Okay Moms, here it goes...
Last night hubby and I got a little frisky. The romantic-comedy movie on the couch resulted in a long multi-position roll in the hay. It's been quite a while honestly and was nice at the time, but now I am a bit freaked out. When everything was said and done, our protection was left inside, pretty deeply. We are not sure when it came off and had to pull it out. SHOULD I BE FREAKING OUT?
As a bit of history, my lovely son was born in September and is now 5.5 months old. I am exclusively breastfeeding (upwards of 24 ozes per day) and we have been slowly adding baby foods to his menu, but he definately loves ma-ma's milk and still drinks very greedily. I know that if you are not nursing every 2 hours during the day or 4 hour intervals at night, that BF-ing is not a guarenteed protection and I am not on that type of schedule. We know though that BFing is not a reliable "protection" method (especially since I have 2 siblings that are living proof of that!!) and that is why we cover up. I've been under a ton of stress at work and that has also been messing with my milk so that is another strike against its possible protection benefit. I also know that last week seemed to be ladies week for PMS/MS in the office. I still have not had any kind of cycle, although I had some light spotting back in the very beginning of January. I really haven't been interested in sex or poor hubby and having two consecutive nights of loving was a huge release for each of us. I'm thinking my interest is/was due to a change in hormones (like an egg release?!?) and I'm even more stressed now!!
So ladies, what do you think?? Am I in trouble?? What steps (other than more careful love sessions) should I take??
Thanks.
~C.
PS. We used a combination charting/rhythm method with condoms for about 18 months after our daughter's birth before deciding to ditch the protection so we could have our son so, if I was actually menstrating, this would not be so concerning.
I want to thank everyone for the kind words and encouragement. Some folks even had me in stitches laughing. Yes, I finally got some rest with all the snow days and sonny boy gave me some decent sleep - two nights in a row! (Needless to say, that did not last long!) I guess maybe it made us both a little frisky. I have never had anything like this happen in the 15 years that my husband and I have been together. (Yes, we are HS sweethearts) We have always thought we would have 3 children. I like the 2 year spacing between our little girl and our son, but as others have pointed out, children are really God's will. I talked with Hubby about PlanB and he said it wasn't necessary so I guess we are letting things play out. He said he does not feel there is a concern as the condom seemed to be full (his words). This conversation alone relieved a bunch of my angst - both on the coverage aspect and the growing family part. As for the light spotting in January, I had tested once in January and again in February and was not preggers either time. I've been a bit nervous at not having started menstrating because with my daughter, I did not get any of the "benefits" of BF-ing. I bled for nearly 12 weeks straight postpartum with my daughter and then immediately went right into a regular cycle. The gyn indicated that the extended bleeding was most likely due to a cycle (or two) immediately following the postpartum recovery period. My recovery with my son has been very very different with only about 4 weeks of postpartum bleeding and no cycling yet. And so Hubby and I wait till next month...
Relax- what is done is done. You are probably fine, but I don't think anyone can promise you that. Maybe you guys need to do this more often so it doesn't get so crazy! LOL!
Breathe. Our children are spaced between 2 and 3 years and we used breastfeeding exclusively, especially during the early months, but also after I nursed less frequently. I only had 2 menstral cycles over about 12 years because of this. We didn't mess with birth control; we wanted children. I did pretty much nurse on demand, so there is a chance if you aren't that you could be pregnant. You might want to take a test, because light spotting in Jan. could be implantation bleeding (but not necessarily), and if so your roll in the hay won't have mattered. Maybe your greater interest was because you had some rest, and really needed your husband...not a bad thing and actually kind of lovely :) Rhythm method's hard (impossible?) to do if not menstrating. Talk with your husband about what he thinks about this, I know having children close together seems like it might be challenging, but many do, and are o.k. Its likely that you aren't pregnant, though. Blessings either way.
'
LOL!!! Chill Girlfriend!!! All will be well :-) Odds are that you are not pregnant but if you are, you know that the two of you have all you need to parent a 3rd child. This being said, maybe it is time to think about additional BC methods? At least until your cycle returns to a predictable pattern.
Hugs,
R
As another mom said the mini pill can be taken when you are nursing without causing any issues with you, your milk or your little guy... I started on it after my 6 week check-up (well it was a week late, because I had to reschedual my appointment since my cycle returned before the first appointment).
It doesn't matter what kind of protection you use or don't use... anytime you have a roll in the hay there is a chance of pregnancy. My 2nd & 3rd kid are only 15 mo apart... and they are really close. They look out for eachother in so many ways, yes they argue like normal kids/siblings do, but they can be found sleeping in the same room about 4x a week even though they have different bedrooms. Also, they always ask where the other is & how much longer they will be gone... Mondays are my 4 yr old son's worst day... my 5 yr old dauhter has school, but preschool is closed that day - so he has to be home all day w/ just the 2 yr old brother... and for him that's no fun cause he really wants his sister.
All in all it was scary when I first found out I was pregnant and had a 6 mo old. We laught now that we have Irish twins (babies born within 18 mo of eachother) and they are both red heads. I'm not saying it's always easy, but being a parent isn't always easy - you do find a way of doing things and it all works out great in the end.
That being said, most likely you will be find. I've never had it happen to me... I figure I've been married 15 yrs - if it happens it happens & I hate the feel of the raincoat, so they don't get used. Sorry - just me I guess, but I've been that way since we started dating when I was 16 yrs old. They have been given to us & they just sit in a basket on top of the china cabint for whatever reason.
Good luck - but personally I wouldn't stress about it... what is done is done & it sounds like you have enough stress in your life to be worried if you were blessed with another child or not.
I'm not sure what to say, or advice to give. I think it's great that you and your husband got your intimacy back! It shows to bring you closer and healthier together. Would it be bad if you got pregnant? I have a friend that's a renowned lactation consultant and she could answer more of your questions with nursing, hormones, pregnancy etc. her link is...
From what I've heard, you should never use breast feeding as a form of birth control. But I'm relieved to hear I'm not the only one who "lost" a condom - so stressful!!
God won't give you more than you can handle - you will get through this!!
Good luck!
Hi C.,
The last thing you need is more stress! It is very possible for you to get pregnant now, so you might make an appointment with your ob/gyn to see what other bc options are right for you. There are a few that go well with breastfeeding that would give you better protection. It would be worth it not to stress about the sex! Good Luck.
J.
Just in case, if you don't want to get pregnant, and you don't have religious/philosophical objections, get PlanB. You don't have to have a script and it's available at any pharmacy. It's best when used within the first 24 hours, and decreasingly effective through 72 hours after conception.
You can also basically OD on vit.C. 6000IU/day for a week can help bring on menstruation.
You don't have to breastfeed THAT much to suppress ovulation. It's usually more like every 3-4 hours during the day and 5-6 at night.
Start charting cycles with the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" so you know when you need to use a condom and when you're safe not to.
Dear C., I am not an expert but I would think if you have not had a period you may be ok. Try not to stress out. I HAVE learned one thing in my life and it is that WE do not make the plans. Grandma Mary (mom of 5)
Ok I hate to scare you ... but I'm living proof that breastfeeding ISN'T good birth control LOL I'm 10 1/2 months younger than my sister :)
However I'd say the chances of you getting pregnant are pretty slim. But you might want to call a nurse advice line or your ob/gyn ASAP to see what options you have if you really don't want to be pregnant again for a while. I don't know if the morning after pill would be an option or not. But the BEST place for that information is a doctor or nurse.
Good luck :)
It is possible, but not likely. However, if you are really worried about it, you can always take the morning after pill (Plan B). It's non prescription but you get it from the pharmacist. As of two years ago it is safe to take while breastfeeding according to my ob/gyn and pharmacist, but will possible reduce your milk supply. So if you decide to take it you would want to do the things you do to increase milk supply like extra nursing/pumping, extra water, possibly fenugreek. It has to be taken within 72 hours, the sooner the better. I would double check its safety with my doctor first, since things are always changing. I had the exact same thing happen while I was waiting for my IUD appointment to roll around, and that is the option my doctor gave to me. I was already having regular periods though, and the accident happened right when I should have been ovulating. So I decided to take it since my son was only 4 1/2 mos old.
K first of all I have had that happen to me (having to fish the condom out) and it never resulted in a pregnancy. So most likely it came off when you guys were done and he pulled out. Second I BF both my babies and even after they were sleeping through the night and eating some table food I still didn't get my period back until my first was 12 months and actually my second is 13 months, I've been done nursing for 2 weeks now and I still haven't gotten my period back. So most likely you aren't getting your period back for a while still. With all that said there is still the chance of pregnancy if you are ovulating right now. So you should wait about 2 weeks and then take a pregnancy test. Third if you are worried about this happening again you should look into the mini pill. It's birth control you can take while BF. I took it after my first and it doesn't mess with your milk supply or hurt the baby. Good luck and let us know what happens.
If you REALLY do not want to be pregnant I would consult a doctor ASAP.
You have two options: Plan B pill, which may mess up your milk supply or getting a copper IUD inserted ASAP (this works within a couple of days of unprotected sex). The former is available without a prescription at most pharmacies, the latter you might have to see planned parenthood, if your OB/GYN doesn't do this for emergency contraception.
Good luck!
