Lock Down, Lay Down

He k back in the 50s we had drills that had us hiding under desks just in case of nuclear attack. So you see things have not changed much.

oh yeah they have this drill and the first time it made my daughter nervous but then it became protocal. The fire drill made her nervous and scared too but its just something she has to understand and get used to. They have different alarms and "codes" so they know what to do. I think in the event of a shooter they dont sound an alarm they have another way of communicating total lock down. My kids school also locks down totally after the school bell and you have to buzz to get in and provide identification at the front desk. There are also have individual sections for each grade that they call pods and each pod has a heavy duty door that can close itself off from the rest of the main building and lock so that way the shooter wouldnt be able to access the multiple rooms behind it. Then they have their normal tornado drill and fire drill. He will get used to it just let him know its just to protect incase anything were to happen and its a good thing.

As a kid we had tornado drills. My parents had nuclear bomb drills. My (California) kids have had earthquake and "shelter in place" drills (for chemical exposure, oil refineries nearby.)
NOTHING HAS CHANGED. Life is scary, bad stuff sometimes, but rarely, happens. As a parent I just keep assuring and reassuring my kids that we prepare for the worst but it is very, VERY unlikely these things will ever happen to us.
Be the adult, the parent, and don't let them see or hear or feel your own fears.

yes. My daughters first grade class had a drill.. where all 25 kids were standing in the bathroom ...one single toilet tiny bathroom.. with the teacher standing in front of the bathroom door. my daughter was not scared by the drill. but I cant imagine being a teacher in this situation.. ... even if the kdis "don't get it" don't really understand what they are doing and why they are doing it... the teachers do.. the teachers know about columbine,, newtown.. and all the other places.

My daughter said that they would hide in case of a bad guy.. she knew the difference between code red and code yellow.

I think her teacher did a good job of explaining the drill. to first graders.. without scaring them. they practiced one day just their class.. then the next week.. they had a entire school drill. the school takes safety very seriously. and the principal comes around and checks each classroom.

My daughter was in first grade last year.. she was in class on the day of the newtown school shooting. It broke my heart to look at the pix of those first graders that were killed.. kids that look just like my kid. I was so afraid the school would try to discuss the tragedy in class. I emailed the principal and the teacher and said I did not want my daughter to know what happened in newtown. I think a lot of parents sent similar emails. we got a note from the principal saying that they would not discuss the shooting.. but questions from older students would be addressed as needed.. I was so relieved when our teacher sent home an email on the first day back to school after the shooting.. saying that the kids were fine.. no one mentioned the shooting.. not a single child in our first grade class knew what happened and it was neve discussed. ...

Yes we do. I've been a sub over 12 yrs and we've had these drills in the last 3-4 yrs.

I agree its scary for the children. We do prep the children that it will happen so they are not frightened at the time. The have to sit at the desk quietly with me with lights out and blinds closed. I do attendance check on computer.

Then I whisper to them and talk about being quiet, assure them they are ok. It's not fun for teachers to go through this either but its now a part of life.

When I was in elementary school, we had bomb drills and we had to get under our desks.

Just assure your child that we are all trying to make sure they are safe.

I think that if your child is scared, your school is doing a poor job of this. My younger kids were in 1st and 3rd grades last year. After Newtown, there were new protocols in place and they did practice what to do in an emergency but at no point was there any talk of "bad guys." Instead, they taught the kids that just like a fire drill helps them get out of the building safely, sometimes they need to practice how to stay safe in an emergency inside the building. They didn't specify what kind of "emergency" but I believe that when some kids asked, they alluded to things like weather.

When they put the new procedures into place, there was A TON of communication home to parents first about what would and would not be said to the children and what to say at home if the kids talked about it. The overriding message was "you are safe here at school."

Ask the teacher or principal what was said and what their communication plan surrounding the drills is. If there isn't one, bring it up. I this is just happening without parents being informed and given talking points, there are other kids out there who feel like your daughter and other parents who feel like you.

Yes it is a sad reality that we need this kind of thing, but there are ways to do it that relieve some of the anxiety that comes with this.

My dd started Kindergarten this year, and I was told she would be taught what to do in the event of something this awful happening at the school. It broke my heart too.

In our school system, we were told they aren't teaching the duck and cover approach anymore. They are teaching kids to move and run and get the hell out of the school. I guess the feeling behind it is that shooters are expecting people to be still and hiding, and it's harder to hit a moving target. Either way, it saddens and terrifies me.

Please talk to the guidance counselor and tell her that this has made your daughter afraid of school. Ask her to specifically work with your child to allay her fears. It could affect her learning and her behavior if they don't.

I guess you don't remember duck and cover drills.
We had them in elementary school (in the 70's) presumably in preparation for missile or nuclear bomb attacks.
It was a common civil defense practice since 1949 when Russia first tested their nuclear bomb through the end of the Cold War in the 1980's.
(Right, like crawling under your desk with your hands over your head is going to protect you from radiation.)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Duck_and_cover

Then there was the time someone called in a bomb threat and our whole school was sent outside into a field for 2 hours with no coats when there was a foot of snow on the ground - parents were upset about that - we were encouraged to run around a lot so we could try to stay warm.

Some kids are scared of fire drills.

Would you rather she not be afraid but have no idea what to try to do in an emergency?
Ignorance might be bliss but knowledge is power (and control is largely illusion).
Your daughter will take her cue from you.
If you don't act horrified or scared of it then eventually she won't be either.

Our district does the same thing. Really, I think most do. School shootings are actually very rare, compared to the amount of children in schools in the USA. Still, I would want my child to know what to do, if it happened at his school. But, I get what you're feeling. It is very sad.

I was in high school when Columbine happened, and we had drills the next week. Boy, did that change everything.

No, our school has not practiced this that I am aware of. My boys would have told me.

Our schools are locked during the day. You can't get IN the school unless you have business there....volunteering, picking up a sick kid, etc.

You need to call your schools principal and counselor and let them know that their practices are scaring your child. If she is having nightmares, then I would tell them that as well.

The pendulum has swung the other way and now it's going into the extreme protective mode. There needs to be a balance....as to what that balance is - I know not.

Our district has had lockdown drills for years. Elementary through HS. Yes, sad times we live in.

I'm with you, its so sad, and a sign of the times that we have these drills now (just as the bomb drills of the 50's were a "sign of the times"). One of the first things I thought of when Newtown tragedy happened was how sad it was that the teachers all followed procedure and knew what to do (those who had time anyway). I mean, its a good thing that we plan and know what to do, but also a very, very sad thing.

Yes my daughters school has lock down drill, and so does mine. But as far as I know they don't get in a closet. I have no idea how it is explained at elementary level, I never really thought of that. There are lots of reasons to go into lockdown beside an active shooter on campus, eg general police activity in the area. I work at a combined Jr. high/HS and we never have to explain to that age group what a lockdown drill is for. Also sad.

My gosh, even our daughters elementary school did these "bad guy drills" that has now been more than 15 years ago. To enter a school there is only 1 door visitors can enter through. The students are taught never to open a door to let anyone into the buildings. Only a teacher or administrator is allowed to allow others inside.

They had fire drills, tornado drills and these "lock down drills."

They talked about "Bad Guys" that might try to get into the school.

They told the parents about it first before they had one of these drills.

Yes, it made me very sad that this is what we have to teach our children.

But I had already taught our daughter to NEVER answer the doors to the outside without me or without my permission at our home.

That she needed a grown up to open our doors. To always keep our doors locked. To keep the car doors locked.. Not to leave our yard. To let me know when she was going to be outside so I could be with her in the front yard etc..

When we were growing up, we were just told to stay on our block.

Yes, as children we had drills at schools. Fire Weather and Bomb drills, we also lived in an area with an Air Force base.
We had Tornado drills.

This has always been a part of our lives. As parents and as teachers, we just have to remember that if we stay calm, our children will be calm. Act assured that they are going to be ok.

In reality, anything at any time could happen to any of us. Life is precious and unpredictable, but we just keep on plugging along.

If they do it is not noteworthy enough for my kids to share.

They were a reality when I went to school, they were a reality when my adult kids went to school and they were a reality when my younger kids went to school (now homeschooled). They have always existed.

My problem would be with the wording that is being used. Not the drills. The drills should be about safety, not a specific event. My friend lived in Moore, Ok, her DD attended Plaza Towers Elem, the very school where a number of kids lost their lives. Their drills were never for anything specific, they were strictly for an emergency situation. Period.

I would have a talk with the teacher. There is no reason a student should be walking away from these drills with fear. They should be walking away feeling proud about knowing what to do in the even there is an emergency.

Yes, my kids do. The restrictions on us getting into the school are also MUCH tighter after Sandy Hook last year. Ironically, I was in my kindergarten son's classroom with him working on a Christmas project that day. I cried and cried when I went home, but whatever the school has to do to protect my kids, I am all over it.

My kids are fully aware that there are bad people out there. They see the news, we talk to them, they know. They know what to do if something happens at home or at school. I LIKE that the school practices all sorts of drills (for bad guys, fires, tornado's, earthquakes, hurricaines, etc).

My kids school was on lockdown before because some bonehead bank manager decided to make it look like she and her son had been kidnapped from home and forced to rob the bank. I FREAKED out! I called the school and they were already on lockdown. No one in, no one out. I was so thankful.

It's good to talk to your child about bad guys and how to keep safe. I know 5 is really young, but age doesn't matter to crazies. Let her know they are only practicing, same as they do for fires....even though we all also hope that doesn't happen.

And explain to your child that this is only to keep her safe and teach her what to do if a bad situation ever comes up. She has nothing to worry about, but same as you practice fire drills at school or escaped plans at home, this needs to be practiced as well.

No. My country has very few, if any, random school shootings. The drills my children have are for fires. It was the same when I went to school.

I was thinking that maybe you should approach this with your daughter from an "in charge of safety" perspective. Tell her that this is not so much about the bad guy, as it is about being prepared. Tell her that the teacher and principal have a lot of kids to take care of, and just to imagine that if there was a problem, and everyone did their own thing and ran in a million different directions, how confusing that would be.

And maybe you can tell her that your own family needs a fire drill or fire preparedness plan (you know, the kind where they tell you that everyone needs to leave everything behind, one person - the parent or babysitter - will get the cat or dog, how to call 911 and make sure everyone knows the correct address, and everyone has a meeting place like at the big tree at the neighbor's house, etc). And put your daughter in charge of helping to plan the meeting place and make a family poster about the fire drill rules. #1. When the smoke alarm goes off, crawl as quickly as possible out the door. etc etc. Then conduct a drill and have your daughter critique it. Did everyone follow the rules? That might give her a sense of the importance of being prepared and take some of the fear out of it. It's not living in fear of the bad things, it's being prepared so that there is calm and organization. We do that in many little ways every day (looking behind us when we back the car up, checking to see that the oven is off after using it, etc). It leaves us with peace of mind. If you can instill that in your daughter, that might help.

I would feel horrible if my child came home so scared from a lockdown drill. :( I'm sorry for your daughter. Let the teacher know your daughter was frightened and you hope the language could be changed for future drills. They will probably have evacuation drills where students leave the building and go to a nearby safe building.
In the school where I work, and the district where my son attends, they do not talk about "bad guys". They have lock down drills "in case a wild animal gets into the school or something" The kids wonder about different animals that might get into a school and none have ever questioned how locking a door is needed to keep a bear or deer out of a classroom when they cant use the doorknob anyway!
I'm sure older kids know, but in Kinder and first they do not question it. We also stress, that fire drills occur when there is NO fire, and these drills are just for practice when there is no emergency.

I guess I agree - I am a 40s year old mom of a 2nd grader and we have done the tornado, fire and lock down drills over the last two weeks. My son isn't afraid of them - although last year when they practiced evacuating and he had to go into a neighboring cemetary he did ask a lot of questions about cemetaries:)

My son's elementary did all of these before Newtown happened. Personally, I am glad. If the kids know what to do in a drill then they can execute the plan in an emergency. If you think about it - the Newtown kids and teachers who survived had gotten word of the lockdown and did what they were supposed to do.

As a parent, I view it as my responsibility to make sure wherever my children are (preschool, Sunday school, public school, camp) has emergency plans in place and that they practice them. We can't schedule our emergencies.

When I was a kid, we did tornado, duck and cover for nuclear and fire drills. Not much has changed.

C.