How to Stop Nursing Child to Sleep

The "No Cry Sleep Solution" book has some great suggestions to slowly ween babies from the breast-feeding to sleep thang. I do that with my little 7 month old girl, and I have my husband put her down, with a pacifier, book, sleep with her etc. There are other suggestions in that book. Actually, one thing it does suggest is to have a sippy cup in bed. I don't think that should be an issue, if it truly doesn't spill. Does he have a "lovey"...like a blanket, stuffed animal, etc? Just some ideas

Hi,

My youngest refused to go to bed without the breast until she was 18 months old.. I had been waiting to go onto an important medication, trying to wean her, for six months before that (I couldn't take the med while breastfeeding). Finally we found a solution, I handed her to daddy and he laid down with her in bed until she fell asleep. It was a rough week or two.. but we lived and now she's 2 1/2 and we are all happy.

Hi A.,

You didn't write if you are co-sleeping or not. If you are, I think this transition is much more challenging. If you are not, you might try eliminating nursing from one of the nap times first - give him some warm milk and read a few stories instead, put him in bed awake. Do that a few times, and then use that same approach at night. It's really helpful if your partner can help with some of the bedtime transitions, after the first two times when she was really angry, my dd didn't mind not nursing when her daddy put her to sleep. I started weaning my daughter at 15 months, and this approach worked best. The early morning weaning wasn't as hard to give up as I'd thought, I just let her fuss a few minutes and was surprised that she went back to sleep on her own, and then when she woke up for the morning I was ready with a glass of milk and a snack. As we got close to the end of weaning I put vinegar on my breasts each time she wanted to nurse and told her "nummies are sick". That helped, because the vinegar smells and tastes yucky.

One caveat though: My dd did wean at 15 months, in about 10 days, but then at 16 months she got pretty sick and was teething to boot, and in no time at all we were back to "nummies" pretty much around the clock. I just surrendered to it, and in another 8 weeks or so started weaning again, more slowly this time. At almost 20 months old, she is much more cognizant of what is going on, and is more ready to "self-wean" now, so we've been going more slowly the second time around and now just nurse a few minutes at night, which seems bonding for both of us. It's a process.

Good luck!

When i started to wean my son at about 14 months, i started a routine of reading books before a nap or bed. Then i took away one feeding at a time for a week, starting with the one that he seemed the least attached to. the hardest one was the before nap one. and also it was harder on me than on him i think! He did great, and we still have the story time before nap and bed routine. it makes for a bit of snuggle time that the nursing took away. Good luck!

I have a 19-month-old that was weaned fully at 18 months. I became pregnant again when he was about 11-months-old. This pregnancy was a total surprise, a good one, but I obsessed for months on what I was going to do with trying to nurse 2 kids, because my son was nowhere near giving up nursing at a year. Nursing while pregnant was not an issue at all for me, in fact, I think it actually helped the nausea at first. It also forced a bit of quiet built into the day. All that said, obviously did not want to be nursing 2 kids, and dealing with jealousy issues that could arise because of it.
At 15 months, I started by giving up nursing him ever during the day (in theory, I was nursing only at bedtime and during the night and in the morning, but really, there were other times too, if he happened to want it.) The next thing was to make it a personal policy to never put him down sleeping. This was a challenge, and there were a few tears, but, not many and I never let the tears get out of control. I just started detaching him right before he would drift off and get him to the crib. At first, he would start fussing and really have an issue with it... but he eventually figured it out. It took about 1-2 weeks to get him comfortable with that... and I still put him down sleeping the 3 days during the week that I have him for naptime (that he's not with a sitter.) All said and done... that was the hardest part. Weaning fell in line after that. I stopped nursing in the morning by making sure that breakfast was ready when he woke up (and he was usually hungrier in the morning than nursing could satisfy, anyway.) Then, I stopped the nighttime feedings. Those went away within about 2 weeks. At first, I just stopped feeding every time. I'd go in and pick him up and hug him for awhile, maybe sit and rock with him, then put him back down. He didn't understand at first, but never made a huge ruckus. If he did make a huge ruckus, I'd pick him back up, because I can't handle ruckus at 2 a.m. I started only feeding once at night... then he kind of naturally stopped doing that. He started preferring to just be held really closely. He started detaching himself at this time during the bedtime feeding. He'd just want to be held for awhile. I think the thing that helped was that he started associating behing held really closely with sleep and comfort, instead of nursing. That's the key... to get him to not associate nursing with calming down and drifting off. It took 3 months with my son. We went very slowly. But, in the end there were next to no tears associated with this process and I think it was about 2 or 3 weeks before he realized he was no longer nursing, and actually wanted to start again. But, that was nothing. So far, so good with him. I wish it had been quicker, but honestly, nothing could've been more gentle for him. And this is a boy who was extremely attached to nursing.
So. Good luck. Be blessed. Make sure that your little one knows, though, that you are making the decisions regarding this, if that makes any sense.

I have a 12 month old who we have been in the process of weaning. For us nursing at non-sleeping times has helped, so his tummy is full but he is awake while nursing. Then we either rock him or lay him down and rub his back while he falls asleep. It seems to be working and we are down to just nursing once in the evening and once in the morning when he gets up (and I enjoy those times so haven't been too eager to give them up). We did move him to another room to sleep and that has helped him sleep longer at night and not want mama at night.

We've just been working on this ourselves. We started by finding other ways to get him to fall asleep at naps; usually taking a stroller ride, or carrying him around in carrier on a walk. For some reason at daycare (3 days a week) he just lays down on a cot with no problem and goes to sleep (though the naps started out short, they are now over 1.5 hrs). In the morning, one morning I just stopped nursing him. I put his hand on my chest and he's been satisfied with that. Now he stays in his crib all morning and doesn't need it (but we still sometimes use it on weekends).

At night he's still nursing for a few minutes, and I pull my nipple out of his mouth. If he starts to get agitated, I re-offer it for a couple of minutes, then take it out again. That might or might not happen, sometimes it takes 3 times. Again, putting his hand on my bare chest seems to satisfy him after that.

Good luck! It's a little bittersweet. I think it's important to remember that it's a process that shows improvement over time.

We were in basically your situation when my dauther was 15 months, also wanting to get pregnant. We spent about a week weaning from nap and daytime nursings. We already had a decent bedtime routine established. Then you enlist the help of your husband. He may be the one who has to put your son down and night and get up with him. It only took our daughter a few nights. But I knew if I went in at night I would give in and nurse because we knew it worked and I was tired. We do give her a sippy of water in her crib, she seldom uses it but it is there if she gets thirsty.

When you're ready to stop nursing to sleep, you could try these things:
1. don't nurse in the room where he sleeps
2. nurse any other time of day except right before nap or sleep-time (like at the start of bedtime routine or in between naps)
3. make sure he is sleepy before you put him down to sleep
4. expect him to protest being put down awake--stay with him in the room (nearby, but maybe out of sight eventually)--don't feel like you have to lay him down and leave the room. Gradually move yourself out of the room.

From experience, this combination of steps has worked well for us. I love nursing my 9-month old to sleep, but it was important to us that he learned to go to sleep with or without nursing. Now that he has learned, he can still go to sleep without nursing, but it doesn't upset things if I do nurse him to sleep every now and then.

I never had to give up nursing because neither one of my boys ever got it do. So my advice could be taken with a grain of salt. But I dont know lots of mamas who have had to do give it up and the easlest one I saw was my girlfreind who quit cold turkey. Her daughter put up a stink for about three days but once the third day came around that was that like she forg ot all about it. I think if you did it like pulling off a bandaid fast and with your eyes closed it would work alot better then going slowly and having to deal with the pain week after week until your son was willing to give it up. At that rate he may never be willing to give it up. So like I said I personally have never actually done it so take it with a grain please but I think it would work the fastest for you! Good Luck when you go for number two!!!

Hi A.-

I stopped nursing my oldest at 15 months because I was pregnant again- I was afraid to stop nursing because I thought she would freak out and not be able to go to sleep on her own. I was wrong! I started giving her a bottle in the morning, but holding her on my lap while she drank it. After a few days of that, we switched to the sippy cup. That switch did not phase her. So then at bedtime, I just did the same thing. We did her whole bedtime routine but substituted the bottle/snuggle for nursing/snuggle. She really didn't care a bit. I was sad, but of course we mamas can get sad about babies sometimes. My 2nd baby is in the same process now- she has a bottle in the morning and soon will be having a bottle at nighttime too. Good luck!

Hi!! I just went through the same thing, exactly, with my daughter. She was 14 months and I would nurse her to sleep, when she woke, and to take naps. She didn't need it for nutrition but that's how she fell asleep. I honestly thought I would never be able to stop. It was a surprise how it happened for me. One day I got up with her, instead of getting more shut eye and did the normal routine. I just kept her fed and kept her busy. Before I knew it, it was afternoon and she hadn't wanted it at all. Getting her to take a nap, well..she just kinda fell asleep with a full tummy while I Was walking with her. (Has to be a better way :). I still nursed her to sleep though. After a week of this I laid down with her at bedtime and wouldn't give it to her. She cried for 10 minutes or so and would be all over me but eventually, she fell asleep. There's no easy way and I never thought it would happen for me, but it did. It's been 2 months now and we're all done. I think I Went through some withdrawls more than she did. It's so nice to have a little freedom with my body again. I don't know if this will help you at all but it was sure nice reading your story to know that I wasn't the only one with the EXACT situation. Keep your baby busy so he doesn't have time to think about nursing is my advice. It will happen, believe or not. Take Care ~~ :o)( Now I need to work on getting her in her own bed...)

My advice might sound harsh but I stopped cold turkey and "Ferberized" my daughter at 5 months. We put her to bed awake, sleepy but awake and she learned how to put herself to sleep and stay asleep all night... It took 3 nights (first night she cried for 17 minutes, second night 8 minutes, third night 2 minutes) now maybe 30 seconds to 2 minutes and has slept through the night (unless sick with the flu) ever since. She is now 8 1/2 months old.
By the time your child is 12 lbs. they don't need to eat during the night, they just want the company and will continue to cry if they know you will give in.
My advice for getting through the first week of this... yard work outside or loud movie inside so you don't have to hear the crying.
Hope this helps, it does work!

If you don't have to stop breastfeeding when your baby turns 1, why do you have to take the bottle away? I say do what works best for your situation. I had a second baby when my first was almost 15 months so I decided to hold off on taking away the bottle (he was born with a cleft palate so he never breastfed, but I pumped for him for 9 months). He is now a little over 2 and still likes a bottle to go to bed with, but I have decided it is time to transition him. I am not looking forward to it, but when we took away his binkie there were about 3 bad days and then he was pretty much over it, so I'm hoping for the same here. Good luck with whatever you decide.