I'm So Lost and Confused (C-sections)

K.,
Isaiah 41:10,13 "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you."

First, take a deep breathe, close your eyes, and ask God for wisdom. Know that He knows what is best for you and Sierra. Second, pray that God would give your doctor wisdom and understanding.
Then, my recommendation is to have a very honest and open conversation with your OB. Tell him that you are confused because of the difference in what the sonogram tech told you and what he said. Tell him your concerns about doing the right thing for your baby. Depending on your relationship with him, you might even be able to say something like "You wouldn't recommend a c-section just for scheduling purposes, would you?"
Then, be open to hear his responses.

Now, here's something else. I had always planned on having vaginal deliveries, but after 3 days of labor and contractions, I had not dilated past a 1, and my first son started having heart decelerations (sp?). We pretty much did an emergency c-section, and although it was definitely not what I had in mind,it went perfectly. Luke is a wonderful, beautiful, healthy 2-year old now, and his brother Seth (also delivered via c-section because of the first), is about to turn 1. Yes, complications can happen, but they can happen in a vaginal delivery as well. Don't let fear guide you in this; fear has a tendency to cloud judgment.

I hope this helps.

Hi K.,

I just had my son in Sept. The labor was 18hours and most of those hours my Dr. was trying to get me to do a c-section (aparently I wasn't dialating fast enough for him). I also felt that his schedule was more important than my desire to have a vaginal birth. My son was handling labor fine so their was really no reason to do a c-section. I really felt strongly that I could do a vaginal birth so I kept refusing the c-section. I am blessed to a have a praying mother-in-law because while i was in labor she was in the room praying and her prayers caused me to dialate 6 cm in 30min (the nurse was amazed) and i was able to begin pushing. Do what you think is right...Dr. aren't always right. If you put the situation in God's hands he can work a miracle. Good luck and God Bless!

You sound like you know what's best for you! I don't think your doctor has YOUR best interest in mind (or that of your baby's for that matter). I have had a Cesarean AND an HBAC (home birth after cesarean) and I'll tell you that the C-Section is NO picnic - AND the dystocia stuff is generally a cop out. It is EXTREMELY rare for a mother to make a baby that she cannot possibly birth vaginally. Position of the baby makes a lot more difference than weight. A fat baby generally births well because fat is squishy and molds well when coming out!

My daughter was 9lb9oz (C-Section after a 42 hour labor - she was posterior and her head was tilted in a weird way...she wouldn't descend even after 3 hours of pushing) and my HBAC son was 10lb1oz (after less than 5 hours of TOTAL labor - including less than 30 mins of pushing....Oh and I didn't tear at all either)! I'm only 5'3" and average-sized. No one believes me when I mention the size of my babies! LOL

Anyway, that's my 2 cents. You should visit the ICAN website for more information and perhaps even join the ICAN mailing list/yahoo group. http://ican-online.net/index.php?option=com_wrapper&I...

OH and editing to add - you should try and find a doula in your area! I know that there are several in the DFW area that are WONDERFUL. If your care provider won't be YOUR advocate, then a doula would be a great resource for you! If cost is an issue, still take the time to call someone up and talk to them as many will work on a sliding scale or even for free!

http://www.douladallas.com/
http://www.cherishedbeginnings.com
http://www.doula-massage.com/
http://www.naturalbeginningsonline.com/doulas.html
http://www.professionaldoula.com/

Hi K.,

I haven't ever been in your shoes (I had my first daughter vaginally with no problems except that she had to be induced), but if I were, I would get a second opinion or just let your doctor know that you want to give the delivery a try. I am pretty against having a C-section just for convenience sake and I also don't feel like they could possibly know that the baby is too big until you give it a shot. During the final ultrasound for my baby, they thought she was over 8 lbs (3 weeks before delivery) and she was born at 7.5 lbs. I have heard numerous stories about the doctors guessing at the babies' weight through ultrasound and it being way off. It is tough around the holidays. My daughter was due Dec. 22nd and I was finally induced on Dec. 28th, so she could have come anytime, but I had a great doctor that didn't once try to push a C-section. Pray about it and see if you can get another opinion. I, too, would be leary of major surgery unless absolutely necessary.

Best of luck to you!

Hi, K.! I had both my kids C-section. Follow your insticts on this. You know you would never intentionally put your baby in harm's way; so, trust yourself. Your body, mind, and spirit know what's best for you and your baby.

I know it's not great advice, but study what you can about the situation, and just pray about it. You will know what's right. Best wishes, Hon, and I will be praying for you and your baby(ies). :)

K.,
First of all, congratulations! I gave birth to a healthy baby boy last Decmeber 29th by a planned c-section. I can tell you from my experiences (I have given birth to both of my sons by planned c-section) that I did not experience ANY issues with recovery from my c-sections. I think that c-sections are often times much more difficult if you push for several hours and then have to do an emergency c-section. Here is my 2 cents on the issue - I can certainly understand your hesitation to have a c-section, however I can assure you that your doctor has already planned his Christmas, New Years and tee times for the next 6 to 8 weeks - reality today is that he isn't coming to your birth unless he is on call or working that day. There are just as many complications that can occur with a vaginal delivery and if my OB told me that there was a risk, then by golly I would do whatever it took to bring my child into the world in the safest manner possible. It sounds to me like you don't really have faith in your OB which is quite unfortunate - I LOVE my OB - I know it is probably a little late to say this - but find an OB that you are comfortable with and can trust. For the women out there that think that you can't have a baby too big for you to deliver - I have seen it happen. My friend pushed for 5 hours - was swollen and sore before she was rushed to an emergency c-section and she had a TERRIBLE recovery. EVERYTHING HURT! I am a big believer in c-sections when they are necessary - They save lives and at the end of the day that is all that is really important. How your baby comes into this world - be it vaginally or by c doesn't matter once they are here - safe and sound. Good luck, God Bless and Merry Christmas! Let us know when you deliver your angel!

There is no way to know if a baby is too large to fit until the actually dilivery because your pelvis will actually spread during the labor, so I say, how the heck does he know. I know lots of women how hae delivered very large babies and been just fine.

I say you tell him, you want a trial of labor to see how things go, your body was made to have babies and if you have already had one, you should do great! YOu don't need unnecessary MAJOR surgery!

K.,
I understand how you feel. With my first pregnancy I felt very prodded along and although I wanted to deliver naturally my doctor intervened. They did all their "interventions" saying that I needed this and that, (and I had been praying through all of it that I would be able to deliver her naturally without any assistance) and then when I had finally had enough, the doctor began prepping for an episiotomy and extraction by forceps. She didn't even ask me if it was alright to cut me in such a delicate area. I had over heard her telling the nurse, so I told her rather forcefully not to touch me if she was going to try to cut me and that I could do this on my own. She insisted, saying that my baby couldn't fit and that it was best, so I insisted right back. And you know what? She came out in two more pushes just fine. No ripping, nothing. Doctors don't know everything. They're not super-human. They make mistakes all the time. Mistakes that can cause unneeded stress and tension.
If you have any worries, pray about them. Ask God to make everything work out so that it is most safe for you and your baby. Also, you are her mother. You know what is best. Before this doctor said anything to you about shoulder dystocia, you felt and knew that your baby was fine. Your body and her body are fine. Trust your gut and don't be led by fear. Your gut will tell you the truth without having to use fear. You know she's alright. God bless you both.
-F.

K.,

Your title caught my attention; then when I read your issue, I recognized your daughters' names! I wrote to you a week ago (when you needed some encouragement).

As one who has had both a completely natural, unmedicated birth and also a C-section, I personally would choose the natural birth again, even though it was a long, difficult labor. I am grateful for C-sections when needed, though - it can literally be a life saver for both mom and baby.

In your case, I would strongly encourage you to see another doctor for a second opinion. Any true professional supports that approach before having any kind of surgery, and your OB should do that, too. Your trust of his judgment is already in question; better to confirm your suspicions and switch, even now, than to go along with him and regret that choice later. There are many competent, supportive OB's - I hope you will find one and discover what is really at issue here - a true shoulder displacement or the doc's desire to control his schedule. And if you find he is wrong, I strongly encourage you to report him to the medical board (after you have the baby, of course. No need to stress yourself out at this point).

Best wishes! I'm glad you had a L&D nurse to talk with at church!

I do not have any knowledge or experience with C sections but this is exactly the reason I chose to go with a midwife rather than a Dr. Dr's like to go on their schedule...midwives go on the baby's schedule. I delivered my first baby vaginally with a midwife in a hospital. I was in labor 28 hrs and she ended up having to break my water for me but she was vey very patient and I only had to push for 19 minutes...had I gone with a Dr, I'm sure I would have ended up undergoing an uncecessary C-section.
If I were in your shoes, I would insist to my Dr that I prefer to try vaginally and only to resort to C section in the event of an emergency.

get a second opinion
my i suggest dr cummings in denton
the as the most natural child birth friendly doc
good luck

I have not had a c-section, but I have heard that it is often safer for mother and baby to have one. Supposedly the recovery time is easier, too....but again, I have not had one. I just know that after the vaginal deliveries that I have had, I have walked around like a penguin for awhile, whereas friends of mine that had c-sections were walking around like normal, appearing to have far less discomfort. If you're concerned about the scarring, you might discuss that with your doctor and see what they can do for you in that area.

K.,
I had my first daughter vaginally and my second daughter by c-section due to the fact that she was looking "up" and her forehead got stuck on my hip bone. Granted, I think your doctor is full of it (since he's not psychic) to say that your baby is going to have shoulder dystocia, but please don't be overly concerned about a c-section! Mine was not planned and happened after about 12 hours of labor and the doctor's trying to manually move her over, so to speak. I didn't feel like the recovery was all that bad. Yes, it hurt, but for me it wasn't painful enough that I had to take pain meds for it. Anyway, good luck with whatever decision you choose. Please don't be bullied into having a c-section. If giving birth to your baby doesn't fit into your doctor's schedule, you need to find someone else who's not so selfish. Just my opinion. I wish you the best of luck with your new baby; congratulations!!

~H.~

Hi K.,

I know that you must be really scared and torn. Every mother wants to do what is best for their child, and I can totally understand that. I wanted to share with you my experience and tell you that I don't believe you will run into shoulder dystocia with an 8lb baby.

I was told with my son in 2002 that I had cepholopelvic distortion, i.e. my son was to big for the hole. So, I was given a c-section, and my son due to complications from the section spent 1 week in the NICU. It was horrible. So, when I was pregnant with my next daughter I wanted a natural birth, but my doc said I needed to be induced early to keep her "small". The induction failed and I was told to have another c-section, and once again, that I was too small to deliver a bigger (8lb 10oz) baby girl. I did the section, although I never felt it was necessary, but I felt forced because of the nagging doubt that he might be right, and what did I know? When I got pregnant with my third daughter, I thought I am not having a section. I also had a side effect from the section of ectopic pregnancy and that cost me my left tube and ovary. So, I really believed I could do it. I got a care provider who believed it as well, and a doula (Delilah Ray who was amazing and really helped me when I was scared) who held my hand the entire pregnancy. I had an amazing birth, and guess what my little angel was 9lbs 8oz, I did not tear, and there wasn't one moment of dystocia! It was a beautiful vaginal delivery, and one of the best days of my life.

I just want to say that a well trained provider can handle dystocia. It does happen, but I don't believe it is a reason to have a section. That is just my two cents.

K., I wish you a wonderful delivery, and whatever choice you make I hope you will feel comfortable. I just wanted to share my experience, and tell you why I think your gut instinct is right on the money. :-) Hugs to you, and I will say a prayer for you too.

I had c-sections with all 3 of my children and there were no complications,and with my daughter I was awake through the whole procedure.After it was over I went to sleep cause I knew my baby was alright to my knowledge you know what I mean.I think the best thing is for you to sit down with family and your doctor and really talk about it.

Definitely refuse the C-section! Is the shoulder concern due to the size estimate of the baby? My Dr tried to get me to do the same with my third child. Said he was huge - I had about 5-6 ultrasounds at the end. He was my smallest baby at 7 pounds, 4oz! They said he was 11-13lb!
I think your gut is telling you the right thing to do. Good luck!

Chin up! You are doing the right thing by reaching out and getting feedback. I agree with one of the other posters in trying to get a second opinion if you can. Other than that do your research. Research the shoulder thing and use that info with your respond postings and pray. One thing I have learned is to trust your gut, intuition.
I had toxemia with my first child. My doctor said he would probably have to do a c-section (70%). Well that left me 30% in birthing vaginally. What a respected is that he let me try a vaginal birth being monitored constantly by the nurse. Turns out Cole was ready and he came on out with no complications. It shocked my OB/GYN.
My second child came while I was in triage in the L&D at the hospital. No complications. He was diagnosed with Down Syndrome the next day.
I guess what I am really getting at is youneed to take all the responses and research and find a quiet place and meditate or pray ( I don't know if you are a woman of faith).
Listen to you inner voice and follow it. You can always try to have a vaginal birth and i it is not working and the baby goes into distress, you have a c-section. The CS is longer to recover from but if you have a support system in place you will do fine. Try to round up friends and family to help when you need it. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
God Bless and I will keep you in my prayers. Sierra will come when she is ready and you will do just fine. Trust yourself.

I had a scheduled c-section because my body would not dilate past 3 cm. It was very simple, quick, and safer for my daughter. The whole surgery took under 11 minutes and I was home from the hospital on the 3rd day. Recovery was a breeze as well. I only have one child, so I'm sure my recovery time was a bit longer than with vaginal births, but there were no complications and I don't remember it being painful unless I laughed really hard : )
I think if your doctor recommends a c-section, there is a medical reason. I'm sure it's not because of the holidays. Just search your heart and pray on it. You'll find the answer. If you'd like to talk to me, feel free to email with any questions at all! I'd be more than happy to answer them!

B.
____@____.com
www.themomteam.com/bleboeuf
"Helping Moms Work From Home!"

I didn't realize shoulder dystocia could be predetermined. I've always read that it can not be determined before you have the baby. I would definitely get a second opinion.

Also I've had 3 C-sections and I've recovered from all of them. Sometime to weigh in your decision is that a c-section is a lot easier than an emergency c-section. I had it with my first, and it scares you to death. With the 2nd and 3rd I already knew what to expect.

Good luck with your decision.

C.

Hi K.. I have a daughter who was born through c-section. Being that it was my first delivery I paniced like crazy but it really wasn't that bad. I had already had my epideral thinking we were going to deliver vaginally. But things change and I was rushed into a c-section. Believe me, I was terrified!!! But all was well, just a couple of days of recovering that I could've done without. Good luck!

Let's see hmmm? A doctor makes $10,000 off a vaginal delivery and $25,000 off a c-section, of course he's gonna tell you to do a c-section. If you had a vaginal delivery before, you can have a vaginal delivery now. I can't believe he tried to scare you w/ shoulder dystocia, that is ridiculous! Have the baby natural!

I had a C-section and it was a picnic, seriously. I was sore, but no big deal. It was so much better than labor. I had trouble sitting up and was very tender. My tape, etc. pulled me forward somewhat, it was tight, but once the tape came off, no problem. I felt tremendously better after two weeks and after four weeks was ready to start my daily mile walk with the dog. I would do another C-section, no hesitation.

I am an older mom who was planning on natural delivery with midwife and ended up having emergency C section at last minute. My son's head was stuck in bad position.
Having a healthy baby is the most important thing and I can tell you from experience - if the head or shoulder are stuck,it is not a good for you or baby. Have a heart to heart with your OB if you are still on the fence and get all your questions answered- maybe even get a repeat sonogram. I would take your OB recommendation and ask your family for help after the birth. C sections take a little more time for recovery, but in my case everything turned out OK. Good Luck!

I agree with a lot of the other women - get a second opinion. The lady at your church and your family may mean well, but they are not doctors and haven't seen the same medical tests that your OB has. They've giving opinions based on the heart (and what you want to hear), not what might be best for you and the baby.

That being said - yes, a lot of OBs are scapel-happy and won't hesitate to do a C-section. Yours might be one of them, or he may be giving you your best option. Since a C-section IS surgery, I would get a second (or even third) opinion. If you have 3 OBs who tell you a C-section is necessary, then don't tempt fate. But if the other 2 see no reason that you can't deliver vaginally, then you know your current OB doesn't have your best interests at heart.

Is it possible for you to get a second opinion? I would hate to think that your physician is doing this to keep his holiday schedule, especially since he has to have someone on call for days he is out. Where are you delivering?

My advice is to ask another physician for their opinion. Whether it's someone else in the doctor's practice or elsewhere, it is better to hear it out from someone who has seen you and given you an exam. The reality is that people can give you advice based on their own experiences, but they can't give you advice based on your situation unless they examine you.

Ultimately you have to do what is best for the baby. Good luck--I know this is a tough decision. Please get a second or even third opinion until you are comfortable with the decision you make.

Best wishes!

You've had a lot of wonderful chime-ins on this subject, so I don't know whether my advice will help or not, but here's the stats: Shoulder Dystocia: Although the definition is imprecise, it occurs in approximately 1% of vaginal births. Everything I came across said it is nearly impossible to predetermine if a baby will be in danger of this unless the baby is HUGE and/or there have been previous complications with delivery. Since your first daughter was born without any complications, I would suggest delivering vaginally again. When my second daughter was born, she shot out like spring and I was up within minutes of her delivery - no meds, no stitches, no chemicals. Good luck!

I have two boys and they were both delivered by C-Section. My first was a C-Section after 23 hrs of labor. I was more than happy to have surgery at that point and it probably should have happened earlier in the day than it did. My second was after 5 hrs of intense labor and they were afraid there was an oxygen problem. Both were to help the boys (who are now 24 and 10). I had no trouble and didn't think it was that bad. I need to mention also that my husband was not here for the first child and I only had help from my parents the first two days I was home. I know there is a push to have the baby vaginally, but when it comes to the safety of the child, a C-Section is not really a big deal. There is some recovery, but you are so busy feeding and caring for the baby that you hardly remember it.

Good day K.,

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

Every woman has a story to PROUDLY tell about the day they gave birth!!!!

I agree if you are able, get a second option from a low rate C-section facility. Evaluate the information you receive, do as much research as you possibly can on emergency situations during delivery in general (this is not the only situation to be prepared for). You can do this if nothing else, but to ease your mind in having a C-section, whether emergency or planned.

REMEMBER, talk to your husband about this I am sure he has an option, no matter how insignificant it maybe. He will go through this with you, don’t leave him out. If an emergency should arise you both need to be prepared, it may be him that make a GOOD judgment call. My sometimes too reserved husband was a tremendous help, we went through the entire process together.

I was blessed to have a very skilled doctor, he handled both my situation without panicking; or mentioning C-section. I had both my daughters naturally, I insisted. My first girl was 8lb 10oz head so darn big I ripped and she ended up having to be suctioned out. It was painful; however, I would take the stitches over that shot anytime. My second daughter, who measured 9lb 5oz, was a story of a different kind. While at the hospital in labor; she pooped in the sack, and had to come out immediately (and this is what reminds me of your situation). The doctor instructed me that (1) he would make an incision due to the large weight of the baby; and (2) once her head (and head only) came out; he wanted her to be cleaned off before she began to breath. This was to prevent her from digesting or getting any of the feces in her eyes, nose, and mouth. I stop pushing and while the rest of her body remained inside they cleaned head her off. While still fully dilated, the rest of her 8lb 9oz body came out.

Thankfully both my 8 pounders were just fine! Due to their weight the biggest problem my doctor felt during natural birth was if I did not fully dilate. As I understand it....if everything is going fine during labor; and the baby's head is able to successfully pass through the birth canal with no complications; the rest of the body would make it. If you do not dilate enough for that I don’t care how big or small the baby is you will have to have an emergency (because it is a wasn’t a scheduled/planned) C-section.

What I am saying is…..your doctor should be ready for all possibilities. Now that he is aware of the situation he can plan accordingly if YOU and your husband plan to go through with natural birth.

I pray everything goes WONDERFULLY for you and your family!!

T.

Dear K.,

It was my birthday, turning 41 on Feb 18, 2007 when I delivered my first baby by C-section. It was my choice. I over analyze everything and I did more than extensive research on delivery. Yes to deliver naturally is well to some women the only way - but then these women turn around and use formula instead of trying to breast feed. I don't get it - anyway, if I had to lend some guidance here, you need to trust your doctor. Today a C-section is the safest way for the baby to enter this world. I work in med malpractice law and have seen some of the results of having to forceps and suction cups to remove the baby from the mother because the mother was too stupid to allow a C-section - I did not want that risk at all. I was up and about 6 hours after my C-section and only on pain meds for the first day. I also breast fed my baby for 6 1/2 months. Good luck to you and I hope you choose what's safe for your baby. I had an epideral and it was wonderful to be awake to welcome him into the world.

I am planning on another child and I will have a C-section for that delivery as well. Don't be scared.

clh

K.,
I have had 2 c-sections, the first one wasn't planned and it was a little painful, but I've heard that from everyone that has had a pregency induced. The 2nd c that was planned, was so easy, I had a spinal versus an epidural and would recommend that to everyone. I actually told my husband if I didn't have to go through the 9 mths of pregenancy and could just deliver this easy again--I would have 10 more, LOL. They gave me vicadin ( I have no idea if that is spelled right) for the pain, and I breast fed. I didn't get the allowed refill or even finish the bottle. Don't worry. Good luck

You've gotten some great advice!

I just wanted to chime in with a "don't fear the section if that's what you end up with!" :) They're not awesomely fun and you won't be jogging down the halls afterwards, but none of my three were terrible at all. In fact, I enjoyed the extra few days of room service and babysitting I had in the hospital. :)

In all seriousness, don't let the OB push you into a c-section. We were made to push out babies, been doin' it for eons. Thank goodness for modern medicine because so often it's necessary, but you should definitely be able to have a trial of labor.

Moreover, if you tend to be a bit of a pushover, you may want to find a different OB because this one may not be too keen to help you out during a long labor. If he's already pushing you towards a c-section he won't be much better if you're slow to progress. You may also want to look at hiring a doula, as someone else suggested. They're WONDERFUL from what I've heard!

K.,
I had a planned c-section due to the fact that my son was breech. It was not the way I wanted things to happen and I am not advocating it, but in case that is the way you have to go I just wanted you to know...it was not as bad as I expected it to be. The recovery was a little difficult but sometimes that is the case with vaginal births too. From what I have heard, a planned c-section is definitley better than an emergency one (everyone is calmer and less stressed). I know this doesn't help with your decision but it may help calm your nerves. Please feel free to PM me with more questions if you want. God Bless.

You are the only one that can make that decision, but let me tell you my horror story. About 4-5 yrs ago I was diagnosed with having a 15lb cyst on my overy. Every dr I went to told me that i was just irregular but I was fine. 1 dr sent me to get a sonogram. A few days later I was being scheduled for a cyst removal, a 15lb basketball was removed and my left overy. I had an incision from my panty line,past my belly button to mid tummy. Recovery was hard, I had to wear a stretchy brace for a few months and breath into a little contaption to make sure my lungs were stong enough I guess. So when I was pregnate and they wanted to do a C-sec since my baby was almost 9lbs, I was hesitant. But went foward with it. Needless to say that was a breeze compared to my previous surgery. She went along my panty line. I can't feel it, my other scare is thicker and can be felt from outside my shirt.I was ub and walking that night and gone in 2 days. She wants me to have another c-sec, I am disapointed that I will never know the feeling of labor,(not planning any more after #2) but at the same time I am able to extend my time from work by 2 weeks that is the plus side of another c-section.
That is my story. Good luck with yours.

GET A SECOND MEDICAL OPINION. Here's a good midwife:

http://houstonbirthcenter.com/

I'm Mel if Jackie asks who referenced you.

Don't worry about c-sections. I had 2 by choice, my girl 4 years ago and a boy 10 months ago. My girl was a little hard but that's because they induced my labor and tried to make me have her vaginally. I took about 1 1/2 weeks to heal up nice. But the pain pills work really good. 1 pill for 5 hours of being pain free! My boy was so easy I couldn't tell I had a c-section. I was up and walking the next day. It all depends on your body and how well you alrerady take care of yourself. If it makes a difference I had my kids at st. davids hospital and they were just wonderful! Don't be worried if you opt for a c-section Nowadays they are so routine you don't have to worry.

You poor thing!!! Ok I hope this helps.. I have had 2 C-sections because of big babies. My first C-Section (9/2002)my doctor told me we should plan for a "C" but if you want to try for a vaginal delivery I will support your decesion. After 15 hours of labor I ended up with a C-Section.... and delivery of my daughter who was 9lbs 9oz and 23in for 2 days I was exhausted from the labor and the trauma of the surgery but the pain was not that bad from the C-section. Ok 2nd C-section was planned from the get go.. (6/2007) We agreed to take the baby 2 weeks early because of her size It was so easy!!! I went in at 5:30AM by 7:52 AM I had my 2nd daughter she was 8lbs 12oz and 19in. On top of the C-section I had a cyst removed, a hernia repair and a Tummy tuck all at the same time. I was up walking (with lots of help) that night. I have never had a vaginal delivery to compare with a c-section but given the choice I would never have one at this point. The major down fall of c-section is that I will never have the experience of holding my baby right after birth. I would go with the advice of the doctor... Yes you are right C-sections are major surgery but sometimes are the safest option for the baby. I have had girlfriends who have vaginally delivered big babies and had major post deliver problems. I hope this helps please let me know if you need another info.

I delivered 2 sets of twins by planned C Section and it was so easy. The last ones arrived early sat morning and by tues I was refusing the pain meds, except they told me they would not remove the staples unless I took my pain pill. I went home on Tues and had no problems. It does change your appearance because it cuts muscle across your abdomen. No visible sign of the scar; they carefully put it in your bikini line; but just a difference in ab muscles after the cut.

I am 37 and had a scheduled c-section 16 years ago (as of tomorrow, actually). I had the same concerns but it went so well and I have no complaints. The hardest part was not being as aware after the birth to enjoy the new baby right away and there was some pain before the meds were delivered. After seeing my sister go through labor and the stress on her and her babies, I am glad that I had a c-section. My son came out perfectly and my recovery was seamless. I got out of bed the day after and started walking around the halls to get things working again. The scar is not about two inches and barely visible. This procedure is so common and is so stress free for you and the baby. It will take you longer to recover but in the end, it's really worth it. Your baby will be fine and so will you. Just remember to get up as soon as possible. Also - stop worrying and have faith in your doctor. You'll be upset with yourself that you spent so much time being anxious over this rather than being happy and looking forward to your baby's arrival. I know that from experience. I was so happy when I brought him home I didn't care how I had him.

By the way - my son is 6'2 and 210 pounds, an advanced placement honor student in the top 5% of his class and started on the varsity football team his sophomore year as defensive end. He turned out just fine as will your baby.

Good luck with Sierra and make sure you have plenty of help when you get home. You'll need your rest to heal and to spend time with your beautiful baby.

Signed -

Mom to Alex - who gets his drivers license tomorrow!

This response may come too late, but I wanted to add that from what I've read experiencing labor is always healthy for the baby. If a C-section is necessary, maybe it could be planned around the baby's schedule - rather than in advance. I don't know if that's possible from a doctor's perspective, but it might be worth discussing.

I had my 1st born natually but had to push for 45 min which was a lot and very stressful. My 2nd born I had a lot of complications throughout my pregnancy due to the stress of being separated from my husband. I was hospitalized due to hypertension and went into labor and had a epederal and tried pushing but his heartrate went sky high so they had to do a emergency c-section which he was fine because they were able to get out fast enough and had a perfect little head and was perfect all over. It was well worth it. Good Luck on whatever you decide.

God Bless
M.

Hi K.:

I was 34, seriously diabetic with a few other health issues and my doctor thought it safer to have a c-section with my sugar being so high - even though my diet was the best ever and I was on insulin.

It was a breeze. Of course childbirth has pain regardless how you give birth and yes it takes a little longer to get over. You wouldn't want to try sprinting but within 2 weeks I was at the mall with my new baby. The carpel tunnel I had while pregnant and up to 3 months after, bothered me more than the c-section. I also had a bulging disc from the pregnancy and that took 2 months to get back in place - it was much more painful! They kept the epidural in my back for 2 days after delivery lessening the amount each day and it helped with the pain - some, but I was able to get up and walk, breastfeed my baby and I kept her in my room rather than the nursery. They did have to keep her in the nursery the first 12 hours because her sugar was high, but she was perfect! My scar is very minor and though the c-section was planned, it wasn't planned for another month.

My only disappointment - no tummy tuck. I kept asking my dr. to suck out any fat and pull TIGHT - but he didn't, said that was another procedure.

Oh yeah, my daughter was born Dec. 29th (went into labor at 36 weeks) and I had the on call dr. deliver, the on call anethesiologist, neo-natal specialist, nurses and janitor. Everyone was the back up crew. Even the peditrician was the on call dr. She was born at Presby. Dallas and things still went well in spite of everything.

Wishing you the best and don't fret.

Merrry Christmas,

T.

Hi K.. I can completely understand your fears and confusion. I had a C-section last spring. I did have some complications as I developed a small hematoma as a result of the surgery. However, I could have gotten the same thing if I had had foot surgery, or back surgery or any kind of surgery so that is really a complication risk that ANY surgery will entail. I did not have any issues with recovery. In fact I have a 2 story house with my room and the nursery upstairs and was completely freaking out that I wasn't going to be able to climb the stairs for 4 weeks because someone told me that. Completely untrue. I was climbing the stairs the day I came home with NO problems. I guess I would take a look at what you feel inside will be the best option for you. I have a friend that was induced and she pushed and pushed and the baby just wouldn't come out so then they decided to do the c-section. Maybe your doctor could schedule an induction with the possibility of a C-Section. I guess my advice would be to listen to your gut and research the situation with the baby and do what makes YOU (not your family) most comfortable. Hopefully this helped a little... take care.

Maybe consider the weight of your first child, head circumference, chest measurments. Since you are already dilated would your dr consider inducing this week? Giving you a better chance at a vaginal birth? I have had friends whose children were emergency C's due to pushing for 2-3 hrs and having the same issues you are worried about. Then had friends whose doc's opted for forcepts or vacuums. These situations are not the best for Mom or baby. But maybe a delivery by the weeks end would allow for a vaginal.

I agree seek another opinion - quickly to help increase your chances of a vaginal birth if it is safe.

Good luck!

I know you have gotten a lot or responses. Get a second opinon, the rate of doctors doing C-Sections in this area is very high. Of course all of us just care that our baby is healthy, but women's body's are made to deliver vaginally. I would highly consider getting a Doula. I had a C-section and although I recovered fast, it was a major surgery that could of been avoided had I had a Doula.

I had to do a little research on Dystocia shoulder. I, also forwarded this to my sister who has had all 3 girls delivered by C-section. Maybe she can relieve your fears on this.
Tell him you don't want to schedule a C-section, you'd like to wait till you went into labor. Then you may see his true intentions from how he answers.
This is a serious enough subject to get a second opinion, if you have doubts of his compitence. Find another doctor. If you've had ultra sounds, take them with you.

I would question the advice of a nurse who contradicts a doctors advice. Has she seen the ultrasounds??

K.,

Does he have proof of anything from the ultrasounds? Where is his concern coming from? Question him, take your husband or a friend with you but before you do write down every last question you can think to ask him about this. I labored with my son for about 22 hours and almost lost him when it came to the delivery so they had to take him by c-section. For fear of that my other three were taken that way also. The recovery was rough but I'm still here and my babies are too. Good luck with this, I will keep you all in my prayers.

Okay so here's my perspective having been forced into a C section I didn't want and there wasn't really any proof that I needed. My daughter was 9 lbs 5 ounces. So yes she was on the larger side, but much larger babies have been born vaginally. To make a long story short the whole process was very traumatic and the day that was supposed to be happiest in my life was the worst. I do not reccomend a c section unless PROVEN necissary. You've already had one child vaginally, and they say that second children are always bigger. So I don't understand you're doctors issues, other than they make more money doing C sections than natural births, and he's lazy. The other issue is that babies that don't go through the labor process, are born with PTSD. And then they're wired for life to be stressed out. I've had that theory for a long time and I guess they're just now startig to publish all the findings on it. My advice to you is to TRY, they can't stop you from trying. And you'll know if that baby is too big, they won't descend into the birth canal, or you're labor will slow. There are all kinds of signs. In the end it's up to you, and it's a hard decision. But let me tell you something no one ever told me. If you do take/ end up having a C section make sure you get a gurtle. That way you won't end up with as much of an "apron" belly (where your stomach hangs over.) No one told me that and now I feel like I'm disfigured. And you won't feel like you're kicking your guts around like a soccer ball. I hope everything works out for you. And damn doctors like that to hell. Using scare tactics and fear to usher mothers decision. I think we should line them all up and do something to them, what I don't know yet. But I"m sure I'll come up with somethng.

Hi K.,
I must say that I have not had a c section but my sis in law had to have an emergency one for her son due to toxemia. She recovered just fine with no complications...I'm sure she was quite sore, as after any surgery, but she said she wasn't miserable and she was a single mom and was still able to care for her newborn...she did have some help though.
I had a vaginal delivery with my son 2 years ago and he was only 6lbs 9oz. The delivery was uncomplicated besides some tearing that needed stitches...it took me 8 weeks to totally heal. Now I had my daughter 3 months ago and she was an unexpected 8lbs and I am not a big person! The delivery was fine, besides an episiotomy, which was healed in about 4 weeks.
All I am trying to say is that every delivery is different and you just don't know what will happen. If your doc is concerned about baby's size, then maybe you should ask about being induced early to have a better chance of natural birth? Being induced doesn't sound fun either, but better than surgery?
Good luck to you and just remember, no matter what you choose, you will be in a hospital with qualified staff to take care of you and baby. They devliver babies every day and if complications do arrise, the doctors will know what to do to keep you both safe.

PLEASE do NOT let your doctor talk you into a c-section. He is DEFINITELY doing it to work his schedule. "If it were him"??? Really?!@?!?! Since when has HE had a baby?! A similar thing happened to my mom with my brother (who is now 19) she wasnt forced to do a c-section, but the doctor induced her on christmas eve because he was going on vacation. Absolutely absurd! Your baby is going to be fine and you even had a WOMAN labor and delivery nurse tell you so. Your family seems to support the vaginal birth as well, so take their advice. Doctors make me so mad sometimes. All they care about is THEIR time and their convenience.

I haven't read all of the responses so far but ultimately it is your decision and you need to make one that is the most comfortable for you.

I had my first son via emergency c-section and my 2 babies after him vaginally and there is a HUGE difference in recovery and delivery.

I guess I would ask why does your doctor fear you might encounter Shoulder Dystocia with this delivery when you didn't before?

Ultrasound estimates of size and weight are not always accurate.

My first son was supposed to be 10 or 11 lbs and he was 9.1
My second son was supposed to be 8 and he was 9.4
My daughter was supposed to be 7 and she was 9

Before you make your ultimate decision I think you should research the risks involved in a c-section for infant and child and research risk of Shoulder Dystocia and compare the two (you might have already done this).

It isn't an easy decision for anyone to make. Stay strong and Good Luck.
J.

Get a second opinion. If I were you I would refuse the Csection since he made it an option to you. If it was really serious than he would have told you that a Csection was not an option. Just trust in the hospital where you will be delivering and everything will be fine

If you're Dr. is suggesting the C-section simply because of the babies size then absolutely refuse it!!! He's more concerned with his schedule then your body.

I had a c-section with my son and only because he was breech. It scared me a little at first but now I wouldn't have it any other way. I just found out I'm pregnant with our second child and I'm sure I'll just go c-section again even though my doctor said it's up to me. The recovery really isn't that bad and I can barely see my scar. Do what is best for you and your baby.

I am not in the medical field, but I have had 3 boys...one induced a week late, one who came 2 weeks early on his own (also my biggest baby), and my last was a scheduled c-section because he was breech. It turned out that the cord was tied in a complete knot upon delivery so it was a blessing that I didn't have to go through labor and then end up in a c-section anyway. But..after delivering both ways I would totally try to do a vaginal birth again if I ever had another. The recovery is much easier-especially when you have one or two other children you are having to keep up with. I definitely wasn't up and around 6 hours after surgery (at least not easily), but everyone has a different story and different type of recovery. I didn't have any complications, but when trying to breastfeed and keep up with a toddler, etc. I stayed sore for much much longer than I ever would have thought. Don't get me wrong. I was taking my son to MDO and toting the baby along the week after I had a c-section and life went back to normal out of necessity, but it was harder than a vaginal birth. If you can do vaginal and you get a doctor willing to try I would say try, but as soon as they say a c-section is the better option, don't hesitate. Like I said it was a blessing to have my c-section so nothing was wrong with my baby, but if I could have done it vaginally or at least tried I would have just to avoid some recovery time and get to hold him immediately in my arms instead of giving him a kiss and then looking on from a distance. I think when people haven't experienced a vaginal birth they just don't know any different so it is fine, but I missed that with my 3rd. We totally bonded, he was my best breastfeeder, etc. so don't worry about that. Hang in there...go with your gut...and trust a 2nd opinion if it gives you some comfort. Overall, either way you choose you'll have a beautiful baby soon and the way he came into the world won't matter!

Sounds like you know the answer and possibly the motive of your doctor. I wish you could trust him, but it sounds like you do not. Go with what it seems you have already decided and what is best for your baby. God gives mothers an amazing ability to know how to protect her children. We have to just be still and quiet to listen. :) I pray it goes okay! P.S. I had a c section because I had twins and had to do it that way, but I would have definitely gone the other way if I could. It is just natural and better, but sometimes we can't. Recovery is hard, but doable.

K.,

I would recommend the vaginal delivery. I have had two c-sections and the recovery for me was painful. Unless the baby is in trouble I think viginal is the way to go. If you tear during giving birth it is still a much faster healing time. My sister who is very petite had a vaginal birth with here 10 lbs baby boy and she did tear and recovered smoothly. Where as it was hard for me to carry my 7lbs 8oz because any movement was painful. Laughing hurts too. I highly recommend the vaginal birth.

K.,

I am going to answer this quick as i am short on time, so sorry if i repeat things other answers have already said. a c-section is not big deal, really. Especially if it is planned, (mine was not). It is much less painful, and the scar is really no big deal, mine is hardly noticalbe at all. When i had mine the worst part of all was the 2 days in the hospital afterwards because I was so drugged to not feel the pain. i was worried of being able to care for my daughter because i was told i would not even be able to get up and down on my own until my cut healed, no problems for me, i was up and going before they even let me go home, and had no problems moving around and caring for my baby. If the Dr. is reccommending it you really need to take it into consideration, because if you decide to deliver vaginally and have complications and have to do an emergency c-section this will not go near as smooth as the planned one. hope this helps.
K..

I did not have the concern of Dystocia, however I have delivered two children by c-section because they were both over 10 lbs. That was over 10 years ago and I have never had any problems. I am sure the technology is much better today than when I had the surgery. I would have liked to have the option of natural delivery, unfortunately it wasn't for me.

I am a 27 yr old mother of 2 boys 8 and 3. My first son was born vaginally but was delivered with shoulder dystocia...very scarey! He wasn't breathing when he was first delivered and could have had more complications but ended up ok, thank God. My second son was a big boy and my doctor insisted on a c-section delivery because of a previous shoulder dystocia. Best decision ever because he was 10lbs 7oz. Shoulder dystocia is very life threatening for your baby. It is a doctor worst nightmare in delivery. My advice would be to do the c-section. These doctors know what they are talking about. If your baby does have shoulder dystocia and they get stuck in the birth canal, your baby could have problems or worse pass on. Very dangerous! C-sections do have a longer recovery but it really isn't as bad as you may think. Trust your doctor. God Bless!

My doctor recommended the C-Section and I went through with it, and I do not regret it at all. I had to do what was best for my baby and for me, you cannot worry about what your family/friends say. The C-Section was a walk in the park, I was up in walking in no time and out of the hospital very quickly. For me I worried myself to death about whether or not I could deliver her vaginally or not, it took a lot of my chest just deciding to go ahead with the C-Section. I do not think your doctor is recommending this do to your schedule (think of how many others he would have to "convince" besides you to have a C-Section in order to not ruin his holiday, I am sure he has a bunch of pregnant patients due around the same time. I would like to think he is requesting it for your and your child's safety. Do what feels right for you and your baby. Remember no matter how he/she gets here she will be here soon and it will not matter how she/he got here, and long as it was safe.

I had 2 c-sections. The first was an emergency with my oldest and then I just scheduled the 2nd b/c it was the easiest thing to do. I for one would do what the dr says is best and safest for my child. I was fine after each. There is a little pain, but if you have someone who can help with Mali for about a week or so, you should be fine. It's the 'no-lifting' that is hard ~ esp with a 20 month old. My oldest was only 17 months when my youngest was born! I do have a pretty high pain tolerance, but I think you will be fine. If you don't feel comfortable, I would talk to him some more and make sure you understand the reasons. I wouldn't think he was putting his holiday plans above you & your child's safety!
Good luck!

Hi K.,

I have had 2 C-sections and have 2 perfect, beautiful girls. The recovery time is a little longer because it is surgery, but it's not that bad. I didn't care how my babies got here as long as they were safe and healthy. They are. I find that there are people that are VERY opinionated on this issue (vaginal vs. C-section)which is odd since I think each case has to be judged individually. If you trust your doctor and he has given good advice all along, then I would go with his advise over the family's and the lady at church. Did this doctor deliver your first baby? If so, and you were happy with him then, then he is probably trying to what is best for you and your new baby.

A.

Hi! I had an emergency C-Section after I was induced and in labor for a few hours. I had no complications afterwards. I was up the next morning and moving around normally the day after that! The C-Section was scary when they told me I needed it right away or the baby could suffer severe concequences. It was over so quickly and the baby is great! I hope this is helpful in your decision, Good luck!

Hey K.--I understand your hesitation. I had to have a c-section with my first when labor went over 19 hours and was not progressing. With my first c-section I had a bad experience as the pain I experienced afterwards was not managed well. So with my second I was determined to deliver vaginally, until three weeks before my due date when I was told it might not be a great idea since my previous incision could rupture. So I reluctantly decided to have c-section #2. I was told prior to c-section that my baby would be approximately 7 pounds at birth (my first one was a 7 lbs. 3 oz), and when the doc pulled her out she was actually 9 lbs. 11 oz. and she confirmed that I would not have been able to deliver vaginally. If your baby is too large, the shoulder issues can complicate things and end up harming the baby.

I can't recommend what to do because only you know your doctor and his motivations, but carefully consider the size of your baby and whether or not your frame could allow for the birth of a baby of that size (and be prepared for her to be bigger!). Also, if you do decide on c-section, I would recommend the following as my recovery the second time around went very smoothly.

1. No Staples!! Insist on stitching--it heals faster and you do not have to have the staples removed two days post delivery when you are in incredible pain, and ripping out the staples will only cause more pain.

2. Get something stronger than Tylenol for the pain--I think I had demerol, and something called N-100 (I think), and it made the pain bareable. I took it every 6 hours whether I needed it or not for the first week, and after that the pain is minimal.

3. Get up and move around...if you stay still you will get horribly constipated and feel like your incision will burst--not fun.

4. Get someone to stay with you the first two weeks as you will not be able to do much with/for your other child. If you over do it, you will hurt yourself and set back your recovery. Be prepared for full recovery to take the entire 6 week period.

Hope this helps! It is not as scary as it sounds.

S.

OK - me again.

If you do not have a clear medical emergeant reason to have major abdominal surgery than don't.

A low-risk mother with low-risk infant who have C-section vs vaginal births have twice the maternal death rate and three times the infant death rate.
Your baby will be more likely to need breathing resuscitation.
Your baby will be more likely to spend time away from you in the NICU which also increases his chances of hospital-based infections.
Your baby will be more likely to end up formula fed than bottle fed which increases his risk of allergies, asthma, leukemia, diabetes, etc, etc.
You will have an even harder time with even more pushy (and stupid) doctors with your next pregnancy.
You will be more likely to suffer post partum depression.
You will not be able to get up to go to the bathroom by yourself without help. Or laugh. Or cough.

If at all possible - avoid a C-section.
If at all possible - find a health care practitioner who actually WANTS you to avoid a C-section.

I detailed how in my other post so won't go into that again here.

Oh - I'll add one - get a doula! Tell her you don't want drugs and don't want a C-section and she will bust her butt to help you.
www.bellywomen.net is a great place to find inexpensive or even free doulas.

A. <><

My honest opinion as a nurse myself is that no reasonable and prudent nurse would make that recommendation without first seeing the sonogram and looking at your previous and current medical history. I cant tell you which way to go but I would get a second opinion from another OBGyn or talk to your doctor about his concerns and the complications involved. But PLEASE for you and your babies sake, dont get opinions from people that dont have all the data and information in front of them. I am sure your church member has a lot of experience but EVERY baby and mommy and pregnancy is different and some L&D nurses are very passionate about their views on how deliveries should go. I am so sorry that you have to be in such a challenging at such a physically and emotionally tiring time. Just ask yourself, what is the most likely way I will have a healthy baby safe in my arms and go with it!

I will pray that God gives you clarity and peace about this situation!

R.

Hi K.! Congrats on both your babies. Did you seriously get 62 responses on this? WOW!! I, too, am 28 and I have a 16 month old and 5 week old. I delivered both by C-sect. The first not by choice, but the second by choice. C-sections are done everyday and are considered just as safe as a vaginal delivery. I won't lie and say I wasn't scared, but I won't say that I wouldn't have been as scared to deliver vaginally as well. Never let anyone other than your husband make your decision for you. What's good for one may not be for another. The recovery time is a little longer for a c-section, but just to let you know the day after I came home from the hospital my mom had me cleaning the house and doing laundry. So, it's not impossible to take care of your oldest. I was just told not to lift her!! It could mess with the healing and open your wound. At the end of my pregnancy i questioned everything my doc did and was so mad at him, but when it was all over everything made sense, but follow your instincts. You'll be the one that has to make the decision as to what is right for you. Not anyone else. Good luck.

K.,
I have had 3 c-sections and since I don't know anything else then I say it's not too big of a deal, but it is major surgery. You mentioned that you talked to a lady in church - since you do go to church why don't you pray about it and see what God guides you to do? You could also get a second opinion. I don't know anything about shoulder dystocia - it sounds like the dr. thinks the baby's shoulder might get displaced? Anyway, pray about it, do some research, get a second opinion, and see where God leads you.

Dear K.,

Kudos to you for choosing to think for yourself about your Dr.'s advice.

I do not have any personal experience with a c-section, so I can not answer what that will be like.

I delivered a 9lb 1oz baby with no issues, he was my second. My third was only 6lb 15oz but needed vacuum assist to 'come out quickly' because his heart rate had dropped. After his head was "out" his shoulders were suck, but the Dr. kept pulling on him and felt the 'pop' of his collar bone break. He was uncomfortable for the first 36 hours and seemed fussier than a regular newborn, but he healed completely and it was never an issue. Also, my first baby was 6lbs 9oz, so I went from a six pounder to a nine pounder without any issues!

I would encourage you to read the literature on shoulder dystocia, from the search I did this afternoon it seems very hard to predict when this will occur. Many, many 'large' babies are successfully born without any complications.

I would say if possible get a second opinion, although I know at times that is easier said than done. Have you considered inducing labor this week to address the size issue of the baby?

I don't know if you plan to labor without drugs or not, but if you are able to avoid the epidural then you have more options for positions when delivering. Ina May Gaskin is a midwife who has delivered thousands of babies and has written a book called "Guide to natural Childbirth". In it she explains a move she introduced and the medical community later named after her called the "Gaskin maneuver". Basically this involves moving the laboring mom to a "hands and knees" position (sorta like a dog) if a baby gets stuck. She maintains that in the 'hands and knees' position the maternal pelvis is at its greatest width and this allows for the baby to come through or be repositioned if necessary. You can read an article about it here: http://www.inamay.com/gaskin_maneuver.php

Best of luck to you and your baby!!

Warmly,
J.

PS I am a "tiny" gal who would wear a size 2 in jeans except that my big butt makes me wear a 4. I have very narrow hips and I got my 9lb baby out just fine. I was also with a girl friend to gave birth to a baby who was just a tick shy of 9lbs and my friend wears a size 0 and is not even 5feet tall. Both of us delivered these "big" boys as our SECOND babies, and I really do think it makes a tremendous difference.