I'm Looking for Advice About My Kids Sleep Routines

Updated on May 31, 2007
J.R. asks from Los Angeles, CA
6 answers

Hi my name is J. and I have 4 beautiful kids. My oldest son is 9yrs, my other son is 4yrs, my daughter 3, and my youngest son is a 1yr. I have a problem with their sleep routine. The 3 youngest sleep on bunk beds. The 2 littlest ones sleep in the big bed a full and the 4yr old sleeps on the top by himself when the oldest isn't here. I can't seem to get them to sleep without me being there. Sometimes since my husband works mid shift I want to spend time with him but I can't because I have to stay with the kids until they fall asleep, and then sometimes I end up falling asleep too. Please if anyone has any advice or ideas on how to get my kids to stay alone it would be really appreciated.

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So What Happened?

I just wanted to thank everyone for their advice. My kids bedtime routine is getting a lot better. At least I don't get up in the middle of the night as often as I used too. I try to give them a bath before bedtime and I also have read to them and apparently it is getting better. Well thanks again to everyone who replied.

More Answers

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J.Y.

answers from Stockton on

Hi, J., my name is J., I have 2 boys ages 8 & 5 1/2. Well honey the only way to solve this sleeping arrangement is tough love. My youngest always towards the middle of the night end up in our bed, so what we did was kept our bed room door shut. He was scared of the dark, so we ended up keeping the hall or bath room lights on with their bed room door open. They are still very young,so if you nip it in the butt now at this age, it should be fine. The children have each other to sleep with & there fore they should feel comforted. You must be strong, I know they are your little babies, but mom & dad need each other & grown up quality time as well. I hope I helped some. Let me know how it goes!

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H.M.

answers from Honolulu on

First of all Congratulations for being a mother to four children I know it's hard sometimes, I have three boys 11 years,4 years, and 1 year old I also live in Aiea and I too was having trouble with putting them asleep so I started giving them a bath usally around the same time then we read a story, sometimes it works but if not I had to sepeerate them ...and that works!!! But they love story time!!!Just be strong and CONSISTANT~~~Consistancy is the key!!! Good-Luck, H.

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V.T.

answers from Fresno on

Hi J.,

I had the same problem with my daughter, and I did the WRONG thing. I layed with her until she could go to sleep. Bad move on my part, now she still has trouble sleeping and she's 17!!! What I should have done was get tough and let her cry it out. Everytime she gets up, just silently turn her around and walk her back to bed. Try your best (I know it's really hard) not to show her any emotion. Just like it's a fact of life. Kids need to learn how to put themselves to sleep. Also they need to know that you mean business. It will be VERY hard at first as they are not used to it. It will try your patience but believe me, it will be worth it in the long run.

Good Luck!
V.

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A.M.

answers from Stockton on

I have the same sort of problem.My husband works till 10pm.He always complains that I fall asleep with the kids,when were suppose to spend time.I started to feed the kids early,give them a good lenghth bath and turn the tv on in the bedroom so they can watch.They fall asleep within 5-10 minutes.

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S.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I am in the same boat... I have a three year old, a two year old and a one year old... they too sleep in bunk beds. I haven't figured out a permanent fix yet but I did come up with a cheater way. It is not the healthiest thing but I needed the break! I put a TV-VCR in the kids room and I put on their fav. movie and give them their milk. They stay in bed to watch the movie (a new one is always good)and they end up falling asleep. Then I can lay in my own bed for a change.

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C.N.

answers from San Luis Obispo on

Dear J.,

The one year old needs to be put to bed before the 3 and 4 year old - Can you make a small bed for him like a crib? with sides ? You need to have a way to separate him from the other's sleeping pattern because he has different needs. After you get him settled, - he may cry and cry and cry - but let him. Then, you spend time with the 3 and 4 year old. Read books to them as a big part of the going-to-sleep-all-by-yourself new routine. Explain to them that you and Dad need to spend time together and this is that time. You cannot lay down with them ANYMORE !!! This is the time for all Mothers to take a stand and do not give in. Dad's tend to keep their hurt feelings to themselves, but they do have them. This is enough neglecting your life with him. Be strong, do it. You know how, be brave, they are only little kids and they need to do what little kids do, and that is go to bed earlier than parents. Hola!! Go for it! You can do it! Sincerely, C. N.

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