We are THREE DAYS into summer vacation and I've hit a slight dilema with my school age kids. My daughters, ages 6 and 5 (next month) whine constantly that they're hungry. They're not hungry, they're BORED. When they are in school, the school provides them with breakfast at 9am and lunch at 12:30, with a snack later in the afternoon. I'd love to stick with the schedule, but at 7am (after we've all been up for an hour) they are already wanting breakfast. There are a number of reasons I'd like to stick to their school/meal schedule, one of which, I truly value my mornings to get as much work done as possible (not housework, work-work, I work from home). Is it wrong to make them wait until 9am? I would never refuse my children food if they were truly hungry, but I really don't think this is the case. They are not mature enough to help themselves. Thanks ladies!
AHHHHH you all made me feel so bad, BUT in a good way bc now I see the light, LOL! We're doing breakfast at 8am now, but I'm sticking by lunchtime @ 12/12:30. And yes, they're bored, and when they're bored they ask for a snack, each and every time. It has nothing to do with hunger ;) Now that breakfast is at an earlier time, they're still finding things to whine about first thing in the morning! Time to start teaching the kiddos new chores, time to get library cards, time to keep these ladies busy and have a whine-free summer!! Thanks ladies!
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M.C.
answers from
Detroit
on
No, I don't think it's wrong for them to wait until 9:00 a.m. Keeping them on a schedule helps until they are old enough to take care of their needs. My kids do the same thing when they are home from school. You are right, it's boredom. I usually have my kids eat a banana or offer a small bottle of water. That works very well for my kids until breakfast time.
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L.L.
answers from
Los Angeles
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What is the big deal of giving them breakfast earlier?? If they say they're hungry, feed them. Doesn't have to be a big production. I doubt they're "bored" at 7 a.m.
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S.K.
answers from
Kansas City
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I don't think waiting until 9 is wrong. It's just hard for them. I too have a lot of chores in the morning. Mine is housework. My daycare children start to filter in around 6am. I have them lay back down. We eat breakfast whenever I feel the house is clean enough and that everyone is here for awhile. It could be as early as 7:30 or as late as 9am. Yesterday one of the boys asked for breakfast sooner. I did stop and feed everyone a few minutes later because I don't like to think about kids being hungry.
How about this for a compromise? Make up a snack try in the fridge with sliced apples, sliced carrots, some raisins, a little dry cereal, some diced water melon and put it all in easy containers they can choose from. Tell them that anything on that tray is okay for them to get for themselves. Put a box of wet ones on the table and some paper plates and teach them to wash their hands before and after they eat. Have them clean up their mess when they are done. This way they have plenty of healthy snacks available when you are busy working. You could even put some milk in some tall sippy cups in advance. My 9 year old still likes to drink from sippy cups. Maybe she's weired :)
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S.B.
answers from
Dallas
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I think if I got up and didn't get to eat for 3 hours, (from the 6 am wake up time to the 9 am you want to feed them time) I would be starving! And I think your little ones need to eat and also probably want your attention. Unless you change bed time so the kids don't wake up until 8:30, then what you want to do is unreasonable. If you think they are constantly bored, then hire a student to come to your house for a few hours a day to supervise and play with the girls. They could also help your girls get some breakfast. Then you could get some work time in. But make sure you schedule some time with your girls this summer. They will grow up quickly.
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B.W.
answers from
Dallas
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If they have already been up for an hour at 7am, they are hungry....perhaps you could try having fruit or premade muffins for them to eat at that time and then the big meal at 9? or they could sleep until 8 giving them needed rest and you the time to work? Kids are pretty much hungry and need to eat when they get up....hope this is of some help
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K.B.
answers from
Milwaukee
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They are hungry... eating breakfast 3 hours after waking up is hard to do, they are only kids and it has been over 12 hours since they last ate. My daughter is only 4 years old and since she was 3 years old she could get her own cereal in the morning and juice (not because I made her but because she wanted to, maybe teach them how to do it). I would leave bags or bowls of cereal in the fridge and glasses of milk/juice that they can have. Let them know that it is there and to sit at the table and eat it. OR at least let them snack on a banana or granola bar. My daughter eats 5 times a day 7:30am, 10am, 12:30pm, 2pm, 6pm then a handful of goldfish 10 mins or so before bed time. Kids eat a lot and need that energy to play & grow.
Honestly if you are the only one there in the morning and the kids are up & need something work comes second. I know it is nice to have a quiet morning, I try to get a lot of work e-mails done in the morning myself, but I have found that giving her breakfast and going back to the computer to work is much easier then her asking for food every 5 mins, I usually get at least another hour of quiet work time if I feed her. Also give your children ideas of things to do to keep busy, they are still at the age of needing guidance. Could say crayons & coloring books are on the table, play with the doll house or whatever they like to do.
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J.G.
answers from
Orlando
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I'm pretty sure you're supposed to eat within an hour of getting up. I imagine if they had breakfast early, they would still eat a snack at 9:00 and then lunch at their regular time. My kids are a little bit younger than yours (4, 3, 2, 6 months), but they usually eat breakfast at 7:30/8:00, snack at 10:00, and lunch at 12:00. (They also have pm snack at 3:00, and dinner at 5:00.)
During the school year, I think it would be much better for them to have something to eat in the morning before school, even if it's something really quick. My kids just have cereal for breakfast, sometimes with orange juice or fruit. You could even give them dry cereal in a bag so that they have something in their tummies.
They're old enough that they could even get these things themselves if that's your "work time." It would probably make them feel "grown-up" if they were responsible for making their own breakfast--they will most likely enjoy doing it!!! Good luck to you!
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S.S.
answers from
Los Angeles
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breakfast is the most important meal of the day which means you should eat no later than 1 hr from waking (preferably w/in 30 min of waking). they're not bored unless they're whining for food all day! they just want breakfast! feed them early so their bodies can feel satiated and you can get some work done!
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S.C.
answers from
Norfolk
on
Our bodies are designed to need fuel every 3-4 hours. At 7am they have not had any fuel for 12hrs if they ate dinner at 7pm the night before. A long time for a little body. When they are in school they are probably so busy in the morning getting to school (and you doing your thing) that they are probably ravenous by 9am. Research has shown that our bodies do better and our metabolism is faster with small snacks/meals every 3-4 hours AND when you eat something (doesn't have to be an IHOP sized breakfast) within 30 minutes of waking up. They can help themselves to things like fruit (have it precut and set out for them), cereal bars, cheese sticks, yogurt, hard boiled eggs. My 6 year old knows how to use the toaster, gets his own cereal, bowl, spoon and can pour milk & juice. I have a low cabinet where I have put unbreakable dishes and cups so my kids can help themselves. I also put things low enough in the fridge for them to reach. Sometimes i'll make fruit and yogurt parfaits the night before for them and set them in the fridge to get when they are hungry in the morning. Sure you'll get an occassional mess, especially in the beginning, but this is how they learn responsibility and life skills.
The whining is also a sign that they want your attention. You may have to adjust your work schedule while they are home for the summer now that they are older. My kids (9 + 6) want my attention first thing in the morning. After a little attention they are good and will go play on their own, that's when I get my work done. We do breakfast first so I know that they are good in the food department for a few hours. They just need to know that they are more important than my work, errands, cleaning, etc. Good luck!
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K.F.
answers from
New York
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Do what I used to do. I would set up a bowls of dry cereal, fruit and/or veggies for them and put two small cups of milk in the fridge where they can reach for them to pour on their cereal if you want them to have a bowl of wet cereal. This would give you the time you need and help them to feel a little more independent.
I like putting out the fruit better because it can be filling and healthy or perhaps graham crackers and peanut butter.
Just keep simple things for them to eat before you serve up breakfast.
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M.D.
answers from
Dallas
on
I think you are getting a lot of ideas from other mothers. I personally need to eat when I get up. I have one child who does take over an hour to be hungry, but not 3 hours to wait for breakfast in the morning, and another one that is ready to eat as soon as he wakes up. Personally, if you are getting up at 6 am, by 7 they should be hungry, not bored. I don't know what time your kids go to bed, assuming by 9 PM; and dinner was probably around 6 PM, maybe a snack before bed, but still, over 10 hours without eating, kids that age are hungry and you want to wait until 9 in the morning, to me that seems a little too long for a kid. Have a bowl of fruit out, dry cereal, breakfast bars, etc. So to answer your question, yes, that is too long for a kid that age to wait to eat, especially since they are dependent on you. You say you work from home, it would take you 5 minutes to make them each a bowl of cereal. You could satisfy them and get right back to work and get more done I would think, instead of hearing your little ones cry they are hungry, I believe they are hungry not bored. Just my opinion...
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K.B.
answers from
Houston
on
When my littlest one was still waking up during the night and I needed my older 2 to let me sleep in a little bit in the morning when they would wake up early, I would leave a granola bar and a drink or a bag of dry cereal and a drink in the refrigerator where they could reach it in the morning. This way they would get up,get their snack and they would be able to eat and play for a little while without needing me immediately. I would suggest doing the same for your girls so that you can work. Yes, if they are used to waiting until 9:00 to eat they should be able to continue that during the summer, but I also don't see anything wrong with having a little something earlier so that it tides them over.
Will they continue to get breakfast at school next year? I'm not used to kids eating breakfast at school so my kids have to eat at least by 7:30 in order to get to school on time at 8:00.
Good luck,
K.
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M.W.
answers from
St. Cloud
on
Breakfast when they wake up (or even around 7am) is NORMAL! I would not make them wait...... Just make a new schedule and stick to it. Breakfast at 7, mid-morning snack (can be as little as a muffin or cracker) at 9:30, lunch at noon, and supper at 5. It's good to get the body going with a good breakfast when they get up! They say it's the most important meal of the day.
As for the summer boredom...... Head to the library once a week and pick up some books for them to look at. Tape books are great because they are old enough to do those by themselves! Have some items at their disposal so they don't have to bother you. Paper, markers, and stickers to make stuff. Playdoh and toys. Etc.
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L.B.
answers from
New York
on
Why don't you give them something easy like a banana to hold them over until you are ready to make their full breakfast. It's a win, win situation. They get something and you get to work without interruption from whining.
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D.B.
answers from
Norfolk
on
Yes it is wrong. They might not get breakfast at school until 9:00 but they are undoubtedly starving - they just know no one there really cares so they do not waste their time complaining. Apparently they are making the mistake of assuming their mother does care that they have not eaten anything for OVER TWELVE HOURS and are hungry little children. When the school feeds them a supplement at 9:00 they no doubt believe your kids have already had something at home since it is inconceivable to most people that you would have sent your poor little kids to school with NOTHING in their bellies.
How hard is it to put some peanut butter on toast and pour a glass of milk, or do you just lock them in their rooms till 9:00? And no, six and five year olds are not old enough to "help themselves." That is what parents are supposed to be for. So why did you become one if you were unwilling to perform the most fundamental tasks for your children?
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T.T.
answers from
Fargo
on
Have some veggies cut up and ready in the fridge and some fresh fruit. So if they are hungry they can grab it themselves.
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L.N.
answers from
New York
on
my kids are same age as yours. school's out for us too. they wake up around 7. i let them play for 30 min while i do breakfast. they eat around 7:30. around 9:30 i give them fruit for snack. 12:30 they get lunch. 2:30 they get snack, and 5 they get dinner.
it's a little off from their school schedule but hungry kids make up for cranky kids.
my kids go to bed between 7 and 7:30. with my kids, i have learned, even if i put them to bed 1-2 hrs later they will still wake up at 7. so i won't short change myself nor them taking away that extra hr of sleep, so i keep their bedtime the same. whether you do your work at 7 or 9 it's the same, you will be wasting that 30 min to 1 hr during breakfast. cater to their hunger rather than trying to stick to their school schedule.
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D.K.
answers from
State College
on
I would think maybe move it a little earlier at least, or a small snack of fruit, yogurt, etc when they first get up and then breakfast later. If you really want them to wait make sure they have something that will keep them busy and their minds off eating. I know I always eat within about 45 minutes of getting up, I'm hungry after not eating since dinner and will start to feel sick if I wait too long. So maybe just a quick snack as soon as they are up that is a finger food and then breakfast with you at 9am. That way you can still get your work done and they have had something to satisfy themselves. I don't think 9am is wrong though if that is when they are used to eating and I'm sure without having to get ready for school you are right and they are thinking about food more in the morning.
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J.L.
answers from
Oklahoma City
on
You are probably right that they are bored. I can certainly respect wanting to stick to their school schedule. We do the same around here. But getting up at 6 am and not eating for 3 hours is a long time. Especially since they probably haven't eaten in 12 hours or so since dinner. I certainly could not do it. Maybe you try putting out some bananas or a granola bar where they can get to it and help themselves. Then make the 9am feeding more of a snack. (or the 6am the snack and the 9am the breakfast)
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M.R.
answers from
Rochester
on
I cannot wait two hours after I wake up to eat. What time do they get up during the school year? Our bodies and metabolism change a lot and they very well may be hungry. If they are up, either give them a breakfast "snack" (fruit, a bowl of cereal, toast, etc.) or a meal. Why can't they give themselves breakfast? Teach them to make a few things and they are old enough to make some simple meals for themselves with minimal supervision. I would try giving them food first and if it turns out they are not hungry, try what you wanted to do originally.
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T.M.
answers from
Philadelphia
on
How about a nutrigrain bar when they first wake up? Then they can have their breakfast later. It is so hard for them to wait when they are little. We have a huge basket full of snacks. When they want a snack they ask me what they can have from the basket. There are granola bars, nutrigrain bars, pretzels, peanut butter crackers...this makes it a lot easier on me. I also stock the bottom bin of the fridge with juice boxes.
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K.B.
answers from
Kansas City
on
I think ages 6 and 5 are plenty old enough to get a morning snack on their own. Plus clean up after themselves. Washing their hands, getting spoon, bowl,etc. They can do this while you are trying to finish up your chores. You don't have to stop and make them a full meal.
Buy cereal bars, yogurt cups, keep cut up fruits/veggies in little plastic containers, etc. Things that will help curb that morning hunger but not to filling.
Kids metabolisms are different than ours. They are hungry when they wake up, it's not from being bored.
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S.T.
answers from
Washington DC
on
first off, i do think your kids are hungry if they're up at 6 and should have breakfast before 9. secondly, at 5 and 6 they are perfectly competent to help themselves to cereal and fruit. let them. thirdly, boredom is a constant whine over the summer holidays that has parents jumping through hoops to entertain. boredom is the best creativity motivator ever invented. parents need to provide tools for creative outlets (not tv) and stay out of the way.
khairete
S.
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S.T.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Perhaps you can try letting them go to bed an hour or so later and then they will wake up later. My dd is 7 and my ds will be 6 and I let them stay up until 10 pm. They wake up around 8 am and they get breakfast at 8:30, lunch at 11:30, snack at 2:30, dinner at 5:30 and another snack or lite meal at 8:30. I also work from home and they get to watch some tv after breakfast, around 10 am they do educational activities on my spare laptop, after lunch we do an arts and crafts project, they may play the wii or go outside for exercise, then free play.
Hopefully this will give you an idea of some things you can do so that they don't eat you out of house and home and get some work done as well =)
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C.D.
answers from
Washington DC
on
My husband works from home too and watches our son when he's not in school. He too always wakes up early and usually is asking for breakfast within 15 minutes of waking up. He is 8 now but he's been getting his own snacks since he was about 2. I watched him when he was almost 2 drag the dog food bucket over to the counter, climb the counter, and open the cabinet and get some crackers. So I do believe that most kids are capable of getting their own snacks. After seeing how he climbed I then created a snack drawer and its very popular with all the neighborhood kids now as they come over and always ask for the snack drawer, especially the ones whose parents have told me they aren't mature enough to make their own snacks and/or meals. I have granola bars, crackers, dried fruit, nuts, cereal, chips at times, breakfast bars, and even candy. Of course, he does have fruits in the fridge that he grabs too. Around age 6 I started letting him use a microwave and he can microwave things like sausages, french toast sticks, and things like that. I like not having to stop to get a snack and he likes the independence of getting to choose what he wants. In regards to drinks I often put those kids cups you get at restaurants with lids filled with milk in the fridge if its a full gallon and i think he would spill it. Once its half empty he can quite safely pour it himself for both drink and cereal. Good luck. I totally understand needing to get work done at home when you work from home.
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A.F.
answers from
Washington DC
on
Compromise and do breakfast at 8am. Be glad they are hungry for breakfast. It is the most important meal of the day. It gets your blood sugar up so you can think and work and play. AF
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M.C.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I think you underestimate your children. My daughter is 4 and has been fixing her own breakfast since she was 3-1/2. We put out a baggie with cereal in it and a bowl, a small container of milk in the fridge (we use the milk containers from the fast food places like McDs, etc and only put enough to cover her cereal so we don't have big messes), and her sippy with juice.
We also leave a small bowl of fresh fruit, applesauce cups, yogurt cups, and string cheese all within reach. She knows what her choices are, and she loves that she gets to have breakfast or a healthy morning snack by herself. If she doesn't want to eat when she gets up, or if she wants to wait to have breakfast with me, she will have a snack (yogurt, cheese, fruit) and then we will sit down together when I am ready to join her.
Does she make a mess sometimes? Absolutely. Does she try and eat "non-breakfast foods" on occasion? Sure. But 99% of the time she makes the right choices and is proud of what a big girl she is and how she can make her own breakfast in the morning. And before bed, one of her favorite things is to pick out her cereal for the next day!
"If you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day. If you teach a man to fish, he will eat for life". Kids are way smarter and more capable than we ever give them credit for. Try it out... they might just surprise you!
M.
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C.W.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I personally think that 9A is a little late to make them wait for breakfast if they have been up waiting for a while. I work at home too, so I totally understand what you are going through. However, with my kids, at least my daughter, she is completely moody and out of sorts until she eats something. When they were in preschool, they got "breakfast" at 9A also, but most of the time I had made them eat something light around 7A before they left and the 9A was mostly the snack. I'm not sure when they go to bed, but when you think about it, it is probably a good 10 to 12 hours since they last ate, and I like to eat when I get up too. they probably could wait before because they were rushing around getting ready to go, now they are just sitting and thinking about it. Although my daughter (6) is good at entertaining herself with arts and crafts, I found that when combined with my son (3), they feed off of each other and the boredom becomes more severe and the fights start, making it impossible to get anything done. I send her to camp so that I can get things done. If you can't find a camp, try telling them that they have to wait until a certain time, then they can have your attention for so many minutes. Good luck!
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K.F.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I can see the other points of view, but I say that you're right to make your own rules...when they are getting ready fro school, do they still wake up at 6am? 3 hours is a bit long to wait....but I do understand that kids do complain they are hungry when they are bored and I disagree that you should let them eat whenever they want to just because they are bored...my kids still want to eat because they are bored - and they are 12 and 9. It's annoying how kids confuse boredom and hunger (I think this could lead to eating disorders and obesity!), so I wouldn't just let them snack all day long either - then they won't be hungry for dinner! If you want to compromise and let them eat when they wake up, that could also be good for your work - at least they will be 'entertained' with food so you can concentrate and not have to hear them complain that they are hungry.
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K.L.
answers from
Washington DC
on
I didn't have time to read all the other responses, but as someone who always wakes up very hungry I could not imagine being made to wait hours before I could eat! Also, what is wrong with letting them have snacks? Just keep healthy snacks around, like apple slices or organic crackers.
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D.Y.
answers from
Detroit
on
Comin from dad.....
Yeah they r mature enuf to help themselves. When they want a popcicle, they ask 2 get 1 don't they?
I'm thinkin bout gettin a bottom drawer freezer just to show my snaggles that there are other kinds of fridges & to help herself when she gets the ok!
You have 2! I have a tupper-ware container full of grapes for snacks thru the day and my 6yr old has no problem fillin her lil bowl!
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W.S.
answers from
Norfolk
on
Is there some reason, other than they are out of school, that you feel they are bored? Are they whining about this all day, or just in the a.m. when you want to work? If they don't have a weight problem, and they only fuss about being hungry occasionally throughout the day, then they are probably hungry so feed them. What time do you get them up for school during the year? Are they getting up at 7 and being made to wait until 9 for breakfast? That is entirely too long for a hungry child to wait, and perhaps they are hungry at school too, but you just don't know it. Breakfast doesn't have to be a big production. Cereal and milk, fruit and toast, smoothies, breakfast bars. These things take almost no time, and they can get a bar, piece of fruit, and a juice or milk box without help, so I don't get why they would interrupt your work that much.
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B.A.
answers from
Minneapolis
on
Just feed them breakfast at 7. If they've been up for an hour they do in fact need to eat. If you don't have time to fix them something then, there are a lot of easy foods: good cereals, granola bars, hard boiled eggs or even cheese and crackers that you can have available for them to eat. Something with protein and a piece fruit should satisfy their hunger. You are in fact depriving them of food when they are hungry. In fact if their school does not feed them until 9, I think you should have something for them before they go to school.
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H.L.
answers from
Cleveland
on
Perhaps break breakfast up and be sure to add protein so they are not having a carb overload which causes cravings, as this will hold them longer. Start with a scrambled egg and cereal, then for later, cut up an apple or offer some blueberries. Cheese sticks and nuts (lots of protein) are great snacks too.
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K.C.
answers from
Washington DC
on
My five year old is actually beginning to enjoy the "big girl" role of helping herself a bit. My husband had a big phone conference at 7a the other morning and it was imperative she not disturb him (I left for work before that). We talked to her about it, set up the table the night before for cereal (including places and dishes for her "babies") and she was good as gold. If the milk carton is too heavy, you could pour some in individual containers that they can manage, cut up some fruit, etc. They may surprise you! Good luck.
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C.J.
answers from
Washington DC
on
while i do believe that hunger is often misread boredom, i wake up ravenous! if i had to wait three hours to eat in the morning i'd be a very grumpy (insert less pleasant word here) person. also, you might want to teach them to listen to their bodies and not stick to an arbitrary schedule. if you want real breakfast at nine than give them a piece of fruit at 630 or 700 to tide them over. that's what we do in my house.
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K.P.
answers from
Washington DC
on
My 7 year old daughter is the same way. She'd eat all day if I'd let her. I understand your need to get things done in the morning as I work from home as well. I always keep a bag of baby carrotts in my fridge and if she really bugs me for food I tell her to get some carrots from the fridge. She'll usually get just one and then leave me alone. Another trick I use in the morning on non school days (especially since I have two little ones under the age of three and don't want them woken up) is I tell my daughter if she's up before 8 am she needs to do something quietly in her room. She doesn't mind and a lot of times she'll actually fall back to sleep and I find myself waking her at 9:30.