S.-
Welcome! This is a fantastic group of Mom's and I am sure that you will enjoy being a part of this group.
First. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I too had two babies who were "colicky" and so I know how hard it can be. But, I urge you not to give up. With my first baby, we had every test and eventually after 3 months, he was put on medicine for Reflux. While this helped, he wasn't totally better. We then went on a mission to find a formula that worked for him. After trying about 5 different ones, we eventually found Enfamil A/R. Ahhh, the happy baby that we had hoped for. Although, he still wasn't as happy as a lot of babies but much better.
My second (and last) baby struggled too. Given her brother's history, we had her checked for Reflux pretty soon after she exhibited symptoms. Although, she didn't start showing signs until she was about 5 weeks old. My son started showing signs with his very first feeding as he projectile vomitted right away.
Anyway, she didn't register as reflux on any of the tests but the Doctor decided to try medicine anyway. Her symptoms got better but she still struggled. We literally tried 10 different formulas before finding the right one and I took her to what I call a quack but he helped me figure out that she was indeed allergic to some foods.
Long story short, my daughter did best on Enfamil GentleEase. This "quack" did a bunch of tests where he held potential allergens above her belly and watched her muscles respond. If I hadn't seen her reactions with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it. But, because of him, we were able to find the best formula for her. And at 12 months, she is doing great.
Although to your other point. At around 9 months of age, my daughter started showing signs of food allergies. She developed patches of ezema (sp?), seemed congested all of the time, a horrible diaper rash (as my friend called it "the flesh eating diaper rash" and finally, developed dark circles under eyes after eating. Individually these symptoms are normal for babies but together, they told me that she had food allergies. With the "quacks" observation and the symptoms, I decided to take her to an allergist. She was diagnosed with 12 of the 16 initial allergens that they checked for. As a side note, there are like 150 allergens that they could be allergic to so we haven't even begun the process of exploring this crazy world.
So, to answer your questions more directly. I, as a Mom of two, believe with all of my heart and research that the term colic is a band-aid to other issues. I believe that most kids with colic have tummy issues and that you need to get to the bottom of what it is and not just accept this term. Your baby's life disposition depends on it. I also believe that tummy issues can be a pre-cursor and/or an indicator to allergies and that it is worth investigating.
Please feel free to e-mail me with any questions. I would be happy to answer any questions that you might have further. Also, do not waste your money on the colic calm. I ordered it and could not get past the look and smell much less put it in my baby's belly. It honestly looks like ink. Natural or not, I wasn't going to have my baby ingest it.
Hope this helps. Good luck to you. If you stick with it, you and your baby will be happier soon.
N.