This evening, when my 16 year old son got home from track practice, he told me that he had been shot in the face. Apparently, when he was getting into his car, a pick-up driven by a local high school drop out drove by with another kid, one year younger than my son, and the younger boy shot an air soft gun at my son. It hit him in the eye-brow and left a pretty good bruise. Obviously, he's fine, however had it been an inch lower and hit him in the eye, I'm guessing it would have been much worse.
My son says he's pretty sure the school camera probably caught what happened and he will be going in to talk to the principal tomorrow morning and will call me if he needs me there.
In a situation like this, if your son wanted to handle it himself, would you let him? Or would you be on the phone making calls right away?
I don't think I would wait until school tomorrow. I would file a police report NOW!
The whole thing sounds awful. I'm glad he is okay.
Let the boy handle it.
It's clear we're in the minority - but I'm sticking with my "independent kids make independent adults" sisters. :)
I would be on the phone calling the cops. In my state three children were shot within the last 3 weeks in gun "accidents". Two of them are dead. This is not something to joke about, even if it wasn't a 'real' gun. 911!
I would have called the Cops.
AND take of photo... of your son with that injury.
Document, everything.
And hopefully there were witnesses?
The perpetrator.... was NOT a student of that school.
And it occurred after school hours.
Thus, call the Cops.
To M., this is a matter for the Cops.
NOT a school Principal.
Since he asking/planning on doing it on his own, I would let him. He is 16, and sounds like he pretty responsable and mature.
If it does not sounds like they take him serious... or attempt to blow him off, then I would be there in a flash
good luck
We view our sons as men at a younger age rather than older. If they want to handle difficult issues, we not only let them, we encourage them. It sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders. I can't imagine why you wouldn't let him handle this. If he needs backup, he knows where to find you.
For M., I would be right there with him in the office, but I would let him tell the principal what happened. Be there for moral support, but make sure they do something about the incident. Hope they arrest them! That is one dangerous game those boys are playing.
Odds are high the school will get you involved even if he went on his own. I would skip the extra steps and go in with him. Let him do all the initial talking and talk when you are inevitably addressed. Because he's a minor they will involve you whether you or your son want it.
he's 16? I would absolutely let him handle it as he wishes. The school, since it was on their property will make a final call on getting law enforcement involved. I would think twice about urging him to call the police, as a criminal record will not only follow a person forever, but will most likely guarantee that they will never work a decent job. I don't think I;d encourage my kid to put himself in potential danger by having someone arrested. If this was a ramdom act of supidity and not continuing harassment, I'd question if I wanted to make it into one by calling the authorities. If anyone should get the police involved, it should be the school for everyone's safety, especially your son's.
Moma, I hope you are taking him to the hospital. You really need to make sure he is okay. It's too close to his eye and brain for you not to have him checked.
I would also call the police and file a report. Bless him, he could have been blinded!
Dawn
call the cops......Dont wait bc the kids could still be out there and really hurt someone.
In many cases I would say let him handle it. However, this involved a shooting instrument. For M. that would mean immediate police report, photos and trip to the hospital to make sure he's ok given the delicate area he was shot in. The kid that did the "shooting" needs immediate discipline and it should be tough and no-nonsense. This kind of incident can't be taken lightly.
Wow...I seem to be in the minority here. But he's 16 years old. If you don't start letting him handle some things on his own now, when will you let him? If you constantly hover and handle things for him, how will he ever learn to do it? I feel like parents hover too much these days. Showing a little faith and giving him a little independence goes a long way. Have you taken a minute to think how it will affect him at school if his mommy goes marching into the principals office and worse yet calls the cops for him? Do you know what kind of ridicule and retaliation he might face? Obviously, I would be there to support him and offer guidance. And if the situation turned to more than this one incident and started to be some sort of harrassment, I would get involved. But for now, I think I would let him decide what to do. Good luck!
I think it's way awesome that he wants to handle it...I would be there for him...but I would let him do as much as he wants to on his own. It can be extremely empowering to handle these kind of things on ones own...whereas if you jump in with both feet, especially if you take the lead...he may never know if he could have done it on his own...or if he needed Mom. I don't think there's anything wrong with you helping him...I J. think the best way to help him may be supporting him and letting him know you're there for him, it makes you upset, and even letting him know how badly you want to jump in and fix it...but that you are really proud of how he is handling it. Anyway...none of my kids are that old yet...so...heaven knows what I would really do in your shoes...but those are my two cents!
Let him handle it. It sounds like he's got a good head on his shoulders.
I would go with him. That way the principal wont be inclined to J. brush him off.
At 16, I would let him go to the principal on his own initially, and then speak to the principal yourself afterward. He seems pretty mature to be going to the principal about this. Don't interfere. Let him prove he can handle it.
I am speaking from the perspective of having older teens, and knowing how much they don't want mom micromanaging everything.
I would let him handle it, but I would definitely offer guidance. Have you encouraged him to call the police? I think it would be important to file a police report and let the police handle getting the security tape, etc.
I am so glad he is okay!
Wow, what a wonderfully responsible young man you are raising. Good Job Mom!! Let him try handling it himself and if he doesn't get the response he needs, then show him you have his back by going to the school or possibly the police with him. I am very impressed he is handling this so maturely.
well, i'd let him handle it on his own but i would insist that his method of handling it involve calling the school right now as well as the police.
it sounds as if he's going to do J. fine. good for him! but stay on top of it.
khairete
S.
I tend to put all the answers I have read together as one. He is 16, yes, he should handle it, but it was a gun, therefore it brings you into the equation. i would agree that you need to be at the office- or possibly conference call with the principal. Least of all let the principal know what happened via phone, then see if your son steps up- or maybe he's afaid of retalliation. My son is much younger, if he brings M. a concern, regularly- playground stuff, then I do mention it to the teacher, so she can keep an eye open- not necessarily intervene. But watch. It's a tough call. Good luck to you.
I would be calling the cops.
I think it's great that he want's to handle it himself, but I'd be sure he knows that you will follow up with the school in a couple of days. So glad he was not seriously injured!
I would have made calls immediately if not sooner. I have a SIL that has a brother with one blind eye because a kid shot him in the eye. Broken arms and legs can be healed. Eyes can't be healed.
I'd call someone now, even if it is at midnight by the time you get this message.
Good luck to you and yours.
The police should be contacted. That should have been done ASAP! Any kind of gun on school property is illegal. Even if it is not capable of shooting bullets. The fact that it was actually shot at someone makes it an even more serious of an offense. Call the police.
Be sure to take pictures of his eyebrow ASAP, then press charges and call the principal to follow up or be there when your son talks to him. The violence will continue if not stopped. The boy will go from air guns to bullets.
How about this thought? Your son wants to handle it himself...but really he's not gonna do anything about it for fear of retaliation...really can't say I blame him in these times. But it could be the case.
Let him handle it and make sure you tell him how proud you are that he wants to handle it and is handling it!
If he feels he is able to handle it, and took the time to tell you how he is handling it you can be pretty confident that he will come to you if he needs your help.
I would be making phone calls.
I would let him handle it.
I am chiming in a bit late but I vote for a call to the police. He also needs to be seen by a doctor.
Yes the kids that shot him may retaliate but I would get it on a police record ASAP.
It's like bulling, domestic violence, or stalking -- document --document -- document. The more documentation you have the more power you have should this go to court.
How would you feel if they went after small children at a playground? Call the police.
I'd be on the phone with the police already! This wasn't a harmless prank. You even said it your self an INCH lower and your child could very well have gone blind! He could have been injured for life because of these boys... because of something so stupid! I'd have been on the phone with the police instantly. I wouldn't let him handle it.
id see what happens first.. idwait til he got home from school and ask him what did u tell the principal? what is he going to do about it? .. this is going to sound bad going behind his back but if u think hes lieing u could always call the school ask to talk to the principal and ask if your son went and talked to him if u really want.. i wouldnt give him any details though.. if your son didnt and u tell the principal wat happened he will call your son down to the office the next day and ask him whats going on.. wich in sure will get him thoroughly annoyed with u for calling.. in our school we used to have freshman friday at the beginning of the year.. it got inscreasingly worse every year but no1 told because they didnt want to make it worse on themselves... well eventually someone who got hit with a waterballoon filld with pee and bleach finally ratted and the year after i was a i graduated they sent cops to the school for the first 3 fridays of the year to make sure nothing happend.. but i can tell u the kid that told and got everyone in trouble.. people found out who he was and he definatley did not have an easy few weeks after that... u have to understand if your son doesnt want to do anything about it its not like he doesnt have a reason.. and thankfully he didnt get hurt... its hard to sit back and do nothing but hes the one that got hit its up to him
I would let him handle it but follow up on what is done about it. Sorry this happened!
