Hi, my son is nearly 3 years old. We also have a 9 months old baby boy. Recently my son has been exhibiting behaviors that I simply don't know if they are normal. Here are some examples:
If he yells at his baby brother for making a grab for his stuff I say nicely but sternly that we don’t yell in this house and he can ask us for help. But he takes it really hard and starts crying: “don’t yell at Liam or don’t yell at me” even though I’m not actually yelling nor am I raising my voice.
If he hurts his brother or us (usually by accident) I say something like: “ouch, that hurt mommy or baby” and he gets really upset and runs over to his daddy and tells him that I or the baby hurt him.
If he pushes the baby I say that we don’t push or hit and he runs and cries and says: “we don’t hit Liam/me”
So it seems to me like he is missing some social cues but then again, maybe it’s just how 3-year-old boys are. He gets social cues in general. He notices when someone is happy/sad/angry and points it out. He gets concerned about his baby brother when he’s upset and crying. So he gets things that a boy his age should be getting.
So I guess I’d just like to know what you all think. I was hoping to get some replies before we have his 3-year appointment in November
Thanks!
I think your son is exhibiting normal jealousy of his sibling. My daughter did more of this a few months ago, but my son is 1.5 months older than your baby boy.
I have found it helpful to emphasize to my daughter that she is a BIG sister and enlist her in helping with her brother. It isn't a perfect cure for jealousy, but it helps a lot. Further, I remind her that her brother is a baby and that she is a big girl.
Hi Y.,
I have a son who is around the same age, and he has exhibited some similar behaviour at times (when I say, "Pinching hurts. Please don't pinch mommy," he responds, "Don't pinch me!")
I think that children at this age often like to imitate what is being done/spoken around them, and they will identify with others (especially parents/caregivers). It takes a while to learn some social behaviours, and it sounds like your son is fairly normal. I'd be interested in hearing what your pediatrician says, too, so please do update. Thanks!!
Best,
Nessa
As a M. of four, I'd say that this is very normal!
It sounds like you are doing everything you should, so keep it up, and this stage will pass or change...
Kids can be very quirky and express themselves in weird ways:) Just keep in tune to his concerns- there very well may be jealousy or a want for more attention on his end.
Your son is probably normal. Keep encouraging him to be gentle and kind. AF
I do not think he is missing any social cues. In fact, he is right on target - he is trying to deal with the emotions he has about having a new baby brother that surely everyone fawns over. My daughter was the same. It got better with time - but it also helped that I explained to family/friends how sensitive she was about losing the spotlight, and we all made efforts to make her feel cute/exciting/special/funny, etc.
