Did my 3-year-old notice? LOL.
PMS to the extreme, I had to go through the motions today. If it were up to me, I would have crawled into a box and slept. But no can do with a 3-year-old!
Anyway, a non-preschool day we headed to the park where she played with two other kids. Then home for lunch/quiet time, only she decided not to nap (secretly knowing I needed to pass out!)
OK, better keep moving and keep her occupied.
Off to our community garden where I spent the whole time trying to keep her on OUR plot, though toiling the soil relieved some stress. Then off to the vegetable store and she forgets her stuffed cat in the coconuts and we had to return. Back to a park, and she has to go potty and there isn't one!
Daddy walks through the door and I nearly thru myself at his feet.
But, I felt like I wasn't my usual self, and felt guilty for not being as talkative and more irritated than usual, only she really didn't do anything wrong.
I tried to act as normal as possible and hope she didn't pick up on it too much.
How do I stop the guilt?
No O. can be "on" and " engaging" 365/24/7.
That's just not realistic.
We all have good and bad days.
Forgive yourself.
Kids are very forgiving creatures. :)
Forget the guilt and go to the doctor to get your thyroid checked. If you are getting at least 7 hours of sleep a night, something is WRONG that you are so tired during the day.
Why do you think it's wrong for your child to notice that you aren't feeling well? Don't you want your child to know you aren't super woman? Stop worrying about keeping her occupied every moment of the day, and take care of yourself some! You need some TLC and Calgon Take Me Away time!! (After you make sure you don't have a medical problem!)
We are humans. We have off, irritated, tired, zombie like days. It's not like this this is who you ARE. Stop thinking you have the be the "on" mom all the time. None of us can be that. In fact, I think it's REALLY important that children see our struggles as a mom, wife, friend, etc. They watch US to see how to deal with life. You weren't feeling well and you got through the day unscathed. It wasn't a big deal, and you dealt. You showed your daughter how to get through those dragging days. Mission accomplished. Give yourself a break, mom!!!
You do NOT have to on all the time. You do NOT have to be perfect. You are NOT letting her down, by being human and having an off day. Put that on repeat.
Everybody alive at the end of the day? Yep. Job is done. (male logic)
Everybody has their "off" days. Sounds like you did quite well on yours, even though you weren't 100% feeling well. Give yourself a break.
Just know that this is part of being a mom!!! I feel that way sometimes, too, but remember that I can't always be 100% on the go, playing with my kids. And it's OKAY for them to learn, play, grow on their own sometime. Do not have guilt about your day - you did a lot for being so tired!!!! It's not like you were home and let her watch cartoons all day (trust me, I have had to do this before...even though it seems like days when I NEED couch time/sleep, my kids do not want to watch cartoons! LOL).
I am pregnant with my third and yesterday was having a lot of pressure/pain in my pelvic area. As soon as I got home from work, I put my feet up and laid on the couch. Kids were playing happily in the basement (dad was home with them) and I didn't even tell them I was home for a good 10-15 minutes. Then we went outside and my daughter wanted me to run around in the yard with her - instead I told her our deck was our Pirate Ship and I was the Pirate Mommy who needed to stay on board and ensure no other pirates came aboard! I would send them out to the 'sea' (grass) to find swords (sticks so dad didn't run over them with the mower) and then have them bring me treasures (rocks, flowers, etc) for our pirate stew! We used our 'pirate' voices and they loved playing and I got to rest while doing it!!! I didn't allow myself to feel bad because I was still interacting/being with them!!
You are good mom for being worried. Sounds like you are doing a great job!
