I would like to get a my SIL a little gift who is going through IVF for the 2nd time now. First time failed. Her and my brother have been trying for years. I just had my 1st unexpectedly lastyear which I'm sure had to be a little upsetting although they didn't really show it. Any ideas of something I can get her?
How about a professional massage? I went through treatments for infertility and it's really stressful! Or maybe a gift certificate for a romantic restaurant for her and her husband, in the midst of trying so hard to get pregnant it's easy to forget to nurture your marriage (there's nothing less romantic that the clinical nature of IVF, but it's still important to keep the romance alive).
I've done two rounds of IVF as a surrogate. There are all sorts of superstitions surrounding IVF that surrogates swear by. Turtles are signs of fertility because they lay crazy amounts of eggs. Maybe get her a turtle charm. Also, a lot of women going through IVF wear green as a sign of new life and fertility.
Lastly, tell her to eat McDonald's french fries after the transfer or IUI. Surrogates swear by them. I ate them after both transfers and got pregnant both times...who knows, but sometimes those little rituals can make you feel better about things.
I think you're a great SIL for thinking of her and wanting to do something for her. I hope it works!
You know, I think the biggest thing is just to be there and ask her how she is feeling. My girlfriend went thru it and I called her one day just to see how she was feeling. She said I was the only one that had asked her about that. It gave her a chance to vent about how emotional the drugs were making her feel and how hard it was physically and emotionally.
I love the turtle idea but not the baby bracelet. What if (goodness forbid) it fails again? I wouldn't want that to look at.
When I went thruogh IVF, I loved the pair of socks that my friends got me. They had a lot of meaning and I wore them during the procedure. I would also be there for her and let her know if she needs someone to listen to.
It's really nice that you're thinking of her, but maybe you should just leave it alone. Of course, you know her, so you know if she would prefer the attention. My husband and I used medical intervention to get pregnant, and I didn't want to acknowledge it much except on my terms. I would discuss it with a certain group of friends if there were something to discuss, but I would not have wanted anybody to try to do something "special" for me because it didn't work the first time.
When I was trying to get pregnant, a girlfriend of mine gave me a beautiful bracelet (Brighton) that had all kinds of "baby charms" on it. I wore it often before and during my pregnancy. I have purchased one for several friends who are trying to start a family. Not a "magic charm", but just something that lets her know you are supportive and hoping that their wishes come true.
