Kids a Year Apart

I have a two year old and an 9 month old boys. I also work full time as well as my husband. On the weekends I do my major cleaning and laundry. It's hard when they want to help or they want you to play with them. What I do is I put in a movie then clean what I can. every now and then I let them help. My oldest son thinks throwing things away is the coolest thing ever and enjoys throwing things away for mommy. My youngest hates the vacum cleaner and stay's away from it when it's on so that takes care of that. You have to do things quick and dodge them in order to get things done but I make a game of it and don't let it consume all my time. I work all week long (I'm in the Marine Corps) and have the weekends off so I like to spend as much time with my kids as possible. Just relax and get in the groove of things. It's hard at first but when you find what works for you it will become easier.

I agree with everyone else. Don't stress. You have older kids, have them help. My 3 year old 2 year old are best friends, I call him her parrot because if she does something, he does it. That can make it easier, if I get her to clean, he will too, but usually it makes it harder because she's stubborn and strong willed. You have to let some things just roll off your back. My 3 year old loves helping me with the new baby 4 mo, which leaves me time to get a little cleaning done. Put in a video that your 18 mo old likes and just put the baby next to him/her. You should be good for at least 1 round of vaccuming, maybe even the dishes too!

Hire a housecleaner for the scrubbing and only make one goal a day to work toward.

I only have one little girl..21 months so I can only image how you have your hands full. I make one side of the bed and she falls. I make the other side and she calls for me. I've been trying to put makeup on all morning so I can go visit my husband at work. Baby steps. Too many goals or tasks in one day will make you feel like you are failing. Do the 10 minute timer cleaning? Everything goes into a empty diaper box. Make beds, dishes away, start a load..whatever. 10 minutes. Later when things are quiet maybe at nap time, you can sort that box of stuff to put away. If it sits there..it sits there but atleast it's not all over your house.

Hope this helps.

my kids are 16 months apart. They are 2 1/2(girl) and 14 months( boy ) . Once the little one gets a little bigger things get easier. ( not much some) Do your older children take any interest in the younger ones. I know when i'm with my sister her kids play with my kids and give me a brake for a little while they are 13 ( boy ) and 10 ( girl ). I've even found a moms group that does play dates and that helps get my older one away for a few minutes. But i usually have my daughter help me put toys away while my son naps or i "TRY" to get them to nap together so i have an hour to clean not every thing gets done in one day but it gets done.

My oldest just turned 3 and my younger one is 21 months- so almost two years old. Most of the time it's completely crazy around here and I don't have car at home so when my husband is at work durring the day I'm car-less unless I call my mom who lives about 15 minutes away to take us somewhere. I think the biggest thing I've had to realize is that the things that I once thought were important really aren't that important when you have kids. My house generally stays fairly clean, like my floors are always vacuumed and my counters are clean- not necessarily free of clutter but clean. So I do make sure that everything is liveable but toys here and there and everywhere just happens and you can't possibly ever keep up with it unless you are Super Mom because once you get it all picked up you turn around and there's another mess. You'll pull your hair out trying to deal with that :). One thing we have trouble with is getting laundry done but I just have to motivate myself to do it more frequently otherwise I have one night when husband is home that I have to do a LOT of laundry and that's not fun. Spend more time with your kids and less time worrying about your house being spotless. That's one of the biggest things I've learned. I also see that you have older kids so I'm sure they can help out with chores around the house (they may complain as all kids do but they should be helping clean the mess if they help make it). I do most of my shopping I need to do at night or call my mom and have her drive us around which makes it easier to take the two kids out at the same time. But I've just learned to enjoy life and play with my kids more and I'm a lot less grouchy and more patient and find that if I don't have high expectations about my house being clean and it does get really clean every once in a while I'm happy.

my two boys are 10 months two days apart. i think i know what you're going through! my oldest is very active, he's running around and like attention and my youngest, two months want all my attention also! i have talked to a few other parents in the same boat and they say it's like having twin but harder. i have learned though that as far as getting things done do the little things first while your 18 month old is following you around, i.e. get laundry together, straighten up even if your oldest come right behind you and destroys everything you've done at least you feel like you've done something cause i know if i dont get at least one load of laundry in the washer or at least together i feel like i havent done anything! and most of the time when my boyfriend gets home is when i run around while he watches the boys for at least a half an hour and get as much done as i can!!! i dont know what else to say but maybe we can come to each other and talk about having two under a year cause i know sometimes i feel like ripping my hair out! lol hope to talk to you soon K.

Hi D.!
My two angels are 10 1/2 months apart. Let me tell you it will get easier. or maybe Im just numb by now! :o) I had someone come into our home to help me for a few hours a day. They can help pick up do laundry or just tend to the kids so you can do it. Maybe a high school girl? a specific bed time is a must and I talk from experience! DO you have any other specific questions. Breck and Destiny are now 6 and 5.
N.

i have two lil girls that are 10 months apart (23 months and 13 months) and am also a stay at home mom. i normally get things done when my girls are napping. just try not to freak over all the toys everywhere because in my experience you pick up one thing off the floor and it will just be right back there in less than a min. i have my oldest help my straighten up by pretending its a game then the lil one joins in. and i understand you when it comes to the laundry it is never ending but i normally do it at night when my boyfriend is home since i live in an apt and its a walk to the laundry mat. good luck and i hope everything works out and get easier.

Hi D.,

I think you just have to do things when you get the chance. Like when the little ones are napping. That's when I did the majority of my house work when mine were little. Try not to stress too much about it. They care less about a perfectly kept house than they do about mommy time with them. I had a swing for my boys when they were very small. They loved it, and it gave me a way to entertain them for a while when I was doing house chores around them. I'm sure you're doing fine. It's great that you stay home with them. I applaud you for doing it!

D. A.

I feel your pain!!!I was in the same situation years ago.
My husband was in the military then, and was deployed for 6 months. Not only did I go back to work full time, the day after he was deployed. That is just for beginners. My children were 18 months apart, and I had a 15 year old who neded a ride to and from work. We were stationed on a military base, and to add salt to the wound, I was in charge of unpacking all of our household goods. On top of that, the water heater broke, they lost parts to the baby's crib, and I had to buy a new crib and put it together. The way I accomplished housework, laundry and all the other daily things were at night, usually after the kids were asleep or their nap time. Don't let all the work overwhelm you, take time with your kids, they grow so fast, and before you know it they are all grown up. It seems like there is no light at the end of the tunnel, but there is. So hang in there, and take one day at a time.

I have a 2 yr old and a set of 8 month old twins. It can be hard to get things done. But try investing in some preschool videos, activites, (baby einstein can be very interesting for small kids). And when you finally get enough things done around the house you just may get some spare time with the kiddies and some time for yourself. Oh and sticking to a daily routine (hard at first) free's up some time.

D.,

I dont have kids a year apart, but maybe i can help a bit... I have 3 at home the youngest is 3months. I have found that i had to make a list of things that need to be done around the house on a weekly basis. I posted it on the wall, then as i get them done I check them off. Also, Ive found, as tired as I am after the last feeding of the day (around 8pm) I stay up an extra 40 minutes and do what needs to be done. This makes me feel better in the morning, not having so much to do.

I hope this helps.

D.,

My two oldest kids (my sons) are 11 months and two weeks apart. I found it really hard to do most things but I started incorporating them into some of the projects and it really did free up some time. Don't expect any miracles here, you aren't going to have much time for a while but try taking them in the bathroom when you shower, making a little activity with toys in the kitchen while you clean/cook. Let the 18mo old help you vacuum (it will also help him master walking and start him early in realizing it has to be done) and then as corny as this sounds (I hated the concept but it works!) try writing down a list of the things you need to get done in a day then try ad figure out the easiest way to get it done and then check the stuff off. It will give you a better shot at getting it done and then you can relax (I use that term loosely).