I'm not really familiar with funerals. I want to ask if it's okay (proper etiquette) to deliver flowers ourselves to a funeral instead of having a flower shop deliver it? Also, is it okay to deliver the flowers to the home/house instead of the funeral home? An elderly neighbor (wife) passed away and we want to go to the funeral as well as do something for the family (husband). I don't know if it's proper to have flowers there for him at the house. I was thinking of bringing food there as well so that's why I thought of giving him the flowers. Please advise....Thanks!
Most people suggested the flowers should be delivered to where the funeral is being held. Just make sure that the florist has the right location and time. The family will make sure the flowers make it home.
Thank you everyone who responded. We sent flowers to the funeral home in time for the viewing today and the funeral tomorrow. I plan to make some easy to heat up food after a little bit of time since his family has already cooked food for him. He's the only one living next door now. We also raked and mowed his yard just to help him out a little bit more. We attended the viewing. It was sad but he seems to have good family support...which was good. Thanks.
I would make a dish of food for the husband or give him money, i would not bother giving him flowers.
Also, send flowers to the funeral home, that is very nice !
Unfortunaly I have had to deal with many funerals this past 2 years and it all comes down to preference. When my son passed I recieved flowers both at the funeral home and at home. It was always nice to know when I walked into the house and seen the flowers that he was missed by many. I personally have delivered my own flowers to the funeral home too. It is a special way to show your grief also. Just know which director is in charge of the funeral and if the funeral home even allows it. You can usually call ahead to find those things out. And food is always a comfort thing. Although you might want to see if anyone else is thinking the same thing, enough food is a good thing but too much can become a waste. We had a get together after my sons and for several weeks later a bunch of friend and family would bring over meals for my daughter and I so I didn't have to do much but concentrate on healing and trying to raise my 21 month old at the time. Hope this helps. Although I did more rambling than anything.
It is very comforting to have flowers or food delivered to the home. You or the item may not be acknowledged by the person due to grief, but it is appreciated.
Something like a lasagna that can be frozen and heated up quickly with little thought is often nice for someone just newly widowed.
He is so fortunate to have you as a compassionate neighbor.
Hugs,
A.
I don't think that I would bring flowers to the funeral; if you want to bring them yourself, I would bring them to the house. And it's always nice to bring food so the family can have some time off from cooking!
Unless you were particularly close to the couple or live far away, I've always found that prepared meals ready to heat in containers is the most helpful thing you can do for the family. Usually close family or far away family and friends send flowers as meals may not be practical in this situation. The last thing the husband will have time for or want to do for a little while is prepare his meals.
God bless your neighbor and his family.
When my father died about 3 years ago a ton of people brought food to my aunt's house (our family's "meeting" place), and that was great. We really appreciated it. However, somebody showed up with or dropped off a huge bag of paper plates, paper cups, napkins and plastic utensils. It was awsome with so many people in and around to not have to worry about washing dishes or having dishes clean. That might be something to think about. Another thing that was nice was someone brought a bunch of pop and juice. It was just really great to not have to think of those things. I know a lot of people bring some kind of casserole, but keep in mind not everyone has the same taste. We got some really strange food brough to our house. Anything that can make the family's life easier is great. I thinkit is perfectly appropriate to have flowers go to the house instead of the funeral home. I know I appreciated it.
If you do want to bring a casserole or some type of dinner, you might consider waiting 2 or 3 weeks until things have quieted down. I know for my grandparents the weeks after the funeral and when everything was "getting back to normal" was the hardest time for them and that was when they could have most used a meal or two dropped off by a caring neighbor.
I have asked around and it seems that the flowers should be delivered to where the funeral is being held. Just make sure that the florest has the right location and time. The family will make sure the flowers make it home. I hope this helps.
Bringing a meal and flowers to the house is a good gesture. A plant is nice too. If you decided to have the flowers (or plant) at the funeral, I would have them delivered. The funeral home will take care of placing the flowers where they go. They will make sure the 'plants' get to the home after the funeral is over. The cut flower arrangements usually stay at the gravesite.
