This last week my 8.5 month old son has resisted both breastfeeding and drinking pumped milk from a bottle. the last 2 months or so he eats 4 times a day 8-10oz if from a bottle or downing 2 boobs. now we are lucky to get in one boob or 4-5oz from a bottle! even after 11 hours of sleep he will only eat one boob and then wants solid food! he isn't fussy or waking at night so i'm not too worried about his health. he will happily down solids and drink water from a glass or sippy cup. I know how important breast milk is for nutrition and his immune system, not to mention the fact that i love breastfeeding and i'm not ready to give it up. anyone have experience we babies weaning themselves this early??
My son did the same thing at five months. The Doc was not worried about his health and he is just fine, now two. Some kids are just like that and decide they like other things. I was sad also, but I wanted my baby to happy and not force things! Good Luck!
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D.C.
answers from
Spokane
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when my daughter was 6 months old, she wanted nothing more to do with breastfeeding, it was hard. she love the sippy cup and was eating some solids. I started pumping my breastmilk and putting the breast milk into the sippy cup and she was fine with that. she was healthy and fine and now she is 16. every child is different, and they let you know when they need to move on to the cup. my son breastfed for a year and half almost.
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C.M.
answers from
Portland
on
Understandably you are having a difficult time but be happy that your son is able to wean himself. Others have a much more difficult time getting their child/children to eat solid foods or drink anything other than breast milk or from a bottle. Embrace that you have a wonderfully independent child - it will bode him well in the future! I have one also, now 4 yrs old, and he is an absolute joy!
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D.C.
answers from
Eugene
on
Hi A.,
I have 3 kids (22, 19, & 16) and all 3 were a different breast feeding experience. I breast fed until they no longer had the desire to do so. I nursed my boys for over a year but my daughter was about the same age as your son when she showed more interest in bottles, cups & solids. They will need to stop at some point anyway so might as well take advantage of the moment of cooperation. If the Dr visits are OK, he is probably past the critical stage of needing the breast milk nutrients by now, and getting enough nutrition from everything else. I think they extinctively know when their bodies are ready to move on.
Good luck!
D. C.
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B.L.
answers from
Seattle
on
Don't worry...my son, Reeves, weaned himself at 7 months. He was already taking the bottle for daycare, and I pumped to supply for daycare. Reeves is above the 75th% for height and weight and hasn't had any problems. He does throw food off of the highchair though! :) I have heard of a lot of babies weaning themselves when they are ready. If you are still concerned, you might chat with your pediatrician. Good luck!
B.
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K.J.
answers from
Portland
on
That's pretty normal. It is hard to give it up, but as he takes more interest in solid foods, he may not need as much breastmilk. My son was very squirmy, and weaned himself completely by 14 mos, because he wanted to do other things. You've given Milo the very best, you can take comfort in that. The first three or four months are when breastmilk has the most benefit to baby! If he does wean himself completely in the next two or three months, you can find other neat ways to bond, like at bedtime: cuddling with a book and Mommy is fun.
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O.A.
answers from
Portland
on
My son also began to resist nursing at about the same age (he is now almost 11 months). I finally realized that he was just too curious about everything else going on around him to pay attention to nursing. He's a great eater, so was satisfying his hunger with solid foods, yet, like yourself, I wasn't ready to give up nursing--for both his sake and mine! I discovered that if I waited to nurse him until he was tired, he would be far more compliant. He now has one good, long nursing before bed and two shorter ones during the day--usually shortly after he gets up in the morning and when he's going down for his afternoon nap. I also try (when possible) to nurse him in a room he knows well with the lights dimmed and no other distractions around. This seems to be working well. We may not be acheiving the ideal amount of nursing time, but I feel like it is still far better than weaning all together! All the best to you and your son!
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J.M.
answers from
Portland
on
My niece did the same. you are not alone!
J.
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K.K.
answers from
Seattle
on
Oh don't worry a bit! (Although I understand your sadness, weaning is a very difficult thing to go through for moms emotionally.) I think it's a completely natural progression for babies. I have three boys, and the situation was different for me working part-time, full-time, and at home with each of them (so I pumped more with some and not at all with the last). They all did wean at slightly different times, but around 9 months of age. What I noticed is that they are more alert and interested in their surroundings at that time, so it is very hard for them to concentrate on breastfeeding. If a noise startles them or attracts their attention, they turn their head to look for the source of the noise and what is so much more interesting than a boob and milk! They are becoming more independent, so they need to bond with mom a little less (sadly). Also, they are starting to get alternate food sources such as finger foods and baby foods, so don't need the breast milk as much.
I also co-slept with my babies, and loved nursing at night as long as they were willing. So that went on for quite a while past daytime nursing, and mommy and baby both loved it.
Finally, teeth cut off the nursing entirely. Again, each baby was different in their response to my "no" and some took it better than others! But I couldn't take being bitten so often at some point, and we had to give it up.
Good luck to you!
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D.M.
answers from
Anchorage
on
Have you tried breastmilk in a sippy? Us mom's always freak out about nutrition, so this may help you feel better. You could also keep the nighttime feeding if that would be better for you but let you little one tell you what he needs.
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A.W.
answers from
Anchorage
on
Yes mine did. Even all 4 of mine potty trained early too. Might want to speak to docs about vitamins now. Cheese is good for them too if ya cant do milk.. I used goats milk till age 1 the stores sell it in a can. Good Luck
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C.W.
answers from
Seattle
on
My kids both cut way back around 8-12 months, and I suppose it was a time when I could have weined easily had I wanted to, but I kept offering and then it cut back to only before nap or bed, and then it went on till age 3 and I'm embarrassed to admit it but I breastbed my one daughter until she was 4. I finally stopped now that she is that age. It was just a relaxing habit that we got into before bed at night. She was fine to skip a night or two if we were busy or went out without her, but if I was around we just had our bedtime "nurse" for the longest time.
It had nothing (or very little) to do with nutrition at that point, I guess...just habit and bonding...anyway, if you aren't ready to stop, you probably don't have to, but cutting down does not mean stopping.
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J.W.
answers from
Seattle
on
It sounds like you're missing the closeness of breast feeding him. I have 3 kids, all who were breast fed, and I believe the interaction was just as important for me as it was for them. It was a stress-reducer for all of us. Now, with Milo not wanting any breast milk, either from the source, bottle or cup..... did you change your diet recently? Are you taking any new supplements or herbs? Different foods, vitamins, supplements can change the flavor of your breast milk and he may not like it any more. Breast is best for the first 6 months and if you can nurse longer, awesome! But he's growing up and his tastes are developing and changing. Are you wearing the pureed green beans yet? :-) Be mindful of his liquid intake and wet diapers, his weight... all those things I know that you're watching as a doctor. Take good care!
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L.L.
answers from
Seattle
on
Very normal. I remember that phase too, with both of my kids. I thought it was me, or something I ate, and was beside myself with the first, then much more settled and "educated" by the second. They are going through a few things. One, new levels of awareness. Their world has become much more interesting because they are at new levels of maturity. Two, they are probably sitting on enough reserves for now (non-spurt time). Don't stress! They eat when they need to. Adults are the ones that binge and over-eat. Babies know their limits and pretty much stick to them. While it's a wonderful bonding time, your baby is a bit distracted right now. See it as you having done your "job" well so far in that he/she is ok to not be quite as tight with you for the moment. You will have these back-and-forth moments OFTEN! Keep to your schedule, but don't force it. It needn't be stressful for either one of you. By the way, I nursed both kids, 1 for 13 month, the other for 15 months, all while working full time. They both went through the phase you talk about, but when it came time to actually ween them, it wasn't that simple. My kids are now 4 (girl) and 7 (boy). I am a widow, so a single mom. I am fortunate to have what I have, despite the loss in our life.
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A.A.
answers from
Portland
on
My 9 year old only breastfed for 2 weeks, per doctor's recommendation. I worked full time and chose not to breast feed and she is perfectly healthy. She did wean herself from the bottle at 10 months. At this time she also started walking and as soon as she could walk I would have her throw her own diapers in the garbage. She was already drinking out of sippy cups during meals at day care starting at 6 mos as well as at home. I offered bottles when we weren't seated at the table. She started tossing her bottles in the garbage so after the first few bottles were tossed I only offered sippy cups and she was done with bottles from that point on. She slept throught the night so she had her sippy cup when she woke. 9 years later she is just as independent as she was then, potty training was also a breeze. Now she is 9 going on 30!
I say no worries unless he isn't getting enough nutrients from the solids he is getting. Good luck.
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R.S.
answers from
Portland
on
Hi A.,
Children under 1 yr almost never wean themselves. Babies often go through stages like you are describing and they are very common around the age of 7,8,9, months. Sometimes babies won't nurse at all. It is sometimes called a nursing strike. I have dealt with it with both my sons who then nursed to 21 months and still going at 16 months. The most important thing to do is keep up your milk supply, so, if in doubt pump and drink Mother's Milk Tea!
As far as nursing goes, try nursing in a quiet, dark environment so there is as little distraction as possible. Take advantage of quiet times like first thing in the morning and before naps, bedtime and middle of the night. Offer it as often as you can. I would definitely recommend that you nurse him BEFORE you offer him solids and nurse him at a location other than where you feed him solids. Keep in mind that the nutrition he is getting from solids is secondary to that he gets from breastmilk so if he eats less solids, so what? He'll eat them at some point.
Hang in there-the nutrition of breastmilk cannot be matched and the relationship is worth times of trial!
R.
Mom to Jakob and Oskar
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H.C.
answers from
Seattle
on
Hi A.,
I understand your concerns. My first daughter weened herself at 21 months, and my second daughter started at around 9 months. I pretty much forced my breast on her in the mornings for another month, and even then she would only eat from one side. I have a nutrition degree from Bastyr University where we study natural health sciences(focus is on organic, whole foods, etc)which exasberated my concerns since I studied all the benefits of breastmilk so thoroughly. She just really wanted what we all were eating and eventually when it seemed unnatural to force her to nurse I gave into what she wanted and allowed her to wean. Now she is a brilliant 3 year old. When she weaned at such a young age I made sure to include foods in her diet that contained the vitamins and minerals breastmilk has, especially omega-3 fatty acids which are important for brian development and much more. I hope this is helpful. Good luck.
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J.K.
answers from
Portland
on
My first question is has anything changed in your diet or medications/supplements that might have changed the flavor of your milk? If not, he probably is ready to wean. My son started weaning at about that age (still drank milk from the bottle, but didn't want to nurse). I can understand how you feel about not being ready... I had to work very hard to breastfeed and was looking forward to 2 years, not just 8 months! I would continue offering the breast as long as he is not resisting. (When my son turned away, I had to give up). You could continue to pump, and if he won't take it from bottle/cup, you can mix it in with cereal, soup, yogurt... whatever. Hope this helps... and good job keeping it up!
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J.L.
answers from
Corvallis
on
My daughter is about a month older than your son. She was also showing very little interst in nursing a few weeks ago (and was this week for about a week prior too). She prefered to have formula and feed herself solids. I went ahead and weened her (I have to admit I really miss it).
I think it is a personal preference on your part though. Have you had something different that might of affected the taste of your breast milk? Have you tried putting the breastmilk in a cup? If you are having a difficult time getting him to drink breast milk (either from you or a cup/bottle) make sure you supplement with formula till he is a year old. Hang in there!
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C.H.
answers from
Seattle
on
Hi A.,
My 5 month old weaned himself and we were frustrated, too, until I found out I was pregnant again! If he is eating solids and is happy, I know the hardest thing for you to hear, but he is probably done with nursing.
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T.B.
answers from
Spokane
on
My second son weaned himself at 9 months. No warning, no easing off...just refused. He was very anxious to be like his almost three year old brother and wanted to do things just like big brother did, which meant drinking from a cup. We skipped the whole bottle step completely and went right for the sippy cup. I was upset and disappointed because I had nursed big brother until he was two and I got pregnant with the next one.
If he's ready for solid food and gaining weight appropriately, there's no reason to not let him eat as he wishes. I did keep pumping for a while and mixed the breastmilk into his rice cereal and other foods so he would get that extra nutrition (plus I was engorged with the sudden stop). I slowly, over the course of about 3 months, pumped a little less every time and that made it an easier transition for me physically. I still had a lot of frozen milk which I kept using to mix into his foods until it was all gone.
Good for you that you have done such a great thing for your child!
Hmm... Our doctor told us at 9 months to give solid food first, then offer breast/bottle and that it is not necessary to give him juice or water. It worked wonders for our son who has just last week taken his last of the breast. He's 13.5 months old now and started taking himself off of breast milk at about the same time as your little one.
S.
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H.B.
answers from
Seattle
on
My children (now 3 and 20 months and extremely bright, happy and healthy) both weaned around that age, both started dropping feedings around 6-7 months and were completely done nursing by 9-10 months. It bothered me at the time, because I wasn't really ready to let it go, and had heard so often to try to nurse for the full first year of their life. There really is very little advice for mommies of early/self-weaning babies! But now I realize that it is a natural progression for babies to want to move on to the next stage of nutrition, enjoying their solids more and more at that age, and becoming more independent. I think it can get a little silly to try to "force" something to continue that is really necessary for the early months but not so much at that age, and keep your child from naturally grasping the next stage of maturity. There are many other, new ways to have closeness and bonding time with your son as he grows without artificially extending his dependence on breastfeeding (or whatever other "baby" activities we have a hard time letting go). On the other hand, I certainly have nothing against those whose babies nurse longer, I would have liked mine to want to!
Neither of my two were ever bottle fed, and refused formula, so I resorted to mixing as much saved breast milk and powdered formula into their meals until they were one and able to take cow's milk. As I saw other moms struggle to wean at later ages, I realized in some ways I was lucky to have my children "choose" it on their own, and not have that guilt of taking it away from them. It's always sad to let go of a stage of babyhood (probably nursing is the hardest!) but rewarding as well as you move on to new exciting things together!
Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and by all means don't feel guilty, whether you choose to try to continue or to let him wean himself!
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C.C.
answers from
Eugene
on
My 9.5 mo. son did the SAME EXACT thing. He will be 10 months on the 27th of March and at 8.5 he did the same. He also will not take breastmilk or formula from a bottle or sippy cup. He will take water in a sippy cup and only breastfeeds on one side now and then pulls off and doesn't want more. He also LOVES food and eats a ton. He sleeps 11 hrs. a night. I too am worried that he's not getting enough fluids and nutrition. I now breastfeed in the morning, mid-day, and before bed. He breastfeeds best at night and that's it. WE see the doc for a 10mo. checkup soon and I will ask what to do. I even tried a little cow's milk mixed with formula (with many different opinions on giving him this) and he doesn't want anything. I am worried about his nutrition too. Maybe I am feeding him too much solids??? I am worried since he won't take breastmilk or formula from the bottle or sippy cup. Have you gotten any good advice?
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S.S.
answers from
Portland
on
My oldest daughter did the same thing at that age too. I wanted her to still get the nutrition of breast milk so I started giving her my milk in a cup at feeding times with her baby food. She loved it! He might find the new experience exciting and you will love the fact that you won't have to put him to bed with a bottle. :) Good luck!
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A.T.
answers from
Portland
on
He may be... but he may also be holding a "strike". They can do this every so often. Don't be too worried. But if I were you I would monitor his weight & bring him to a doctor if he beings to wither not gain weight or lose it.
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A.H.
answers from
Portland
on
My son did the same thing between 7 and 8 months. He was so interested in what was going on that he didn't care to eat. I knew that there was no way he was going to wean at 7 months (he never had formula), so I persisted through. I would take him into a darkish/quiet room to nurse for 1-2 months while this stage passed. My son continued to nurse until he was 3. Keep at it! :)
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E.F.
answers from
Portland
on
Hi A.,
As Rebecca and a few others said, this is developmentally normal, but it is NOT good for a baby to wean in most cases during the first year... it may be a strike, and I would try the darker quieter room technique, as well as lots of sleepy times nursing and offering pumped milk in a sippy.... DO keep at it :-) I also second looking at diet and meds, especially any hormone based meds such as birth control; even the mini pill can really have an impact for some women. Also it may signal a return or be caused by a return of your period; that can change the older baby's response to nursing, but it is usually temporary. Hang in there and keep watching his intake of fluids and trying to offer but not push him to nurse; as he gets used to new motor skills he will come back to breastfeeding. Good luck!!
E.
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C.W.
answers from
Seattle
on
A.,
He may be deciding to wean early or he might be doing a breastfeeding strike. Has anything changed recently? Any added stresses to the household or on you? Any dietary changes? Sometimes a baby will "strike" when there is added stress or changes or a particular food introduced to the mom's diet they don't like. Don't give up yet. Try to work with your child. Take him into a quiet room. Hold him skin to skin with you for a while if you can to entice him back to the breast. Sometimes a slightly sleepy baby will nurse easier during this time. I would also check out The Breastfeeding Book by Dr. Sears. He suggests things to do if your baby is "striking." If all else fails, then he really might be ready to be weaned. Hope this helps!
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J.B.
answers from
Richland
on
It is pretty normal for babies to go through a nursing strike at this age because they are interested in food and everything else around them. He probably isn't trying to wean, and most come back, but he is at the age where nursing is a secondary form of nutrition. He will start eating more solid food and nursing less now, but you don't have to give it up, just keep offering it, and pumping to keep a supply till he is ready to do it again. I nursed my son until he was 21 months old, and he didn't want it except to go to sleep and I started night training him at that point, and he wasn't interested if I wouldn't put him to sleep, so he decided to be done, and I was sad, and miss it still sometimes, so don't give up if you aren't ready to. Good luck.
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A.B.
answers from
Portland
on
I just want to second the thought that your son is probably on a nursing strike. Although none of mine have gone on strike, I have attended La Leche League meetings for years on and off and it seems like a really common thing. Several things may be contributing; like the previous poster said, distractions may be a huge factor. Try to find a quiet place at home where you go to nurse, that might help Milo focus. Another thing that might contribute is teething; the pain of teeth coming through gums and the funny feeling of having teeth might be a factor. He is also transitioning to more solid foods. Whatever you do, don't give up the nursing if you can help it! Even a little nursing gives passive immunity to Hib and possibly other diseases and I just recently read an article that some researchers found stem cells in breast milk. Who knows what that might mean for your son's immature digestive tract! For more support, there is a LLL meeting this Tuesday at Epsworth church (28th? and Hawthorne) at 10am or pick up a copy of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.
Good luck!
A.
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A.M.
answers from
Seattle
on
My twins weaned themselves- one at seven and a half months, the other at 8. I had supplemented them with a bottle, formula but what kind I don't remember. My oldest would look around the room while nursing, and if he spotted a bottle, it was over for nursing! The youngest just slowly stopped.
They kept on with the bottle, but began taking sippy cups too, and at first cooked cereal, then other foods.
It was explained to me- and I totally believe- that babies will sometimes go for the easiest way to eat, while of course still getting the so necessary amount of cuddling.
My kids grew up healthy and strong, without weight problems, and so will yours. The most important time for breast-feeding is in the first few months, with colostrum for immunities, and easy to digest mother's mi9lk. Then their own immune and digestive systems begin to start to mature, and they begin to be able to eat and drink other things as well.
Don't worry- it isn't you or your milk, it's just what your baby has "decided" he needs right now.
Best wishes and congratulations on your baby!
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D.M.
answers from
Seattle
on
My now 12 year old was a preemie and she stopped breast feeding on her own at 7 months. I just went with it. Then the flip of that was my now 11 year old boy who NEVER took a bottle and breastfed until just over a year. Both are healthy happy kids. I say don't worry about it. Everyone is different (remember baby's are little people with opinions too)and do things when they feel ready to.
D. in Sammamish
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S.L.
answers from
Portland
on
My son did the same thing at 91/2 months old. He was teething at the time, and when he bit me I would tell him no and tap him on the cheek with my finger. I figured it was my fault in scolding him that made him not want to nurse, but he was just ready to quit. By then he was already eating cereal and fruit, so I just put him on formula until he was one year old. They only need to nurse for a year, then you can give them milk. They tend to make their own decisions. Sounds like he may be done. Good luck.
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K.C.
answers from
Seattle
on
My son started to wean the same way around 9 months old. He just wasn't as interested, would get fussy while nursing, and was really impatient about waiting for the milk to let down. I had planned to nurse until at least 12 months, so I was not ready for this!! But remember that when to wean is about the right time for both mother and baby - you might not be ready, but he may be, like it or not!
My daughter continued to nurse for a full year, but she didn't drink as much and was happy with 4-5 oz. for 4 feedings a day. It seems like not enough, but with the solid foods, it may be plenty. Around 11 months she started to wean straight to whole milk (wouldn't take formula).
If your son isn't resisting the breast, I would continue to nurse and just realize that he'll probably be happy with less each time. If he is resisting, you may want to do what I did with my son. I began to drop the daytime feedings and gave his formula during the day but still nursed morning and night - I think he was more apt to want to snuggle at those times and happily continued our twice a day nursings for another 6-8 weeks! Try skipping a nursing here and there and see what happens - maybe you can stretch it longer - if not, follow his lead.
Remember that by nursing already for close to 9 months, you've given him a great start. (My kids are now 3 and 5 and are super healthy and great healthy eaters!) The more you nurse, the better - but don't feel bad if baby decides when he's had enough!
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M.T.
answers from
Seattle
on
My daughter weaned very abruptly a few weeks ago, just before she turns 9 months. She got her first tooth a few weeks before that and one day she bit me - hard. I yelped and sternly said "no." She immediately did it again and again I yelped and said no even more sternly. That was it :-( She has not latched on since and I have resigned to pumping what little milk I am still producing and giving it to her from a bottle along with all the solids and formula that she is eating. It makes me sad the the nursing is over, and that it ended so abruptly, but my daughter seems to be doing fine. I know that she already got the vast majority of the benefit out of nursing so if she's ready, I guess I need to be ready too.
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M.S.
answers from
Portland
on
It is so common for babies this age to do this. If you wanted to, now would be the ideal time to wean because he is ready and it is self directed (no stress). By this age he has gotten almost all the benefits medically and healthwise. By 12 months, there are no medical benefits anymore, and it tapers off from birth.
But, if you are not ready, then don't! You will forever look back and wish you had tried harder. If you can stick with it, he should go back to normal after a few weeks. The problem is that he is realizing that there is so much to see and do, and he simply is not interested in being confined to such a restricting position. He is also really slowing down in growth, so he doesn't need as much food. He is also able to eat more solid foods and is thrilled with the adventure of it.
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A.E.
answers from
Portland
on
Hi A.-
I've had similar ups-and-downs with my daughter who is 20 months old. Keep trying at different times of the day. If you are feeding him 4 meals a day, then he's not as hungry. I had to work with mu husband adn myself to balance the amount of food with breast milk....the more we fed her, the less she wanted my breast. But, for health and comfort reasons we wanted to continue breastfeeding. We still do and have down times when she's teething or when we travel. Consider also the developmental stages....if he's just learning to sit up or walk, it's normal for them to lose interest. But we found that as these movements/stages became more engrained in her, she had more interest again in breastfeeding. We never wanted to breastfeed to sleep (didn't want her to become dependant on it) but had to throw that idea out to preserve breastfeeding. She now nurses as soon as we get up, before naptime, bedtime and occasionally during the night. Good luck. A.
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C.M.
answers from
Richland
on
He may be on a nursing strike. Keep offering him the breast, lower distractions. Don't give up! Many babies go through a nursing strike at this age.