Looking for a Counseling Referral for an (Almost) 3 Yr Old Boy

Wow! First off with him leaving with no advance notice and filing for divorce. I hate to be the first to say it but I would take him in to your physician or pediatrician and have him checked. This man (I'm sure you thought you knew) is certainly acting weird. Speak to your lawyer and get some legal advise, I'm sure and do hope he will lead you in the right direction or have him back in court. As for his access time I would try and deter that until you have some clarification on whats' going on. Obviously he didn't do this when he was at home. I would certainly have some questions and be going out of my mind. If you don't send them when he wants them, he may take you back to court and maybe then something will come about once it is said that this is whats' going on. Why does he want to bath with your 2yr.old boy. Does he play a part in the 1yr olds life as well.
Don't wait a minute longer check things out and report it to the proper authorities if this is how stronly you feel. I wish you well, but much more your 2yr old when this comes back to him in time, when he can explain. Keep up with the questions but not to much or he will tire of it very quickly.
Take care and try and keep yourself focused on yourself and the children. They are now your first priority.

Take him to his pediatrician first and have him checked out physically. But even if there is no physical evidence, take him to a counselor. His pediatrician or your HMO should be able to refer you to a counselor or social worker. I would also try to deter your ex-husband from seeing the kids until you have this figured out.

I agree with another mom - do not leave your kids alone with your ex. Get a good lawyer, get your son to the peditrician (who might be able to refer you to someone and have it covered by insurance). Good luck.

I am trying to understand if you are really referring to the tummy or if you are simulating something else that I am unsure of if we are allowed to discuss on mamasource. If that is so you right to feel disgusted and should get help to identify if this is true or not. My son identified a sore mark on his 'tummy'as being done by daddy and he too at the time lacked verbal skills to be more articulate. Long story short, we were referred to someone who works with anatomically correct dolls and it was probably something that did not happen which I hope is your case.I however divorced the man anyway as there were a lot of other weird issues. The HMO can direct you to a group, or organization or specific doctor to help you. If you feel uncomfortable insist on another. This is your baby and you care so much. And we need to protect our babies.

You need to seek someone immediately. Whether it's at a church or religious affiliate, crisis center or attorney. This cannot go on.
###-###-#### I googled crisis centers in schaumburg this is one number that appeared. I'm not sure if they can help, but someone needs to talk to you and your son and he needs to stop seeing his father for the time being. If he is abusing him, it will scar him for life and you cannot afford to have that happen. Good luck.

I would take him right to the pediatrician and then call a lawyer today.
While his memory is fresh. Make sure it is recorded.

I agree with the advice you've gotten. Mommy instincts should not be ignored. Taking him to a pediatrician followed by a psychologist that specializes in children. My Mom actually does this for a living in the DC area, and she uses play to find out what is really going on so it's not invasive and actually fun for the child. Hopefully it's nothing but it's important to get to the bottom of what's going on and, pending what the psychologist thinks, you may need to have a group session w/ your ex to define what boundaries are appropriate. Obviously if there's something sinister going on, you'll know and can take the necessary steps. What a scary situation - you are in my thoughts or prayers.

DO NOT let your children alone with your ex. Get an attorney and tell them what your son said. If they are being sexually abused, do not let them be with your ex. You can go to court and you dont have to give the kids to him if this is whats going on and it does sound like it. I would have to refrain from killing him, but i would never ever let my kids with him again, since it sounds like he is sick.

I didn't read the responses, but trust your gut. It doesn't sound good. Too many red flags, and like you said, things that shouldn't have come up since he doesn't sleep or bathe there. If possibly the kids shouldn't be alone with him. I hope the lawyer calls immediatley and you can get a quick restraining order. I'm so so sorry!!! Praise your son that he shared info with you. Reassure him you're there for him and he can tell you anything, and that telling is the right thing to do.

Dr. Kathy Zachary is fantastic
###-###-#### x325
Personal Growth Associates
919 N. Plum Grove Road, Suite C
Schaumburg, Illinois 60173

http://www.personalgrowthassoc.com/about.html
and
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_detail.php...

ETA: I agree, call the pediatrician today