Is ADHD or Something Else?

Updated on May 14, 2007
R.B. asks from Gardner, KS
5 answers

I have a 3 year old son whom I believe is possible ADHD. His behavior is just overwhelming me. I can't seem to keep up. He's extremely distructive, becoming more physical and very defient. I have tried so many things to calm him down, slow him down and it seems to me that nothing is working. I haven't contacted a doctor yet because I just am tired of dealing with doctors. Nutritional wise I don't allow very much sugar in his diet. NO caffiene, candy, cookies, anything that I know would make him hyper. He can't eat fruit because we'd end up in the bathroom all day. I'm just really frustrated. And it is also effecting my 4 year old daughter and making her become physical because she is definding herself against him and sometimes that really just makes matters worse. I have tried time outs and they don't work it just starts a bigger fight. I am trying to stay calm but he knows that and eggs me on even more. Some times I just wander if there is ever going to be a break from it.
I really need some advice or suggestions..PLEASE!!!
Chelle

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D.R.

answers from Kansas City on

I can see how this would get so frustrating.

#1 He could be acting out from the change of the move. With kids it seems like changes that we cope with they can't cope with and his way could be acting out...he gets attention that way.

#2 I would also limit Red Dye #40...studies have linked it to ADHD. A LOT of food have Red Dye #40 so its impossible to totally wipe it out of your diet, but you can limit it. That has been a life-saver in my household.

#3 Is he catching violence on TV? I had a child in my care that watched Peter Pan (yeah yeah its Disney, but Captain Hook fights the crocadile in it) and started wanting to fight with the other kids. You would think that it wouldn't be something as that...but we stopped watching Peter Pan and its been a lot better.

#4 Is he getting enough exercise and other activites to occupy his time. He might need more physical activity (running in a field, kicking a ball) to get all this extra energy out that he is trying to get out negatively now.

You could try a behavior chart or jar. Figure out something that would work with the kids....You could use a baby food jar and fill it up with something when the kids are good, take it out when the kids are bad....if they get it full, they get a small reward.

Both kids should be able to comprehend that it is not ok to fight. I would keep trying TIME OUTs...for me, I don't start the time until the child is quiet and sitting still. 3 year olds are very strongwilled and independent and do not want to listen. What has worked with my daughter is that I can take away her favorite toy (she wouldn't get it back until the next day or in some cases for a couple days)

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T.C.

answers from Kansas City on

HI R.-
I am new here, but couldn't help but to respond to your request. I am a mental health therapist and I primarily work with children ages 2 to 12. And while I hesitate to give my professional advice on this board, I would encourage you to look at other things that could be going on. ADHD is so well known that a lot of people see the behavior you see and think that it must be what is going on. The fact of the matter is that almost EVERY mental health problem with small children looks just like ADHD (impulsivity, hyperactivty, lack of concentration etc...) The other thing that you should know is that it is NOT diagnosable until age 5, anyone who tells you otherwise is not ethical. Other areas you might want to look at are sensory disorders and Pervasive Developmental disorders. These are often misdiagnosed as ADHD. I would ask your pediatrician for a referral for a complete developmetal evaluation at Children's Mercy or KU and this is a great place to start. An occupational therapist can help diagnose sensory disorders. Pervasive Developmental disoders can be evaluated by teh team, they do not always entail low cognitive developement, so do not think that this is not the case just because he is a bright kiddo. Sensory disorders are treated with occupational therapy. Some of my clients with these problems wear a weighted vest to help them stay calm, or use a brush on the arms and legs to help calm.
Lastly, I would say to look for any sort of trauma that might have happened before now. Trauma symptoms and ADHD look almost exactly alike in kidddos under the age of 5. If this is the case I would suggest play therapy.
Hope this is helpful! Good luck and take care!
T.

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H.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree a lot with what Donna posted. It could just be a phase of the kids testing your limits. The problem is that it is unacceptable behavior so you need to maake sure that is very clear. In my house, if my daughter is acting out like that, she is tired & bored. I will correct her behavior and then put her into something challenging. I will have her clean house, work on her computer preschool programs, or other challenging activities. Also try what Donna has written too.

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P.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I would really give a careful look to diet. Since you said fruits upset his stomach I was thinking maybe he something going on digestive wise (or perhaps with blood sugar in response to foods)

Some foods that people are sensitive to are in LOTS of foods and hidden....corn is one that comes to mind (My nephew who was dx with ADHD livedon corn chips, nachos, pop corn, cheetos, hot dogs and red popcycles.......petty much a processed food nightmare- and when I suggested diet might play a role ---she told me 'no way' we tried that route and it did nothing. Although I suspect all she did was limit sugar ---and there are so many sugars (high fructose corn syrup)

Dr. Sears has a really good book on ADHD that you can probably get from the library.

M.A.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi R.,

I will just ad a little comment to the responses you had already.

Have you tried getting rid of toxic chemicals in your house? The harsh chemicals contained in common household products had been linked to ADD and ADHD and in many cases it had disapeared just by switching to naturally based products in you house.

It doesn't cost you anything to try and it can save you from headaches in the future. Whatever you do, please don't put him into medicine. Try anything first.

Hope it helps!

Mariana

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