In-laws Contributing to Financial Issues

In Law questions are so difficult. When I started my business I borrowed $1800 from my son and his wife was against it. I made sure that I returned the money with interest in 3 months instead of the 6 we agreed upon and have never made that mistake again. Obviously the family dynamics between your husband and in laws are such that anything you say will be seen as controlling or nagging. I would chalk it up to a gift but let your husband know you will not agree to helping them in the future no matter what the deal is.
I would give my mother in law anything she needed, but she wouldn't ask for anything and wouldn't take it if she thought it was making things difficult for us. My husband does so much for my mom, but she wouldn't let him if it caused any problems.
I think the dynamics are the key and your fil is a taker without regard to others consequences. Now you know the ground rules so for the future just say no.
K. @ The Nestingplace

How extremely selfish of your husband's parents to put you in this situation and how spineless(sorry, but true) of your husband for not putting YOUR family first. You are raising 4 children!!! Is your husband aware that the Bible says to leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife when you get married? Maybe the car should be a gift, but I would never give them any more money or anything for that matter and I would for sure confront them and ask why they went back on their word about paying for the car. Also, if you do write it off as a gift, make sure they sign a contract for that because when something goes wrong with it--it'll be your fault:)

I agree with Kay, call it a "gift" and don't ever loan them money or join in any dealings with them again.

A friend told me to never lend any money with expectations of getting it back. If you can't afford to give the moeny away (or car, etc.), then you can't afford to lend it either. It's a good policy to follow.

I would also suggest coming up with a budget for the family and sticking to it. Include in the budget, money just for you, money just for him, and the rest for the family. If he wants to loan money out, it should come out of his budget. Not yours or the family's. It saves some of the arguments over money.

Oh I always hate these types of issues. There's no way out of it without causing hurt feelings and possibly building a rift between your two families...meaning you and your husbands and your husband and his parents.
And really, until your husband will hear it...you can't do anything about it. After that the only solution would be to reposes the car.

I know I'd be pretty upset.

If your husband can't handle that they made an agreement to PURCHASE the car, that has caused YOUR family to make sacrifices in order for his parents to have an easy ride, than you need to be the one to confront his parents. After all, it affects you just as much as it affects him.

And the fact isn't that they shouldn't have to pay b/c they are family, especially given the circumstances that they are financaily helping out another family member, but that they made an agreement and haven't lived up to it (which makes them liars).

Obviously, if they had said they want the car for free, you nor your husband wouldn't have given it to them in the first place, so by not asking for your money and drafting up a payment schedule that both parties sign (it's not too late to do that) than you are agreeing to give the car away for free.

Sorry, family financial problems can be difficult, but you are definately right in this case.

I feel for you, unfortunatley there is nothing you can do. I am in the exaact situation with my hubz and his MOTHER. She wnats everything does not work and expects. There is really no use in reminding him of these things unless you want your hubby to explode and break out into a huge arguement. Thats what happened to me.
Good luck,
T.