How to Best Treat Daughter's Skin After She Licks Her Fingers and Rubs Her Face

Updated on September 19, 2014
M.B. asks from Milwaukee, WI
10 answers

Hi helpful mamas, how are you? My daughter is having a problem that baffles me and I hope you may have some advice for me. My 6-year-old has been sucking two of her fingers on one hand since babyhood. I and everyone who cares about her have been trying to break her of this bad habit by reminding her not to do it each time we see her sucking her fingers. Now, since about a week ago, she has not only been sucking her fingers, but she puts her fingers in her mouth and repeatedly rubs her wet fingers on either side of her nose, leaving her skin there red and chapped. I asked her why she does that and she said it was because her skin felt dry, so I sent her to school with a chapstick to use on her face instead of her spit. So, she lost the chapstick, and today when we got home from school she was so red and I gave her petroleum jelly to put there. She says her face feels a little better, but the petroleum jelly is so shiny... I was wondering of any of you know of an ointment that would be safe to use on her face even if she accidentally gets some in her mouth. I wish I knew how to break her of this habit, but until I can do that I want to heal her face. Many thanks for any advice you have for me. *peace*!

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So What Happened?

Hi y'all! Thanks so much for your thoughtful replies (and so quickly!) I will try the coconut oil, I have some Wildtree Coconut Oil. It's solid in the jar and I bought it for cooking but I just tried it on my own skin and it's oily but soothing. I will send a small container with the coconut oil along with her to school with instructions to her teacher to let her have some when she needs it. I hope that does the trick. Also I like the worry bead suggestion, though when she gets caught playing with any small item she sneaks to school (like a bead or other trinket) she gets it taken away. She does like to pick at anything fuzzy and I let her have a scarf to pick at but that doesn't seem to stop the finger-sucking. Thanks for letting me know that it's good to "ignore" and not give her a hard time, though I was so exasperated tonight I took her to the mirror and showed her face to her and said that when she rubs her face and makes it red it doesn't look right. I hope I didn't damage her by saying that. I did later give her lots of hugs and we read a book before bedtime. I told her I love her so much and tomorrow is a new day. Thanks again y'all... *Peace*!

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C.B.

answers from Cleveland on

I second the coconut oil suggestion. Aquaphor, Vaseline, etc. would not taste good if it got in her mouth.

My friend's nephew's hand was raw when he was teething. Friend said she was going to tell his mom to get Vaseline. I suggested she get coconut oil and she said within a couple days his hand was so much better. She also said she never thought about him getting Vaseline in his mouth if she used that and felt the coconut oil would be better.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Try coconut oil.
For thumb sucking for our son, we initially cut it back to just nap time and bed time.
Eventually he gave it up completely but it seemed like it took a long time.

4 moms found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from Portland on

My kids have had a similar rash from fevers and wiping snot. I bought a tube of auqaphor and used it on their faces. My daughter was better within 12 hours, and I only needed to do one more coat to heal it the rest of the way. My son took a couple of days because he kept adding more snot to it as he wiped his nose, but he is a lot better too. Coconut oil worked, but not as well, and it also had the shiny factor. I think the $5 for the auqaphor lip treatment (what I used) was worth it!

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M.S.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Aquaphor is a really good product for rashes. My heart goes out to you and your girlie! Maybe it is time to talk to a therapist to find out some ideas about why she does this and what might help. I wonder if she has some sensory issues or maybe some anxiety? Blessings!

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J.S.

answers from Boise on

If you have a Whole Foods near you, or a store that sells natural products, get some puremedy first aid salve. It's AMAZING and completely safe to ingest, made with 100% food grade ingredients. You can find it online as well: http://www.puremedy.com/firstaid.html It's expensive, but works quickly and you only need a pea-sized amount to see big results. I use it for all kinds of cuts and skin rashes now.

After she's healed, try Carolla's Beeswax Cream http://www.carollas.com/. It's also safe to ingest and works wonders as a protective barrier on skin without using petroleum products (not safe to ingest OR good for the skin).

I use both on my son during ski season because he likes to chew on his gloves and constantly wipes snot off his face with wet gloves. Totally gross, I know, and causes serious skin irritation. When he's got the "bees cream" on, he doesn't end up with any irritation. If we forget it, he comes off the hill all chapped and then starts licking around his mouth trying to "fix" the chapped skin, only making it worse. So I *feel* the pain you're having with your daughter.

Not sure how to help with the finger sucking thing. Maybe give her some worry beads or a worry stone to keep in her pocket/wear as a necklace. Sounds like she might need to transfer some nervous energy somewhere.

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V.S.

answers from Reading on

Being that your name is mamakitty, are you sure she's not just washing after a snack?

(And I love coconut oil)

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Z.B.

answers from Toledo on

Vaseline is wonderful! It's even better than any lip balm. I use it on my lips in the winter, but it's great on any chapped skin.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

I suggest that if you ignore the finger licking and the face wetting she will eventually stop on her own. By paying attention to it you are reinforcing the habit. I suggest it's a nervous habit and by telling her to stop she is more nervous.

Give her a "fidgit" to play with and keep her fingers busy. My grandson likes a small rubber ball that has numerous strands of rubber all around it. Also a fake rubber egg. The ball is clear so you can see the yoke and feel it and move it around. He holds one in his lap and fidgets with it. He also is allowed/encouraged to chew gum at school. He does have an IEP.

Talk with her teacher and see if she can do this. If not at school I suggest you try it at home.

As to the skin I suggest using a cream or lotion. I suggest chap stick will add another texture to her skin causing her to rub it more.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

My GD uses Ponds cream on her face daily. She also was having very dry areas on her face and the Ponds has taken care of that. There are two kinds - the one you want has the blue lid - the pink one is make-up remover, I think.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The chapstick will actually do a good job and it's a matte finish usually.

I fully support you in trying to stop this now. Kids who need to suck and don't get a pacifier for this will take whatever they can get, fingers, the corner of a blanket, a toy, etc...they need to suck and they'll find a way.

My daughter did this and she has a recessed jaw. The sucking on her fingers caused her bones to grow badly.

I was pretty passive when it came to this. I'd say things like "Don't suck your fingers" but in truth, the urge to suck is a primeval sort of genetic thing. If we didn't have the urge to suck when we were born we'd starve, so it's part of our makeup, our genetic code.

You need to aggressively approach this. I wish I'd have smacker my daughter's hands every time I saw her doing this. If I had physically done things to make her stop her bones in her face would have grown right.

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