Is 14 Months Too Old to Incorporate a "Lovey" into Bedtime and Naptime?

Updated on October 23, 2007
R.H. asks from Rathdrum, ID
9 answers

My son is 14 months old and he's never used a lovey. We co-sleep for the last half of the night. He sleeps in his crib for about 6-7 hours, then he wakes up and I bring him to bed with me (my hubby works nights) for the remainder of the night. As much as I enjoy him sleeping with me, I would like for him to eventually sleep in his crib for the entire night since my hubby and I are planning baby number 2. I've just recently weaned him from breastfeeding. He did surprisingly well with the whole weaning process (I think it was me that had the more difficult time!). The problem is that he still uses me to help himself go back to sleep. Since he can't nurse anymore, he wakes up wanting some sort of comfort to fall back asleep. He usually rubs my arm or stomach to help himself fall back asleep and sometimes he'll lift up my shirt and nuzzle his face against my stomach. Since he's been doing this, it makes me think that a lovey just might be the solution. I'm just not sure if he's too old to start using a lovey. Any advice?

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B.G.

answers from Anchorage on

I think a lovey is a great idea. My son responded well to a teddy/blankie lovey with satin trim. He loved to rub the satin trim on his skin. You can buy the wide satin trim in really cute patterns like pooh bear etc at Joanns. Maybe you could attach it to a bit of polar fleece- B.

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W.W.

answers from Seattle on

I found the greatest "lovey" verison for my daughter and thought I would pass it along. GUND makes flat stuffed animals which have the fuzzy fur on one side and satin on the other. The Mini-Lammy is the hit at our house. Abby has 3. One goes to day care and the others rotate to allow one to be washed now and then. She takes Lammy and covers her eyes when she lays down--even at day care. We don't go anywhere without Lammy. Abby is almost 22 months and I don't care how long she has it.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.L.

answers from Seattle on

I dont' think there's anything wrong with that. It's probably just what he needs! My son has had several different ones....blanket at daycare...at home, a lion. I didn't even quite realized the lion had become one at first because of the blankets, but when I send him to stay with my mom, she started telling me he would wake up and cry and could i please send the lion with him (he never woke up at home at that point). He turned 3 in July and still sleeps with it. They will be come less important as they get older. When My son first had his lion, he had to have it every night before bed...now he sometimes gets into bed without it and I go look for it because i know he likes to have it. One rule I did make was that the lion never left the house. That way it can't get lost in a store (i had a stuffed toy lost in a store when I was about 2 and still remember losing it and making my mother drive for an hour one way to look for it). At daycare, he has his own blanket, so he doesn't need one there. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Seattle on

I think its a great idea. My daughter just turned 15 months Monday and she uses one. She started using it when I couldn't breast-feed anymore, which was when she was 6 1/2 months old. She can go to sleep by herself and go back to sleep if awakened. Good luck!!!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.H.

answers from Seattle on

I think that it is a great idea for two reasons: 1 is the seperation anxiety and 2 is the approach/avoid stage. I think the lovey is the perfect transitional object to help him keep your love nearby. Maybe if you both cuddle with it, it will smell like you and be even better. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.M.

answers from Anchorage on

I have a 14 month old little boy also, who has been co-sleeping with me since he was about 5 months old. I had a really hard time with him sleeping at all on his own, even at naptime. He absolutely hates his crib! Screaming and crying happens a lot! Anyways, I've started school again so Marley is in daycare a few hours per day, where they take naps on a little cot. I brought Marley's favorite stuffy, a dog, and a very soft blankey and his daycare says he's started sleeping for an hour or more on his own and he snuggles with his puppy dog. I think this is a great transition, since he is still nursing and is used to nursing himself to sleep. At home, I've also made the spare bedroom into Marley's Bedroom, and let him start sleeping in a "big bed" (a twin). He's doing great sleeping on his own. He still wakes up a couple times in the night, so I go into his room and climb into bed with him until he goes back to bed. But I don't bring him into my bed anymore. I've been doing this for about a week and a half now, and Marley seems to be doing great. I think it helps that he knows that he's not totally on his own; that he can still snuggle with me. And in the morning, when he wakes up, I let him crawl into my bed and snuggle there. I dunno, something to think about. Oh, I also have the mattress just on a box spring, not a bed frame, so it's low enough that he can get in and out without hurting himself. Okay, well I hope this helps; good luck!

~ Mel

1 mom found this helpful
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R.B.

answers from Anchorage on

I agree with the other moms -- awesome idea! However ... I tried repeatedly to introduce a blanket/stuffed animal to my daughter to no avail. So this message is just encouragement that if it doesn't work, that's OK, too! I do keep a couple of "regular" stuffed animals in her crib, though, so while she doesn't really have an attachment to them, they're kind of her nighttime buds.

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A.P.

answers from Bellingham on

I think my daughter was about that age when I introduced a lovey. I just made it part of her bedtime/naptime routine. She knows its time for a nap when I tell her to find her kitty. And right after bath and jammies she gets her kitty. I hope it works out for you.

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K.M.

answers from Anchorage on

Hi R. -

I just have to ask - what the heck is a "lovey"? I have never heard this term.

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