I'm at a Complete Loss... Please Help Me!

My Grandson suddenly became afraid of the vacuum cleaner and the hair dryer at around that age-are you able to cover them with something sheer for the time being? Just until he works through this.

Did you ever hear the saying two steps forward, O. step back? He's coming back to you for a feeling of safety then he'll take another independent stride forward.
He will go through these phases of independence, weird fears, etc......totally normal.

You're not doing anything wrong, and neither is your baby.
This really is quite normal at this age. Little kids can hum along just fine and then all the sudden be clingy and seem afraid of getting too far away from mommy.
It won't last forever. Just be comforting and reassuring. Everything you're already doing.
He's not being demanding, he's going through a normal phase. You have to remember that this is a big world for little ones to get figured out.
Some might not agree with me, but I think it's perfectly okay for kids to cry. I mean, if they are clean, not hungry, nothing is hurting them....it's a way of expressing themselves. They don't have the words to explain things. We don't like our babies crying, but it doesn't mean we are doing something wrong if they do. Some babies cry being held, rocked, walked.....sometimes they just want to cry. It's okay.
My mom always said that a crying baby is a healthy baby. It's good for their lungs. It's hard on a moms ears (and heart), but a baby never crying isn't a good thing either.

Hang in there!
Your little guy will be fine. Love him through this, you'll make it.

Best wishes.

This is very normal development. He was not aware of so many things around him before, because he was busy learning how to walk run, talk, eat. Now that he has mastered these, he is looking further than himself. This can be frightening,.

Also if things have come easily to him, he may be afraid of trying new things, because they take some independent effort. You are the one that taught him how to walk, eat, , but you cannot teach him how to feel in these new situations. The unknown.

He and you cannot control other children. He and you cannot always control the fire alarm.

Maybe you can give him a heads uo for changes. We are going to story time at the library. You can sit on the floor, you can sit in a little chair or you can sit by my feet. (or whatever you want to offer as a choice).

We are going to the park. Do you want to take 2 buckets and 2 shovels so you can share in the sand box? Be share to take turns with that little girl. You can trade places with that little boy.

That tumble mat looks like fun. See how the children are smiling? Those children are laughing, I wonder what they are learning?

Try to give him words about what he seems to be thinking or noticing. Let him know you will be close by, while giving him a (very) few options. You do not want to overwhelm him. It may take a few visits to any activity till he feels comfortable. this is not a failure or a time to just give up, you need to follow what his needs are.

And Yes, he will grow out of this.

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It's normal. Give him love and keep talking to him. His brain is changing, his awareness of the world is expanding and he needs more reassurance. I read somewhere that every new development an infant/toddler achieves basically changes their brain and their entire view of the world and it's a HUGE change. Imagine if you only saw in black & white, then one day color showed up. It would be a positive change, but holy cow on the overwhelming side. That's kind of what happens for them - they learn a new concept and the world changes, but it's happening every few weeks!

Try not to explain there's no problem, but tell him how they work and why. I think that knowledge is power, even for the little ones. Basic knowledge anyway. He'll adjust, it'll just take some time.

He is completely healthy! It is a phase and these new experiences are simply adjustments...Give him lots of love and encouragement. He will warm up and become more confident as time goes on.

This is a normal phase - separation anxiety, sudden fears of things, etc - all normal phases.

Always comfort and try to be understanding - because if you don't, what do you think that does to your child's trust and psyche?

My daughter recently went through this - at 4 years old! Let me tell you, I felt like the worse mother alive. My daughter would cry all day until my husband got home from work, then she'd be glued to him till bedtime when she'd cry because she didn't want to be alone.

I can tell you that IT WILL PASS!! You just have to be patient and understanding until it does. Good news for you is that he's your only child right now, so you really can give him all the attention he needs. BUT I wouldn't recommend 'holding' him all day, just being near. Like, if you need to be in the kitchen, let him play with some measuring cups and stuff while he's there with you, not on TOP of you (lol), but so he can see you're still there. Eventually he'll realize that he's safe and you're not going anywhere.

Hang in there mama!! You are NOT doing anything wrong :o)

we moms just have to do a little more in situations. coming from experienced of a child that was somewhat tramatized and then the lightening, thunder, flush of the toliet, vaccum, car wash all became overwhelming. I guess it was a matter of time to grow out of these paticular issues. My child too was and still is independant and do most things on her own. She was a great example of a first born. With the age of your child and the needs that he needs I say you should be with him and give him complete assurance. If that means to hold him or nurish him or encourage him on a hour to hour basis, he needs that . 13mths is not that old. He obviously needs a lot of comfort right now. My thought was I had to avoid a lot of things my child was afraid of. She has taken a long time growing out of things. I would continue to do gymboree, socialize him, and help him along the way.

Sounds like separation anxiety to me, although it is a bit early but since he is so independent perhaps he is advanced in everything. All this new stuff is perhaps a bit scary for him if it has been just you and him and some close family up to now. Have you had play groups with just a few kids that he knows? Perhaps he would prefer smaller social events before heading into the great big world. My daughter has a trait that will always be with her and that is she is ultra sensitive and she would pause to make sure everything was safe before joining in. This usually meant hanging near or on me until the birthday party was almost over, or until the reading hour was over. We were never able to go to crowded or noisy events like fire works or street fairs. But you would know if this was a trait since birth, and it sounds like your son is going though a phase to me. To see if it is a trait, check if your library has this book: http://www.amazon.com/Highly-Sensitive-Child-Children-Ove... by Elaine Aaron. I used it as my guide for my first child who was ultra sensitive from birth and could not stand tags in clothes or bright lights or loud noises or strong tastes, etc. Just love him and let him be your "baby" again - you won't believe how fast tme goes and he will be in school all day.

It's sounds like your son has separation anxiety...he was probably somewhat traumatized (strong word but the best I can come up with) by the alarms going off.

Your son NEEDS YOU. He needs to know that you are there to protect him. Find a mommy's group near you - with kids the same age - your child needs to have socialization. If you can afford it - put him in a day care PART TIME - we did this with my social butterfly of a son (now almost 11 and STILL a social butterfly) because I was doing play dates 4 days a week and was EXHAUSTED!!! He got the interaction he needed at Kindercare for 4 hours, 3 days a week. It was a God-send for me - I got to do grocery shopping, clean the house, take a nap, get a pedicure - I had time to my self - which EVERY mother needs!!

I personally wouldn't let him cry - I would comfort him and reassure him that he is safe.

Have him evaluated for Sensory Processing Disorder/Auditory Processing Disorder by a pediatric occupational therapist who is SIPT certified, and specilaizes in primitive reflexes like Spinal Galant. There are a few great ones on Tampa area that I know of. Let me know if you need help to find the best! He will not grow out of this, he will grow into it. Also, being an early walker he didn't have time to fully integrate his reflexes and senses, fully. He will need help to do so and lesson the chances that these things lead to learning disabilites later on even though he is probably smart as a whip. These children become disconnected from their bodies, senses and emotions. I work with them so I know they can be helped quickly but the earlier you start, the better and don't let anyone talk you out of it by saying things to make you feel better.

Hi, you should comfort him. My son went through something similar. When he started going to pre-school and they had their first fire drill. The alarm was REALLY LOUD!! It scared him tremendously. After that he had an issue with loud noises. I was referred to an auditory specialist (not sure of the real title) to check his ears. Check with your doctor just to be on the safe side and in the mean time hold him, cuddle him. He must be really terrified and you're his only hope. He needs to be reassured, it'll pass as soon as he feels safe. My son is fine now.

Good luck. =)

I'm no expert but my opinion is love him, hug him and talk him through this!! You are not doing anything wrong as a mom - please don't be sad. Your son is so young and imagine it from his point of view - the world IS a scary place. I really believe that if you love your kids through the scary stuff it makes them more confident and assured. Other than time outs which are when my daughter is being naughty (and they only last 2 or 3 minutes) I have never abandoned my daughter and left her to cry it out if she was scared or sad. You should be your son's constant source of love. When he is a little older you can explain to him more clearly why the loud things are not scary, but for now just hug him and love him and you will get through this. It is a phase - this too shall pass :)

Does he have his 1 year molars? My daughter had a c-r-a-z-y week when she was getting her 2 year molars---and since there had been such a long break in between her 1 and 2 year molars it didn't occur to me that she was teething. And unfortunately it can be tough to know until afterwards. I felt so bad when the doc said at her check up, oh, she has all 4 2 year molars. I had no idea!

Of course, it could also certainly be the typical separation anxiety. Just give it a few more days or a week and he will probably even out. Hang in there1

We use YokaReeder.com- good to see this for now and future.

Also take a look and see if he has sugar in his diet- kids, and heck everyone is more sensitive if sugar is in thier diet- it disturbs nerves.
best, k

You've already gotten some great answers here, so I won't go on and on, but thought I'd just agree with many who say it's very normal at this age for kids to beging to suffer from separation anxiety. He's walking and discovering that there's a world out there other than mom, but he needs to be reassured that mom is still there. It's normal and it will pass. It may linger for a while at different degrees, but it will eventually get better. Other than this issue, sounds like you're doing everything right! Just remember, soon he'll be a teenager and want nothing to do with you! Best wishes...

Most likely, it is normal separation anxiety....I would get his ears checked just in case he has an ear infection though. My daughter is 14 months, and was acting like that for over a month around 12-13 months. I thought she was just teething, but it turned out she had a double ear infection! Just a day or 2 after getting on antibiotics, she was doing MUCH better, and was her old self again.

I just want to agree with everyone--it sounds like a phase and I would love him and be there for him, but not make a huge fuss over it. I wouldn't say anything about it, even to say you won't leave--because that introduces teh idea that you MIGHT leave. He's probably not even thinking that way yet.

And if it's frustrating you a lot to be a security blanket, think about a nice baby carrier--like an ergo or mei tai that you can do a back carry if you really need to get stuff done.

I'm finding that being steady and reliable is a huge part of the mom job as they grow--they'll run off and be independent, then run back and be clingy over and over again until they're grown. They count on us to be consistent!

in my opionon let him cry dont holdhim but tell him it will be ok and its temporary or get him a blankie