How to Get My Nine Week Old to Sleep Without Me

Try putting her down to sleep when she is awake but really sleepy. She will get used to falling asleep on her own. I did that with my son and he is great at going to sleep on his own and also going back to sleep if he wakes up in the middle of the night.

A.,
Someone already said this but it worked for us, I use my t-shirt for the day and a sat on it and a blanket and when it was time to sleep for me even though she was already asleep on me or my husband we would wrap her in my shirt or lay it right next to her and lay her on the warm blanket, she hated that she was transferred to a cold bed. Give that a try and just like everyone says, you are mom and you really do know best!
Liz

Hi A.,

I have also experienced what you are going through.I have had 4 children & all are different. I was able to put my first daughter to bed only in a vibrating papasan chair for the longest time, I then swithched to the playpen (we baught padding & made it her bed, next to ours) and bought a back massager to vibrate the bed & lull her to sleep in the playpen. That worked & then soon enough she did not need it anymore. I also made the mistake of (well I loved it, just hard to break) rocking her to sleep when she got to be about 18 months or so, that took 1 year to break. I loved the bonding time, hated the breaking time.

I also had twins, I understand the need to put them down and leave them. My twin daughter was easy, she just always went to sleep when I put her down. Her twin brother, well he was wayyyyyyy different. I had to rock him, pat him & beg him to sleep. But he only did this to me, not anyone else, so do not concerne yourself with daycare. I was so tired at one point (My husband travels 5 days out of the week) lacking days of sleep, that I actually could not stay up to pat his back one evening & left him to cry. He did for more than 1/2 hour, He was probably 12 weeks by then, and he fell asleep. The next night I tried to do it again, late in the evening/early morning when I fed him, I laid him down and let him cry it out. Mommies have to sleep tooooo!

So do what makes you comfortable and what you can with your own limitations. Your child will follow suit. Babies need and want that attention & if you have the ability give them all they need & want, do so, you can not spoil a baby!!!!! But remember it is not hurting them to cry it out a little. This age is so wonderful, I loved the holding & constant presence of thier little bodies, so enjoy as much of it as you can. You two are going to miss each other when you are at work, so take this time & drink in as much of your together time as you can. All other problems will work themselves out.

Enjoy your baby.
Good Luck

When you lay her down she's going from a warm body to a cool sheets. Put a blanket in the dryer and warm it up and then put it down before you put her down. Or you can even put it under you to warm it if you're sitting or lying down while she falls asleep in your arms.

I truly feel your pain! I have a two year old and i went through the same exact thing. It was not until he was three months old when i went back to work(i worked nights at the time) that it was nipped in the bud. i just had twins and the same pattern was starting. SO, although it has been difficult and there are some nights that are not as great as the others this is what i have been doing. i tried to start a routine so they will know it is time for bed. bath (with this lavender bedtime stuff, i swear it helps!) followed by lotion rub down, then pj's and SWADDLE (the most important part). then i keep the lights low, noise low and the last feeding (which is breastmilk in a bottle... they seem to fall asleep at the boob, then i do... defeats the purpose). when done eating and groggy but not asleep, i put them down (obviously one at a time) in their crib/pack n play. lights out, mobile with soft music on. honestly, sometimes they go right down (this is called self soothing and i learned from my first son is very important) and sometimes they cry. it is ok for your daughter to cry. babies do make a lot of noise. i would suggest that when she cries, let her whimper for a little. but if she gets that blood curdling scream, go in to see her, rock her, kiss her and keep things calm. i know it seems extreme this routine, but this has been the first time in the seven weeks since they were born that i got more than two hours of sleep at a time (got five last night). remember that babies are noisy sleepers, so do not go get her first thing, wait a little, she might go back to sleep. it probably will not be easy but trust me it gets better. good luck, please feel free to email me with any questions! congrats on your little girl!

A.

I know how you feel. We have an 11 week old, and just recently she has been able to go to sleep on her own. The only thing is she sleeps only on her stomach not her back. So I sleep next to her to monitor her sleeping because of SIDS. Before that she slept in the swing or on my husband and I. Just after she is done eating, try putting her down. She will eventually go down on her own. I do understand though it is frustrating and tiring.

GOOD LUCK!!!
C.

Hi A.,

What worked for me was dirty laundry. I know that must sound gross, however I would use a shirt or sleeping gown that I used recently and lay my son either on it or let him cuddle with it like a safety blanket. I rocked my son to sleep for 18 mnths, as long as he could still smell me he would sleep just fine even after I put him down in his crib. Of course I had to stop rocking him due to him getting so big he couldn't get comfortable in my arms to fall asleep:) Every mom and household is different so do what works for you. Best of luck!!!

The "eat, play, sleep" schedule works excellent. I have a 5 month old and she does great on it. As soon as she wakes feed her, then let her "play" then fall asleep....she will not associate eating and sleeping. Eventually her "play" time will get longer and her naps will be less. I started this when she was about 8 weeks old. She would go through the cycle in about an hour and a half, but now she is 5 months and her cycle is every 4 hours. Especially if you continue to nurse, it will be nice to know about when she will eat....it sure does help me! Hth!

Hi A.,
I had this problem with my first little girl. It's really hard at first but you just have to let her cry it out a couple of times. Soon she'll get the hang of it and it will be no problem. If you continue the way you are going, you'll have a 3 year old sleeping in your bed. TRUST me.

LOL, I need some advice as well, my two year old still sleeps with me. ;-)

Try reading the book, The No Cry Sleep Solution http://www.amazon.com/No-Cry-Sleep-Solution-Gentle-Throug...

I'm reading the toddler version of this book right now.

Good Luck!

You're the mom -- so follow your gut. I have three children and I handled them all a little bit differently. My first little one I rocked to sleep and let her fall asleep on me after nursing -- and although the bonding was great and wouldn't have changed it.....i read since then that waking them up a little and then putting them in the bassinett/crib so that they are aware enough of where they are going to sleep might be more helpful. (Imagine your surprise if you fell asleep on the couch and woke up in the bath tub -- you may cry a little too out of disorientation.)
My second and third little ones -- I would nurse them -- and if they fell asleep I'd wake them up (if i didn't fall asleep too) -- and make sure they were finished nursing and then I would put them in a bassinett next to my bed -- laying a hand on their belly if they cried a little and letting them know i'm right there. I, myself, needed sleep by that time -- so that worked for me. (when they grew and were too big for the bassinett -- around 3 months or so? and i was ready for the distance -- they went off to their crib in their room) I still would cuddle with them in their afternoon naps because that bonding and cuddling time I just wouldn't give up. But the night time feedings I made it all about business and less about cuddling because I desperately needed my sleep. You have to figure out what works for you. And don't worry about the daycare people. I'm sure you chose wisely, and they've handled thousands of little babies.

The first few days my sister was helping me out, she'd hold Hannah while I could sleep. This did the same thing, Hannah would cry everytime I put her down. I just had to tough it out, as she couldn't always sleep on mommy. It does break your heart, but seriously it's for her you are doing this. Good luck. PS. try to get her used to movement, then put her in a swing or bouncer, you can modify the movements until she is laying still. Then move her into the crib. Take care, Jen

You need to teach your baby to go sleep by herself. Start a routine, and keep doing everyday. Your baby is older and she might cry a few nights but it would worked. My daughter is 16 m and she si been going to sleep almost at the same time every night we just have to tell her night night and that's it.
I use The Ferber method and it works if you do it.
My baby goes to sleep at 7:00pm and she gets up at 7:00 or 7:30 am, and when she does she plays with her stuff animals and the calls me or her dad. Also at the beggining she start getting up at 5:00 and I let her cry (nothing happens to her- look internet about bletting a baby cry) and the with a few days she got to seven and was waking up happy.
Also they said some babies sget up in the middle of the night when they r getting teeth what I did is to put orajel before putting to sleep and giving her some tylenol and thats it. My friend start getting up with her baby when this happen and he is 2 years now and still does.
It is up to you how you and if you do it .Somebody really close to me right now has to go sleep with her son who's 5 years old in the same bed and her husband in the bed next to them.
http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/7755.html

A.,
Oh boy, do I remember that. I remember having to try several different pacifiers before I found one my daughter would take. There are so many options- silicone, latex, orthodontic. I think I ended up giving her silicone orthodontic nuk pacifier. It took a while for her to get the hang of it too. At that stage she kept pushing it out, but eventually she got it. I think I remember doing a switch while she fell asleep at my breast.
As a warning for the future, I had a hard time getting her to give it up. I really should have taken it away around 12 months. She could soothe herself by then. Another draw back was I had to run into her room in the middle of the night because it would fall out while she was sleeping. Then, she'd wake up without it and start crying.
I hope that helps. I feel for you.
H.

this may sound rude & it is certainly not my intention to be rude, but...

I wouldn't worry about daycare. they are experts and they will deal with your baby- they have their own 'ways' to get babies to sleep, to feed them, etc.

personally, I would try my best to enjoy my baby *now* in the 'here & now' before having to return to work...

Enjoy your Babymoon!!!!

My 2nd daughter was that way. I always nursed lying down with her. She would fall asleep, and I would get up and go to my bed. I did that until she was old enough to start sleeping through the night. I wouldn't worry about daycare. Your daughter will probably act different with other people. My daughter acts completely different when my husband takes care of her. I hope this helps. Good luck!

Babies know their mom and mom's soft heart. I dont think it will be an issue at daycare. She'll know that doesnt fly at the daycare, kids adjust to what is around them, they usually put them on a schedule pretty quickly.

Enjoy your daughter because this time goes sooooo fast it is unbelievable. Enjoy all the cozy moments you can! My firstborn, my son was like this. I would breastfeed him laying down- side by side and then slid off the bed once he was knocked out. Then I would put pillows around the edges of the bed. A little older I used to lie him on his tummy and pat him on his back/butt until he passed out. I can't keep track of what is ok anymore (back/side/face up) so I'm not sure if that is "safe", they are always changing what is supposed to be safe, but it worked for me!

Good luck and enjoy your precious little one!