We own a small home in another state. We previously lived there but moved due to our daughter's medical situation, and then moved again due to my husband's job.
It is rented. A realtor/property manager manages it for us.
The property manager is married to a very good friend of mine. They just got married (second time each) a couple of years ago.
We are extremely dissatisfied with the property manager, for professional reasons. We hope to be able to sell the house this summer.
I'm looking for advice as to how to tell my friend that we are going to fire her husband. I don't know whether to share our disappointments about him (they are only professional, not personal), or just to tell her that we'll discuss the professional things with him. How would I word this so that I don't lose the friendship?
Has anyone experienced anything similar? What would you have wanted to hear?
Thanks, everyone. Yes, we have given him specific warnings in writing. We have told him specifically what we wanted changed. It is now the 18th and he has not provided our end-of-year statement from 2015 so that I can do my taxes. He will not use a website, Facebook, or social media to advertise homes - he simply tells people and hopes that word of mouth will suffice. He doesn't have a fax machine.
I know not to mix business and friendship, but we knew him as a realtor and I knew my friend before they each discovered each other and got married. In hindsight we should have changed realtors then.
I appreciate the words of wisdom. Oh, and no, my friend is not his professional colleague or in the business in any way, other than just being his wife and doing small errands for him from time to time. I do value her friendship and hope to stay friends with her.
I think you could even say you want to continue you friendship and that you do not want the property to get in the way. We have decided to use a non friend to manage the property.
edit: if they push to keep the business you can give reason why you don't want to. They could be more relieved than you. They may find this business relationship just as difficult.
If it were me, I would communicate directly with property manager of what you'd like to see happen by this summer (better care, more service, etc.) so that you will be in best position to sell house. I would leave your friend out of it entirely.
If you worded it that way - that you hope to sell so really need to see x, y and z happen - could you just keep him until summer? It's not that far away, just a few months. I would have a brief conversation over phone with him, then follow up with points you want to see happen in an email so you have a copy of it. Then in a month or so, if he's totally sucking, you then touch base and say that he's not doing his part of agreement so it's time to part ways.
What I'm wondering is, have you given him warnings? I would think if you haven't and then fire him, you run the risk of losing the friendship. I think if you hope to keep it all, definitely do not tell your friend her husband's shortcomings. No way. Keep her out of it. If I were in her shoes, I would not want to be in that position.
Good luck :)
Deal directly with the property manager (even if its her husband) and take care of business. Do not involve your friend and be sure to speak with him in a professional manor.
If your friends mentions it, tell her that it was a business decision to let him go and hire someone else. There is no way to know for sure if it will hurt your relationship or not, but consider it a lesson learned (do not mix business with family or friends).
I prefer for people to be direct and honest with me even if it's not what I want to hear it.
You don't need to say anything other than this:
"Girlfriend, we've come to the decision that NOW is the right time for us to sell that old house of ours. The market is as good as it's going to get and we could use the money for other things." - and that's IT!
No complaints or discussions with anyone or any other reasons.
This is merely a financial decision based on what's best for your family.
No one can fault you for that!
Personally? I wouldn't tell my friend. I would have a BUSINESS CONVERSATION with my property manager and express my disappointment and that we will be selling the house in June.
Have you given him written expectations in the past?
Have you given him time to rectify the situation?
If you have not? then you need to. You need to give him a chance to fix the situation. If you have and he has failed to correct/rectify? you tell him - thank you for being our property manager. We are selling the house and will be putting it on the market on X date.
You keep it ENTIRELY business. You do NOT discuss the short coming with the friend. this is BUSINESS not personal.
I agree with Margie G.
Leave your friend out of it. It is not her profession or contract anyway, right?
Then to make it "less personal" with her husband I would as do as Margie suggested andgive him a list of your expectations, specifically professional and only about about the property.
If you can't have a "meeting of the minds" that you cannot enter into a contract.
But I do have to point out, if he is not worried about keeping his end of the contract already, then he may not care about the friendship as much as you do.
I hope not :-(.
I wouldn't cut him loose until you get your end-of-year statement. That's really important. As soon as you get it, send him the letter saying you will no longer need his services. And find someone else.
I'd just tell them you're going to sell this summer and want to have it for a few months so you can have it fixed up first. For this very reason, I am always against hiring someone I know on a personal level.
I think you should simply tell him you no longer need his services as of x date. I'd leave it at that. Pick a date for him to be fired and tell him he is no longer needed at that time. Give him two weeks notice...or longer. You don't even have to use the word fired. I'm sure he must know he is lacking as a property manager. If he wants to drag the reasons out of you, you can tell him you and your husband really like him personally but you did not like when x happened. Or when x happened. Or when x happened.
Do you have, or know of, a realtor in that area with whom you would list the property? I would contact a realtor and see if that person (or agency) knows of a short-term property manager you could use (ideally within the same firm - many realtors do provide this). In my experience, realtors are really well connected with home repair services, painters, septic pumping companies, landscapers, and so on. Get an appraisal of the property as well as recommendations on what you need to do to spruce it up to get it market-ready (tell them your budget, of course, and ask what the best use of that budget would be, to get you the most bang for the buck). Let the tenants know that someone will be coming in to assess the situation, and of course give them notice that you anticipate putting it on the market. Depending on when their lease is up, you can either have them leave, or go on a month-to-month lease until the property is sold, if they are willing/interested.
Then let your manager know that you no longer require his services as of X date (put it in a letter, return receipt/certified so it's signed for), and that you will be putting the home on the market. Let him know that you are consolidating short-term property management with a real estate company just for efficiency's sake - say "it's included" if you want to. Obviously his days of managing the property are numbered anyway, and this way you don't have to confront all the shortcomings. (Of course, if he asks for a reference for other people, don't do it!) Put in a brief paragraph reminding him that you are waiting for ABC paperwork, essential for doing your taxes, and that you will send him his final paycheck when everything is received. Make whatever arrangements are necessary to get the keys back, and let the tenants know whom they should call for repairs after the specific date. (And DO NOT send a check until you have everything you need. If you have to, get an extension on your taxes - it's a pain (especially if you are likely to get a refund), but it's legal and will buy you the time you need to get everything done.
You can still remain friends with the wife, and through her, the husband - for now it will be a long-distance relationship anyway because you live so far away. So you can have cheerful phone conversations and exchange newsy letters, and put this unsatisfactory business relationship behind you. If questioned, you can say how much you value the friendship, and now that they are married, it might have been better for BOTH sides if there were no professional relationship, but since you are selling the house anyway, the business association would have been ending anyway.
Very nice of you to value the friendship and want to keep it.
tough situation.
but if you're selling, how deeply do you want to go into it? i mean, for good or ill it will be resolved in a few months, right?
i'd certainly keep the professional relationship and the friendship separate. under no circumstances should you share your dissatisfaction with the husband's performance with your friend. well, unless she specifically and pointedly asks you, and then answer honestly but carefully and without any sort of a tone.
naturally it can't be tiptoed around. since you've provided written warnings (smart) and your very specific instructions have been ignored, simply send him whatever sort of termination paperwork is necessary, and mention to your friend 'a pity it didn't work out, but sometimes these things don't, do they? we really like arnold, but for this situation we're just not the right fit.'
good luck!
khairete
S.
If you're definitely firing him no matter what, and you definitely want to keep the friendship, say NOTHING about the professional complaints. "We're going with a different option, and it's nothing personal, we love you guys" and variations thereof.
Complaints are only useful if you need the person to change and think they might.
I agree with B 100%. Move forward with your plans and don’t air your grievances. Nothing good is going to come out of pointing out all of his shortcomings.
Hire a Realtor and have them manage the sale. Be done with it. Time to move on. If this friend was a real friend they'd have done what you wanted.
Geesh! Why in the world would you let someone like this try to sell your home.
It sounds like you need to plan a 2 week trip there to get the renters prepared to move out by sending a return receipt letter stating the house is going on the market and you need it vacated by XX-XX-2016.
When they're gone the renters are moved out there isn't any need for the friends to be involved, they won't be managing anything anymore. Get in there with the Realtor and get people hired to do the repairs and painting and cleaning and get it on the market.
Do expect it to go for much much much less than you think. Homes are so far down in price right now that I can buy a lake side vacation home in a resort city near large tourist style towns for less than $80K...2 floors, 4 bedrooms, handicapped access and it even has an elevator...seriously, they have it on the market for $70K something. They expect to have to come down in price too. They have it for sale and just need it gone.
I would take the time and go handle this myself. I'd let the renters know to move out, when they are gone I'd go and have the Realtor do the walk through, fix any broken things but DO NOT update it. Seriously, what makes you think that Realtor has good taste and what makes you think their ideas are really as current as they think?
I think that a clean tidy space is more appealing than a space that has ugly paint on the walls or paneling or gross carpet. Do take care of those things but women, we will always want clean neutral walls we don't have to think about painting before we can move in.
Off white, cool colors, not warm.
