How to Celebrate Adoption?

Updated on October 18, 2011
E.M. asks from Chicago, IL
14 answers

My cousin and her husband have been trying to have a baby for over 6 years and about a year ago they started the adoption process. They were selected by birth parents in an open adoption and the child was born this morning. Assuming everything goes as planned, they will have the baby home in a couple days. I am so very happy for them! I plan to travel (about a 7 hour trip) to meet the baby in January, at which time I'll bring a gift. In the meantime, is there something special I can do for the new family? Any ideas on finding a meal delivery service in another state? Flowers? Cookies? A card? Every time I think about them, my eyes fill with tears of joy!

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Meals.. Or gift cards to a food delivery service.

When you get there offer to babysit so they can go out..

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3.B.

answers from Cleveland on

YAY! How exciting :) Send them a giftcard, target, walmart, babies r us....

Or a giftcard to a local grocery store. DIAPERS lol
Congrats to your whole family :)

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M.E.

answers from Chicago on

Do the same thing you would do for your cousin if she had the baby herself. Although she won't need time to heal, they will be sleep deprived as any new parents would be. Since you're in Chicago, send a Lou Malnatis pizza or some Portillos beef. My MIL orders a lot of food products from QVC and has never had a problem with any of them and they ship anywhere.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree to wait until they have the baby for sure at their house! It would be terrible if the birth mother changed her mind, but it happens.

Anyway I got an Edible Arrangement once and they are seriously delish! I kind of thought they were cheesy, but now I think they're awesome! ;) Lou Malnati's was also a good suggestion, I know they ship cross country. I have also ordered food products from QVC and they seem to be good. There is another place in Michigan called Zingerman's and their food is super tasty too! It's a bit expensive but they have a gift pack already made called a new baby basket, or something like that, filled with all sorts of goodies.

Or you could make it easy and just ship some gift cards to places like Panera, Boston Market, Noodles and Co, etc. That way they can pick up meals as they wish or need!

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R.N.

answers from Sioux City on

We adopted our baby in May. PLEASE do what you would do for any friend/cousin who gave birth. I didn't have to deal with the physical affects of child birth but we were still tired and adjusting to having a newborn.

If you plan to do a meal service, go ahead and schedule it - or send gift cards for local delivery places (lifesaver for us!). Even if they birth parent chooses to parent and not place, when you are so grief-stricken, you don't feel like cooking food (we went thru a failed placement in August 2010) and having a meal prepared which help.

Don't ask a ton of questions. They will volunteer what information they are OK with you knowing about the birth family and the situation.

Flowers, cookies, cards, baby items, gift certificatest, etc - all are great ideas! We received an awesome cookie bouquet that was delicious.

Take your cues from them too. Many families lay low until the termination of parental rights has been signed and any revocation period is over. We wanted to celebrate right away but limited to select family and friends for the first week until the revocation period was complete.

The bottom line is that even if the birth mom chooses to parent, your cousin and her husband most likely already consider this their child in their hearts. They want this baby to be celebrated as much as any biological child would have been celebrated.

So happy for your cousin and her husband! Adoption is a beautiful thing!

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I have sent meals from Omaha Steaks.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

I'm so happy! My aunt and uncle waited 15 years and were able to adopt 2 children through open adoption. Check out the link below.

http://ww11.1800flowers.com/welcome.do?cm_mmc=tagged-_-fl...

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B.C.

answers from Dallas on

When my husband adopted my daughter, my MIL got her a precious moments adoption ceramic thingy. It was so sweet! That was when she was 4 and she's almost 11 and still has it on her bookshelf. :) I love that your family gets to delight in this moment! It's so amazing! She got the older child one, but here is the infant one:
http://www.bonanza.com/listings/Precious-Moments-Adoption...

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J.G.

answers from Rockford on

That is fantastic!
I completely understand what everyone is saying about waiting until the baby is at their home, I've heard stories.
BUT! Don't let the stories make you worried. Anything would be great. Do you know if they plan on a baby shower after they bring home the baby? If so have they registered anywhere? A new baby is a new baby no matter who gives birth, so all the same things are needed. Food is always a good thing, but so diapers and blankets. I always liked when people gave my children plush toys as infants (granted they didn't play with them for a year or so, but we already had them so they were great).

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D.K.

answers from Columbus on

We were sent an edible arrangement when we had our son and it was wonderful to be able to pull out fresh fruit to snack on. Congratulations to your family and hope all goes great.

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B.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Do the same as you would do when any newborn comes home. If you arrange for food, just make sure the baby is home first, and that you can cancel if the birth parent changes her mind in the first few days. My brother and sister-in-law adopted in a private adoption and we had a baby shower when she was about a month old.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

You can find a local food delivery service by googling the city and food delivery. You may have to try different variation of words.

If you want to send gift cards to a restaurant, google the restaurant to be sure they have one in their city.

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R.A.

answers from Chicago on

Meal delivery is an incredible boon during those first few crazy days. My husband and I still talk about the friend who brought us a huge bowl of cold sesame noodles. We didn't even need to heat them up - we just ate straight from the bowl! But I agree with those who caution you to wait until they've brought the baby home.

☆.H.

answers from San Francisco on

How lovely!
I'd caution you to wait until they've had the baby about week. My brothers in law recently adopted. The first time they were selected they got a call on their way to the hospital to pick up the baby informing them that the mom changed her mind! Second time mom had something like 48-72 hours to change her mind, and did. Third time seems to be a charm, but it's not official until a court date a few months from now.

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