So I have a aquintence (seen !VERY! rarely) that I would like to get to know better. She rides horses and I rode in my younger years. I would love to ride again. How would you word something that said hey, I like you and wanna get to you know you.
She acts a lot like I do, very laid back, and almost shy. I will admitt the more I look at myself the more I find that I am scared to do anything involving new/ not familiar people. At the same time though, I need more friends! She does not have kids that I know of so play dates are kinda out (and call me selfish but I want a friend that I can do me stuff with lol).
ETA- I see her tomorrow. Its the first meeting we have set up before arrands in town. We met in town actually just doing arrands. Now when we see eachother we chat and get along. No one goes out of their way to talk though. Also I have seen her around other friends and we are social.
You are all life savers. I have my friends from high school and ones that we just took off with but this is so different.
As for asking about problems that I have... I showed for 9 years and she is completely different riding than I am. I was drilled for form, knowing all I could about them, how to train, you get it. However I will NEVER claim to be a master. She trail rides and does more leisure riding.
Down here we'd call her a western rider and you would be a classic rider.
Can't you just be honest with her and tell her you want to take up riding again after so many years and since she is the only person you know who rides, would she like to come with you because you'd feel more comfortable the first time out to ride with someone familiar with horses?
Hi Susie
I hope that this email finds you well. We are busy here, as always, but everyone is great and we are looking forward to spring.
I have been thinking about getting back into riding and was hoping you might have some time next week to chat about where you ride and maybe recommendations for refresher lessons. Can we get together for a cup of coffee?
Thanks!
If she responds and says yes, then go out for a cup of coffee and make arrangements to go riding pretty soon after. If she's busy, then there's your answer as well!
Notes are formal and probably intimidating. How often do you see her or communicate? Go from there - keep it casual. Do you know where to ride? Maybe just call and tell her that you miss riding. Ask her where she rides, etc.
How about you ask her if you can tag along on a ride with her. Let her know that you have the interest and would need a little coaching but that you'd like to ride again and would like someone to go with. Start there. It's a common bond.
Address it verbally. The quickest way to get someone to like you is to be venerable. To be interested in something they KNOW about. For a geek, ask about technology. For an artist, ask about color. For a bibliophile, ask to borrow a good book. People naturally like to help other people in something they understand.
Ask her about a problem with riding or horses or something you are not as knowledgeable about. Ask her to show you.
You are on the right track for a great friendship, pun intended!
Invite her for coffee.
Ask about her horses.
Offer to help muck out the stalls and comb/feed/water them if she'd like some help.
See what happens.
Better to wait & see than to be too direct which may unnerve her or seem odd by saying something like "hey let's hang out and be friends."
It's completely different making friends as an adult.
So invite her for coffee, lunch, a movie and follow her response as your lead.
Strike up a conversation with her about horses. Then say - "hey - why don't we go riding together sometime?"
I think that writing her a note - might scare her - if she's like you. how do you know this acquaintance? How did you meet her? Do you live close to her?
If you have her phone number - call her - tell her you've been thinking about her and her love of horses...I think a phone call will go further than an e-mail or a note.
The desire for more friends is human nature. I think you might find a horse farm near you and see if there is a group there...find people with common interests...I hope you find the friends you are looking for!!
Good luck!!
Talk to her. Don't e-mail her. When you see her tomorrow, say the niceties, and then ask her about her horse. People love to talk about themselves (and what they have). Ask her about her riding experience, etc. Eventually, ask her about where to hire or borrow a horse in your area, because you are interested in getting back into riding.
If she is noncommittal, then you know she probably isn't interested in a riding friend. In that case, you haven't lost anything; you may have a bit of hurt feelings because she isn't interested in you, but most people aren't interested in you (or me!) anyhow; they're interested in themselves. On the other hand, maybe she will be glad to ride with you. You won't know until you've talked to her.
Friendships take lots of time to build. This might be a start.
