Iud/tubal

Hello C.,
I had a tubal a long time ago and when my first husband died, remarried only to have it reversed. It was a long hard recovery.
I would suggest that he get his snipped. He is the one who does not want any more and it is much easier for him to have it. My three sons all had it done so their wives would not have to go through it. Think it over real good before you make this decision. I was lucky and my reversal did work and we have only one more beautiful child. L.

Have you looked into an implanon??..Its good for 3 yrs.. I have one. I got it put in 15 months ago after I had my son. It isnt the greatest but It does the job as birth control.

Hi. I was in a similar situation when deciding to go with the mirena iud. For me, I felt that you never know what can happen and it's my body to make such a huge choice. I had a hard time making the choice because the thought of a little piece of iron in my uterus kind of freaked me out. I talked with my physician who also has one and she helped ease my mind. So, I went with the iud and i'm glad I did. The procedure was a bit painful but really quick. It felt like a small labor pain, but like I said it was over before you know it...unlike my 33 hour labor. So, I could deal with the one little labor like pain for less than a minute. Good luck.

okay, here gos. I have a iud because I have had lots of problems with the pill and dapo shot. and my husbend is dragging his feet to get a vasectamy. so last year i got my iud(murena) and i love it. its good for 5 years and i dont get a period at all. I just thought I might warn you, it is prutty painful when the insert it. I was about ready to say " forget it " half way through the procedure. and im not a baby about that kind of stuff, I had both of my kids drug free, no iv or anything. If you get it take advil befoe you go in. Another thing make sure your incherence will cover it. good luck on this and on your next baby. K.

I would definitely go for the IUD. I use Paragard. I had some cramping and spotting between periods for the first 4 months. (Nothing major...Tylenol would ease the cramping.) After that it's fine. I've been using it for 2 years now and I have regular cycles.
I have friends who use Mirena and are happy with it. I just didn't want the hormones, so I chose Paragard.
I wouldn't go for a tubal....it's permanent and it sounds like your not sure of your relationship. Best of luck to you.

I have never had either, but I did talk to my midwife about it and she said that she has delivered more tubal babies than IUD babies. She said that the IUD is a more reliable way to go. I agree, especially if you are not 100% sure that you are done.

C.,
Based on your concerns around your marriage, I'm not seeing that having a tubal would best support you down the road if your concerns become reality. Additionally, even though that concern may not happen, once you have the tubal, that fear will be with you every day, consciously or unconsciously.

I have the Mirena IUC and love it. It take some willingness to wait out the first 6 months of spotting while your body adjusts. For me, I get my period (2 days) and then spot for 10-12 days. With most women having little to no period after 6 months, it was an easy choice for us. And my husband loves it. Our sons are 18 and 21, and we have no desire to have more children, this was such an easy option versus either of us have any surgical procedure. The insertion was quick and pretty easy, just a little pinch and a little pressure and cramping for a couple of days - nothing major. The insertion was done in less than 90 seconds. I've heard some people say it was very painful. I'd suggest that pain perceptions/tolerances vary from person to person. What I can best tell you is it is as easy as getting an IV that you would need for a hospital procedure and doesn't involve a hospital stay. So, even if you feel your pain tolerance isn't the best, it is still a better option.

A vasectomy wasn't an option for us as we've done lots of research on the impact on mens health in their later years and there are some connections between vasectomies and other conditions.

Best wishes!
G.

I had a tubal done after my second son, knowing we were going to have a planned c-section-so why not.....I hadn't even thought of it, but the doctor suggested it......I did a lot of research on the internet, and am still not sure about the decision that we made 2 1/2 years ago......my husband was willing to have a vasectomy, but I thought, since I was already going to be under the knife, it should be me. While financially, I can't see having more kids, I wish in my heart that I could still get pregnant and wonder too what would happen if my hubby were to die/or if we were to divorce (God forbid; I would be devastated), but I would still want to have children....the chances according to a lot of medical research vary, but it's around 70% at your age and continues to decline with age. Also, it's not a pleasant surgery for a woman who isn't already going through a c-section......my doctor specifically said that if I wasn't having a c-section that he would suggest my hubby doing it.

It seems to me that you understand very well the seriousness of this decision. A tubal is quite drastic if you are not absolutely certain. You are still young and you just never know where life is going to take you. I had a Paraguard IUD for years before my first pregnancy and was very happy with it. It is good for 10 years and uses no hormones. It is a simple office procedure to have it inserted. It hurt a little going in, but then I completely forgot about it. I had no side effects. When I wanted to get pregnant, the doctor easily removed it with no pain whatsoever and I became pregnant within a few weeks. The difference between Paraguard and Mirena is that Mirena is only good for 5 years, whereas Paraguard can stay in for 10 years. Mirena uses a low dose of hormone and Paraguard uses copper. The cost of either is about the same and generally will pay for itself (as compared to the pill) in about a year. You can always get an IUD with the intent to discuss your options again in a year or 2. Good luck!

Hi C.:

I have not had either procedure, but can tell you that I have 2 wonderful boys (8 and 2) and I have been an insulin dependent diabetic for over 20 years. My baby days are over b/c of this and I want you to be really sure before you do anything permanent. I get very sad sometimes when I think that I will never feel a baby moving in my belly or smell the smell of my own newborn baby. Please do not do anything permanent, you are so young and I do not want you to regret any decision you make now.

Take care.

Hello! Our situations are reversed, I am the one who doesn't want any more children while my husband thinks he does. When I was pregnant with my youngest,now 2, I had everything set up for the tubal and when the Dr was going over the details thats when my husband changed his mind. I was not happy about it but agreed to discuss it and we came up with a compromise. I had the Mirena IUD implanted about 8 weeks after my daughter was born. There wasn't any pain and was kind of like having your PAP. I haven't had any problems with it. It lasts for 5 years which I thought is a good amount of time to come to a mutual decision about more children or not. You can have it removed anytime so if you decide before 5 yrs it is just removed. The tubal is permanent, so if you are even thinking about having more you should probably go with the IUD. There are a couple of different types so talk to your Dr to determine which would be best for you. Feel free to contact me and we can chat about it if you have more questions. Good luck with your decision.

E. L

Don't get the tubal until you are sure. I had a tubal after my 2nd and am having alot of woman problems now. You are too young to have it done. I think you should do the IUD. Both my nieces have them and they say they hardly know it's there.

I cannot believe that I am going to say this, with four kids, but there are times that I wish I did not go with the tubal. I have regrets. I think a greater percentage of women do...food for thought among your many posts.

Best wishes to you,

T.

Hi C.;
you are a young woman... there are MANY forms of birthcontrol that would not require you to take meds every day. If you are not sure DO NOT get your tubes tied.. I say you should schedule an appointment with your ob/gyn to just discuss birth control and your options. There is one they can put in your arm that is good for 5 yrs. You can have it taken out if you change your mind and you can have it replace in 5 yrs if you wish to continue with it. Just make sure you get all the side affects and pros and cons of each one before you make your choice... but don't get your tubes tied until YOU are sure.

Good Luck n God Bless You
S.

Hi C.,

I just had a tubal earlier this month, and it almost always involves going under general anethstesia. My OB doesn't usually like to do tubals on women my age (34) but since I already have 4 children, she conceded. The only reason I had it done instead of my husband was b/c I was having abdominal surgery anyhow to reconstruct my muscle wall after having twins. You are very young and I understand your sadness over the idea of being permanently altered. If I were you, I would ask my husband to have the vasectomy if he doesn't want anymore children for 2 reasons: Its MUCH less risky to do his surgery, and if hes' the one who feels so strongly about it, he should be the one to do it. I think its important to listen to your instincts... Just my 2 cents.... GL!

Dear Tubal Shmoobel,
Ask your OBGYN about the Tubal surgery. Ask for literature on the procedure. Google it. And if none of the above scare you to death with the side effects and complications then go for it girlfriend!
I was going to have the procedure done after my fourth child. But after reading about all the potential oops's for this surgery vs. a man sitting in a chair for a vasectomy, for 1/2 hour, wide awake, and then sitting on a frozen bag of peas for a few days and the surgeon going no where near a vital organ - guess what one we opted for?!
Good luck! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

It's absolutely easier on the man to have a vasectomy than for you to have full surgery. If he thinks you should be the one to go through that, then he's being selfish or is just uneducated on the differences between the two. You have the right to say NO, I'm not going to have surgery and I do not want that procedure done. Either he gets the procedure or you'll go on the pill or something. If he wants to make more sure that you won't get pregnant then he can wear a condom. It's only fair for him to take part in the protection process as well, if he's so determined not to have more children.

K.
mom to 5 including triplets

I have the Mirena IUD and I absolutely love it. You can have it in up to 5 years and never have to worry about birth control. I would definiately do a mirena or some other IUD if you aren't quite ready to have a tubal. Especially if you don't know if you will be with your husband forever.
It hurts a little-I'm not going to lie-but only when they first put it in and then you bleed for a half hour or so. I haven't had ANY problems since and my periods now are about 1 day and I would never even know that I was having a period-I only notice when I wipe. I don't need to use tampons or pads, no cramping or anything. I am telling you it is GREAT!
If you have any other questions-please feel free to email me. ____@____.com

Here are the things I know about both. A tubal ligation is permanent, but there are some possible "complications." It is actually not 100% effective like a vasectomy is (many women don't know this) and over time, the tubal can become less effective (this is not true for all women, but if you read the info, you will see that 10-15 years down the road your chances of getting pregnant again are fairly high). With you being as young as you are, there is a good possibility that you could be one of those women that gets the suprise baby much later in life. If you are going to go with an IUD, I would suggest the Mirena. I have had one in for over a year now and LOVE it. Lighter periods, little cramping, stays in for 5 years (but can be removed at any time), and is 99.9% effective (even more than the tubal!). Plus, if things didn't work out between you and your husband, you could have more kids. They are a little bit pricey, but when you compare the Mirena in for 5 years versus the pill, it is actually cheaper. Hope this helps! :)

If he doesn't want anymore children and you do have him while your still pregnant have another vasectomy. You never know what the future will hold. And if you are already thinking this won't last forever.Have him fixed. Tubal's are harder to reverse and If you have any women health problems(uterus tilted,etopic pregancy) an IUD is not for you.

I don't know much about getting your tubes tied. But and IUD has its own set of issues. They are safer than they used to be. But it also depends on if your body can handle extra hormones in the IUD and when you think life begins. If you think life begins at conception then this isn't for you. An IUD won't let a fertilized egg implant which in essence is a chemical abortion.

Hi C.,

Go for the IUD. I had a tubal done when my son was born 12 years ago. And, there's not a day goes by that I regret it.
One year after my son was born, my husbands only brother was killed in a car accident. Leaving my husband the only one to carry on the family name. We only had one child together. My inlaws are bitter to me and let it be known that they will only ever have one grandchild. I regretted having the tubal done. I still do. Not because of them but, because I love my husband and he was ok with my having it done but every once in a while he asks me if I'd ever have the tubal reversed. It's expensive. We looked into it. Atleast with the IUD you can have it removed it you and your husband ever change your minds about having more kids.

Good Luck to you
Renee
Port Royal

Hi, C.!
I'm a total statistics person! I, personally, would go w/ the IUD. They USED to be very scary devices but in recent years have gotten leaps & bounds better, more comfortable & a gazillion times safer & more effective. You can get ones that are hormone-free (which is, in my opinion, the safest option) such as Para-Gard. It's almost as effective as a ligation but is FAR safer (the surgery, although very rare in occurance, does carry significant risks) and it is also, of course, reversible.

Good luck with your decision and with your upcoming birth!!!!!

If you are not 100% sure, don't get a tubal!

Get an IUD. They are almost as effective but they are REVERSIBLE! I have Mirena and love it. $400 for 5 years of no worries--and if I want #2 prior to that, I just need the ob to pull it out! It didn't hurt at all to put in--at least nothing compared to birth, rofl. It's just a little cramping at first, but no complaints!

HI C.,
I was in the same place as you after the birth of my youngest child. I chose to use Mirena which is an IUD. It is easily inserted in a doctor visit and can stay in place up to five years or can easily be removed with a quick return to fertility. The only drawbacks are possible irregular bleeding for the first few months after placement but if all works out you never have to worry about birth control and it should help with periods making them lighter and shorter and you can easily choose to still have more children.

B.

Hello C.:
I got pregnant with the IUD. You have to be on your period if not the doctor will have to snip your cervices in order to insert the device (this is what happened to me.) With the tubal you will see a change with you period how much will depend on the individual (I did not have any problems.) I did not have to use the pain medication (standard procedure.) C., your doctor may not perform a tubal because of your age, please think about your birth control methods. My children are 20 months apart (I was 26 when I had my second child.) When I got divorce, it became extremely difficult being the head of household and taking care of two small children. You said that you are/have experienced some problems with your husband think about the possibility of being a single parent and not only the effects it will have on you but especially the children. I wish you the best.

If you are not ready, I would either go with the IUD or some other type of longterm birth control. You may want to check your insurance as well. I am sure your husband does not relish the idea of having another vasectomy but I know with our insurance, the copay for a vasectomy is 1/2 the cost of the copay for a tubal. Also, the vasectomy is a whole lot less invasive and healing time is less.

If you is uninterested in the vasectomy, though, I think I would opt for nonpermanent birth control. However, look into the side effects and dangers before choosing to figure out which is best for you. My friend went with an IUD (the Mirena one I believe). She was warned about side effects and complications. One of the rarer complications was that it could break through the side of the uterine wall. It punctured the side like it was supposed to but then ripped through. She ended up having to have surgery to have it removed. It had ended up traveling into the lining of her intestines.

I don't mean to scare you but want to be sure you make yourself aware of the side effects and complications before you make your final decision.

Personally, I was ready to be done after my third and had the tubal. They did my tubal while I had my c-section. I would go that way again if I needed to. However, I knew I was ready to be done. If I wasn't sure I was ready, I would not have opted for the permanent birth control.

Good luck with your decision and with your marriage. I hope that things work out for you in the manner you want them to.

Hi C.. No doctor will perform a tubal on you unless you are absolutly sure that is what you want...and obviously you aren't. There are tons of different forms of birth control, so talk to your doctor about it. Tell your doctor about your concerns and fears, as well as your feelings. He will be able to answer any and all questions and suggest the best method for you. Good luck.

C.,

My sister had an IUD for 10 years and the only thing she noticed was heavier periods. Other than that she was fine. She had it taken out last year and now she is pregnant with twins. I did see a commercial for one that lasts for 5 yrs rather than 10 yrs. I would definitely go with the IUD rather than a tubal because it is less expensive and not so permanent. Just my 2 cents...

Hi C.,

Congrats on your pregnancy. My recommendation would be to avoid the tubal if you think might want to have kids again in the future. It is major surgery and reversals are not easy - nor are they always possible. My sister had one after her 3rd child thinking she would never have any more kids - but now 7 years later she is going through a divorce and thinking about having kids again with her new beau. You are young. I would say have your hubby get another visectomy (it is an office procedure - very minor - and is easily reversible as you know). Or use birth control. I have never used an IUD, so I can't help you there.

J.

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DEFINITELY the IUD if you are the least bit iffy! It is very hard to do a tubal reversal...much easier to remove the IUD. They are good for 5 years and by then you may know your plans, if not then have another IUD placed. Also, the tubal is only easier at the time of delivery if you have a c-section. If you deliver vaginally, then it is the same process as if you were doing it at any other time.

I recently had a tubal ligation (Tuesday) and for me it was the best decision. The only thing I can tell you is to be sure whether you want a procedure like this done. It is for the most part permanent, there is not a high success rate when it comes to reversals and it is very costly, like 15-20K. (this I was told by my doctor) my husband and I both decided jointly that it was the best thing. I have two children and do not want any more. No matter what happens between me and my husband we are both very happy with two kids. If you are already getting said about having one I wouldn't even consider it at this point, especially as it seems that you and your husband are having problems (your words) and you are feeling unsure whether this relationship will last. Do not let him push you into one. If he had a reversal then let him get another vasectomy if he doesn't want to have to worry about it. This is something you need to think long and hard about. If your husband is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with then you really have to think about pushing the kids issue. Is it really worth giving up a marriage for the sake of having more kids? Is your need for more than two children that great that you are willing to do it alone or with someone else if need be? These are questions I think you need to ask yourself. As far as an IUD it is not a permant thing and it can be removed and you can still have children if you want to. An IUD would be inserted at the doctor's office at a visit as far as I know. Have you thought about Mirena? I know it was suggested to me but I became pregnant with our second child on birth control. We wanted him but he just came two years sooner than we planned. Hope that this helps you. Good luck.

I had an IUD placed after our second child was born, 3 years ago. It has been so great! The reason we decided on it was because we were 99% sure we didn't want any more kiddos, but wanted to keep the option open incase 5 years down the road we changed our minds. The procedure wasn't painful. There was just a small amount of cramping afterward. I love the IUD. We don't have to worry about getting pregnant again.
Good luck

I had Mirena inserted about 4 months ago. It wasn't to painful of a process, it took about 2 minutes and I would say it "pinched". I bled for the first 4 weeks straight, but after that my periods returned to regular and this past week it was so light and lasted only 2 days. It is wonderful. The best part is, should you decide to breastfeed the new baby it has not affected my production levels like the BCP did with my first baby. I understand completely how you feel. I have a daughter and a son and my husband and I think we are done but I don't want that option taken away perminently. Also-Mirena (if not covered by your ins like me) has very reasonable pricing with payment plan options. Good Luck!!

Hi C.,

Conrats on the pregnancy!!!

I have had a tubal and regret it every month. I get SEVERE pain during ovulation time. I am lucky compared to some women that has had side affects from it. There is a whole list of worse things. Some women do great with it though, but you never know going into it whether you will be one of those women or not. I wish somebody had informed me of the possible side affects before I decided on it.

Also, tubal is possibly permanent. Some can possibly be reversed but there is no guarantee. If a few years from now you decide to have another baby, it would be a harder process to do it IF you even can.

If you already feel like you may regret it, I would advice doing something less permanent.

I hope this helped.

L.

C.,
Just so you know where I'm coming from I was a practicing Nurse Midwife for 10 yrs and am now a SAHM with a 3 yr old little girl. I don't have personal experience with either method but counseled patients about birth control and inserted IUDs throughout my practice. If you were my patient I would say that you probably should not get a tubal. You must assume that it is permanent and you won't be able to reverse it. If there is any possibility that you might want anther for whatever reason I wouldn't do it. Given that you are only 29yo you may have 10-15 yrs to regret your decision. IUDs are very easy to insert. You get it done on a normal office visit ( It's like an extra long pap smear) and assuming the it is correctly inserted, neither you, nor your husband should feel anything other. There is usually a little bit of cramping on insertion and sometimes minimal bleeding/spotting but otherwise there should be nothing. Removal is very easy. Takes about 5 minutes and again other than some cramping, most patients don't complain of any pain. As to safeness, IUDs are very safe. The ones that caused all the problems are now off the market. Depending on which one you get they stay in for up to 10 yrs. You should talk to you MD or CNM/NP about their protocols. IUDs are generally very effective. Having said that, I have had at least 1 patient with every form of birth control fail and get pregnant while using it, including tubals. You can also try the IUD for awhile then get a tubal when it's right for you. Getting a tubal ligation done is also more involved than having a vasectomy, so my bias is always that he gets the vasectomy rather than you getting the tubal. Especially since being pregnant is hard enough on one's system. But as I said that's my bias. Again if you were my patient, my biggest concern would be that you don't be pressured into doing anything permanent that you may later regret.
Hope this helps.

I had a sterilization procedure done called Essure. It is permanent, and it is safer than a tubal. My doctor recommended it. I however, was sure that I was done having children (I have 3--14, 10 1/2 & 4) and if you are sure you are done having kids, this is the way to go. You, however, seem unsure, and at 29, you are still young. It is natural to feel sad when your childbearing years are over. I am 41, and although I would not want to be pregnant again, I still feel a twinge of sadness when I see younger women such as yourself going through such a wonderful and fulfilling time in life. I think that is a positive thing, though, because it really says how much you have enjoyed the mothering experience. Whatever you decide, I would NOT have either procedure done immediately after the birth of your second child--let your body heal, let your mind heal as well. My doctor doesn't even perform a tubal right after birth anyway. They make patients wait at least 6 weeks. I hope this was helpful somewhat. Good luck to you and with the birth of your beautiful new baby!

Some doctors won't do a tubal on someone so young. Besides, it can be a miserable procedure - at least it was for me - I had deleiverd my baby wth ease the day before and then the tubal was the next morning and YUK!

So let HIM do you both a favor - he doesn't want any more kids, so let him get a vasectomy. It's was easier on the man, and frankly it sounds like you know that there is a chance that you may want to have more kids without him.

An IUD can have huge problems - I bled for a month. also yuk.

I suggest that you tell hubbbers that while you understand his desire to stop reproducing, you have no intention of doing anything permanent at this point. Give him a large box of condoms tied with a big red bow.

C.,
Go for the IUD.

Based on what you've said, you are not ready to have a tubal. Of course no one wants to admit their marriage may not work, but I commend you on being honest enough to admit there could be a chance. If you met someone else you may want to have another child.

The IUD is just as effective as a tubal. I had a Mirena inserted in December 2007. I have to be honest, it did hurt getting it put in...but not terrible and only for a minute. Felt a little crampy and then one point hurt, but like I said not terrible. I've had no cramps or pain since having it put in. I had spotting for the first month or so, and only one period since then.

If you have any questions, feel free to email me.

Missy

So Ill be the bearing of Bad IUD news.
I had Mirena for about 4 1/2 years.I had it removed in June of 07. At first the light spotting was fine, then my period went away altogether. And that was great! My mood swings were insane! And Id like to blame my weight gain on it too, but I think it was just part of the problem. My husband said he could feel the removal strings and it hurt him. Then certain time during sex I would get these awful cramps, and I would be on the floor curled up in a ball for hours. Worse than labor pains. This continued and I finally had it taken out. My period return with a vengeance, I was bleeding clots the size of silver dollars. It was awful for 3 months. Then we tried to get pregnat...its been nine months. Its been a roller-coaster of a ride. If I were you I keep looking. Your not ready for Tubal & I had a love hate relation ship with the IUD. Its up to you. But thats the my side effects!