How to Tell Parents of Children I Nanny They Need More Baths and Cloths Washed.

I agree with you. Now, I'm hardly the poster mom for spic-and-span living, but dog poo? That's just gross.

That's the tricky part about off-the-books childcare arrangements: communicating expectations without jeopardizing the laid-back relationship. If the horse weren't already out of the barn on this one, I'd suggest setting ground rules before agreeing to watch the kiddos. It's not too late to communicate a few friendly, common-sense rules about hygiene and anything else involving what the children can catch from each other. The parents shouldn't take offense if you couch it in a practical way -- "I never thought about it before but now that there's so many kiddos in the house I'm thinking I need to tighten up on universal precautions. Nothing personal - I'm doing it with my children, too" -- rather than critically telling her what she needs to be doing (although I don't blame you for wanting to, it will definitely put the parents on the defense). Good luck!

I would call social services. They need some serious incentive to make a clean and safe environment for their kids. Bless you for caring for these sweet kids and wanting the best for their family.

I would probably start off by bathing them and washing their clothes. Then tell their parents that they appeared to have 'gotten into' some of their pets' waste, so you took care of it for them. You can kinda make it sound like you're assuming the parents had no idea, so it doesn't sound like you're blaming them. This might be enough to spur them into action without causing any hard feelings. I would do this once or twice, and then if the same situation continues to happen, you will have to let them know that you can't go on caring for them if they are going to arrive in that state every day. Have you been to the house? I would try and arrange to drop in for a visit...you may decide at that point that you really need to call social services. Like the other responders, it seems to me that if the children are covered in filth, the house is probably even worse. Could be a dangerous situation. I really feel for you but I feel truly sorry for the children. Best of luck and H. it all works out.

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What you have described I neglect and needs to be reported to child protective services. They keep the reporter annonomous so no worry of anyone finding out it is you.

If the church you attend is acting as an intermediary for finding this family childcare, maybe they can step in for this situation as well. All you said was that you were introduced for childcare purposes, but this sounds like someone was trying to help them work out a situation. So maybe you could start there, approach the appropriate person at the church, and tell them you are concerned about this family. Then maybe the church could mention it to them, offer counseling services, or whatever.

Otherwise, if this isn't feasible, I agree with everyone that you need to say something. For everyone's sakes, your kids, and theirs. This is not safe and there is something more going here.

I would just tell them, as diplomatically as you can. Or stop babysitting her kids.

Mind you, them having dog poop on themselves, is also a health hazard. What if there are worms or parasites in the dog poop for example, or diseases??? And besides, the kids stink. Eeeekk! AND this is getting in your house too, via those kids.
I H. they don't also have fleas.

Are you being paid for your child caring?
Your cleaning them and having to do so, is also taxing on your water bill and laundry, if you have to bathe them every darn day.

I would tell them. Having kids in poor cleanliness, is also a form of neglect. Especially since dog poop and pee, is all over the kids.
Can you imagine what their home looks like? There must be dog poop and pee all over the place if the kids are getting so so so soiled like that.

All the best,
Susan

call cps!!!!! child protective services!! this is a form of neglect and you can remain anonymous

I would give them a sponge bath or wipe down - there are 'refresh'wipes that are sponge baths without the water, and put them in fresh clothes. Wash the soiled clothes, and then give the clean clothes to the parents when they pick them up.

Quietly mention that the clothes had some dog poop on them, so you had the kid(s) change, and that they should be sure to give the kids a good washdown, in case some was missed. Then document it. If it happens again, then you'll need to take different steps.

M.

you're in a predicament....but truth be told, there really isn't anything wrong with wanting to heighten the awarement of your relatives in regards to hygiene/cleanliness, especially when it concerns your children's health.
presentation is everything. The first time you bring it up, think carefully of what/how you're going to approach them. Using a good amount of tact is key and maybe/hopefully all it would take is bringing it up gently once.
I'm trying to think what I would do if I were in your shoes. Basically, I would play it off like you were genuinely surprised about the condition their clothes were in and basically say something like, "You probably were so busy rushing out the door that you didn't even realize your son/daughter had gotten into some foul material right before it was time to go. I ended up cleaning them for you but wanted to make sure you were aware in case they get into it again before you head out in the morning again."
OR
"I don't know what it was but something your son/daughter had on them got on one of my nice towels/table cloths/etc. and I can't get it out and it smells awful. Do you know what they got into before they were dropped off at our house?"
Either one of those situations will alert them that their hygiene standards are affecting you/your children.
You may even have to give them a bath and then inform their parents that you had to do that since they had some sort of foul material on them and you wanted to make sure they didn't get sick from it.

I H. things get better for your sake and their children's sake. Sticky situation for sure.

I haven't read the other answers, but I am sure you know, that is unsanitary. I think you just need to be blunt and tell them. Its not healthy for them or you to have them in your home.
You could also call CPS and report them. Then they won't know its coming from you, since you can do it anonymously. They will check out the situation and take care of it.

Firstly, I don't think anyone else considered whether or not the boy may have gone out back and played wit the dog and got into some poo. Then maybe the mother told the boy it was time to go and they all just rushed to get in the car. The mother probably didn't even know or I'm sure that she wouldn't have sent her child to you.

Second, Do you have dogs? If you don't then maybe your are just sensitive to the smell of the dogs. If you do then maybe they just don't keep their dogs as clean as yours. Not everyone is as caring for the dogs. If they are outside dogs and the kids go outside to play with them before they are brought over to you, then of course they would smell like stinky dog.

I would definitely consider all the scenarios before calling social services and also talk to the parents. I'm sure you can do it in a cordial way.

Good Luck

Can you ask her about her children's bathtime routine? This may open a door to discussing bathing. If nothing works, ask her to always pack extra clothes for the kids. When they come to your place, change them into the clean clothes. If those are dirty too, mention to her that you couldnt find any clean clothes. This may start a discussion on laundry?
She may not realize if she's used to the smell in the house. Poor kids.

Poor kids!!! I would just tell them that they have to be clean and bathed for me to continue to babysit. I mean really poop and pee on thier clothes!!! I feel so bad for them. I would tell them the there animals are ruining the childrens clothes and making them smell bad. Do the parents smell also. I can not even imagine the house. Sorry but dog poop is a serious matter, could have worm, bugs and this will get you all sick!!!

Just be frank w/them. Just say, in a nice way something like: "I know we're family & have only just met but I'm no longer going to be able to watch your kids for you unless you start taking better care of them as far as cleanliness is concerned." then explain to them what you find when they come over (or if you go to their home) & just explain that while you don't mind washing them & their clothes every day, you simply don't have the time nor is it really your responsibility. Remind them of the filth & health concerns this poses. If you have to, get someone w/authority involved if necessary. I know you'd hate to do that but the kids' health is in concern. H. this helps. Good luck!

I mostly agree with you, except for the bathing everyday. My son (3 almost 4) has a horrible skin condition, his pedi recommended a bath 2-3 times a week no more and to try not to use much soap. Other than that I totally agree. I could not deal with the smell, yet alone have it in my house on a daily basis.

I know they are your cousins but I would consider calling social service. What are the kids living environments like if they come to your home with dog feces on their clothes!!! Since the parents obviously can't smell it, I can't imagine what the home looks like. If you don't want to to go that route, document every time they come to your home that way. Immediately bath them and put them in different clothes. Place their dirty clothes in a plastic bag and give it to your cousins when they pick up the kids. Explain that their was dog poop on their clothes and that it is a health risk to ALL the children in your home.