Jewish Funeral Traditions

Updated on October 08, 2010
A.S. asks from New Albany, OH
11 answers

My very good friend just lost her grandmother yesterday. I remember from the passing of her grandfather several years ago, that flowers are not appropriate. She is not near by, so I can't bring food over. Does anyone know what is acceptable from long distance?

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

A fruit basket is always appropriate! There are companies that do kosher gift baskets of all kinds.
Or a remembrance stone for the unveiling ceremony (generally in 12 months).

2 moms found this helpful

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R.F.

answers from Dallas on

While food is very traditional (you can find a local deli to deliver), another option is to have a tree planted in the grandmother's memory:
http://www.jnf.org/
Thank your for taking our traditions into consideration - that is so thoughtful!

2 moms found this helpful
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C.D.

answers from Atlanta on

I second the Edible Arrangements!! My family and I have received several for different occasions and they are wonderful. I have sent several and all the feedback I get is great. It is a nice treat in sometimes stressful situtation. I don't know abou the Kosher issue but I would assume that they might have information on there website.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.G.

answers from Macon on

A card, a food basket from an online source (kosher, of course) and I love the idea of the Edible Arrangements. Just make sure they know Kosher is important. Plant a tree, make a donation (to Cancer if she had cancer, or to whatever) charity.
It is nice that you are trying to do something appropriate and not go against with their religion. That alone makes a difference to your friend, I'm sure!

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Look online to see if they have posted an obituary yet. Since it is not appropriate, maybe they will list a "In lieu of flowers the family has requested donations be made to xxxx".

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Las Vegas on

I just had the unfortunate occasion of needing to send a food basket to a friend of my husband's family who lives across the country. The daughter of the deceased is diabetic, so I sent a salmon basket from MacKenzie.com. But, here is what I found in some of my research for a condolence basket. Most of the options tend to be sweets, dried fruit and fresh fruit:

http://www.kosherline.com/shiva.asp

http://www.zabars.com/gift-sympathy-condolence/Gift_Sympa...

http://www.challahconnection.com/Kosher-Sympathy-Shiva-Gi...

http://www.koshergiftbox.com/Kosher-Sympathy-Shiva/produc...

1 mom found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from Chicago on

It would be appropriate to make a donation to a charity in honor of your friend's grandmother. Some families will list the charity preference in the obituary, if not, just pick one that you feel the family will appreciate. The donatoion will send the family a card to let them know that a donation has been made in honor of their grandmother.

It is tradition to bring food to the family when you go to their home to pay a condolence call. Since you live far away, it does not sound like you will be visiting.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.L.

answers from Hartford on

You can send a condolence card or a fruit basket through a local florist.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Edible Arrangements is AWESOME! They do really pretty, fresh and tasty fruit arrangements that are made to look like floral bouquets. A friend sent me one when my mother passed away, and it was such a nice change and bright, fresh surprise. It really did cheer me up.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.F.

answers from Columbus on

Since you cannot make food, Find out if the family has chosen a charity and make a donation.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

Well, you learn something new everyday. I am Jewish (but not religious) and I had no idea that flowers are not appropriate! Interesting. Sorry I can't be of any help, just wanted to let you know that you helped me!

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