I Need Help with Twins Sleeping at Night!!!

Updated on May 29, 2008
R.J. asks from Daytona Beach, FL
10 answers

My twin boys are 2 weeks old and having a hard time sleeping at night. Wesley started this by not going to sleep unless someone was holding him. So my mom would stay up with him and hold him all night long. The other twin, Brian was fine. Then Brian caught on to the trick and started the trend. They sleep wonderfully during the day. They only wake up to eat and then go right back to sleep. My mom thinks maybe they have their nights and days mixed up. How do I get them to figure out their nights and days? When my mom leaves I don't know what I will do. My husband works during the day and can't stay up all night with them. I'm a school teacher out on maternity leave so I am trying to do all that I can without having to make him get up. HELP ME!!!!

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K.R.

answers from Jacksonville on

When my son was born he was the same way. I have to say I feel for you becauz i dont know how i would have done it with 2, but what I did was keep him up all day.. no naps no nothing.. and when it come to night time he passed out and he has been fine ever since.

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S.R.

answers from Orlando on

It sounds like your mom is correct. My twins were the same way at first. They slept more durring the day than at night. The only way to break this cycle is to keep them up for longer and longer intervals during the day. One of the main ways my Pediatrician told us to do this is to not bundle them up when we want them to stay awake. If they are in that tight warm wrap that we all use, then they feel sleepy & lethargic. If you strip them down to a thin sleeper (onsey (SP?) then they are more apt to stay awake & not get the tired feeling as quickly. Stimulate them if you see them drifting off to soon, show them musical things or bright things. You are going to have to deal with some crying, but at least you will sleep at night.

We also had to hold them to put them to sleep, I am personaly OK with this, I mean they are just 2 weeks old & I loved the time holding them. But if you are not for this, then you have to just put them down & let them cry it out.

Good Luck & if you have any more questions or want a sympethetic ear, please feel free to email me.

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S.H.

answers from Orlando on

I have 3 1/2 month old twin boys- CONGRATULATIONS!! I know just what you are going trhough. My boys were also confused between days and nights when they first came home. So far everyone has given you good advice I just wanted to add to it. My pediatrician told me the way to help them understand day and night ( in addition to keeping it light during the day and dark at night with no stimulation, talking or rocking) was to make sure they ate every 2 hours during the day. My boys were sleeping so well during the day and then up all the time at night. So I would wake them up every 2 hours if they werent already awake and feed them. Then they went back to sleep. I think it helped although they never slep long periods of time at night either, but it balanced out a little better. Also as a side note for twins, make sure you feed them at the same time then they will be hungry and sleepy around the same time. It would (and still does)break my heart to wake up a soundly sleeping baby the other one wakes up but if not you will never get a break! Good luck to you the next few weeks are the hardest until you settle into a routine. I was actually a little happy (although very scared) when my help left because I was able to try to do things on my own and figure out how my life was going to be. Once you get used to it twins really arent all that hard! You are welcome to email me directly if you need any advice or want to talk! Good luck!!!

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J.M.

answers from Pensacola on

I have a 4 month old that has done that since he was born. Drs say he's "high needs". Nothing to do but what the baby needs. Try Googling "high needs newborns". Personally, I wouldn't do anything to try to change their behavior/sleep patterns yet. They are still so very young. It's hard to deal with when you are sleep deprived. My 4 month old is actually our 3rd boy. We have a 4.5 year old, almost 2 year old and our 4 month old. I am a stay at home mom. My husband and I decided that we would switch out nights for feedings. That way at least every other night we would get a full nights sleep. Another thing you could do is switch every other feeding. So you should be able to get a minimum of 4 hours of sleep before being woken. Since there are two, you really need to get your hubby to help out so he is used to helping before your mom leaves.
Best of luck!
Jen

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S.W.

answers from Orlando on

Congratulations on twins!!! First of all, let me say that I feel for you! My daughter is now 12 months old and is sleeping great, but those first few sleepless months were not so fun. I cannot imagine two at a time! But, I want to caution you to not expect too much from your little guys. They are still too young to be expected to be sleeping through the night and should be waking to nurse (or bottle feed) at least every three hours. When they wake, just keep lights off, voices down, etc. so they know it is nighttime. Trust me, they WILL eventually get it. Just give them some time. Maybe ask your mom to stay longer to help you out at night? I had a friend with twins hire a night nanny to help out, but I'm sure that is expensive. Hang in there! This time will pass!

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A.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

My son definitely had his nights and days mixed up, too. I did some research on it and found out that when you are pregnant the fetus tends to sleep during the day when your movements and sounds are lulling him to sleep and he will wake up at night when you are still and your muscles relax and thus give him more room to move. You probably remember waking up a lot at night when you were pregnant to them kicking and turning. To help my son "unmix" the two, I would keep the house bright during the day (open blinds, lights on), music or the TV on, and make sure that he spent sometime outside during the day. At night I would keep the TV volume low, play quietly with him, and turn down/off the lights. He got the hang of it in about a week. One thing to remember though is that newborns (especially if they are breastfed) will be waking up every 2 to 4 hours to eat regardless if it is day or night. However, I did find that doing what I suggested above helped him for when he did start sleeping longer.
I hope that this helps! Enjoy your maternity leave & summer break!

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J.J.

answers from Tallahassee on

Hi R.
When I carried my children home from the hospital, I gave them a nice warm bedtime bath, put them in warm jammies and wrapped them as they did at the hospital and put them down. I made sure they were not hungry and was cozy and warm. I rarely had a problem with them waking up. If I did I checked to make sure they were dry and clean and put them down again. Mom is not helping by holding them all night. When they are in the hospital they are wrapped to stay warm because of the A/C. May God bless you with a little peace and quiet.

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W.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

First of all - I raise glass to you and wish you well with your twins! As far as their sleep issues - I used a book called "BabyWise" with my daughter and it worked. You can stick to it to the letter or follow the basic idea of the book (which is what I did) and it works.
There is also another book I used with my daughter called "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by Kim West. That is a good one as well.
Consider taking a look at either book, and I wish you well!

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A.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

Bless your heart, twin boys. Unfortuntaley, your mom is right, their days and nigth are mixed up because before when you slept, your belly was still and relaxed and they could move around more. When you were walking around and talking it soothed them to sleep. They will adjust, but at this age, it is going to be a little while. Be prepared to be totally exhausted during these next few weeks. I would get a couple Miracle Blankets, not the generic ones or plaing blankets, these will last you at least 6 months and are totally dummy proof and baby can not wiggle out of them. Start trying to figure out their routine, do they sllep for four hours at 5pm until 9 or 10? Even though you don't want to keep that schedule, go with it...you are reinforcing their need to have a long sleep. And SLEEP when they sleep. Regardless, get your rest, you will feel better and will have a better milk supply which will in turn get them to drink more and sleep longer. Breastfed babies need more feeding too because the milk digests quicker, because it is easier on their tummies. It is good for them, but harder on mom. Eventually, when they have developed a good routine of a few short naps and one or two long ones, you can push them back. My DD would sleep from 5-10pm every night, after about a week of this, I gave her a bath to keep her up until 5:30, then in a week or so, I moved her to 6 pm, etc. At 15 months, she would sleep from 9am until 1 pm, I first wanted to wake her up, but instead I wwent with it, she wasn't cranky and we slowly moved the nap up by going outside or doing activites and now at 2 she sleeps from 11:30a until 2:45 pm. That is SO nice. During the night, when they wake, keep the lights down, place a soft cd..over and over, play it every time they are tired, this will help so much when they are a little older. Now I can play 30 seconds of our nightime CD ( Praise Baby) and my daughter is asleep, no matter where we are. Nurse the baby a little, and in the middle of the feeding when they are almost asleep, change the diaper ( since babies always pee when they eat, there is no sense in changing him before feeding), then when they are a little more awake, finish the feeding and let them fall asleep nursing. This way they learn to only wake when they need to eat, to go back to sleep after they have eaten and you will get a little more milk into them because of the interruption in the middle. To get them on the same schedule, try gently waking the other twin, when you are almost doen feeding the first one. Swaddle them and put them side by side in the same crib. They will appreciate each others company and the breathing will help them sleep better. You can always put them in cradle swings if you are having a hard time. Try pacifiers, too, it helps soothe and reduces SIDS risk. Please feel free to email me privately if you want to talk or call me. I have four kids and have cared for dozens of newborns for the last 20 years.

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C.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

The best advice i have is to have lights on , noise, etc, during the day, and then towards night time, lower all lights, make it quiet, and do the exact same routine every night. If you have one of those swaddle blankets, even though they might cry at first, babies seem to really like those, wrapped tightly around. also try a noise machine with white noise or a humidier turned on high to signal night time. to get our baby into the nightime routine, we gave her a bath everynight, without soap, to calm her and used the above techniques. she was sleeping through the night at 9 weeks. hope this helps.

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