Hello ladies...I am kindof in a slump and not really knowing which way to turn. I work from home and my son is always with me. My mom watches him for me when I am working. But my problem lies in the fact that I have no life and haven't had any kind of a life in over 2 1/2 years and if I want to go out sometimes I really can't because I feel guilty asking my mom to watch him again after she's had him all day. And she can't go on the road with my dad because I need her help while I work. My parents are against me putting him in daycare and I am not too keen on the idea either but I don't know what to do. I feel like I am putting my parents out by having them watch him for me while I work and again if I decide to go out with my friends. If I decide to put him in a daycare or have a nanny or have him go to a home daycare, I want him somewhere where he will be learning things, being taken care of, etc. I guess after all that, what I am wanting to know is if you know of anyone or if you know where I can start my search or if you have any suggestions as to what I should do. I do not have any help from his paternal side as his dad terminated his rights. So really it's just me, my son, and my mom and dad of which I am very grateful for and who have helped me tremendously. My son has never been kept by anyone else and I want to be sure that I can trust whoever I leave him with. This is extremely difficult for me and I really want someone who will treat and take care of him like I do and in the process can be teaching him things. Oh yeah, I don't really think I need this full time...I think maybe a few hours a day a couple of days a week...I don't know...I am exploring all avenues...I want what is best for both him and me.
First of all, thank all of you who responded back and for all the great ideas. I plan on looking into all the avenues suggested. I will look into a local mommy group as well as look into the church programs. My parents and I came up with a possible solution that works for all of us. On every other Saturday night my parents will have a "date" night with my son and I will have that night to chill out or do whatever I want to do. We might not be able to make those particular nights happen when they come around as they may be out of town but we will work around it. I am also going to try to find someone who will come here and babysit for me in case they can't be here if something is pressing that I have to do. Also I am finally getting out of the house more. My best friend and I started a date night with our kids where all of us will do something on every other Friday night. So I set it up where my son and I will go out together on one weekend and the next weekend I will go out on my own. I am also going to set up a date night for just me and him by ourselves. Getting us both out of the house and away from the work environment will be good for us both. I feel much better thanks to all of you and your support and of course my parents. They really are looking forward to "date" nights with their grandson.
Hi.There C. how are you doing today well i would try a mothers day out me my self i dont like day cares i dont think the childern get the love they need at daycares are try a small in home childcare good luck have a great day.
Or how about joining a local mommy group. Maybe networking with other moms will help and maybe you can take turns watching each others kids.
Another option is to find a home daycare. I had good luck with home daycare. I would suggest to make sure they are licensed and check their references. The good thing about home daycares is that there are not as many kids in a traditional daycare but they still get to experience some socializing as well as more personalized attention.
I worked part time outside the home when my son was younger than 18 mos and I loved the flexibility that home daycares gave me. (Plus they tend to be less expensive than traditional daycares.)
Good luck!
Hi C., I'm about to post my own request for nanny advice. I've got my three step sons coming to visit for varying weeks in the summer. I'm having trouble getting started on where to even look. But when I read your post I had an idea. I have a friend who is also a mom (she has two, ages 6 and 10) that I may ask to watch my sons, even if only for a few hours a day. I wonder if you and I could do some kind of co-op? Not sure if that's the right word but if you meet the lady i'm thinking of and want to use her then it would be more worthwhile for her. I know it's just a temporary solution but just a thought. I also work from home full time and don't know how I could possibly work while also watching kids so I'm going to start my own request now!
You can try a local pre-school program at a church. The one at my church starts at 18 months. These are not considered daycares, there is a schedule, teacher conferences, and I think are cleaner since most the kids have SAHM and are not there all day. The kids seem to have a really good time there and I think its 2-3 days a week, for 3-4 hours. I think its a great idea to put him in a program to learn to share, take turns, raise hands things like that.
If you parents enjoy watching him i honestly do not think that they will have a problem watching in on a evening so you can go have some down time. All you can do is ask. i've just recently had to move back in with my mom as well. and she is surprisingly good with my wanting/needing some down time. as far as the day care. maybe you can start small and have you mom take him too a moms day out 2 times a week. and go from there. i know paul ann has a great one as does glen meadows. i hope this is some what helpful
I agree with trying a mother's day out first. Just try it for a month or two and see how he does. Maybe if your parents were "off" 2-3 days a week you wouldn't feel guilty asking for babysitting at other times.
First of all, I understand. My parents are the only ones to keep our boys.
Where do you live?
I just had to say it is wonderful your parents are able to help you so much! I rarely even ask them to babysit-let alone watch them all day. They are busy with their own lives and like to relax. I can't blame them, they have raised their kids.
You should check your local churches. Many of them have Mother's Day Out programs. My son is in his second year at one. He goes Monday & Friday from 9:00-2:00. It's really great! Much cheaper than daycare if you only need it a few days a week.
Good Luck in your search!
