You know what? I totally get it.
You feel like you are broke. You feel like you are 'making do' and taking one for the team. Your husband asks you to account for expenses (or at least, this is your feeling) yet spent money on something unnecessary while knowing that things were tight. You went away and he 'surprised' you with something for... well, let's say 'kind of' both of you-- you wanted the hutch and he wanted the style.
I'd be p.o.ed too.
I understand asking each other about expenses. We are in a tight time right now and so, you know, so my husband and I do check in with each other about anything non-essential because it means "do we need to put it on the credit card so we don't overdraw our checking?" In this case, asking about spending is about Being a Responsible adult and working as a team to lessen the possible risks of racking up fees and overdraft charges.
I think you might tell him that you are ready to go talk to a counselor. I was married (once) to a man who was financially irresponsible and would buy 'me' gifts that were really for him, so I understand how you feel this *wasn't* truly for you. If he had said "hey, I'd really like to get this for you, what do you think?" it would have given you a chance to at least have a say about this and he took that away from you.
FWIW, I am married to someone now who would love for our house to be an antique museum. :) Love him dearly, but I had to really work with him to make him understand that furniture has to work for both of us. We both live here, with a young child,no less. We have similar tastes, but some of the things he'd just love to have I know are too delicate or not functional enough or just too much, period. I've had to learn to give a willing 'yes' or a firm 'no' without making it about our whole relationship, and without holding onto any resentment if I do say yes. That took some work on my part, to get to that point.
So, go talk to someone about improving the communication in your marriage. I'd live with the hutch for now, but let him know that you are very frustrated that he is not considering you an equal voice in the marriage, because this is what it sounds like to me. You have a right to your feelings-- listen, no one else here is living in YOUR marriage, in YOUR family with YOUR situation. Families on tight incomes DO check in with each other about spending. Like I said, it's about being responsible with the money, not about being each others keeper. I found that when my ex didn't check in with me regarding spending, boy, we had a lot of extra bank charges to pay. Not smart.