hi R.,
I'm sorry to hear about your child.
My daughter was diagnosed with reflux (mostly silent i.e. non visible) and failure-to-thrive when we moved to MN when she was about 9 months old. Our pediatrician, Dr Michael Hobbs in Saint Louis Park,(great doctor!)) had us go to the Fairview Childrens Hospital pediatric GI unit, Dr. Jane (I think it's Jane - dont' have her name in front of me here) Schwartzenberg. It turned out that we saw Dr. Deborah Goldman for a year (in same dept) because things got acute when my daughter got a tummy bug and Dr hobbs felt we had to be hospitalized - and Goldman was the doctor on duty when we went in. We spent 10 days at the hospital and she got a feeding tube (a GI-tube) put in her stomach so that we could put in the food she needed - and refused to eat herself. Wow - what a difference! I never realized how much i struggled with getting her to take her bottle.
Needless to saw it brought us new issues and worries but at least we had more control of inputs and were not dependent on her (my daughter) to eat(for example we could drip feed her while she was asleep) I knew she was getting food and I had a way of being able to give her her medicines.
One year later now, at 23 months, she still is primarily fed thru her g-tube, but she's now in 20% for height and weight, her reflux seems to be finally retreating and we go to feeding therapy to work on learning to eat orally.
A longer story then you asked for so the short version is: I'd strongly recommend Dr Schwartzenberg at the Fairview Children's Hospital. And Dr Goldman did well for us too for.
Good luck,
K.