to hear it, but she's way too young. Sorry. Her body can't do what you are asking her to do right now. She just. Can't.

Editing... I think we all get that you don't want criticism... but the fact is, she is PHYSICALLY too young. Her mind may be on board with you, but the fact that she is having regressions shows that as hard as she tries, her body can't do what you are asking, which is actually going to set her up for failure. Does that make sense? She may be totally on board, but what you are asking her to do, and what she may WANT her body to do... is impossible at her age and her body's development.

Honestly, talk to your doctor, if you haven't already. You are asking for bladder infections, hurt feelings, and poor self esteem. I get where you are coming from but on this one, you are just going to have to wait for her body to catch up to her mind. :(

My daughter is 20 months old and we are going thru the same thing. We introduced the potty to her at 12 months, so she knew what it was. Then at about 18 months, she started telling me she had to use it. So we started the potty training ritual. But I've found that she has good days, and she has bad days. The bad days usually have something going on, whether she's tired, doesn't feel good, or she's learned something new. I know it's frustrating, but she will get it. We just have to be patient, and I believe that at the age they are, for them to be able to acknowledge that they have to go is a huge step in the right direction. It may take time, but trust me, she is definately on the right track.

If she is truly ready, throw out the diapers and put her in underwear. A child that is potty-trained gets their own pants down, gets on the potty, goes, mostly wipes by themselves, and pulls up their pants. After they have this down, they will begin to tell you when they have to go and then just go do it. A child that is pull-up/training pant trained does what you are describing. Uses the potty when they want, and then goes in their pants when they don't feel like going on the potty. Honestly I think training pants and pull-ups are a huge waste of money and just drag the process out. Accidents will happen while you are training, but you just clean them up and move on. A child that is ready can be fully trained in less than a week in underwear. I don't understand all the people that "trained" in months and months. If you feel your daughter is ready, put her in underwear. If the number of accidents goes down over the week and she is doing this all on her own, then you are right she is ready. If she is peeing/pooping herself all day with no end in sight and can care less that she is soiled, then what about that says "mom, I'm ready to be trained."? Many times kids ask and tell mom they need to potty, but still aren't ready. It is just something new and exciting, sounds like the novelty of the potty is wearing off for her now and that why she has no interest and is resisting.

Personally, I think she is WAY too young to be pushing the potty training. She will let you know when she is ready and responding to HER cues is my best advice. My experience is that pushing too soon can actually cause regression in this area down the line. Be patient and it will happen. I would not ditch the diapers yet and when its convenient, let her go bare bottom and see if she has more interest. Otherwise, start the process again when she is older and ready. Most little ones are not potty trained until age 3 on average.
Good luck!

Get rid of the diapers. Put her in underpants, but I have to agree with all the other posters...she is way to young and clearly NOT ready. When you train too young, it takes sooo much longer. Just wait until she is ready. LOL on your pampers comment:)

EDIT:J., I don't think anyone is criticizing you. We are all just stating our opinions. I agree with Elizabeth's Edited resonse. Why are you in such a rush for her to be potty trained? She's not even 2!

A last resort might be to try a little reverse psychology. Tell her you don't think she's ready for potty training (yes, this method is actually suggested in a potty training manual for parents who are struggling!) How often do our kids want to prove us wrong? All the time, right?

Other than that, I have no tricks up my sleeve. You could always let her be the independent one and allow her to take the lead and you follow her actions and encourage HER efforts (as opposed to trying to get her to do what YOU want her to do)...or you could keep 'helping her to learn' and deal with the frustration for weeks and months.

And...when is baby #2 due? Soon? Maybe she senses that and that might explain her regression.

My daughter did the exact same thing at 19 months. She was pretty much trained then one day she just stop using the potty. I think she was to young to really understand or care about using the potty. I just kept asking her, and she would occasionally go potty. Around 25/26 months she started to use the potty more regularly, and she was totally trained at 26 months. I think 19 months is a bit young. Continue to ask her if she wants to go, but do not make it a big issue. She will probably be trained a few months after her second Birthday.

Hi J. your daughter is still very young. Things will get better in time. So be patient some kids are older and aren't doing as well as she is.

You are right-this is a process. The world will never know why a child can do so well with potty training only to turn back ;) But, I am kind of going thru the same thing with child #2. I learned from my 1st that the dreaded words are true which is that they learn at their own pace. They set the pace for themselves and we just have to follow. Stickers and prizes are good but sometimes don't always work. My 2nd started out great. I think we started training him about 29 months because that was when he showed us signs that he was interested. We thought it was going to be easy because he was doing great. But now, he is almost 34 months and REFUSES to go on the potty. It's aggervating, but I know that he will go when he's ready. My daughter struggled for 9 months and then about a week before she turned 3 she started to stay dry for long periods of time. We encouraged her to go on the toilet and within a few days she said goodbye to diapers. That may seem late to some people but when I waited on her, I avoided a lot of frustration and tension. I would say to stand back and let her do her thing for a little bit to see where she's at. If she refuses to go on the toilet, re-introduce the awards. If that doesn't work, it's probably because she's not ready. They say that children have to be ready mentally, physically and all that jazz ;) It'll happen! I know it because of my oldest and I'm hanging on to that positive thought for my youngest :) Good luck!